Chapter Three

In Which an Agreement, A Farewell, and the Lady Enters Her Lake

I stared up at him, this man, this god, that I knew so well. And yet, until today, I'd never seen his face. He stared so intently, his focus tangible on my skin. His plan was a mystery to me, but the idea of it terrified and tantalized me. A liquid, pulsing heartbeat that I couldn't suppress. Surely, if I somehow managed to do so, I'd die just as quickly.

I gulped and watched as his face changed. I could see him feel the muscles in my neck move, the power it gave, despite the inaccuracy of the scenario. He couldn't kill me if he tried, unless I allowed it, but whatever passed between us was the closest I've ever been to true danger.

When I spoke, my voice was a rasping whisper, certainly not what I'd intended, and far more vulnerable than I was comfortable with. "Why do you call me that?"

I should have asked him about his "solution." Instead, the question bubbled through my lips before I could stop it. I'd wondered for years. "Princess" had always been his favorite condescension, but it had never stung quite the way I thought he meant it to.

"Ah, now there's a question," he said. He smirked as he said it, and I realized that in this form, he was taller than I was by a fair bit. Why had I allowed that to happen? I'd always been careful to avoid putting myself at a disadvantage, especially with him.

"I decided long ago that if I was to be what you needed, if I was truly your greatest adversary, I could not allow you dominion over me. If I addressed you as Lady, or my Goddess too frequently, I'd inherently internalize a power differential. To me, you could not be more powerful. I needed to know, to believe to my very core, that we were equals. Otherwise, you'd surely prevail every time. And that's no fun for anyone, is it?"

"N-no." My breathing quickened. Perhaps I'd made a mistake when I'd fashioned my body. I modeled it on the humans I so loved, and subjected myself to the weaknesses such a body would impose. So, I breathed. My heart raced. Blood pumped through my veins along with magic, displaying the way he affected me plainly.

"Now, to my idea..." he flexed his fingers again, running his thumb along my artery. "You want to atone for your mistake, to give the world time to mature without your influence? I propose you submit to my punishment, with guidelines, of course, and I will help you make amends. I've an idea where I could execute this "slumber" you mentioned in your original missive. Because I'd be overseeing it, I'd remain in contact with you, in complete control of your keeping, wellbeing, protection, progress, and schedule. Perhaps, by the time your self-imposed exile was over, we'd have learned a few things, and you'll emerge the goddess I know you are capable of being."

The idea should not have excited me. I should have screamed in horror or lashed out at him, showing him what a ridiculous notion it was that he should have dominion over me. I should have burned him to a crisp where he stood, or at least transported myself back.

And yet, I did not. I stared up at him, my mind whirling faster than my human body should allow. I couldn't comprehend what was happening to me. Here I was, being held so gently, so firmly, by my greatest enemy. I was shivering all over… and it was the most thrilling experience I'd had in years, perhaps my entire life.

I hadn't felt as exhilarated since I had learned of the planet Earth and conceived of my own. Since then, for years, I had tried to recreate the adrenaline-fueled euphoria of my discovery.

And so, instead of burning him to a crisp or fleeing the situation, I tilted my head and pursed my lips. "What sort of guidelines?"

"Everything will be negotiated in advance, and I will not keep you beyond what you've agreed to. In fact, we should put safeguards in place to ensure that you can wake up, should you be ready before then."

It solved several of my problems quite tidily. I wouldn't have to worry about Orcus interfering with whoever I placed in charge of my slumber, because he would be in charge. For some reason I couldn't quite explain, that thrilled me.

I'd always felt I was someone who knew her own mind. But I was slowly learning how wrong I was. I had somehow created layers to Orcus and with his shadows gone, I'd apparently made him astoundingly beautiful, in the most dangerous way.

Days of careful preparation and planning later, I stood shivering inside my mountain. I'd needed to do everything I'd done, certainly, but I can't deny that I delayed more than needed. I might have hurt the people of this world, perhaps beyond repair, but I still loved them. It was because of this love that I needed to leave them. I'd made them for me, selfishly, and though I knew they deserved the chance to grow without my influence, I desperately wished that was not the case.

The cavern, though it would seem vast to a human, was snug for me, as I knew it would be for Orcus when he arrived. To one side was a small overlook where my people could, if they wanted, observe me.

A singular winding tunnel served as the opening to the valley beyond, to my perfect hamlet I'd created for my most steadfast supporters. On my trip to Earth, I'd observed a village that was perhaps the most magical place I'd ever seen, and I'd recreated it, with a few improvements, for my people. Inhaling, I closed my eyes, squeezing back tears. I'd not see the beautiful settlement for a thousand years, at least not with my own eyes.

Orcus had indicated that he disagreed with my intent of total isolation. He'd ensure that I had updates on their progress. It wasn't clear if this was a kindness or punishment—perhaps both.

Gunna, the leader of my people in this place I'd called Sanctuary, huffed at my side.

She'd been a valuable voice of reason for her short eighty years of life. To her, I still appeared perhaps twenty. This was something I'd been planning her entire life. It likely seemed like something she'd never actually expected to happen.

Truthfully, she'd spent the last forty years trying to dissuade me from my course. Though in the face of my preparations, the reality seemed to have settled. She'd never been anything but respectful, though she'd admittedly challenged me more than anyone else on the planet. She'd earned her place at the forefront of my people by questioning me when I'd needed it. My humans' lives were so short, barely two hundred years, worse, in many parts of the world, but I was still intimidating and timeless to most.

"All preparations have been made, my Lady." Gunna set her shoulders and lowered her voice. "Are you certain? I mean, Orcus? Must it be him? Surely one of the other?—"

"No." I cut her off. The last thing I needed was to question my choices. "It must be him, I'm quite sure." It was a query I'd wrestled with enough of my own. On the face of it, it seemed absurd. To submit myself to my greatest enemy.

And yet. I knew I must. No mortal could undertake the task of keeping me asleep, could keep me, no matter how I railed, from touching the world. While I'd certainly harmed his people the most, they were incapable of exacting my restitution, such as it was, and so he'd undertake it on their behalf.

In the brief moments I'd had to discuss it with him, I'd begun to worry that Orcus might not be quite as stern as I'd like, that he'd relent. But every other of the lesser gods would break long before he did.

He was my best option, whether I liked it or not.

Perhaps more concerning were the strange feelings that welled up inside me when I saw him without his cloak of shadows. Wrapped in them, it had been easy to make him my Dark Spectre, the terror of my nightmares. Without them, though he was still wickedness incarnate, I found the fear exhilarating.

Perhaps that was part of my punishment. I'd developed some sick fascination with the man I'd warred with for centuries. Now, I'd have to submit myself to his whims.

"It must be him." We'd debated it at nauseum, and Gunna knew my mind. I refused to explain myself further.

With perhaps perfect timing, Orcus coalesced, his shadows wrapping around him once more.

"Leave us," his voice rumbled through the cavern like thunder, rolling over me and caressing my insides until I shivered. A week ago, I'd have snapped at him for speaking in such a tone, but I needed to get used to his dominion, to trust his judgment.

So instead, I turned to Gunna and nodded. She held her hand out of me, then kissed her fingertips, settling it over her heart with silent tears running down her face.

Perhaps, if I was very good, Orcus would pass messages along for me.

Gunna stepped away, and in seconds, she disappeared. Orcus's shadows wrapped around us, and it struck me how odd it was to feel comforted by it. Instead of oppressive, they cocooned us, sheltering me from the outside world in a way I'd not experienced since the very beginning of my experiment.

Within his shadows, Orcus appeared as I'd come to know him, instead of the shadowy specter of my nightmares.

"I'll ask you again," he said. "Is this truly what you want? Do you freely submit yourself to my dominion, to make me your lord and master in all things, of your own will?"

"I do." I breathed. My entire body hummed with anticipation. A tether stretched between us. The oath we'd begun tugged me to him, though he could not extract such an agreement from me without reciprocation, our power imbalance, even now, too evenly matched.

"And you? Do you swear to ensure my punishment is enacted with the best interests of the world at heart, seeking restitution for those I've wronged and rehabilitation of your charge?" he said, his words whispering across my skin.

"I do." The tether of our connection pulled tight, binding us together in a magic more ancient than even my mother's.

The corner of his mouth hitched in a smirk, making me shiver. The feeling zipped through me, stimulating and sensitizing my entire body. With a nod, he held out his hand and escorted me into the aquifer.