Chapter 22

CHAPTER 22

MACI

A s we walk into Kayla's living room, I realize my mistake. Lukas and I have arrived together, but I almost laugh at the thought. Does that really matter now? Arriving together? She's heard us being intimate, moaning, almost having sex, wanting to have sex. This is minor compared to that.

Kayla is sitting on the couch, her hand on Finn's arm. I didn't expect to see that. Shouldn't she hate him? Finn is hunched over, vomiting into a bucket, and crying at the same time.

"I'm sorry," he moans. "Kayla, I'm sorry."

Lukas glances at me, apparent surprise in his piercing eyes. "Kayla," he says, turning to his daughter.

I expect to see hatred in her eyes, the resentment that has plagued my nightmares since the steaminess in the pool. Instead, she smiles like she's relieved. She glances at me, and the smile doesn't falter.

"Sit down," she murmurs, seeming too preoccupied with rubbing Finn's back to note that Lukas and I arrived at the same time.

We sit on the other couch. Finn looks in bad shape, his shirt covered in sweat, his hair shining. He's got both arms wrapped around a wastebasket.

"What's going on?" Lukas asks.

"Finn's told me some pretty crazy stuff," Kayla murmurs, in that tone that tells me she's struggling to keep it together. It's the same tone she had when her mom passed.

"He has?"

Finn looks up, his eyes bloodshot and watery. He looks miserably at Lukas. "I told her everything I had to. All the stuff that was eating me up."

He emphasizes me . Is that a hint? Is he telling us he hasn't revealed the recording? Then what else could he have said?

"I didn't know what to do," Kayla says. "If I should call the cops."

"Ashley," Finn mutters, shuddering as though fighting off a sob.

"Who's Ashley?" I ask.

"His sister," Kayla says.

"My big sister," Finn grunts, "but I had to take the lickin'. I had to take it. Otherwise, that piece of shit would have hit…" He keels over, puking again.

"The cops?" Lukas says. "Explain, Kayla."

"Finn's drunk, Dad," she responds, "but he said?—"

"They've got Ashley," Finn cuts in, "and they've got your friend, your business partner, Sebastian." He speaks slowly and deliberately as if putting effort into getting every word right. "They've been using me for months. Trying to get me to seduce your daughter to get to you. If I don't, they'll hurt Ashley."

"Wait." Lukas bolts to his feet, his jaw pulsing as he clenches his teeth. I almost have to sit on my hands to stop myself from reaching up, touching him, trying to calm him down. It's so painful to see my man in so much agony and not be able to help. " Who has them? What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Dad, just let him explain," Kayla snaps.

She's defending Finn despite what he's just admitted. I can read the tension in her face, the apparent internal conflict. She's struggling not to let herself spiral into the drama and the stress. Now I want to go to her .

"They're like a cult," Finn says slowly. "Anti-technology. A bunch of up-their-own-ass morons." He swallows, then places the wastebasket down. "Can I get a glass of water?"

When Kayla moves to stand, I say, "I'll get it." Going into the kitchen gives me a few moments to compose myself. I was so amped up on the way here, even if Lukas couldn't tell. I was so ready for an explosion. Now, there's this strange numb feeling. All I know is I need to be there for my friend, even if we're still lying to her.

Finn sips the water. "They want to send the world back to the Dark Ages. It sounds stupid. It is stupid, but it's what they want. Their leader calls himself Nobody."

"Wait a second," Lukas says, taking out his phone.

"Who're you calling?" Finn says with a sudden edge to his voice. "If they think the cops are after them, they'll kill my sister. They'll kill your friend."

"I'm not calling the cops," Lukas says. "I'm calling my private investigator. He'll need to hear all this, too."

After Lukas makes the call, Finn goes on. "This Nobody ass hooked up with my sister, got her hooked on drugs, then kidnapped her. He's had her prisoner for months. She's all we have—I mean, each other. Mom and Dad are gone. They were scumbags." Finn looks at Kayla. " I'm a scumbag, Kayla. I lied to you."

"Just tell Dad the rest," Kayla says stiffly. "We can talk about that later."

"They wanted me to find some dirt on you," Finn says, "but I thought to myself, screw that. If I get dirt, I'll get some cash, and with that cash, I'm gonna run."

I gasp. "And abandon your sister?"

"It's hard to explain." Finn buries his face in his hands. "To try and deal with this, I told myself I was some sociopath—a predator. I tried to tell myself I didn't have feelings. I tr-tried…" He breaks down, shaking all over. If this is acting, then it's beyond Oscar level. I've never seen somebody break down like this before, except when something terrible has happened. "But I can't. I have to do the right thing. I have to. I need help . I've done bad things. I know that. I've lied, but I need to get Ashley back."

"And I need Sebastian," Lukas says fiercely. "What sort of state was he in when you saw him?"

"He had a nasty bruise," Finn says. "He looked angry and ready for a fight."

"We need to tell the PI everything," Lukas says. "From start to finish, with as much detail as you can remember."

Finn nods. "I'll need some coffee."

"I'll make it." Kayla leaps to her feet, leaving the room. I can tell she wants to find somewhere private to shed a few tears. I know her well enough to understand she doesn't want me to follow her.

Finn glances at the door, then looks at Lukas. "They don't have the recording," he whispers. "I never showed it to them. I'm the only one who had it, and I never listened to the whole thing. Just enough to know what I had was worth something."

Lukas scowls. I touch Lukas' arm—probably a mistake, but it feels so right. "He's trying to help us," I say quietly.

"Delete the damn thing," Lukas says.

"I will, but it's in my apartment, not here. Do you want me to go there now?"

"No." Lukas shakes his head, and then his phone buzzes. He checks it. "The PI will be here in ten. Drink some coffee and try to get your mind as sharp as possible. We need details , Finn, to save Seb and your sister."

Finn nods. "I can do thi—" He pukes into the wastebasket again.

Lukas, Finn, and the PI—a man called Gabriel Walker—go into the study for their questioning. I'm in Kayla's bedroom with her, my hand on her shoulder as she leans forward and stares at the floor, biting her lip.

"I can't believe it," she whispers. "He said it wasn't all lies. He said he really does want to be a poet, and his childhood was exactly what he told me, but can I ever forgive him for this?"

I think she's speaking rhetorically, but then she turns to me. I hate myself so much at this moment. It's a sharp, acid feeling that flows through me. It's the knowledge that, in a different life, I could support Kayla without this shard of guilt stabbing me in the gut.

"I don't know," I whisper. "I guess it depends."

"On what?"

"If he's telling the truth and whether he's a good person or a bad one. He clearly has problems. It seems like even he doesn't know who he is."

"He's been vulnerable with me before," Kayla murmurs. "Now I don't know if it was real or part of his scam."

"It hasn't been long," I tell her.

She shakes her head. "It's not about the length of time, Maci. It's about how deep the feelings are. Go on. Tell me I'm setting myself up for heartbreak again. Tell me that makes no sense."

Yet I can't say that. I know exactly what she means. The number of hours spent together isn't the point. It's the intensity of the feeling, the certainty of the connection. The same feeling makes me want to go to Lukas, hold him, and tell him everything will be okay, even if it's a lie.

"Sometimes, if you know, you know," I say.

"Whoa. I didn't expect you to say that."

"But you have to be careful," I go on. "He's drunk right now."

"I know. He might wake up and regret all this. Even if he does, at least we know the truth."

"Do you miss before… when you didn't know? When he was just Ethan?"

She leans back, rubbing her hands up and down her legs. She's got the same restless energy I've seen so many times before, at so many other times in our lives. I remember her doing this when studying for big exams or waiting for a boy to text her back and on and on. A thousand everyday memories flow through me.

"No," she says finally. "Even if it's painful, knowing the truth is better. At least now, if we build— if there's anything to build—it can be on solid, real ground. I'd rather be miserable and have it be real than happy, and it's fake. Maybe that makes me nuts."

I swallow, a small voice hissing inside me. Tell her, tell her, tell her, but my cowardice won't let me.

"Yeah," I say lamely. "I know what you mean."