Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

E linor woke up at her usual time of six o’clock with something of a start. It took her a moment to realize where she was and that nothing demanded her attention until at least seven when she’d offered to meet Mrs. Hepworth in the drawing room to help with the children, who would be excitedly opening their Christmas stockings.

She lay back against the mound of pillows and wiggled her toes under the warm weight of her many blankets. A fire had already been lit and the room was warm despite the frost patterned windowpanes. It was still dark outside and so quiet Elinor couldn’t believe how close they were to Millcastle where the noise never stopped.

Her thoughts flew back to her last encounter with Mr. Totton and her sense of contentment dissipated. He’d been disappointed in her. He’d offered to be her friend, but unsettled by Dr. Nash’s remarks, she’d kept him at arm’s length, which he hadn’t deserved. She’d also forgotten that they were in his employer’s home and that his conduct and hers would be under observation.

She pressed a hand to her now hot cheek. And she’d propositioned him! How could she have been so stupid? Her delight at being in unfamiliar surroundings had clouded her judgement and might have caused him harm. She got out of bed, grabbed her shawl and headed for the connecting door between their suites. The key was on her side, so she turned it and went in.

The room was in darkness, the bed unoccupied. She jumped as someone cleared their throat.

“Good morning, Mrs. Smith.”

She gasped as he spoke from the chair by the fire. He was already dressed and reading a book which he set aside to observe her more closely.

She tightened her grip on the ends of the shawl. “I… wanted to apologize.”

“For what?”

“My overly familiar behavior last night.”

He removed his spectacles and carefully folded them before placing them in his waistcoat pocket. “No apology is needed.”

“I was too forward—and in your employer’s house?—”

He spoke over her. “Please don’t distress yourself. I was at fault. I was the one who started it by offering to accompany you to your room.” He paused. “That was unfair of me.”

She realized she was trembling. “I promise I’ll behave myself from now on, sir.”

“Elinor…” He rose to his feet and approached her. “Your behavior is always impeccable.”

He curved his hand around her neck and she leaned into him. “I was presumptious,”

“No,” he said softly, dropping a kiss on the top of her head. “You were not.”

She pressed her palm over his heart and simply let his strength and calmness overwhelm her.

“Perhaps we should simply admit we are out of practice in communicating with those we care about,” he murmured.

Elinor managed to smile against his waistcoat. “And forgive each other?”

“That would mean a lot to me.”

She raised her chin and met his gaze. “I’m sorry.”

“As am I.” He kissed her properly this time, only drawing back when she reciprocated. “Shall we start again? Happy Christmas, Elinor.”

“And the same to you, sir, I mean, Thomas,” Elinor said, still somewhat shakily, but he didn’t seem to mind. “I do have a gift for you, if you’d like to receive it now?”

He nodded and she went back into her own room to pick up the present she’d hidden in the wardrobe. She’d wrapped it in brown paper and tied it with string, a piece of holly was the only decoration.

He took the parcel and looked at her. “May I open it?”

“Please.”

He sat down and unwrapped the paper, his gaze downward as he revealed a sturdy knitted brown scarf with matching gloves.

“Thank you,” he said, looking up at her. “This is just what I needed.” He cleared his throat. “I like the thought that something you’ve knitted will keep me warm and be with me when you are not.”

Elinor pressed her hand to her cheek. “I hadn’t thought of it like that.”

“Will you help me try it on?” He stood and offered the scarf to her.

He bent his head slightly so that she could arrange it around his neck to her satisfaction, her fingers slightly trembling as she tucked one end through the other.

“There.” She glanced shyly up at him. “You look very fine.”

He leaned forward and kissed her very gently on the lips. “Thank you, my dear.”

“Happy Christmas, Thomas,” she murmured and kissed him back.

“I have something for you.” He paused. “I intended to give it to you privately as I knew you wouldn’t want a fuss.”

He moved away from her and took something from his luggage. It was square and quite large. “It’s rather bulky. I’ll put it on the floor for you.”

Elinor tried to remember the last time someone had given her a present as she sank down onto the floor and enthusiastically attacked the string.

“Oh…” She reached out to touch the smooth wood. “What on earth?”

He crouched down opposite, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he smiled at her. “When I was inquiring at the dressmakers about something for you to wear, I happened to notice that this was for sale. I believe it came in lieu of a debt from an older lady who is now deceased.”

Elinor opened the lid of the inlaid mahogany sewing box and gazed at the satin lined interior, which was filled with everything a needlewoman might ever want.

“It came with its contents,” Thomas said. “I hope you don’t object.”

“Not at all.” Elinor picked up the pincushion, which was studded with pins and smelled of lavender. “It’s wonderful.” She swallowed hard. “What a kind and thoughtful gift.”

He looked relieved. “I’m not the kind of man to indulge in flashy presents, I thought this would be… useful.”

“I’ll keep it all my life,” she assured him. “I couldn’t have asked for anything better.”

They beamed at each other, all the earlier tension somehow forgotten. The clock on the mantelpiece chimed the quarter hour and Elinor rose to her feet.

“I have to get ready to meet Mrs. Hepworth in the dining room to help with the children.”

Thomas rose, too. “I’ll put the box in your room for you.”

“Thank you.” She rushed back into her bedroom to put up her hair and went down the main staircase. She could already hear the excited chatter of young voices coming from the breakfast table where she knew Mrs. Hepworth had placed the Christmas stockings. It reminded her of her youth when both her parents had been alive and the festive season had been a magical, unforgettable, thing.

Squaring her shoulders, she stepped into the dining room to a sea of excited faces. She was pleased to see that Mrs. Hepworth had invited the staff’s children as well.

“Good morning, Mrs. Smith!” her hostess called out to her. “Have you ever seen such a joyous Christmas morning?”

“Never,” Elinor assured her as she picked up a painted spinning top that had fallen off the table and gave it back to its owner.

Mrs. Hepworth came over. She had Alice on one side and Nora, Mrs. Nash’s daughter, on the other, both of them clutching new peg dolls that looked remarkably like their owners.

“The trick will be to persuade them all to stop playing long enough to eat something, perhaps you can help me with that?”

“I have little experience with children, ma’am, but I will do my best.”

Mrs. Hepworth nodded. “Perhaps you might call me Alice? I’d much prefer it.”

“And you must call me Elinor.” They smiled at each other. “I suspect once they start bringing in the food, some of the children will be hungry enough to eat and the others will follow their example.”

“I do hope you’re right. I’ll go and hurry the kitchen staff along. We don’t want the parents coming down to this mayhem on Christmas morning.”

The day passed swiftly, as she helped Alice organize games and treats for the children and exclaimed over the presents exchanged under the Christmas tree. Elinor was surprised to receive a beautiful lace collar and an embroidered handkerchief from her hostess when she’d only knitted her a pair of warm mittens. Mr. Hepworth, who was far cannier than most people realized, called across to her after she thanked his wife profusely.

“Will you make me a pair of those mittens, Mrs. Smith?”

“Yes, of course, sir.”

“Good. I can’t have Mr. Totton showing me up.” He winked at her.

By the time they sat down for dinner the children were exhausted and had been taken up to the nursery or home to bed, leaving the adults to enjoy the long, formal dinner in relative peace.

Elinor came down the stairs, aware of the rustling of her stiff new petticoat under her borrowed silk gown and the brush of curls against her cheeks courtesy of the maid’s attention to her hair. Mr. Totton—Thomas—awaited her in the hall, his gaze riveted on her as she came down the stairs.

“You look… beautiful,” he said as he took her gloved hand and kissed it.

“Good Lord,” a loud voice behind Elinor almost made her jump as Mr. Hepworth approached. “I almost didn’t recognize you, lass. Talk about hiding your light under a bushel. You’re very pretty indeed.”

“Don’t embarrass her, Elijah.” Alice came to claim her husband, her amused gaze on Elinor. “I knew that gown would look well on you, my dear.”

“And you were right.” Elinor curtsied. “Thank you again for letting me borrow such a treasure.”

Mr. Hepworth looked at his wife. “You should let her keep it. I’ll buy you another one.”

“I intend to.” Alice smiled at him. “It really does suit her.” She turned to Mr. Totton. “After dinner we will be going to Viscount Grafton-Wesley’s house where there will be an informal dance for anyone who cares to participate.”

They moved on, leaving Elinor with Thomas. She looked up at him.

“I feel as if I’m living in a fairytale.”

“Then perhaps you should simply enjoy it?” He raised his eyebrows. “We both work hard all year round, don’t we deserve the occasional day off?”

“Perhaps we do.”

“There’s no ‘perhaps’ about it.” He took her hand and placed it on his sleeve. “If there is dancing, will you dance with me?”

“I haven’t danced since—” She sighed. “My father’s wedding.”

“Did she treat you badly, your stepmother?”

“Yes,” Elinor said simply. “Sometimes I think she hated me. She questioned my legitimacy and taught her children to treat me with contempt.”

“She had children from a previous marriage?”

“Three. Two girls and a boy.”

“Whom she wished to advance in your place,” Mr. Totton suggested. “It’s not an uncommon story, but I wonder why your father didn’t put a stop to it.”

“He wasn’t himself,” Elinor said. “After my mother died, he seemed to give up. He only lived for three years after his second marriage. After he died and my brother went into the military, I was all alone with my stepmother. She stopped me visiting my relatives, she wouldn’t allow me to socialize, and she treated me like a servant.”

“I’m so sorry, my dear.”

Elinor looked up into his kind gaze. “I don’t know why I’m telling you all this now, it must be the champagne.”

He gently cupped her cheek. “We’re friends, remember? I wish you’d tell me her name so that I could pay her a visit.”

“And do what exactly?” Elinor asked. “In the eyes of the world, she has done nothing wrong. I am the one who ran away and besmirched the family name.”

“Has she made any effort to find you?” Thomas asked.

“Not that I am aware of.” Elinor searched his face. “Why do you ask?”

“It’s just that you’re obviously from a wealthy and probably titled family,” he said quickly. “Such persons normally merit finding.”

“If she wants me back, she’ll claim I stole something and will have me tried as a thief.”

He was watching her carefully. “Did you steal anything?”

She raised her chin. “I only took what was mine—bequeathed to me by my own mother.”

“She’ll dispute that, of course,” he said. “Have you ever thought of exposing her for the fraud she is?”

“To what end?”

He frowned. “Forgive me if this is none of my business, but surely you are set to inherit something?” He paused. “Or was what happened to make you flee so dire that such considerations seemed meaningless?”

He was coming perilously near a truth Elinor had hidden from for years. She looked away from him.

“Perhaps we should go into dinner and continue our conversation at a later date?”

He blinked. “Yes, of course. I apologize. Mrs. Hepworth will be wondering what has become of us.”