Chapter 9

Agnes,

I am sorry to hear about your accident. I’ve scheduled us for a meeting at 6 this afternoon to discuss your future at this school.

Ephraim

Surely, no one else needed so many meetings with the chancellor in only a week. If they had a three-strike rule, I was toast.

Someone on the other side of the wall, seemingly Lindy, yelled out. “Fuck me harder!”

“Shut up!” I screamed back, chucking the papers into the fire, which hissed in appreciation.

Unfortunately, my outburst had no effect, and the pounding continued as I crawled back in bed. I tried to distract myself by picking up the crochet hook. After an hour of practice, I almost had it, but I stopped to pull on my clothes from the night before to track down Ephraim’s office.

I tried to tie my foot back on like Stacy had it, but each time I tried to balance on it, it would flop to the side. Crawling across campus didn’t necessarily sound like a great time, but at that point, I was tired and thoroughly maxed out on embarrassment.

But I was spared because, as soon as I pushed my door open at 6 o’clock, I found Ephraim’s office on the other side. Ephraim was standing just over the threshold, offering me his hand. “Right on time.”

He helped me over to a chair in front of his desk. When Ephraim moved back around to his own seat, I realized Professor Faun was sitting in the chair next to mine.

“I’m very sorry to hear about your accident,” Ephraim said, still through the vulture’s mouth. He grunted as he sat in his seat and placed his elbows on the desk.

Fear shot into my stomach. He was being too delicate with me. Was this my dismissal? My eyes went to the black door behind him. “No, it’s—um . . . I’m fine. I was just being dumb. It won’t happen again.”

“You’re right,” he said, and my heart sank.

“Please, sir,” I began, my voice so quiet he didn’t even seem to hear it as he continued.

“So, we’re going to be taking some precautions.”

I’d been avoiding Professor Faun with my eyes, but they flicked his way as I asked, “Precautions?”

“The creature that attacked you has tasted your blood, which means it isn’t likely to leave you alone without some very serious convincing.”

“You want to teach me how to . . . fight it?”

Ephraim let out a surprised chuckle. “Good heavens, no. I’d never recommend physically confronting anything in purgatory, especially anything that could mean you harm. But now that it’s tasted your blood, it will, likely, do anything it can to get to you until you lose the remaining life that’s still inside you. It might try and trick you, lure you, lull you, anything.”

I grimaced. “I don’t know if it could lull anything.”

“You’d be surprised.” His voice wavered, and I sensed he was remembering something painful. “Anyway, it is usually standard to allow students out of campus once they reach Stage 4 invisibility, usually at the end of the first year or two, depending on the student. But it seems that you no longer have the luxury of time, so I’ve asked Professor Faun here to give you some extra tutoring to speed up your education.”

My face warmed. “I swear I really have no interest in going near the gate again.”

“That’s not a risk we’re willing to take. There are fates in this world far outside your ability to comprehend. So, do forgive me when I tell you that you have no choice in the matter.”

Stealing a look at Professor Faun, I realized I wasn’t the only one who wasn’t given a choice. His stiff expression had me desperately wishing I wasn’t about to be imposed on him even more than I had been. Despite his professional demeanor, I could tell the prospect of tutoring me was—at best—inconvenient.

“Once you can go fully invisible, the threat will be neutralized, so just hang on until then. Professor Faun here has an opening at six o’clock in the evenings.”

“Which evenings?”

“All of them.”

I balked. “Every day?”

“Just the weekdays.”

“Does that not seem like overkill?”

“There is no such thing. We need to cram in a year’s worth of education as quickly as possible—and trust me, it’s for your own good.”

I sighed. “Okay, fine.”

Ephraim clasped his hands together. “Excellent.”

Pushing myself up by the arms of the chair, I prepared to crawl back to the door to properly process the embarrassment in solitude. Not only did I need to take up extra classes due to my own stupidity, but I was imposing myself on the one teacher I could barely look at without getting flustered.

“Wait, wait, I have something else for you.” Ephraim leaned down behind his desk, emerging with a beautiful cane etched with an intricate weaving pattern resembling Stacy’s root walls.

“Whoa,” I said as he placed the cane on the desk in front of me.

“It’s yours.”

I lifted it, feeling the glossy wood under my fingers as I balanced it on the floor next to me and used it to lift myself onto my good foot.

“Thanks,” I breathed, glad I wouldn’t have to crawl around campus indefinitely.

“I didn’t make it.”

Confused, my eyes went to Professor Faun, but he put his hands up in deflection.

“Oh,” I began to say, but Ephraim spared me.

“Very well. It’s been nice to see you, dear. I do hope you adjust well. If you ever need to talk, you know how to find me.”

“Right, thanks.”

I left without acknowledging Professor Faun. I wasn’t sure what to say to him. Sorry? Hopefully he was aware that I detested the arrangement as much as he did, though doubtlessly for different reasons.

I tested out my new cane in the dorm hallways, but as I walked through the maze of doors, I discovered something new. There was a bathroom, which felt redundant, since, from what I could tell, it wasn’t necessary. But I investigated nonetheless.

Upon entering, I found something more akin to a locker room, with old beat-up lockers and metal benches. And farther on, I found what would probably be better described as a bathhouse. There were a handful of cubicles, each housing a large tub, big enough for half a dozen people to sit comfortably. Some tubs bubbled, and some were still. One had the curtain pulled, and breathy noises came from the other side. But at least this couple was trying to be subtle, unlike my neighbors.

I found an empty tub and walked in, admiring the table of goodies. Each had a water dispenser, cups, and an array of dried leaves and fruit wrapped in mesh bundles, seemingly to add to the bath water.

Having nothing better to do, I selected a bundle that smelled rich and floral and tossed it into the tub, instantly filling the small space with the scent. I pulled the curtain and stripped down. I wasn’t concerned with my nudity, but I didn’t want to accidentally invite any potential guests.

I sat on the edge of the tub and unwrapped my foot, then left it on the seafoam green tiles next to my cane as I sank into the water. It was so warm a groan leaked from my lips before I could stop myself.

A splash lapped against me, interrupting my meditation. When I opened my eyes, I found Rigel submerged in the water next to me.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” he said.

I was about to rebuke his claim but then I realized he’d clearly had enough time to find me, remove all of his clothes, and get in the tub.

So, instead, I gritted my teeth. “Go away.”

“Would you be any more receptive if I asked how you were feeling? I heard about your little accident.” He reached across me and grabbed my foot, lifting it for inspection.

I snatched it out of his hand. “Pardon you, that is still technically a part of my body.”

With his hands up, he scooted farther from me. “Understood.”

“Why the hell are you even in here?”

“I’m making you an offer.” The bundle of herbs floated by his elbow, and he snatched it up and gave it a big sniff. “And I love lavender verbena.”

“Spit it out, then.”

He set the bundle adrift before leaning toward me and dropping his voice. “I’m assuming since your little accident, you haven’t had the opportunity to visit the archive.”

“Genius level deduction as per usual.”

He continued, unfazed by my jab. “Excellent. Since I’m assuming you’ve cleared your schedule for the night, how would you feel about meeting me in the archive?”

“What’s in it for me?”

“I know something you want to know.”

I scoffed. “Unlikely.”

“And I have a sneaking suspicion you have a piece of information I need in return.” When I didn’t look convinced, he relented. “We both need to go for class anyway. What’s the harm?”

“You could do something weird to me.”

“And, what, risk expulsion? Unlikely,” he said.

“I suppose, I guess I just don’t get it.”

“You will.” He tapped the tile next to my shoulder before pushing himself out of the water.

“Wait,” I said, turning but keeping my eyes pointedly above his collarbones as he toweled off. “How did you even get in this dorm? You’re not an Iudex.”

His grin turned wolfish as he dropped the towel on the floor and pulled on his boxers. “I’ve been staying with a friend.”

It took the lilt in his voice to uncover the well-buried memory from the night before.

I pointed at him. “You!”

His eyebrows shot up. “Impressed?”

“You’re the reason I can’t get any damn sleep.”

“Welcome to communal living.” He pulled his black boxers back on and ran his fingers through his dripping hair.

I splashed the water up at him, which soaked into his clothes. “Please tell me you’re leaving after this.”

“Why would I do that?” he asked, clearly amused with himself. “I’m so refreshed now.”

“I have had the absolute worst day. Can you at least keep the screaming to a minimum?”

“I’ll ask, but Lindy’s a hard lady to bargain with.”

“I hate you.”

“See you at midnight.”

He disappeared around the curtain, and I heard water drip off him all the way back to the hall, leaving me to stew in my irritation.

After a painfully slow walk to the Custos dorm, I tapped my cane against enough windows to track Arlie down and convince her to grab some dinner with me.

“You’re not dead,” she announced as she ran out of the dormitory, still pulling on her shoes.

“In a sense.”

“Nice stick,” she said, leaning down to admire it. “Did you make it while you were in hiding?”

“No, Ephraim just gave it to me.”

“It looks like someone made it by hand.”

We went to grab a bite to eat, and I got a few minutes to chat with her before Blair finally sniffed her out.

“Glad to see you’re still kickin’,” he said, sliding into the booth and winding an arm around Arlie’s shoulders.

“Too soon,” I said before popping a blackberry into my mouth.

He laughed. “Honestly, I’m jealous. I wish I could kick as far as I can throw.”

I picked up my cane and whacked him under the table, making him practically jump into Arlie’s lap. “Easy there, cowgirl. It’s just a joke.”

“Don’t tease her. She has a school-mandated weapon now!” Arlie said, wrapping her arms around him with faux protectiveness.

I took a bite of buttered toast before saying, “Listen to your girlfriend. She’s smarter than you.”

“Who said we were official?” Blair asked, exchanging a look with Arlie.

“What? Was saving me from a beast not enough of a bonding experience for you guys?”

“I did no such saving. I give all the glory to this gal’s razor tongue and the fact that Professor Faun never sleeps.”

“He never sleeps?” I asked, trying not to sound too interested as I played with the food scraps on my plate.

“Not since I’ve been here.” Blair leaned across the table and pointed out the window I was leaning against. “The teacher quarters are attached to their classrooms, and that light never goes out.”

The information was so benign, but I couldn’t help but feel an odd flutter at the barest implication. The idea of him awake all night, in his private room, even in the abstract, was oddly thrilling. But I cleared my throat, trying to dismiss my interest before it could set off alarm bells.

“Weird,” I said, eyeing the sole golden rectangle of light that stood out in the dim twilight. “Anyway, he’s going to have to honor of tutoring me every weekday to make sure this doesn’t happen again.”

Their eyes went wide.

“That sucks,” Arlie said.

“I don’t know.” Blair smirked. “I know a lot of students here who would love an opportunity to get him alone.”

I winced. “Don’t be disgusting.”

“I didn’t say they’d be successful,” he said. “There’s a reason Ephraim isn’t concerned about it. This guy doesn’t even register our existence most days. He’s barely present behind the eyes, much less plotting to catch any student tail. So, if you were hoping for a bit of action, you’re probably out of luck.”

“I’m good,” I said, keeping my gaze low, lest the small pang of disappointment show in my eyes.

It was a good thing he wasn’t some creep sniffing around students, but some part of me was still let down.

“So, what do you lovely ladies say? Want to get drinks to pregame for tonight?”

I physically shrank away from the idea. “Oh, I don’t think so.”

“Maybe your head will get ripped off this time, and they’ll make you one of those spinning trays like Professor Faun has.” I leveled a glare at him, and he groaned. “It’s a joke. Lighten up.”

“Hilarious. You guys have fun. I think I’ll turn in early.”

I was trying to keep up with the leg jokes, but despite my best efforts, my appetite for prodding was low. I wasn’t sure how much I could tolerate before I became distinctly unpleasant to be around.

Alas, Blair wasn’t through with me.

“What if I promised almost no one would be weird about the whole leg thing?”

“My disinterest still stands,” I said with a sigh. It occurred to me that refusing might permanently write me out of the social scene, so I tacked on a sly smile. “Even though I can’t stand anymore.”

That earned me relieved chuckles as the tension dissipated. They settled back into planning the evening, and I chose to check out until they got up.

“Last chance,” Arlie offered, seeming genuinely hopeful.

Bless her.

I waved them off. “You kids have fun.”

While tempted to be irritated at Arlie for her taste in men, I understood that, in some strange, deep part of myself, she was sick with something I couldn’t cure. My jealousy didn’t lie in her preferences but in the reciprocation and availability she took for granted.

The fact that the only person on campus I felt drawn to was so beyond consideration felt less like being unlucky and more antithetical. Like behind the veil in my mind was someone so hollow and vile the only option was self-destruction, like a snake eating its own tail.

I loitered in the dining hall until the animals went to roost, and the students snuck off to the dark corners of campus to socialize.

I took my time tightening my foot straps before getting up. It pinched into my skin, but I didn’t want to mess with it any more than strictly necessary.

I limped to the library in the dark, finding it mostly empty except for clusters of students lingering in the desks around the pool. They didn’t look at me as I passed them on my way to the archive entrance, a staircase that wound down along the back wall.

Once I hit the bottom step, a long, winding catacomb stretched out before me. Books covered the walls, every inch of them. A few feet above my head where the tunnel rounded off, spines stared down at me, seemingly kept in place by sheer will, as if gravity didn’t work normally below the surface.

I followed arrows pointing me toward different letters of the alphabet, trying to make sense of the layout. But the longer I searched, the more confused I got. The way these books were set up made no sense.

After a long stretch of walking through different tunnels, I gave in and plucked a random book off the shelf by my head and read the cover.

Prescott, Tiffany

1901–1949

When I flipped it open, I found a detailed description of their entire life’s story, from random details of their home birth to why their marriage nearly fell apart. It felt invasive to see the gory details of someone’s life laid bare.

“Is it a good read?” someone asked from behind me, making me lose the grip on my cane, which clattered loudly to the stone floor.

The book toppled down after it, landing face down between me and the lurker.

When they bent down to scoop up the book, the light revealed them to be Rigel. His height precluded his face from the light, casting his features in shadow, making him look even more ghoulish than usual.

“Do you just enjoy being creepy?” I breathed.

“We’re literally ghosts, Agnes. We might as well embrace it.”

I gripped the edge of the shelf next to me to keep my balance as I snatched my cane off the floor. “And to think people don’t think you belong in your house.”

“People think that?”

Glancing up at him, I found only the barest shine of his eyes distinctly visible above the neck. But I didn’t need to see him to hear the smirk in his voice. “You’re not quite as . . . enthusiastic as the rest of them.”

“I didn’t know being obnoxious was that big of an indicator of punishment. I would have thought the opposite.”

“Maybe they only think you’re not obnoxious because they’re not Lindy’s neighbors.”

“Are you going to defend my honor, then?”

I scrunched my nose, leaning against the bookshelf next to me to give my sore shoulder a break. “If you guys open a window, I have no doubt the entire campus will find out organically.”

“Noted.”

“Are you going to tell me why you wanted me to come here, or do you just enjoy making me walk unnecessarily?”

“I’m on a mission, and I think you might be interested in helping.”

“I would bet everything in the vault that you’re incorrect.”

“Just hear me out,” he said. “I’m trying to find the unreleased student histories.”

“Can you not just wait a year? Are you really that impatient?”

“It’s not me I’m looking for.” He stepped closer to me and dropped his voice. “What if I told you that there are some students who were never given their history?”

“Why not?”

“That’s the million-dollar question.”

“And what makes you think I’m worried about that?”

“Because the last person I know who had this issue had a rather similar . . . circumstance as you.”

“What does Lindy have to do with me?”

His back straightened, and he peered down his nose at me. “How do you know I’m talking about Lindy?”

“Well, besides this pretty transparent reaction,” I said, gesturing to his awkward posture, “I also don’t know who else would be interested in talking to you for more than five minutes.”

“Besides you.”

“I consider myself a nonconsenting party to most of our conversations.”

He rolled his eyes. “Fine. You’re right.”

“Obviously, I’m right,” I said, crossing my arms. “So, again, I ask, what does she have to do with me besides making me want to move rooms?”

“She was the other Jane Doe.”

Despite my best efforts, that piqued my interest.

I raised a brow at him. “Yeah?”

“She was buried in a shallow grave wrapped in a rug. The two of you are the only Jane Does in recent history, and she’s on her third year and still hasn’t had her history released, but no one will tell her why.”

“And you think they’ll do the same for me?”

“Do you not?”

“Has she asked?”

He rolled his eyes. “No, it never crossed her mind. I’ll run back now and tell her my big discovery.”

“You never know, maybe she was just trying to get rid of you for the evening and sent you on a fool’s errand.”

A devious smile crept across his face.

“Based on everything you’ve heard, you really think she had better plans for a Saturday night?”

“God, is it really this easy to make men do what you want?”

“Pretty much.”

“That’s pathetic.”

“I heard you weeping like a baby last night, so perhaps you shouldn’t be throwing stones.”

“Go to hell.”

I heard the smirk return to his voice as he said, “I’m putting that off. That’s why I’m at this stupid school.”

“All right, I’m done. Happy hunting.” I went to step around him and out of the tunnels, but I felt my cane disappear from my hand, sending me toppling forward onto the floor.

Looking up, I found him holding my cane up to the bioluminescent bug sitting on the top shelf. “This is truly fine craftsmanship. Who made it?”

I kicked him with my good leg, but he sidestepped my blows with ease.

“You’re such a fucking dick.”

“I’m aware.”

“I’m not helping you or your shitty fucking girlfriend.” I flipped back on my front and pushed onto my knees, prepared to crawl my way out of the catacombs and worry about my cane later.

Before I could cover any ground, the sharp sensation of the wood burrowing between my shoulder blades forced me down until my chest was pressed into the cold stone.

“If you would stop being so pigheaded, you’d realize how much you might benefit from helping me.”

His voice was almost lost under the chime as midnight vibrated through the campus.

“What makes you think I care about my history?” I wheezed, the pressure of my cane stifling my voice until it was indistinguishable beneath the ebbing chime.

“Agreeing to meet me down here implies a degree of desperation, you have to admit,” he said, lifting the cane from my back. “So, clearly, there’s something you want to find, whether you know it or not.”

I gasped for air. “Which I deeply regret.”

He flipped my cane around and lowered the handle to me. “I’m sorry, but I can’t have you leaving without helping me.”

I snatched it out of his hand, prepared to clobber him senseless. But just as I was about to unleash my fury, an odd rumbling from the dark end of the tunnel cut me short.

We froze, our eyes flicking to the darkness, as a pale glow appeared from the depths. I sat up, clutching my cane to my chest like it could defend me against whatever was rumbling toward us.

A second later, our pursuers appeared from around the bend, revealing themselves to be thousands of mice. We stayed frozen, a wave of heat filling the tunnel as the tiny glowing bodies darted around us, unfazed by our presence as they continued toward the surface.

Something occurred to me as they leaped over my legs. What if, when Professor Faun was warning me not to follow the mice, he didn’t mean to follow where they were going but where they were coming from?