Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Justin decided to take the car as far as he could, abandoning it under trees, wiping it down again, amazed he had even got this far. The dizziness had passed and he didn't feel sick anymore, although he doubted he had anything left in his stomach and he was unsteady on his feet. He cut down a branch and used his body weight to yank at it until he had a stick to balance his awkward, painful steps. He managed to get onto Crooked Tree land, remembering the trails, avoiding everyone, and making his way to the old cabins way up near the tree line.

He pushed through tangled roots and bushes, taking care to have the foliage close behind him, and stumbled to the first cabin he found. Its door listed open, cracked wide enough for him to enter easily.

He slumped to the ground, exhausted and sore, and made his way through the list.

Xander Walden, Dillon Naves, David Crane, Travis Graham, Jamie Crane. Justin rolled the names around in his head.

Xander had been arrested early on and committed suicide before Justin could get to him. Xander Walden, who had been the one to cut him, to rape him, to pay special attention to Adam made Justin sick thinking of it to this day.

Dillon and David were dead with Justin's bullets in their brains as they tried to run.

Travis? He'd been hanging on the side of a building, pleading with Justin to pull him up, to help him, and Justin had backed away, listening to his pleas and ignoring them, until Travis's arms finally gave up on holding his weight. Screaming, Travis plunged ten stories to land right on the sidewalk. His blood had pooled around his broken body.

Justin looked down—and felt nothing.

Four down, one to go. Just Jamie Crane to find now. Jamie, the kid who'd watched and done nothing.

Dillon had held Adam down as David poured chemicals down Adam's throat. Xander and Travis had laughed and encouraged it all. Then they'd done the same thing to Justin.

And Jamie had done nothing. A frightened kid, yes, but a part of it nonetheless.

Justin and Adam had stumbled onto the five of them by accident, just new meat for sadistic shit that got the group worked up to carry their hatred into a city, bombing and killing. The four men hurt Justin, yes, but more than that, they destroyed Adam.

Four large men, with the two boys tied up, talked of what they needed to do, of the explosives they had, of the way they would incite hatred.

And throughout all of it, Adam had been so quiet. He'd lost consciousness the first time they hurt him. Xander Walden had choked him unconscious, and Justin had prayed Adam would stay that way as they forced Justin to watch them hurt his best friend. Adam was in and out of consciousness, his words slurring; he couldn't remember where they were or who Justin was. He was dying right in front of Justin.

Justin never lost consciousness; he remembered it all.

He remembered the moment they hit Adam so hard Justin thought they'd killed him, slammed his head against the concrete in the bunker, blood spraying up the wall. He recalled every single horrific moment of what they did to Adam.

And they'd paid.

Justin had found them and killed them all, directly or indirectly. He'd put himself in a position where he could look down at their faces and know they were gone from this earth. That they wouldn't hurt him, or anyone he loved, again.

All except Jamie. He'd gone to ground, hidden himself so well, that Justin hadn't found him.

Yet.

The four he'd killed had paid for what they'd done to Adam, for the torture they'd inflicted on the both of them, for the way they splashed chemicals over them and left them to burn to death.

They'd killed Adam. The last thing Justin saw was Adam lying unmoving. Adam's last sound before that, his scream of horror as chemicals ignited around him, echoed in Justin's head as clearly today as it had done twelve years ago.

Justin held the gun in his lap, the cold steel heavy and familiar in his hold. That gun had killed Dillon and David. Seeing Travis experience absolute terror on that side of that building had been what stopped Justin from shooting him, too, and making his exit from the world an easy one.

Revenge for Adam.

"Jamie Crane," Justin murmured. Jamie would be the only one to get away with what had happened, because there was no way Justin was making it out of the cabin. The pain was too much; his head was cloudy, his thoughts rambling and incoherent even to him. He had a fever, was going to die there.

But he wasn't going to go slowly. He turned the gun to face himself, the barrel at his temple, his finger on the trigger.

Jamie Crane was the only one left, the one he couldn't find, the one who'd stood by and done nothing as the others tortured him and Adam.

Was it worth more pain to stay in this existence and find him? Betrayal burned, and Jamie had just been a kid. Like Justin, like Adam.

Pain knifed through Justin's head and his neck, and he heard himself whimper.

I might as well leave now.

It would be easy to pull the trigger. He slid the barrel into his mouth, angling it up. No point in doing this by halves, he wanted the bullet in the brain; he wanted death.

He'd given up everything. His family, his identity, his life, to make amends. And the team had lied to him. They'd said Adam was dead, that they would give Justin access to anything he needed to make things right, and Justin had taken the bargain. The one where he became a hired killer because doing that meant he could make things right for Adam.

Adam is alive.

Something unfurled deep inside him and Justin recognized it for what it was: a slow flow of emotion he couldn't handle.

The barrel was cold, his mouth dry, and he curled his tongue around its length, tasting the metal and counting down to the moment he would take himself away from all of this.

Five.

For Adam.

Four.

For the pain and the scars and the agony of memories.

Three.

For Ethan, who is better off thinking his little brother is dead.

Two.

For me. Because I can't live with this anymore.

One.

He couldn't do it.

Justin pulled the gun from his mouth. Hot tears like acid on his skin.

He had a job to do; he still needed to find Jamie, the last one on his list. He needed to kill him, watch him die.

For Adam.