43. Colt - Don’t Leave Me

Sunlight streamed in through the hospital’s windows around 7am, waking me.

Taking in Mer’s limp, sleeping body in the hospital bed smacked me like a blindside hit. The different cords hooked up to her arm, the swollen black eye and bruised cheek, the brace holding her broken collarbone in place.

All of that could be healed. She just needed to wake up.

I couldn’t lose her, not right when we found our way back to each other.

Losing her this way would be a million times worse. Because when I lost her the first time, at least I knew she was somewhere out there, living in this world with me, and that thought gave me comfort.

Her lightness, her goodness, it couldn't be taken from this earth. Not yet. I prayed over and over again, not yet. Please, not yet.

Deep down, I couldn’t help but feel responsible.

Because I asked her to leave practice early and go pick up Lucy. She was rushing because of me. If she would’ve stayed at the rink, stuck to her usual schedule, maybe she wouldn’t have been in the accident.

Fuck.

She had to be okay.

I couldn't lose her.

Lucy couldn’t lose her.

Not like this.

I reached to hold her hand and gave it a squeeze before stretching over her bed and pressing a kiss mixed with my tears to her hair.

After Piper’s call last night, there’s no way I could stay in that state, let alone play a hockey game. Thank God Kappy and JP were with me and they could think clearly, because I was losing my mind. They quickly filled in Coach and ordered me an uber back to the airport.

I was luckily on a plane back to Chicago within the hour.

In the meantime, Kappy had Piper pick up Lucy, and JP had Hans head to the hospital to stay with Mer until I could get there.

At that time, I’d been too filled with panic to be grateful for our little family, but sitting here now, I realized how lucky we were. We just needed a tiny bit more luck. Just enough so she’d wake up from this, then I’d spend the rest of my life filled with fucking gratitude.

“Your sleeping beauty’s taking her time, huh?” an older nurse with curly black hair asked from the doorway. I think she said her name was Cheryl, but I could barely think straight when she spoke to me last night.

Swallowing hard, I nodded.

She regarded me with a sad smile as she walked to the side of Mer’s bed and checked all her vitals.

I continued holding her small hand in mine. I’d stay here as long as she needed me. She just needed to wake up.

“When she wakes, she’s gonna be a little out of it. It looks like the doctor might come in around–”

“Lucy?”

My head whipped around to Mer.

The nurse’s eyes widened before she sped out of the room.

“Lucy?” Mer croaked and squinted open one of her sky blue eyes. My chest felt like it was going to cave in relief. “Where?” She looked around the room and then winced at the sharp movements.

“Hey,” I said, standing over her to calm her. “You’re okay. Take it easy, eh?” I gently held her face. The relief was so overwhelming that tears filled my eyes and a laugh popped out of me.

“Did you… pick up… Lucy?” she rasped, squinting at me like the light bugged her.

She was in an accident that almost took her life, but she was still worried about Lucy. My heart swelled to the point of pain.

“Yes, she’s okay. Everything’s okay,” I said as soothingly as I could.

Her eyes fluttered closed and she looked way more relaxed. But that only lasted a split second. Her body went stiff as a board. “Colt?”

“Yeah, baby?” I held her hand and brought it to my lips to kiss.

Her bleary eyes cracked open. “Where are we?”

I kissed her knuckles. “The hospital. Everything’s okay now.”

Her grip on my hand tightened. “Why?” she whisper-cried. Her eyes bolted around the hospital room, looking feral, and her breathing went ragged. “My knee?”

“No, your knee is okay,” I said firmly. “You’re okay. Look at me , Mer. I’m right here with you. You were in a car accident yesterday. You’ve been out all night. You have some scrapes and bruises, a broken collarbone, and probably a nasty concussion, but your knee is totally fine, alright?”

Her eyes went glassy. “Don’t leave me here.” Her fingers went white from gripping my hand so hard. “Please don’t leave me here,” she begged, then she started shaking.

“Hey, you’re okay. Just breathe,” I told her. I wanted to grab her up in a hug, but I was afraid of hurting her. “Don’t hyperventilate on me, sweetheart.”

“We need to get out of here, Colt. I hate…” Her eyes went wide with panic. “Oh, God, I don't feel so good. Everything’s spinning.” Her face paled to a dangerous shade.

“You’re gonna pass out. Breathe,” I demanded.

“Get me,” she wheezed.

My heart rate skyrocketed. “Get you what?”

“Out of here.” She gulped for air. “Please.”

“Breathe baby, then we can go. You’re okay, I promise. You don’t have to be scared, I’m right here with you.”

But a second later, her grip loosened and her body went limp.

Nurses whirled around us.

“She’s afraid of hospitals. She’s just afraid. She passed out,” I said, not wanting to let go of her hand even though they were pushing me out of the room. “She’s okay, right? She’s just afraid.”

I sat outside her room on the fucking floor, elbows on my knees, my head in my hands, waiting for someone to talk to me about what the hell just happened. Half of me felt insanely relieved she woke up and was able to recall where she was going before the accident. But the other half of me was panicked as shit because they kicked me out of the room.

Hearing footsteps to my left, I looked up hoping to see a doctor, but instead… Two cops were walking down the hall.

A younger cop with an athletic build and mustache who had to be about mid-twenties stopped right in front of me. “Mr. Conover?”

My mind stuttered to a stop. I stared at him for a second, shocked that he was talking to me. “Yes?”

“We’d like to ask you to come down to the station. We’ve got a few questions.”

My pulse pounded in my ears as my eyes drifted over them. “What’s this about?”

His partner, an older cop with tired eyes, shifted his weight, looking uncomfortable. “You’ve had two romantic partners with faulty brake lines. Why don’t you tell us, Mr. Conover?”

Shock rocked into me.

Brakes?

I replayed his words in my head as I struggled to breathe.

That’s what caused her to crash? Her brakes didn’t work?

How the fuck…? What was the likelihood…? Stella…? I couldn't even form a full thought.

But as my eyes met theirs, the reality of the situation dawned on me: They thought I did it.

The older cop gave me a stern nod. “As of this moment, you’re a suspect in the attempted murder of Meredith Bennett, and the murder of a Ms. Stella Thompson.”

My heart hammered so hard in my chest it could break a rib. “What the fuck? Why the fuck would I–”

“Mr. Conover, we need you to come with us,” the younger cop interjected.

I shook my head. All the anger and frustration built up inside of me over the last twenty-four hours erupted out of me. “I’m not leaving. This has to wait. I’m not leaving her here.”

Cheryl popped her head out of Mer’s room to see what was causing the commotion.

The cops made eye-contact, silently communicating with each other, then the younger one sighed.

“Sir, you’re wanted for questioning. You need to come with us now. If you resist, we will be forced to arrest you for obstruction.”

Dread filled my body. This could not be happening. My head dropped back against the wall.