18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Tareq

I suck at making plans.

A few years back, when I joined the Voidstalkers, I was hoping to make it into a grand career. To climb through the ranks. When I tried to get promoted to squad leader, my superiors laughed at me. Told me to come back once I've shed all of my milk teeth.

Back then, I was angry. I'd just made it into the most elite armed force in the entire galaxy, and I felt like I'd be good at commanding people just because I had muscles and knew how to shoot a gun. I envied our captain's job of sitting back and giving orders.

I was stupid. A rookie that deserved to get punched, not given a promotion.

I thought I knew better than a person with decades of experience so one day, I ignored the captain's order on a mission, thinking my plan was better than his. Not only did I nearly die, but I almost got my squad mates killed, too.

It was a brutal wake-up call that brought me to my knees. I felt so bad I was ready to leave the force completely, but the very same squad members I'd just recklessly endangered talked me into staying. Then, to my surprise, the captain that I had clearly disobeyed, thinking I was smarter than him, patted my shoulder and welcomed me to the team.

Since then, I've never reapplied for that promotion. I realized I didn't want the crushing responsibility of making hard decisions that might get other people killed. That's why I'd insisted on going on this mission alone. If I fuck up, it'll be just my life in danger.

And look where it's gotten me. Again, I'm responsible for someone else. And this time, they're not even a trained professional who's chosen to be here.

After the Genixarians took Astra away, I spent an eternity agonizing over every single decision I'd made since signing up for this mission. I've made so many mistakes I wonder how I still call myself a Voidstalker when I'm such a miserable failure.

Even now, an innocent female is taking all of the risks while I sit back in the comfort of my cell. It might have been her idea and her choice, but that doesn't make me any less responsible if anything should happen to her.

"Nothing will happen to her," I mutter to myself, needing to hear it out loud. "She's clever, she won't fuck it up like I did." Clever, brave and beautiful. And angry with me, I think.

I'm not an expert on the female mind, but Astra acted differently toward me after we started planning our escape. Has she realized that anything that happens between us is pointless since the UGC will erase her memories before returning her home? Or is it something else?

She didn't seem too excited about the idea of going home. Or maybe that's just my wishful thinking. But…she didn't say she wanted to stay here with me either. Gah! How am I supposed to know what she's thinking about or what she wants?

The cell block door opens, the Genixarians are bringing her back. My hearts swell with relief at seeing her unharmed, then get crushed when my already fucked-up plan falls apart even more. I'd hoped they'd put her back into my cell, even if only for a short while, but they've locked her in with that primitive lizard monster.

I admit, I don't really register what's happening during the next few minutes very well. I take out the keycard, determined to get out of this cell and rescue Astra no matter what, but of course, I don't make it far. The fuckers activate my collar and send me stumbling to the floor.

I hate this fucking thing. Once I'm free, I'll destroy every single collar on this entire ship. Or perhaps I'll shove it up the Genixarian's asses. They don't have cunts or cocks, but I bet they have assholes.

I taste blood. I must have bitten my tongue while frantically trying to get up. I hope I didn't bite it off completely. Then again, perhaps then I'd finally keep my mouth shut and wouldn't endanger anyone with my poorly constructed plans.

The pain stops.

I groan, dazed. What's happening?

Someone screams. Not Astra, so I don't care.

Astra. I have to help her.

My head's ringing, but I ignore it and pull myself up. I scent blood but it's not my own. Not Astra's either, I think. Still, blood is not a good thing. I have to move.

I cling to the bars and focus on finding the keycard reader. There's a scuffle going on nearby, but I can't look. My body isn't functioning properly yet and if I lose focus, I'll drop the stupid card and all will be lost.

The machine gives a beep and the door opens. I stumble out using the door for balance, my legs not willing to carry me.

Stupid legs.

Bracing myself against the bars, I advance on the two Genixarians. One of them is my old buddy Gamma. His colleague Omicron lies on the floor in a pool of blood. Pity. I wanted to kill him myself.

I'm unarmed. Weakened by the collar torture they just put me through. I'm alone against two of them.

I don't give the tiniest shit.

I wouldn't be a member of the most elite squad in the entire galaxy if I couldn't take out two people on my own. Genixarians at that. They aren't fighters, none of them. They hide behind their gadgets and bodysuits, but they can't even dodge a fist to the face.

Gamma's neck snaps with a satisfying crack. I drop his body on the floor, jumping on the last remaining guard even as he raises the collar remote. His hand is shaking, but he manages to press the button at the same time as I lunge at him.

Pain shoots through me briefly, but then I land on top of him and knock the remote out of his hand. My head is spinning, darkness lurking in the corners of my vision, but I do not give in to it. I need to stay awake. For Astra.

I furiously claw at the guard's throat until he draws one last gurgling breath and stops moving. I'm covered in blood. The floor is covered in blood. Everything is covered in blood.

"Tareq?" Astra calls to me, her voice gentle as if talking to a crazed animal. Perhaps I'm nothing more than a crazed beast at this point. It's not like me to lose control in a fight but I also don't get shocked by collars on a daily basis. That shit can't be good for the brain.

I close my eyes and take a few deep breaths, collecting my thoughts. The plan went sideways, that's for sure, but it seems to have worked out in the end. Somehow.

Someone grunts and I jump to my feet, ready to fight. Has one of the guards survived? But it's not a guard that grunts and groans as he tries to get up. It's the lizard creature. He's covered in blood, too. Not his, though.

As I fight off the vertigo from getting up too quickly, I realize what happened. Instead of lunging himself at Astra, the lizard assaulted the guards. Crazy and desperate move, but it worked. He distracted them for long enough to allow me to get out of the cell and take care of the others.

That doesn't mean I trust him, though. He's somewhat intelligent, but still a primitive creature I can't communicate with. I rush closer and unlock the cell to get Astra out of there.

She doesn't run outside, but cautiously approaches the lizard instead. "Thank you for your help," she says, as if the creature could understand her. "Are you alright?"

The lizard lets out a ferocious growl, making me rush to Astra's side, ready to protect her in case he tries to attack. He doesn't attack, though, merely tugs on the collar around his neck, letting out another exasperated growl.

"Yeah, you and me both, brother," I smirk, repeating his motion. It's impossible not to hate this device.

"Can we take them off now?" Astra asks, her fingers tracing her own collar. "Or do we have to run before more guards show up?"

Since my vision has finally cleared and stopped spinning, I take stock of the situation. The Genixarians had comms, but they haven't used them to alert anyone. There's no alarm yet. "We have time," I say as I lean to pick up one of the remotes. It's slick with blood, but it should still work. "I'll show you how to remove the collar."

"Great. I guess I stole this for nothing then?" Astra asks with an uncertain smile, raising her own remote.

"We might not need more than one," I admit, "but you completed your part of the plan. I'm impressed." I mean it. I admire how brave and clever she is. "Maybe we can use yours since it's not covered in blood," I suggest.

She throws a disgusted glance at the mess all around us. "That's probably a good idea. Can you show me how to remove the collar? On him, maybe?" she asks, pointing at the lizardman. He flinches when he sees the remote in her hand but doesn't attack, looking at us expectantly instead.

I hesitate. "Are you sure this is a good idea? We can't communicate with him, can't fill him in on our plan." Not that we have much of a plan. "He could be…unpredictable."

"Tareq," Astra says, placing her hands on her hips as she scowls at me, "he's a slave who's more than ready to be rid of this dreadful collar. I know he's a primitive creature. But apparently, so am I," she giggles. "Are you going to leave me collared because I can be unpredictable?"

I don't have an answer to that.

She smirks again, victoriously this time. "Didn't think so. Quit yapping and show me how to remove this thing."

There's no arguing with this female. I quit "yapping" and show her the button sequence she needs to press to disable the collar and then how to release the tiny hooks that hold the collar on. The lizard creature kneels, waiting patiently throughout the whole procedure, his only movement the swiping of his thick tail from side to side in anticipation.

My own tail wishes to curl around Astra's waist and pull her closer, but I don't let it. This is not the time. She's still angry with me. Not to mention, she's going to go home and forget all about me and…dammit! My tail has wrapped itself around her possessively.

She stares up at me, surprise evident in her eyes, before smiling appreciatively. And…I'm lost. All thoughts of staying away from her instantly forgotten.

The lizardman's collar falls off, rattling to the floor. He lets out a victorious roar and starts stomping and clawing at the device. I ignore him, my mind solely focused on Astra. Should I tell her to stay? But what if she doesn't want to?

"On your knees, my tiger," she says, her smile growing wider.

"Huh?"

She chuckles. "I want to take your collar off, but you're too tall for me to reach it. You have to kneel down."

"Oh. Right." I kneel before her, looking up at her smiling face. The smile I want to keep seeing every day for the rest of my life. How can I let her leave?

The tip of her tongue peeks out of her mouth as she concentrates on entering the right sequence on the remote. Once she's satisfied, she leans closer, putting her arms around my neck to reach the mechanism in the back of the collar. Of course, this means that my face is pressed against her chest but I'm not about to complain.

She makes quick work of unlocking the collar, and relief surges through me as she takes it off. Relief that is immediately smothered by disappointment when she straightens up again and steps back. Away from me.

"Please, stay," I whisper before I can stop myself.

She blinks in confusion, her cheeks turning pink. "I… What do you mean, Tareq? Don't you need to go and signal your friends?"

"Yes, of course. But… I mean…" I hesitate. I'll be devastated if she refuses me but I know I'll hate myself for the rest of my life if I don't ask. "Don't go back to Earth. Stay here with me."