Chapter 16

We didn't say much as we headed back to the cabin, but we didn't need to. Our fingers kept drifting back and forth toward each other, as if they couldn't be physically kept apart, and there were random moments when he pulled me in for another kiss against a tree trunk. Nothing as hardcore as a few minutes ago, but enough to tell me that the dynamic between us had definitely changed. I wasn't completely sure what those changes would look like, and the butterflies were definitely flitting around my stomach as we moved around each other, but I just knew that things were going to be different.

When we got back to the cabin, I turned to him, biting my lip. "I'm gonna go for a quick shower."

"Can I come?"

I grinned at his wolfish smile and leaned up to kiss him. "Cool it, or I might start thinking you're greedy."

"Oh, I'm definitely greedy when it comes to you."

My toes curled in my shoes, but I kept my voice cool as I turned away from him. "Promises, promises."

I didn't get very far before I was spun around and backed against the wall, his lips pressed to mine. "It's a good thing you can take my promises to the bank."

I gave in to the kiss for a few seconds before gently pushing him away and sliding out from between him and the wall. "Maybe after lunch you can mess me up again, if you play your cards right."

I could feel his wolfish smile on me as I walked away and shut the bathroom door behind me, turning on the hot water of the shower and stripping off my clothes. Looking at myself in the mirror, I looked like I'd been savaged; the skin on my shoulder was red from the scratchiness of his beard. The heat pooled in my belly at the thought of that beard between my legs, and I shook my head at myself, grinning like an idiot as I got into the shower.

Oh, you're a total idiot, Macy,I thought to myself as I scrubbed the dirt from my hands. If I thought that I would escape this situation without completely falling for him, I had another thing coming. I was already gone, and now the situation was just a matter of figuring out how to deal with the fallout.

I was definitely grateful for him and his generosity. There was no reason why he should've had to offer me a place to stay. Everything I saw of him told me that he really did value his privacy, and I saw no hints that he had any company around the cabin other than Bucky. I highly doubted that it was just a matter of him wanting to get laid. Any man who looked like that wouldn't have any trouble, if he took the time to seek out the company.

No, he'd seen that I needed help, and he'd given it to me. He'd known exactly where I was in life, and he'd been what I needed. As it turned out, he'd been even more than I could've anticipated.

I shuddered despite the heat of the water, as I thought about what might've happened if I hadn't stumbled upon his cabin. I probably wouldn't have found my way out of the forest for many hours more, if ever, and then I would've had to deal with Alex on my own.

Instead, I was safe here. I thought of the job I'd abandoned and the fact that Alison was probably worried about me. I'd just disappeared without so much as a word.

Regardless, I really should start thinking of some way to contribute to the grocery fund or something. It didn't feel right for me to just be up here, eating his food and not paying him back.

I turned off the water, resolving to talk to Dillon about it when I got out of the shower. As much as the dynamic had shifted between us, I wasn't comfortable with the idea of just being his live-in with no job except to cook for him on occasion and be infinitely pleasured by him.

I went to my room and put on my clothes, towel-drying my hair quickly and putting it up into a messy bun.

It felt strange to walk out into the living room, since my instinct was to go over to him and put my hands on his shoulders, run my fingers through his hair… but we weren't together. That was what I had to keep reminding myself as I walked out into the living room where he wasn't sitting at his console.

I looked around for a second before spotting him at the island, casually sipping at a glass of water as he played with a small card of some kind.

"I wanted to talk to you about something," I said, walking over to the cupboard and grabbing a glass to pour myself some water too. After that walk and the other exertions, I was definitely feeling parched.

"What a coincidence because I wanted to ask you something."

The cold tone of his voice brought me up short for a second, but I wasn't about to let him see how bothered I was by it. I just filled the glass and turned back around, looking at him steadily as I sipped from it. "Yeah? What's that?"

He looked down at the card he'd been playing with, seeming to study it, before looking back up at me and saying, "Who's Macy Wallace?"

My hands suddenly got cold, and the feeling seemed to rush from my fingertips as I held the glass. "What—how—"

He set the card down on the counter so I could look at it. It was my LA driver's license, and my stomach started to plummet. I chanced a look up at his face, and I couldn't decide whether to be comforted or terrified that he looked so calm.

"Where did you find that?" I said, unable to hide the shaking in my voice and hating how vulnerable it made me sound.

"I keep some spare charge cables in the guest room, so I went in there while you were in the shower to get one. I saw this on the desk, and I wouldn't have looked at it twice, except that ‘Wallace' is a pretty different name from ‘Keene.'" He set his glass down on the island and walked around the island slowly. His frame soon came into my space, the full breadth of him a little overwhelming to me.

"Keene was my grandmother's maiden name, and since I'm named after her anyway, I figured I could borrow the name when I left home." I exhaled, shutting my eyes against the tears that worked to get out. "I needed to create some kind of new identity for when I left. Alex didn't know that name, but at least it still felt like something that was mine."

He was silent, and I couldn't help edging my finger out so that it was near the warmth of his hand.

"My real name is Macy Evelyn Wallace. I took my mom's maiden name when we left my dad. And I'm telling you all of this so that you know that I didn't actually mean to keep anything from you. I just—you were still an unknown quantity for a while, and you gave me a place to stay, and I had no idea what your motivation was for your generosity at first. I know I should've—"

"Macy." I looked up at him, and I was surprised to see that his face was colored with an intense compassion. "You're not the first person to take a new name when you left your past behind, and you won't be the last."

I sighed, the breath rippling out of me.

Without another word, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around me, rocking me back and forth. "It's okay, Macy. It's okay."

"I hate this. I hate everything right now. I hate not feeling like myself. I hate not doing my job, I hate not using my name, I hate being afraid all the time. I hate this."

"I don't blame you," he said, resting his cheek against my hair as he held me. "Those are a lot of things that are worth hating."

"I don't hate you," I said, pulling away from him to look up at him, into his beautiful green eyes that lit up with amusement.

"I guess that's something," he said. "I don't hate you either."

"Good," I said, but the tears kept flowing. He reached down and took my hand, pulling me over to the couch and sitting down. As I took my seat on top of him, I noticed that his hands were still filthy from our escapade out in the woods, and it brought the memory sharply back to me, but I was too tired from the revelations to do anything more than curl into his arms.

As much as my heart might've been in danger, in that moment, I couldn't remember the last time I'd felt so safe. Any thought I'd had before of needing to distance myself from Dillon drifted out of my head as the exhaustion set in, and the last thought I had before I drifted off was of the comforting way that Dillon's heartbeat in time with mine.