Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

Jay made some final notes and stretched in his chair. He had forgotten to talk to Nate about Henry—about how concerned he was at what he was hearing and how he didn't know where to start to put it right. The one thing he meant to cover and it had flown from his head. Talk about my cock ruling my brain .

He'd been damn pleased to hear the word ‘gay' coming from Nate's mouth, and hell, he'd just known that Nate was checking him out. There was a lot of Nate that Jay wanted to check out in return. From the tip of his leather boots to the cowlicks in his wavy hair, Nate was all man. All cowboy. Two weeks since that horseback ride—fourteen days—and he had managed to look his fill of Nate at every occasion he could without getting caught for a single one of them. Apart from Ashley, who called him on it last night. Jay had managed to avoid a conversation when— thankfully —Josh asked him to take down a box of cereal, but Jay knew the subject would not be dropped.

"Hey, little brother," Ashley said from the door.

Talk of the devil….

"Hey."

"You finished in here now?"

"Just." He closed the folder with his findings. Tomorrow he would catch Nate, or maybe Gabe, and ask them about Henry. The hand was an old-timer, just short of sixty-three, and was mentioned more than once in the phone conversations he had made today. He could be a fly in the ointment that was Crooked Tree.

"Can we talk?" Ashley sounded hesitant, but that wasn't a new thing. Though she had Jay's unconditional support, she still worried about discussing anything with him.

He pushed his chair from the desk and picked up the folder. He'd check through all the notes when he was in bed. "Sure."

They left the office, and Jay pulled the door shut. The sharp Montana wind, icy and cutting, swirled around them as they walked outside. Jay pulled up the collar of his jacket and cursed the fact that the office was too warm to wear thermals, because he damn well needed them out here. He let Ashley decide where they were walking, and she led them over the bridge and into the stand of trees that hid their place from the private houses.

"Is it Kirsten?" Jay asked as soon as they stopped. Ashley shook her head, then scuffed her feet. "Josh?"

"Josh. Me. Lewis," she said wearily.

Concern knifed through him as keenly as the cold air affecting his skin beneath the material of his jacket. He focused solely on Lewis's name. "Did that bastard contact you?" He'd been expecting a call. It wasn't as if they were hiding, and Lewis had contact details for Josh—not that he had ever used them when he was inside.

"No," she said firmly. "Nothing from him."

Jay had played this scene before. He was the little brother, but he was also the one thing Ashley had to be her crutch. He had a certain set of questions he asked whenever Lewis came up in conversation. If she fancied herself still in love with Lewis, then it wasn't Jay's place to say she shouldn't be. He was there to facilitate her understanding of where she was in life and how she was handling things. Or so the family counseling woman had said. He hadn't thought to ask if Lewis was even allowed out of the city? Did he get parole? Was he tagged? Was Ashley sad that Lewis had taken no action to find her or Josh?

"How does that make you feel?"

She shrugged. "Like he's a long way away, and I can breathe."

"That's a good thing, then." Jay had never heard Ashley consign Lewis to the distance. He had always been so prevalent in her life.

"Yes and no—I'll have to see him one day, birthdays, graduation, you name it—it's not fair to expect Josh to miss out on having a daddy."

Jay said nothing. He didn't agree at all. He wanted Lewis gone permanently so that Ashley could move forward. Instead, he focused on the other name she'd thrown out.

"What about Josh?"

She chuckled. "Just that he was born to live here. Have you seen? He's around the horses whenever he can, and he's got one of Luke's old hats. I've not seen him this happy in a while. I don't want to take him away from here when your contract is up."

"We always said we'd left New York permanently," Jay said softly. "We're not going back. And as for Josh? He's always been a good kid, Ash, we'll see how it goes when he gets to school." Jay had accompanied Ashley to both of the kids' schools. Kirsten had sulked most of the time, but the principal didn't seem fazed at all by it. That was a plus point.

Kirsten didn't argue when she was told that only one piercing was allowed in each ear although her expression was mutinous as she listened. Josh's teacher was a bundle of sunshine, or that was how Jay described her in his head. Short, blonde, vivacious, she had teaching experience in special needs and decided there and then that Josh was going to be a little star in her class. Jay could almost see Josh fall in love with her on the spot.

"Then there's Gabe," Ashley added quietly.

"What about Gabe?" Jay left the statement open-ended. He kind of knew what the issue was but needed to hear it from Ashley.

"He asked me out to dinner," she said carefully.

"He did? That's great. I like him, Ash. I'd have to murder him in his sleep if he hurts you." He was joking and at first couldn't understand the sudden pain that flitted across his sister's face. He realized what he had said, and he hated his careless use of words. He didn't want to put any link to Lewis against Gabe's name.

"That's the thing," she said. "I like him. He's good with Josh, and he tried to talk to Kirsten."

"But there's a problem? You don't want to go? You're worried he's like Lewis? I don't know him or his brothers that well, but seems to me he and Lewis are as different as night and day."

"How can you tell that, Jay? We've only been with the family two weeks and already you say you know what Gabe is like?"

Jay immediately decided he wasn't rising to that line of questioning. The last thing he wanted to do was bring up the fact that the first time he'd met Lewis, the man had been stoned. Gabe was all sincerity and manners, and he was friendly and welcoming. "It's easy, Ash. You like him, right?"

"But what could come of it?" She hugged herself around her middle and shifted a little closer to the shelter of the nearest tree and out of the wind.

"Dinner," Jay said firmly. "A nice steak, maybe some wine, embarrassing silences. The usual. Maybe you'll have fun."

"You make it sound so easy."

Jay stepped forward and pulled his sister into a close embrace. "It can be easy if we want it to be. We have to go with the flow." She chuckled in his hold and burrowed into his jacket.

"I love you, Jay."

"I love you too, sis," Jay said quietly.

They stood that way for a while until she was the one to pull back.

"Your turn. Tell me about Nate."

Jay snorted a laugh. "What is this? A Todd brothers appreciation night?"

She pushed him in the chest. "Have you found out yet what team he's on? Is he gay like you thought? Is there a chance?"

"When is my gaydar ever wrong?"

"Are we counting you hitting on our postman, who was married with three kids?"

"Marriage and kids does not a straight man make," Jay deadpanned. "Actually, I've just found out for sure with Nate."

She tilted her head in question. "And?"

"And what?" He could play deliberately obtuse if it gave him more thinking time.

"What next?"

That was a leading question. What next…? He'd been drooling over the rough-and-ready cowboy for two weeks, which was bad enough. To then add in the man all polished up? That wasn't fair on his libido.

"I wound him up tonight. Got all close, then asked where the nearest gay club was. You should have seen him fly after that. He's definitely interested in something, and it would be cool to have someone to keep me warm at nights."

Ashley smacked him on the chest again. "It's not like you to do that; wind a guy up then laugh about it."

Jay winced. She was right, he was never the one who played games. Straight down the middle, anyone he was with always knew exactly what he wanted. "I just ruffled him up a bit. To see what's what. You know I didn't push him too far, because he's the guy who writes the checks."

"I get it, you're playing around. Just be careful," she warned.

"I was joking." Jay was suddenly serious. "Just… I don't know… there's something about Nate that makes me want to do things I've never done before."

Like kissing. A lot of kissing. And talking. And sex with my boss… lots of sex.

"Like?"

"Sit in the dark with a campfire? I don't know what, just… things."

"I know what you mean." Ashley sighed and gripped his hand in hers. "Gabe has that effect on me."

"Imagine if we ended up with brothers," Jay teased. "Is that kind of weird?"

Ashley laughed and together they walked toward the place Jay thought of as home. A Jeep pulled in the parking area on the other side of the bridge, and the Todd brothers piled out. Gabe and Luke were laughing and joking and generally acting like hyper siblings. Nate looked more serious—more so when, with his arms crossed over his chest, he stared over at Jay.

Damn cowboy was making a statement there and then; drawing a line in the dirt with his heated looks and his stubborn sexiness. Jay deliberately lifted a hand and waved, and in response Nate turned on his heel and walked up the path to the private houses. Gabe waved back though, a grin slashing his face. Luke said something, and whatever he said had Gabe cuffing his little brother around the ear. Then they followed Nate, and all too soon Jay and Ashley were in their own place with the door shut against the world.

"Got to love those cowboys," Ashley said with a small smile.

"God, yeah" was all Jay could say. Damn right he wanted to love on one of them in particular. And pretty damn soon.

Jay was restless. Bundled up in his coat and with blankets across his legs, he curled up on the porch chair and stared out into the Montana night. Here there was no light pollution—just miles and miles of endless ebony sky and scattered stars that shone brightly against the black. He knew nothing about the heavens, just that he had a Virgo star sign and somewhere up there, the stars that made up the constellation sat in a neat pattern.

Ashley had sat with him when he first came outside. They drank hot chocolate in companionable silence for a while until she complained it was too cold and wandered indoors.

Jay was amazed at how easy he had slipped into the rhythm of this new place. He loved his office, his independence, and that he was looking at marketing from an entirely new perspective and coming up with ideas. The buzz of it was as high as the office in the city—with a different focus. The contract he had here was open-ended, but maybe, he should consider whether there was enough here for him to stay in Montana. There was prestige in working for one of the big-city companies, but there he was always a small cog in a very big machine. Here on the ranch it was different.

The noise of hooves on the graveled path over the bridge had him wondering if maybe the enigmatic Nate was on his way here on his beloved Juno. They could be taking a ride in the evening as they appeared to do every night, then decided to go by Jay's place. The hoof noises grew closer, then stopped altogether. From guesswork, Jay had the horse and rider unmoving and at the front of the cabin. A few moments later, the noise began again, and Juno appeared around the side of the house with her nose pointed up to the tourist cabins. Nate wasn't looking at the back porch—he could have no way of knowing that Jay was here, and this was the perfect opportunity for Jay to stay hidden and enjoy his peace. Only… he didn't want to.

"Evening," he called.

Nate shifted in his saddle and peered into the darkness of the porch before guiding Juno to the wooden surround. "Hey."

"Hey, yourself. Good date?" Jay knew damn well it hadn't been a date that Nate had prettied himself up for. He'd not only seen the three Todd brothers arrive back in the car, but Josh had told him before bed that Luke had a parent-teacher conference. Appeared that Nate and Gabe took a keen interest in their brother's education.

"It wasn't a date," Nate's voice rumbled. He dismounted and laid the reins on a wooden post. "I wanted to talk to you."

Jay indicated the chair next to him, then realized Nate might not be able to see the gesture. "There's a free chair here."

Nate took the steps to the porch and settled himself into the chair. Plainly the small amount of moonlight on this side of the cabin was enough for Nate to make his way there and sit without falling on his ass.

There was silence for a while, and the expectation of whatever the hell it was that Nate wanted to say was a heavy weight on Jay. In the end he dived in with conversation. "Is everything okay? Did you get my message about the website?"

Jay was particularly proud that he'd mastered some pretty hairy web code and fixed an issue with the ranch's ancient and unwieldy website so that it at least worked until the new one came online. That would go live as soon as they had the logo finalized.

"I did," Nate said simply. "It wasn't what I wanted to talk about."

"It's Henry, isn't it?" Jay asked immediately. Maybe he wouldn't have to talk about the one man he had issues with on the ranch—Nate had apparently picked up on the need to talk. "I realize we didn't get to talk about him before, and there's stuff I think you need to know."

Nate narrowed his gaze and sighed. "No, I wasn't here to talk about Henry either, but now that I am here, tell me what the problem is."

Nate settled back in the chair and propped his booted feet up on the porch surround, and for a second Jay lost his tongue. What a photo. A cowboy silhouette with the quarter moon and the stars. Perfect.

"It's not an easy thing to start explaining," Jay began. "You remember I was talking to the old visitors, getting feedback, and you recall I told you that everything was good, apart from the cabins being a little tired? They loved the experience and the horses, the roundups, the food at Branches, the atmosphere, the river…." Jay stopped as he realized he was simply repeating a lot of what Nate already knew. The thing was, he needed to soften the blow of the one thing that was causing an issue. Henry was a liability, but from talking to Sophie and Gabe, Jay was well aware that Henry was part of the furniture—a thirty-year employee at Crooked Tree.

"Yep."

"There was a common denominator in some of the conversations that had become more like complaints. Henry."

"Hmm," Nate hummed softly.

Jay sensed that Nate wasn't agreeing or disagreeing, just throwing out a noncommittal noise. Going great so far. Not.

"What do you mean by ‘hmm'?" Jay asked pointedly.

"Henry. A bit of a loose cannon. Says what he wants and to hell with the consequences. Ornery and close to retiring. I don't think he's that tolerant of the guests."

"You could say that. You had a couple here for their honeymoon—a gay couple."

"The McAllisters? Yeah, I remember them."

"Seems like Henry had some things to say on the matter. Then another family with two special needs kids, from last August?"

"Bryan and Tommy, loved the horses, both on the autistic spectrum. Tommy has Asperger's, I recall."

"Do you remember everything about the guests?" Jay changed direction quickly.

"Mostly I think of what they were like with the horses, but that isn't the point," Nate replied. "What about Bryan and Tommy?"

"The parents said they were dismayed by Henry's use of the word ‘retard' in their hearing."

"Why didn't they come tell anyone?"

"That is the next problem, Nate. Turns out they did, along with the McAllisters who registered their concern. They spoke to Marcus and followed it up with letters of complaint. When I dug out the paperwork, it looked to me like Marcus gave the standard reply, assuring them of the ranch's stance on both matters and how you didn't tolerate things like that. I'm not seeing any follow-up on the files, though, and believe me, those files are kind of thick for the last five years of issues. All it needs is for either one of those families to tell their friends, and suddenly Crooked Tree gets a reputation for being homophobic and intolerant."

Nate sighed and leaned his head against the back of the chair. "I'll deal with it," he said. "That guy is the bane of my life, but he's been here thirty years and is one of Marcus's close friends."

"Then you could get Marcus to talk to him."

"Marcus will tell you the same thing—that Henry is pretty much a permanent fixture around here."

Jay had a sudden unsettled feeling in his stomach about the dynamic between Nate and Marcus. He had thought Marcus was a figurehead and Nate was the one who really ran things. Was he wrong? Seemed like Marcus was the one pulling all the strings if Nate wasn't willing to cross the line and cut out the rot.

"He can't be permanent," Jay said quickly. "If you want to move Crooked Tree forward, then you need to think about letting the guy go."

"That's a bit harsh, Jay. He's a mostly harmless guy close to retiring."

Jay frowned. "You don't believe he's harmless. I can hear it in your voice."

"I said I'll deal with it."

"I'll hold you to that." That would have to do. Nate wasn't offering solutions, he was offering to handle the issue. That was sexy and at the same time kind of irritating. Jay pulled his thoughts back to whatever was the original reason Nate sat on his porch. "So, what did you want to see me about?"

"Oh, that. I'm going to Carter's tomorrow. It's Friday night and a good night to be there. I'll swing by and pick you up at ten if you want in?"

Want in? Of course, I want in. Far too many months had passed since he'd had the warmth of another guy anywhere near him. Jay considered what kind of guy might go to a biker bar. He wasn't 100 percent into the leather look, but there were bound to be cowboys there. Cowboys like Nate. Tall and strong and muscled and cut from the Montana mountains…. suddenly Jay had an image of a cowboy bending over for him and his cock stiffened under the blanket. Thank fuck for the bunched material and the dark. The thought of prepping and fucking and—jeez, that there was the sum of every single fantasy he'd used to get off this week.

He was fucked when he realized the cowboy had Nate's features.

"Tomorrow?" he asked weakly.

"If you want to come visit the place." Nate stood up and brushed the seat of his pants.

Looming over Jay, he blocked out any available moonlight, and suddenly Jay had a moment of clarity. He wanted Nate closer. Way closer. He scrambled to stand but still clutched the blanket over his groin. Was this actually Nate offering some kind of date? Or if not a date, an opportunity to exchange something other than this skirting around the issue they were doing.

"Yeah," Jay said eagerly. Was this going to be dancing and drinking and ending up getting some mutual satisfaction with the sexy cowboy?

Nate chuckled, leaned in, and Jay found himself mimicking the motion until not much space separated them. Anticipation curled inside Jay.

Nate whispered, "Take your own lube and condoms for whomever you hook up with. I always do." He stepped back, and with an economy of movement, he was up in the saddle and riding away.

For a second Jay stood with his mouth hanging open. He'd thought they would be going together… then… shit . Had he had the tables turned on him?

A smile curved his lips as he listened to the receding hoof beats and watched as the dark swallowed Nate.

Fucker.