Chapter 12

When the waiter moves away, we're left alone once more.

This could be the second worst conversation I've ever had in my life — the first being right after Charlize had her lips wrapped around my dick. I don't think anything could quite capture that kind of awkwardness ever again.

"So how did you and Mum meet?" Charlize looks down at the table and I wish she wouldn't.

This isn't the strong woman I remember from the other night. Or when she snooped around my home, stealing the jumper she's now wearing.

"We knew each other from university." I feel the lump forming in my throat. "We got to talking one day and she told me about your grandmother and how she put sanctions on her inheritance, using you as an excuse."

"Me?" She points to her chest.

"Yes. Stating that the funds should be held for your university tuition, and since your mother couldn't fight her way out of a paper bag — much less argue with your grandmother — she let her win. Until she came up with a plan."

"One that involved a fake marriage to a wealthy man?"

"Something like that. I honestly thought it would bring the two of you closer, it's one of the reasons that I agreed. I knew you'd been from pillar to post, between London and Australia, for years. I thought it would be a more stable life for you at that vulnerable age."

She stares at me. "I never knew you cared so much."

I clear my throat. "I was appalled when she insisted you stay at boarding school. Personally, I hated Eaton when I was there. I knew we weren't a real family, and I wasn't pretending to be anything less. I'm deeply sorry, Charlize, for any part I had in making you feel more isolated."

She swallows hard, her eyes glazing over. I'm such an asshole.

"It's fine." Her voice wavers just slightly. "You thought it would bring me and my mother closer, but all it did was drive us further apart. She couldn't wait to ship me off to an all-girl's school. She told me I should feel privileged, as she never had the opportunity for such a fine education — all of which I now know is a lie."

"I truly think that she believed she was doing the right thing by you."

"By running off with her lesbian lover to Ibiza? That's where she was before she…"

I feel like such an ass. I never should have brought this up. Charlize may have not gotten along with any of the women in her family, but that doesn't mean it's not still hurtful.

"No, Charlize. By giving you an education of the highest calibre. Buying you things was her way of showing that she did care about you, even if she didn't know how to show it."

Her eyes are frosty when they meet mine. "You don't have to sugarcoat it, I'm a big girl now. I can take the knocks. I know that my entire existence was an inconvenience to her, and to my grandmother. I get it."

"That isn't true. Your grandmother was set in her ways. She couldn't see past her own nose."

"And what's my mum's excuse? Oh, right. A by-product of a loveless upbringing with too much expectation. Come on, Alistair. You can only use that excuse for so long."

I shake my head. "She cared deep down. I promise you that."

"Yet you fought over my education? She didn't relent, that says a lot."

"We fought because I didn't believe that you should be in boarding school, yes. She reminded me that our marriage was contractual and to keep my nose out of her business. She was a headstrong woman, something I can see in you, too. She thought she was doing the right thing."

She rolls her eyes. "Please don't compare me to that woman. I barely knew her."

I don't want to make this more painful for Charlize, in fact that's the last thing I want. But I truly believe that Abigail was just misunderstood.

"Do you remember at the funeral? When your grandmother made a scene?"

Her lips tremble slightly. "How could I forget? She just wanted to dig her heels in. Pretend like she was a good person in front of everyone. She just wanted to control me like everybody else, and she got her way."

"Believe me when I say I'm truly sorry." I mean every fucking word and wish I could turn back time. "It's one of the things I regret the most."

She looks at me like I'm a complete stranger to her, and in a lot of ways I guess I am. "What about last night?" she challenges. "Do you regret that too?"

I have the decency to look away, busying myself with my napkin. "I think it's best if we never talk about that again, don't you?" I look up when she doesn't answer.

When I have her attention, she smirks. "I don't know. It was the most attention I've had from you in years."

"You still think this is funny?"

She takes another leisurely sip of her champagne, in no hurry to answer me. "It is pretty funny when you think about it. What are we going to do? Lie and say it didn't feel good?"

My throat thickens. My heart races.

She can't do this to me.

I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't attracted to her. That her body was physically impossible for me to stay away from. Her beautiful lips, wrapped around my cock, is still the sweetest thing I've ever seen. Yet I have to sit here and pretend that I'm not affected by her.

That if she wasn't Charlize Prescott — the one woman I can't have —I would've had my way with her over and over and over again.

My cock aches in my pants and I'm disgusted with myself. This surely isn't normal.

So, I decide to talk to her like an adult. She is one, after all. "I never said it didn't feel good, Charlize. But given the circumstances, we can't continue." Does she want to continue?

As if hearing my thoughts, she answers, "Why not?"

I wet my lips, unable to take the dryness any longer. "Aside from the obvious?"

"Let's just say that I'm not Charlize Prescott, and you're not Alistair Devereaux, what then?"

"You're playing with fire, and you know it."

"Answer the question."

"You always did know how to push my buttons, Charlize."

"My friends call me Charli, just so you know."

"We're not friends."

She furrows her brow. "No? What are we exactly? Since you don't like me calling you Daddy."

Every time she says that fucking word… I want to take her over my lap and spank her ass.

The thought arouses me; my heart thudding in my chest as I try to remain calm by taking deep breaths.

I crack my neck, hoping I'll get through this damn dinner and back to the world that I know. The one where I rule and nobody gets a look in. The walls I've built are so high up that nobody dares try to get over them. And I like it that way. I didn't become this monster overnight.

And now that I'm fantasising about her, I'm sure as shit going to hell.

"I swear to God, Charlize."

"You wanted it as much as I did," she says. "Admit it."

I fold my arms across my chest. "I admit nothing."

"Because you're a coward, Alistair?"

"I'm a coward because I made a mistake and you keep pressing the issue?" I smirk. "That's what it was, a mistake. One that I have no intention of repeating."

She stares at me for a long moment. We're momentarily interrupted by our entrees.

Once they're set down and the waiter moves, we avoid looking at one another for a few awkward moments. Then she says, "You're such a fucking liar."

I stare at her, my lips parted.

Nobody in my life speaks to me this way. If they did, they'd be less a limb quick smart.

Nobody in my office would utter anything except platitudes. I'm deeply respected by everyone in the industry I work, and my employees and long-time staff — Hell, by people I don't even know but. But to hear this? It only makes my blood boil all the more.

"Why do you say that?"

She leans forward. "I had your cock in my mouth, and you loved every second of it. Nothing you say or do will tell me otherwise."

My dick jerks in my pants. She's a sassy little thing and it turns me on. It shouldn't. I should get up, walk away from this table and never see her again. But my feet don't fucking move.

"You just love being right, don't you?"

"So I am?"

"Touching my dick doesn't make us close. I paid you for sex. That's what it was. A transaction." I mean to upset her. To make her understand. To make her go the fuck away. If she leaves now, then I'm off the hook. Like the goddamn coward she told me I was.

She laughs. It would be a pretty sound if it weren't directed at me. "Wow. You just love your ‘Prescott transactions', don't you, old boy? Maybe I should get you a plaque made. You had indecent dealings with two Prescott women. Bravo. A real high achiever."

"I never touched your mother. She was into women, remember?"

Heat rises in her eyes. "But you did touch me."

"Charlize. You need to understand something." I wave a finger between us. "This. It's never going to happen. Not ever. So whatever sick little fantasy you have in your head about us you may as well extinguish now. I can't do it. Not with you."

Her eyes wander down my body and I've no clue why she's torturing me like this. It's like she knows all my weaknesses and she's quite willing and able to exploit them.

"I bet if I checked right now, you'd have a dick as hard as a rod."

I swallow hard. She's not wrong. My dick strains against my zipper as I try to stay focussed on anything but her smart mouth using foul language.

"Clearly you know noth—" I trail off when I feel movement between my legs. Glancing down, I see Charlize's foot in my crotch. Somehow she kicked off her shoe and she's now massaging my dick with her toes. "Fuck."

"So, I have a proposition." She keeps at it and when my hand clamps down on her ankle, I know I've got her attention.

"Stop it."

"Can't you just hear me out?"

"Take your foot out of my lap."

"Make me." She wiggles the ball of her foot against my wood and I almost come in my pants.

I steel my jaw, clenching my teeth so hard I hear the grind. I want to close my eyes and let her have at it. Somehow, I compose myself.

"Charlize."

"Don't overthink it." Even without her foot against my dick, her voice alone is like foreplay. "It's so much better when you just go with it."

"Why are you doing this?"

She stops her rubbing, but her foot still stays pressed up against my hardened length. "Because I know you want it. As much as you deny it, I know that's not true."

"What's your proposition?" Why am I even indulging her in this?

A small smile plays against her lips like she's won. I guess she thinks she has me all figured out. She's in for a rude awakening.

"I could come work for you."

I stare at her. "Work for me?"

"Uh, huh."

"What exactly do you think you could do for me?" I say, but I don't mean it as a challenge.

Still, she flicks her hair over one shoulder as she leans in closer, dropping her voice. "I can type."

I laugh. Type?

"Right."

She frowns. "What were you expecting me to say? That I'd be your sex slave?"

"Remember when I told you not to push my buttons?"

"Remember when I told you that I don't play by other people's rules?"

She's never, ever uttered those words to me, but I play along. "Your point?"

"Well, you made it clear that you didn't like my new occupation."

I lean forward in my chair, thus her foot presses harder against my cock. "No. I made it clear no man was going to pay you to fuck."

She bites her lip as she finally takes her knife and fork and begins to eat. Her fucking foot is still in my lap as she breaks off a small piece of seabass and puts it to her mouth.

"Mmm, delicious."

"Charlize?"

Her eyes wander to my face. "Yeah?"

"You're not going to let another man fuck you for money, are you?"

She's playing a dangerous game when she shrugs. "I need money for a new place, so I guess I'll have to see about that."

My anger boils, my fists clenching on the table as I slam one down. The cutlery jostles and she jumps ever so slightly.

I know she's not afraid of me, but she'd do well to pay attention. I won't tolerate this for a single second.

"You. Are. Not. Going. To. Fuck. For. Money. Charlize."

She narrows her brow. "Funny. I don't remember asking you for permission."

We have a stare off and I don't know how I have the restraint. "I should put you over my knee for that." It's only a mutter, but she hears it.

Her lips twitch. "Let's play a new game."

I know I asked for this, but now that she's taking control of this situation, I don't like the unease that creeps through me.

"I don't play games."

She takes another bite, her eyes never leaving mine. "Oh, you'll want to play this game, Daddy."