CHAPTER SEVEN

AJAXSATBACK, his fingers on the stem of his wine glass. He seemed relaxed, but Erin felt the sudden tension. Cursing herself inwardly, she said, ‘It's a personal question. You don't have to—'

But he put up a hand. ‘You first. What were your plans?'

Erin hadn't been expecting that, but it was only fair. ‘All I knew was that I didn't want to be like my father...abandoned and sad. I mean, I was abandoned too, but it was different for me. A parent is one thing...but a partner, a lover... That was devastating for him. He never met anyone else. He was a single parent. It was lonely. I always wanted siblings. But I think I put off thinking about it until I had Ashling, and now I have to think about it.'

‘You want a family? For Ashling not to be an only child?' Ajax stated this almost as if it was something outrageous.

Erin looked at him. ‘I do. I'd like brothers and sisters for her. And I'd like to meet someone I can spend my life with... I don't want Ashling to be lonely, or to see me be lonely.'

‘You surely don't believe in love?' He sounded faintly mocking.

Erin avoided his eye. ‘I'm not that naive. In some ways I think perhaps there is some merit in arranged marriages...partnerships.'

So why did that feel like a lie even as she said it?

‘You're a good mother.'

Erin risked a glance at him. ‘Apart from the fact that I took so long to tell you about your daughter?'

Ajax shook his head and sat forward. ‘You were right, I'm not that accessible, and I know how consuming pregnancy and a new baby is. Even though Sofia had an army of nannies on standby from before the baby was even born, she wasn't immune to the stress and change it brought into her life.'

‘Did she want to be a mother?'

‘It was more that she was expected to have an heir. I don't think she and my brother had quite factored in the speed with which she got pregnant, though,' Ajax said. ‘Women don't mother in our world,' he added. ‘They delegate to others.'

Erin smiled wanly. ‘We aren't all that different, give or take a few hundred million euros and a dynasty spanning generations.'

The main course arrived, and Erin was surprised. She was genuinely enjoying talking to Ajax. Even about prickly things.

The main course was sea bream with sautéed seafood, house special mayonnaise and baby potatoes roasted in herbs. The food almost distracted Erin enough not to pursue her questioning—but not quite.

She took a sip of wine. ‘So now it's your turn. Were you ever planning on marrying and having a family?'

When Erin had looked Ajax up online, after they'd had their brief affair, nothing salacious had come up before his marriage to Sofia. There were pictures of him with stunning women, but no one had appeared with him more than once or twice.

Ajax sat back. ‘I can't say that I'd given it much thought. My brother was already on his way to creating the next generation. If I was to have had a family it would have been purely strategic—to get ahead in the business. There were several women from prominent families who would have been suitable, but now, in restructuring the family business, I've ensured that we're no longer dependent on something as archaic as marriage to foster security or longevity.'

Erin recalled that the future of the company would now be made secure through an independent board of management, under Ajax's control, well out of the hands of family.

‘Why was it so important for you to change things?' she asked.

‘Because my brother and I had been used as pawns all our lives, purely to carry on the Nikolau legacy. When he died, and I was all but forced into marriage with Sofia to avoid a scandal, I realised just how toxic it was. But really it was Theo who made me see things differently. He reminded me of when I was young and used to see other parents and families...they looked happy in a way I couldn't understand. I didn't want him to have the kind of life I had, brought up and moulded into a good servant of the business and family. He was his own person, and I was determined I wasn't going to force him into anything.'

Erin was touched. ‘I think he would have appreciated that.'

Ajax shrugged. ‘My grand revelation didn't matter in the end.'

‘You changed things anyway,' Erin pointed out. ‘You could have left it alone. You could even have walked away.'

Their plates were cleared. Erin declined coffee, but she was told she had to try the baklava—a Middle-Eastern staple and speciality of the restaurant. As expected, it was delicious. Creamy and sweet, encased in delicate filo pastry that melted on her tongue.

‘Amazing!'

She put her spoon down and looked up to see Ajax watching her. Immediately her heart sped up. She really wished she could be immune, so they could navigate this temporary faux romance and move on to the time when he would stay on the very periphery of their lives. All she could hope for was that maybe in time he would come to realise what a mistake he was making in choosing not to parent his daughter.

‘Ready to go?' he asked.

Erin nodded, suddenly aware that a lot of the people around them had left.

Ajax let her precede him, then put a solicitous hand on her lower back—which would have been fine if her back hadn't been bare. She could feel his fingers against her skin and they burned.

The manager bade them goodnight and waited by the open elevator doors. They stepped in. Was it Erin's imagination or had the space got smaller? Darker...more decadent? The images of couples cavorting in X-rated poses, small enough to trick the eye but impossible not to notice once you knew what they were, seemed to mock her.

The doors closed, encasing them in the dark, moody atmosphere. The elevator slowly moved downwards. Ajax stood on the other side, back against the wall, hands in his pockets. Supremely relaxed. And yet he had the air of an animal about to pounce.

Or was Erin losing it completely after champagne and a little wine? Quite possibly...

‘I really enjoyed that dinner. It was delicious... A little overpriced, considering what you paid at the auction, but—'

‘Erin.'

She stopped babbling. Ajax took his hand out of his pocket and came towards her, reaching behind her to press a button. The elevator came to a stop. She looked up at him, her mouth going dry.

She moistened her lips. ‘What are you doing?'

‘Do you have any idea what you've been doing to me all evening in that outfit?'

Erin shook her head, mesmerised by the look on Ajax's face.

‘Driving me insane.' He looked down at her chest. ‘All I could think about was sliding my hand under your top and touching you. Feeling the weight of your breast...your nipple growing hard.'

As if on command, Erin's nipples tightened against the material of her jumpsuit. Her breathing was shallow. ‘I thought... I didn't think you wanted me like that...'

His gaze moved back up. It was like a beam of heat leaving her skin.

‘I haven't stopped wanting you since we were together. I told you that.'

Erin swallowed. ‘But that was before you knew...'

He shook his head. ‘I still want you. I want to touch you right now. Kiss you.'

Erin had an overwhelming sense of déjà vu...back to another elevator on another continent. But that had been then and this was now. And he still wanted her. And she wanted him. And whatever else was going on suddenly seemed inconsequential.

But a small, sane part of her tried to resist. ‘There's no one here to see.'

‘I don't want anyone to see.'

Ajax's voice was a throaty growl that resonated deep inside Erin. All the way down to the pulse between her legs, hectically throbbing. Her resistance melted like snow on a hot stone.

‘I want you too.'

Ajax moved closer and put his hands either side of her head, on the wall behind her. She could see, out of the corner of her eye, their reflections. His tall, muscular body covering hers.

But then her focus narrowed down to Ajax's mouth as his head lowered and came closer. It covered hers so gently that she wondered if she was imagining it. She reached up and twined her arms around his neck. Suddenly he pressed closer, and the gentle touch turned into something much harder and more incendiary.

Her mouth opened under his, inviting him in, stoking the flames. One of his hands went to her head—she could feel her hair being mussed up—and his other hand splayed across her bare back, before moving around, fingers trailing across her skin, until he found the opening at the front of her top. His hand slipped inside and cupped her breast, thumb flicking against her pebbled nipple.

Erin almost lost the use of her legs, and she had to lock her knees. Ajax tore his mouth away. They were both breathing heavily. She could feel his erection against her lower belly. Hard.

Ajax pulled back a little and, leaving his lower body pressed against hers, used both his hands to push aside the flimsy silk covering her breasts. He looked down and Erin's gaze followed his. He cupped her breasts in his hands, the darkness of his skin making her own look even more pale.

Her nipples stood out, tight and pink, as if begging for his touch. He bent his head and encircled one straining tip in exquisite heat, sucking and laving it with his tongue.

Erin's fingers speared his hair, holding his head. She writhed against him, unconsciously seeking more. Seeking for him to fill the aching centre of her body.

A voice broke through the heat haze in her brain. It took her a second to figure out that someone was speaking in Greek through the intercom. Erin tugged Ajax's head back up and almost slid to the floor. His eyes were heavy-lidded, dark blue with desire, his cheeks slashed with colour.

At that moment he registered the voice too and stood upright, pulling Erin's clothes back into place. She was shaking.

Ajax said something rapid in response to the voice. He looked at Erin.

She caught a glimpse of her reflection in one of the mirrors and let out a squeak. Her hair was on end and her top was askew, showing half a breast. She smoothed her hair and adjusted her clothes.

Ajax said in a rough voice, ‘Ready?'

Erin nodded. She couldn't trust herself to speak. He took her hand and pushed a button. The elevator resumed its progress downwards. The doors opened and Erin couldn't look the doorman in the eye.

Luckily Ajax's car was right outside and she all but dived into the back seat, face burning with a mixture of shame, embarrassment, and also a very illicit excitement. This man brought out a side of her that had never existed before. Not even at college.

The car journey back to the villa was made in silence, but the air was thick enough to cut with a knife. Ajax was a couple of feet away from her, but she could still feel his heat. The impressions his hands had left on her skin...her breasts. They still throbbed, the peaks sensitised. Between her legs she felt molten.

Was he just going to walk away and say goodnight? That would be the wise thing to do. Not to relive the past. So if he did she wouldn't betray how much she wanted him.

But when the car pulled to a stop outside the main door Ajax came and held out a hand to help her out. He didn't let go. They went inside. Wordlessly, he led her upstairs. They stopped outside Erin's bedroom and he said, ‘Do you want to check her?'

The implication was clear. It wasn't over.

Erin nodded. She slipped inside and stood at Ashling's cot. The little girl was in more or less the same position as when she'd left her. The door to Damia's room was ajar. The baby monitor was on. She took her own anyway, just in case.

She kicked off her sandals and left her clutch behind. She went back to the corridor, where Ajax was waiting. He took her hand again and led her down to his room. Closing the door behind them.

Erin put the baby monitor down.

He moved closer and took her arm, removing the bangle. She took off the other jewellery. He led her over to the bed. The room was dimly lit. The French doors were open, allowing a warm breeze to flow through.

Ajax stood in front of her and said, ‘I want you, Erin. This isn't over between us.'

She looked at Ajax. ‘I'm not sure what "this" is,' she admitted, ‘but I want you too.'

He cupped her jaw. ‘It'll burn out...we just didn't give it time.'

As if it was an entity. Maybe it was. Maybe it would burn out. For him. Erin couldn't ever imagine not wanting him. But then she was less experienced, and so—

Ajax kissed the swirling thoughts out of her head, pulling her to him with his two big hands on her waist. Then he moved them over her back. He opened the clasp at the back of her neck.

The top of the jumpsuit fell away, exposing her breasts. Ajax looked at her, eyes hot. She couldn't wait. She reached for his shirt and undid it, pulling it open, over his shoulders, down and off. She undid his trousers, pulled down his zip, the backs of her fingers brushing against his body and making him suck in a breath.

She stopped, looked up.

He replaced her hands with his and quickly stripped until he was naked. Then he found the clasp at the side of her jumpsuit and opened it, pulling down the zip. The rest of the jumpsuit fell down to the floor and she stepped out of it, wearing nothing but her underwear.

‘Get on the bed. I've waited for this for so long.'

That admission landed somewhere that made her feel a little vulnerable, so she shut it out and focused on the physical. Her skin felt hot and tight. She did as he asked, lying back, looking up at him. He was magnificent. All hard muscle and sinew. A smattering of dark hair across his chest. Narrow waist.

He put on protection and then pushed her legs apart. He said, ‘I need this—you—now. Okay?'

Erin nodded wordlessly, humbled by the evidence of his attraction to her. How had she not seen it?

He lodged his body in between her legs and took her in one smooth, cataclysmic thrust. She was ready for him, but she still gasped at the sensation of his body joining hers, stealing every last breath and any rational thought. She also—dangerously—felt emotional. She hadn't thought she'd experience this again with him.

He moved, slowly, torturously, in and out, letting their bodies get reacquainted, but it wasn't long before need gripped them both and their movements became more and more urgent, frenzied.

They reached their peak at the same time, both bodies taut, pressed against each other, before spiralling down and down into the never-ending waves of pleasure.

Ajax's body was heavy over Erin's for a long moment. She revelled in it, holding him to her as the breeze whispered over their sweat-slicked skin. And before she could stop it the ebbing waves of pleasure were pulling her down into a deep state of relaxation.

She didn't notice when Ajax pulled free of her body and went to the bathroom, nor, when he came back and got back into the bed beside her, pulling the sheet over them and curling himself around her body.

When Ajax woke he was alone in the bed. Dawn had broken. It was the second time Erin had left the bed before he'd woken, making him feel exposed. Discombobulated. On all counts where this woman was concerned nothing had ever gone to plan.

Like his intention to keep the boundaries between them in spite of his desire. But last night...in that flimsy, silky jumpsuit...the boundaries had been burnt to ash. He'd almost taken her in that elevator. The second time he hadn't been able to control himself in a confined space with her.

Clearly there was unfinished business between them, and he wouldn't feel a sense of control again until whatever this was between them had burnt itself out. If he hadn't let her go when he had, nearly two years ago, maybe he would have known about her pregnancy at the start and things would be very different now.

How, exactly?asked a sly voice.

Ajax ignored it. He got out of bed and showered and dressed.

He heard the sound of the baby's babbling before he saw her. He felt a clutch of his gut, the urge to turn around and go in the opposite direction, but something made him stop. And go towards her.

Erin and Damia and Ashling—in a highchair—were on the terrace, having breakfast. They all looked at him, and Ajax fought down the prickling feeling of panic and exposure.

He met Erin's eyes. As before, when they'd slept together that first time, she looked composed and as if nothing had happened. Her hair was still damp from showering. She looked fresh in a sleeveless top that turned out to be a sundress, he saw, when she stood up momentarily to pick up the spoon Ashling had dropped to the ground.

The housekeeper came out with coffee for Ajax. He sat down. Damia excused herself and left them alone. Ajax willed Erin to look at him, but she was fussing with Ashling, who was looking at him with big eyes—brown and green, like her mother's. Other than that, she'd inherited his colouring. Thick dark hair and dark golden skin.

It was the first time he'd really taken her in, and something about that shamed him now.

As if sensing his focus on her, the baby held out the spoon she'd just dropped. Ajax knew he was on shaky ground, and that if he stayed here, engaged with her, he would be blasting apart the walls that had protected him for the last few years.

He was taking a risk. But he couldn't look away from her.

In spite of the fear, he put out a hand. ‘For me?'

Ashling smiled. Something turned over in Ajax's chest.

He took it. ‘Thank you.'

She smiled again, showing glimpses of emerging teeth. When he glanced at Erin she was looking at him warily. But then she schooled her expression and went back to feeding the baby what looked like a mixture of yoghurt and fruit.

‘You were up early,' he said.

A little colour washed into her cheeks. ‘I didn't want the baby to wake you.'

‘Her name is Ashling,' Ajax pointed out, with not a little irony.

Ashling reacted. ‘Abba!'

‘I don't think it was a good idea...last night,' Erin said in a low voice, as if he might not know what she meant.

Everything in Ajax rejected that. ‘I think it was inevitable.'

She shook her head. ‘We shouldn't...again.'

‘No one is forcing you into anything, Erin.' He watched more colour flood her cheeks. Good. Maybe she was remembering that she'd been with him every step of the way last night.

She looked at him. ‘It's not that I don't want to...it's just not a good idea.'

‘Probably not,' agreed Ajax. ‘But I think it's obvious that it won't be finished until we've let it run its course.'

She wiped Ashling's mouth and looked at him, ‘You make it sound like a virus.'

It was a kind of virus—in his blood. A hot and urgent virus. And it was the same for her and they both knew it.

Damia came back out and took Ashling to get washed and changed. The baby looked at Ajax over Damia's shoulder as they went out, her gaze seeming far too old for her age. As if she knew the turmoil she caused inside him.

‘We're going into Athens to go sightseeing today,' said Erin. ‘It's a bit cooler with the clouds.'

Ajax looked back at her. ‘We?'

‘Me and Damia and Ashling.'

‘I'll arrange for you to have a driver.'

Erin protested. ‘We can get a taxi or use public transport.'

Ajax shook his head. ‘Non-negotiable.'

Erin looked as if she wanted to argue, but eventually she said, ‘Okay—fine.'

Ajax got up and went over to where Erin sat. He put his hands on the arms of the chair either side of her. He saw how her pupils enlarged and the colour in her cheeks grew more hectic. His blood hummed.

‘I enjoyed last night.'

She looked up at him. He could see the resistance in her expression, in her eyes. She wanted to lie. To refute it. But she couldn't.

She seemed to sag a little. ‘So did I.'

He stood up and couldn't stop a smile.

She scowled at him. ‘Is that it?'

He put out his hands. ‘Are you trying to invite me to make love to you here on this terrace, right now?'

He turned and walked away, chuckling, and then felt something hit him between his shoulder blades. He turned around. It was a small pain au chocolat.

Ajax picked it up and backed away, still facing Erin. He took a bite and exclaimed with relish, ‘Almost as delicious as—'

She threw another pastry at him and Ajax let out a laugh.

It only occurred to him as he was driving to the office in Athens that he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so light.

Later that day Erin and Damia were wilting in the heat. They'd stopped to sit outside a café in the shade. Ashling was in her buggy, with a muslin cloth shading her and a fan blowing cool moist air over her sleeping form.

Erin loved how child-and-baby-orientated the Greeks were, fussing over Ashling everywhere they went. It seemed to be so at odds with what Ajax had said about his family—but then they weren't exactly mere mortals.

Erin smiled at Damia. ‘Thank you for being tour guide today. You were fantastic and your English is superb.'

The young woman blushed and smiled. ‘Efharisto, Erin. And your Greek is really coming on.'

Erin lifted her glass of chilled water in salute. She was doing her best to pick up some Greek, feeling that it was only respectful to do so.

Damia's gaze went to something behind Erin just as the back of her neck prickled with awareness.

Ajax appeared at her elbow.

She knew it was him before she saw him.

‘Good afternoon, ladies, I trust you've had a good time?'

Erin smiled up at him, hating the way her body went into roadrunner mode, her pulse skyrocketing. ‘Lovely, thank you. Athens is an amazing city.'

‘Well,' he said, ‘if it's all right with you, Damia, I'd like to steal Erin away.'

Immediately Erin protested. ‘That's not fair. She's been out with me all day—she shouldn't have to work into the evening too.'

Now Damia protested. ‘It wasn't work, really, and of course I don't mind. Do you want me to take Ashling home? It's almost time for her supper anyway.'

Erin felt a little redundant. After a year of being a single parent, suddenly she wasn't alone any more.

Reluctantly, she said, ‘If you're sure you don't mind?'

Damia shook her head. ‘Not at all.'

Ajax said, ‘Damia has agreed to come back to the island with us when we go tomorrow. She'll work with us for the duration of your visit.'

Erin looked at the young woman, ‘Can you do that?'

‘I have the summer off to work and learn English, and working for you ticks both those boxes. Plus, I'll get to visit my great-aunt.'

It was all working out so seamlessly Erin felt suspicious—but she wasn't even sure of what she should be suspicious. This was a world where things appeared as if by magic and there were no obstacles.

Damia stood up and gathered up their things. The driver parked nearby and Erin lifted Ashling out of the buggy. She was a heavy weight, still dead to the world.

She woke up briefly when she was installed in the baby seat at the back of the car, but after a sleepy smile at Erin fell asleep again. Erin gave instructions to Damia, told her to call her if Ashling wasn't settling, and then they drove off.

‘She'll be fine with Damia,' Ajax said.

Erin felt prickly and disgruntled, and all for no reason she could put her finger on. It was this man...inserting himself under her skin.

‘I'm just not used to this level of support.'

‘You'll have this level of support whenever you want it now. Money isn't an object.'

Erin rolled her eyes. But she still found it intimidating, Ajax's level of wealth. ‘It's not all about the money. I don't mind caring for my daughter.'

‘If you go back to work full-time you'll need a nanny.'

Erin stopped. She hadn't even realised that they were walking away from the café. Ajax must have paid their bill.

She looked at him. Work... She hadn't even thought about work. She was in danger of forgetting an outside world existed.

That revelation didn't help her prickliness subside.

She thought of what he'd said about working full-time. ‘I never mentioned going back to work full-time. Not explicitly.'

Ajax shrugged. He was wearing sunglasses. Together with chinos and a dark blue short-sleeved polo shirt he looked like a movie star.

‘I just assumed. You're good at your job.'

They continued walking. The early-evening air was still balmy. Erin just wore a light top tied around her waist over the sundress, and her cross-body bag. She resembled every other tourist there. The prickliness faded, She realised in that moment that she felt more carefree than she could recall feeling in some time. If ever.

It was an unwelcome revelation when she was with someone who didn't inspire feelings of carelessness or freedom. But since she'd noticed that little moment at breakfast, when Ajax had interacted with Ashling, albeit briefly, it had felt as if there'd been a subtle change in the air. Signifying what, exactly, Erin didn't know—and she wasn't sure if she wanted to know. For some reason she didn't want to dwell on it, sensing some kind of danger.

She diverted her mind back to what Ajax had said. ‘You're good at your job.'

She stopped walking again. ‘I am good at my job.'

‘You are.'

But something was striking her now. She continued walking and said, ‘You know... I just automatically pursued the career that I had the most aptitude for without ever really stopping to think about it. My parents are both academics, and the standards they set were high, but they never put pressure on me. It was all my own pressure.'

‘Are you saying you don't really want to be an attorney?'

Erin's stomach lurched at that audacious idea, but she felt something like a fizzing excitement. ‘I don't know... I know that I'm not missing my job as much as I thought I might. And I know that working full-time and leaving Ashling with nannies is not something I want.'

‘You can do whatever you want, Erin. You're qualified to choose from a myriad of roles.'

She hadn't thought about it like that before. And she certainly wouldn't have had Ajax Nikolau down as a careers advisor. But since he'd told her about the expectations his family had put on him and his brother she was realising that her experience hadn't been that dissimilar.

Ajax came to a stop outside a boutique. In the window mannequins were dressed in jewel-coloured gowns.

Erin quipped, ‘Not quite your colours, but I'm sure you'd look great in them.'

‘Ha-ha.' Ajax took her elbow in his hand. ‘Not for me—for you.'

Erin resisted. ‘But Georgiana has brought more clothes than I could wear in a lifetime.'

‘Indulge me,' Ajax said. ‘There's an event next week, hosted by my family, and it will require something...specific.'

‘What kind of event?'

‘An annual family gathering.'

Erin could feel her blood drain south. ‘Is it a good idea for me to meet them?'

‘You're the mother of my child,' Ajax pointed out.

‘A child you don't intend having much to do with.'

Ajax's jaw clenched. ‘Maybe I'm rethinking that.'

Alarm bells rang. ‘What's that supposed to mean?'

He ran a hand through his hair. He obviously really didn't like being questioned. Well, tough. He couldn't flip-flop like this about something as important as his daughter.

‘Something you said about Theo's death having a profound impact on me... It made me think. I realised that my motivations in staying out of Ashling's life are based on fear. Blind, irrational fear. And that's not good enough. For me or her. Or you. You both deserve more.'

Erin was speechless. She knew she should be welcoming this development but for some reason she felt unsettled. Maybe because she didn't trust that he meant it? Or thought that he would change his mind? She was only protecting her daughter after all.

Ajax arched a dark brow over his glasses. ‘I thought you'd be happy.'

Erin flushed. ‘Of course I am. But if you make any connection with her now it will cause upset if you can't continue.'

‘I'm aware of that. That's the last thing I want to do.'

Erin knew instinctively that he would be a good father. His devotion to his nephew told her that. So why wasn't she more happy about this change of heart?

‘Shall we?' Ajax indicated the boutique.

She'd forgotten about it. Up to now Ajax hadn't wanted to be involved and Erin had resigned herself to getting on with their lives without him. But now she felt as if she was on shifting sands, and suddenly she wasn't sure where they were headed any more.