Chapter 19

Kimble

Dread coated my skin when I woke up. I wasn’t on his chest. I rolled to his side but he wasn’t there. With a jerk I sat up straight, whipping my head left and right, sure he would be around. But he wasn’t. This was very odd. But what did I expect from a wolf like him?

Bitterness trickled into my mouth and slowly made its way to my chest when I realized he must have left early to see to the arrangements for the Moonlit Choosing Ritual. I smacked my head. “Stupid girl,” I scolded myself.

There were a thousand questions in my mind, and the main one was what would I do after he got his chosen mate. He was going to marry someone. How was I going to fit into this equation? The more I thought, the firmer I became about my decision.

By lunch, I’d packed most of my clothes to move back to the servants’ quarters. Even if he didn’t tell me openly, I knew I had to. An hour earlier I’d gone to clean my old room. I picked up my bag and lugged it all the way back there with other Omegas watching me in amusement.

As I arranged my things, I felt a longing to call Jackie. She always alleviated my mood. But I knew she was at work, and so I left her a message.

By evening I was settled into my room and had sorted all my cupboards. Since I didn’t feel like eating anything, my body was running on black coffee. Sitting with a cup on the couch, I stared into space. The ritual must be in full swing with people milling around the site. I’d heard from the servants that the Elders were already here.

My sadness clung to me like a heavy fog, blurring the edges of my world. It was as if the sun had set inside me, leaving only a pale, fading light. My heart felt like an empty room, hollow and echoing with the quiet ache of loss. Tears welled up, slow and steady, like rain gathering in the clouds before falling silently to the earth. Every breath I took seemed to carry the weight of a storm I wanted to escape. Why was Talon’s decision to take part in the ritual affecting me?

All at once, the feeling my mother had tried to suppress over the years returned. My body was covered in a thin layer of sweat. I gasped, falling to the floor. What was it that wanted to come out of me? Break away from me? “Please… stop…” I said as I crawled back to the couch. I lay on it and passed out, insensible until I sensed a sharp object piercing my skin. I snapped open my eyes and tried to get up, only to be restrained by two muscular arms. A hand shot to my mouth, stifling my scream. With my eyes wide, I looked at the man who was injecting something into my arm. I tried to kick him, but my limbs turned weak. Tears welled in my eyes when I saw it was Kenzie. “What are you—?” I whispered.

“Shh…” he said. “This will keep you sedated and hazy till the work is done.”

“What work?” I was blindfolded and then a bag was forced over my head. Kenzie picked me up and hauled me over his shoulder as I slid deeper into the darkness. I mumbled, “Are you going to kill me?”

I had started trusting Kenzie because he had been the only man who spoke nicely to me. But this was like an axe struck deep into the tree of trust. The betrayal split me open, sap bleeding from the wound, leaving me hollow.

He didn’t answer, but another injection pierced my skin. Whatever twinkling lights of thoughts and memories remained in the sky of my mind, the stars dimmed one by one. They flickered and faded until only the cosmos remained, enveloping me in an endless night.

Whenever Mom locked me in a cupboard when her clients used to come, she would say that darkness represented the unknown and unseen. I would beg her not to lock me in because I was left locked up hours. She would laugh, saying I should challenge my senses and see darkness as a space of potential. I didn’t know when the physical darkness merged with my mental darkness and turned my world into a constant turmoil of depression and lack of clarity. My mind clouded, hope seemed distant. The cruel interplay of physical and mental darkness created a sense of disorientation. I confronted my fears and uncertainties in that little space all alone, listening to moans and groans. It was so sickening at times that I would cover my ears and think of a journey from the darkest recesses of a cave into the light.

I woke up with a start, my mind emerging from a foggy abyss. My senses struggled to make sense of my surroundings, like a ship lost in a dense mist. Cold wind swirled around me as the rough bark of a tree pressed into my back, its somewhat smooth surface a cruel reminder of my captivity.

The blindfold was still wrapped tightly around my eyes like a suffocating shroud, but I realized I was… naked. My wrists were bound, holding me fast, the ropes biting into my skin.

I heard the rustle of leaves and distant calls of animals, wolves howling, squirrels running around—sounds of freedom which were all out of reach, mocking my helplessness.

Kenzie betrayed me and left me tied in a forest to be devoured by animals. What a death. He did it only because I was a thorn in the power dynamics of this society, because Alpha Talon was interested in me. Why didn’t he ask me whether I was interested in him? They could have let me go. Freedom… It was a word that looked nice in dictionaries.

Well… Happy birthday to me.

All of a sudden, a collective piercing howl echoed through the night. A deep voice resonated with a deep commanding timbre, “For centuries, the Moon Goddess has been our guide. Tonight, the moon shines brightest, illuminating the path we follow. The Moonlit Choosing Ritual, a time-honored ceremony, is upon us. When the moon reaches its zenith, its light will bathe us and force us to reveal the primal urges that course through our veins. This is the night when bonds are forged, destinies intertwine, and the future of the packs will be shaped.”

My mouth dropped as goosebumps pebbled my skin. Shock and confusion. Desperation and fear. All of it crashed into my chest as I tipped my chin up trying to comprehend.

He continued in the same steady, unwavering voice, rich with the resonance of years of wisdom. “May the bonds formed tonight be as strong as the cedars that surround us. Let the Moonlit Choosing Ritual begin!”