CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FOUR

A LICE WONDERED WHERE this passionate side of her had been hiding all her life. Simon had certainly not managed to locate it and yet she had never given that a second’s thought; she had simply accepted that love was something calm and controlled.

Maybe it was, she thought now in a muddled way, thrilling to his approach as he settled on the mattress and began the business of enjoying the view .

Maybe love was calm and controlled but this thing she felt wasn’t love—it was desire.

In hindsight, she might not have loved Simon, although she’d been super-fond of him. She’d certainly never wanted him, not like this, not with this feeling of her whole body going up in flames.

Mateo tugged down the lined leggings which she had worn, because she’d known that they’d hardly be visible under his sweater, which almost reached her knees. She was breathing quickly as the leggings were stripped off and she squeezed her eyes tightly shut to block out any rush of self-consciousness at the sight of her pale thighs exposed to his roving gaze.

He was so beautiful and she was so... nothing to write home about .

‘Don’t...’ she heard him murmur softly. She opened one eye to look at him and saw that he was smiling.

He abandoned the striptease and moved to lie alongside her, then he manoeuvred her so that they were looking at one another, her breasts pushing against his chest, her bare legs against his.

‘Don’t what?’ she asked, both eyes open now, but shyly.

‘Close your eyes. How can you enjoy what I want to do to you if you’re not looking at me?’

‘You’re so beautiful, Mateo.’

He burst out laughing and, when he looked at her next, his gaze was hot and the smile was still lingering there.

‘So are you. And you’re so refreshing...and sexy...and funny...’

‘You’re just saying that.’

‘Open your eyes and enjoy the way I touch you...like this.’

Alice kept her eyes locked to his as he slipped his hand underneath the crotch of her underwear and wriggled his finger into her wet crease until he found the pulsing bud of her clitoris. She gasped, squirmed and then gripped his shoulders. The thick sweater was an impediment and her breasts felt heavy and sensitive underneath it.

‘See how much better that is?’ he purred with silky assurance. ‘It’s even better when we talk...and I don’t mean make small talk about the weather; I mean something a little raunchier than that. Maybe we’ll leave that for the moment. For the moment...just keep your eyes open. Let me see the expression on your face when I touch you.’

Alice was in a world she’d never known existed. An explosion of desire burst inside her like a firecracker and she fumbled, tugged and unclasped until not only the cloying sweater had been removed, but the vest and bra underneath. Her eyes were very much wide open as she took in his rampant, masculine appreciation at the sight of her breasts.

It was an out-of-body experience, something she had never imagined possible. She was no longer Alice Reynolds who had always stuck to the straight and narrow, and in whom principles of what was and wasn’t expected had been embedded. She’d burst through those barriers into a whole different world and was, just for now, just in this instant, a reckless, wanton woman with needs that shocked her.

She groaned, writhed and kept looking as he straddled her and sank to explore her breasts with his hands, mouth and tongue. He took an engorged nipple into his mouth and tugged the straining bud until she was on the point of coming even though his fingers were no longer teasing her down there.

It was so erotic, so exquisite. There was no room for inhibitions of any kind as he suckled on her nipples and then explored further, licking a delicate trail down her stomach and finding the place he had found with his finger but this time with his tongue. The intimacy of it made her want to squeeze her legs shut but he parted her thighs and, when he began to lick her, she had to stifle the guttural cries of pleasure that wanted to find a way out of her.

The rise of passion bursting its banks was unstoppable and she spasmed against his exploring mouth, her whole body shuddering and arching. Her mind went completely blank and, when the final quivers subsided, their eyes met and he gave a satisfied smile. He fumbled to find his wallet and produced a condom, which made her think vaguely that this was a guy who took no chances.

Her body was still throbbing, gearing up for that final, deep satisfaction that would come from feeling him inside her, and she parted her legs and opened up to him with eagerness and rising desire.

He thrust into her and a reservoir of pleasure she hadn’t even known she’d been holding back raced through her and she came again, her rhythm matching his, their bodies perfectly tuned, reaching orgasm at the same time.

It was joyful...earth-shattering and glorious. If she’d thought that the reckless, wanton woman would go back into hiding when the sex was over, then she’d been wrong. The door he’d unlocked was still wide open as he settled next to her, his arm shielding his face as his body began to unwind. She curved against him and gently rested her hand on his chest.

‘How was that?’ he murmured.

‘Very nice, thank you.’

‘And to think that I was looking for a more exuberant response.’

But there was laughter in his voice and she smiled against him. ‘Is it always like that for you?’ Alice murmured drowsily.

‘It’s been known. Want to have a shower? Head down with me so that something can be done about dinner?’

‘I’d completely forgotten about that.’

‘Sex does that to a person. Makes you forget what’s happening out there in the big, bad world.’

That made Alice think of the big, bad world he referred to, otherwise known as reality . She would be back in school in a matter of days. She hadn’t phoned her parents, but she would, just as soon as she returned home. Their gentle questioning and eager interest in how her holiday had gone would be a timely reminder that what she was enjoying now was very far removed from her day-to-day life. This flare of attraction had hit them both like a ton of bricks but it wouldn’t do to forget that it had only happened because they were stuck here in his lodge, snowbound.

Would their paths ever have crossed otherwise? Not in a month of Sundays. Forget about how different their backgrounds were—they just weren’t compatible on any level. She might have taken time-out here from the person she really was but that person would be back in just over a week: cheerful, dependable, easy going...and still looking for the guy of her dreams, who might not be Simon, but certainly could never be someone like this man who had made her body sing.

She would still want a guy who was dependable and steady, the sort of guy that Mateo might find boring, but who would be the guy who would stand by her through the years until they were old and surrounded by kids and grandchildren. She would still want normal but with a guy she adored rather than a guy she was fond of. Normal would still be the desired goal.

There was a reason people made such a big deal about the differences between love and lust: one was for ever and the other was for five minutes.

‘Want to shower with me?’ He broke through her thoughts, his voice low, husky and sexy.

‘Really?’

‘Never done that before?’

‘Not as such.’

Mateo laughed. ‘What does not as such mean? You took your clothes off, tested the water and then told that guy you dumped that it wasn’t the right temperature, maybe another time?’

‘Very funny.’

‘You’re very sweet, Alice.’

‘Is that a good thing?’

‘It’s an unusual thing, at least in my world. In my world, the women aren’t sweet.’

‘What are they?’

‘They’re...experienced. Blushing—which you do so well, might I add—is something they left behind before they hit thirteen. You’re an only child... Where did you grow up—in London? What do your parents do?’

Alice hesitated. For the first time the thought of admitting that her dad was a vicar felt somehow a little embarrassing. She’d had a pretty idyllic childhood all told, but to this worldly guy, who dated experienced women and had had a tragic background, her relatively uncomplicated life might seem a bit dreary.

She laughed at herself for being silly.

‘Well, I was born in a tiny village in Wales, but my family moved to Surrey when I was still quite young.’

‘Quite a culture shock I’d imagine. Did you have relatives there? Did your father get a job transfer?’

‘You could say it was a job transfer, yes...’ She sighed and looked at him a little sheepishly. ‘My dad’s a vicar, you see.’

‘Your dad’s a vicar ?’

‘There’s no need to sound quite so shocked,’ Alice said defensively. ‘Lots of people are vicars!’

He stared at her. In the darkness, she could make out the glitter of his eyes and the shadowy angles of his beautiful face. What was he thinking?

‘Makes sense.’ His voice was neutral and his eyes were serious. ‘There’s an innocence to you.’ It was his turn to sigh. ‘This was a mistake.’

‘What?’

‘This...us...making love: a mistake.’

‘Please don’t say that,’ Alice whispered. ‘Didn’t you enjoy it?’

‘Of course I did. But, Alice, like I said, I date women with experience, women who know the score when they sleep with me, and by that I mean women who understand that I’m not in it for the long term. They have no illusions. They’re not looking for any happy-ever-afters with me. I suppose I should have made that clear at some point before we hit the bedroom but...’

‘Why? Why would you have wanted to make that clear?’

Alice forced a laugh, only to find it turning into a genuine one. Hadn’t she just been thinking that she could never fall for a guy like Mateo? Weren’t they on the same page, neither interested in anything but living in the moment? She didn’t regret what they had just done, even though she knew that maybe she should. Or at least maybe she should ask herself searching questions about how she could have jettisoned the part of her that took the sanctity of relationships as given without any thought at all.

She had never imagined that the only guy she dated would be the one she married, even though it had almost turned out that way; but she had always believed that a person didn’t just hop in the sack because they happened to be attracted to someone. She had always believed that relationships had to mean something.

‘Look,’ she said firmly. ‘I know what this is all about. It’s about sex. We’re attracted to one another, but there are no strings attached, and I’m not going to be looking for anything once the snow melts and I get out of here.’ She met his brooding gaze and grinned. ‘You’re so egotistical.’

‘What are you talking about?’ he said, frowning.

‘You’re good-looking and you’ve been spoiled. You feel you’ve got to give women a bracing talk on not getting over-involved because you’re a commitment-phobe. You think that every person you sleep with is out for more than you’re prepared to give! You’ll just have to accept that I’m not one of them.’

‘You are nothing like anyone I’ve ever dated,’ he agreed, gently pushing her hair back and then letting his hand cup her face.

‘I don’t want anything from you.’

‘And I like that.’

‘I certainly would never be interested in any guy who was a commitment-phobe.’

‘Wise game-plan.’

‘Can I ask why, though?’

Mateo looked at her. She was so fresh-faced and, just for a second, he was tempted to spill out his life story. The temptation came as a shock. He felt as though he was being sucked down into something over which he had no control, a rabbit hole. Some crazy place where he was tempted to let go and see what happened next.

It was enough for him abruptly to step back. Control had got him where he was in life. He had controlled his time, his energies and his focused climb to the top. He had lived through the sadness and despair that had ruined his father when he had lost the love of his life. From his own place of quiet grief—with no one to turn to, because it had felt as though his father had been taken from him along with his mother—he had learned the value of never handing control of his life to someone else.

His love life, after the horror story of Bianca, had been even more controlled, if anything, and after she had showed up asking for money years after their divorce nothing in his life had been left up to chance.

The fact that he had already played fast and loose by allowing his physical attraction to the woman staring at him now to dictate his behaviour was an uncomfortable fact. He had no intention of compounding his lapse by launching into a self-indulgent revisiting of his past or contemplating rabbit holes full of unknown outcomes.

‘You can go right ahead and ask.’ He tempered the coolness of his voice with a smile. ‘But I’ll be sticking to “no comment” on that one. And, now that we’ve had this illuminating conversation, can I entice the sexy vicar’s daughter into a little more mutual physical exploration, or will it be shower and something to eat...?’

‘Food beckons,’ Alice murmured drowsily.

‘Agreed.’ Mateo’s voice was laced with amusement. ‘It’s important to have stamina when it comes to the business of making love...’

The driving force of the snow eased off but somehow it was agreed that two nights together would become two more.

‘Why not?’ They’d been in bed at one-thirty in the afternoon, lazy and content after making love, and Mateo’s voice had been soft and persuasive. ‘We haven’t exhausted the passion between us yet, have we? I certainly haven’t. I haven’t even been tempted to go out there and put the skis on, which is a first for me. So phone your friends and tell them that the kindly family who rescued you from the blizzard want you to stay on until they leave.’

‘I’m not sure I mentioned anything about a kindly family,’ Alice had returned drowsily, but her mind had already been racing ahead, eagerly accepting his proposition and mothballing the little voice inside her warning her that she was playing with fire.

It had only been a couple of days but he had cast a spell over her. She’d never met anyone like him. She still didn’t know that much about him, aside from the skeleton list of facts he had given her in passing, but she didn’t care, because what she did know was that he was clever, thoughtful, witty and mind-blowingly sexy.

Could stolen time feel more glorious?

She’d made a something and nothing excuse about staying on to her friends, which might have been a little problem, given her limited amount of clothing, but that hadn’t mattered because lots of the time was spent without any on at all.

‘I’ll make it up to you,’ she had told Bea on the phone the day before. ‘It’s so rude, and I know we’d all banked on spending time together, but...’

But she’d discovered a selfish streak in herself and she just hadn’t been able to face the prospect of saying goodbye to Mateo. Not yet, not when she didn’t have to. And what was so wrong with grabbing this little window of fun and stepping out of her predictable comfort zone? That comfort zone would be waiting for her when she returned to London.

‘I just feel that to ski back for the sake of a day before we all leave, well, it feels more recuperative to...er...stay put and recover from my ordeal.’

And she would have another two fantastic days here with Mateo... She was being selfish but it had felt like taking charge of her decision making.

And today they would ski to the little town he had mentioned when she had first landed on his doorstep so that she could replenish her wardrobe. It all felt very clandestine and exciting.

Taking the stairs at a quick trot, she stopped and just gazed at Mateo, who was scrolling on his phone by the door, all black ski gear, his ski sunglasses on his forehead. He was all sexy, gorgeous male.

Not for a second did she regret staying on.

He glanced up at her and smiled slowly.

He’d surprised himself by giving in to impulse and asking her to stay with him for the rest of the time he was at the lodge. Having spent years valuing the sanity and solitude he got here, he’d done a complete about-turn.

She’d said yes, and he’d found that he’d been holding his breath, desperate for her to concur.

‘We could always drive. The snow stopped yesterday and the roads down to the town will be passable. No need to take to the slopes.’

He was talking, but mostly relishing the sight of her as she walked towards him. Her ski outfit hugged womanly curves that were still managing to keep him in a state of semi-permanent arousal. She’d tied her hair back and stuffed it into a colourful woolly hat, but tendrils had already escaped, and his fingers itched to twirl one of them round his fingers.

Frankly, he itched to do a hell of a lot more than that. He itched to release the weight of her heavy breasts straining against her stretchy top, to feel them in his hands, to lathe the big, blushing pink nipples with his tongue and mouth, to feel her responsive wetness between her thighs and hear her little cries when he touched her there.

‘If we leave now...’ he banished those pleasantly erotic images to savour when he could do something about them ‘...we can be there in twenty minutes and back here within a couple of hours. Lunch at one of the cafés might be nice.’

‘We should take a backpack for whatever I buy.’

‘Already thought of that. Let’s go; if we stay here much longer, I’m going to have to put this little trip on hold and take you back to bed.’

Alice laughed and told him they should take to the slopes and not go by car.

He was a brilliant skier. The conditions were now perfect for skiing: light, steady snow overnight had led to a cushioned, pillowy path down, with just enough grip for her to handle the challenging turns. He kept pace with her and she knew that he was slowing himself down. She was experienced but he took experience to a new level.

They made it to the town in under half an hour and it was as bustling and charming as she had expected, with shops—expensive boutiques catering for the expensive tourist.

Alice had tried to stop him from shopping with her but he’d raised his eyebrows and insisted on accompanying her into the shops. All seven of them, from what he could count.

‘You’ll be bored,’ she’d warned.

‘I never get bored looking at you. You could do a few twirls for me. I like the thought of that. I could sit and admire the view whilst smoking a cigar.’

‘You don’t smoke.’

‘True.’

Now, looking at her from under his lashes, Mateo knew exactly what was going through her head: the price of the things she was rifling through. The places here were all exclusive. The salespeople all resembled models and the shops were achingly modern and austere with the clothes arranged artfully on mannequins without heads.

‘Let me get this.’ He wasn’t sure whether this was the right thing to suggest or not, but the embarrassed hesitation on her face and the way she couldn’t quite meet his eyes stirred something fiercely protective in him.

‘Don’t be ridiculous!’

‘I persuaded you to stay. If it weren’t for me, you’d be back at your chalet with your friends and a suitcase full of clothes you’d brought with you.’

‘There’s no way I would accept anything from you, Mateo. I know you earn more than me; I’m not blind. But you’re still self-employed and I know what that means. You could be earning good money now but you never know what’s round the corner.’

‘My corners are pretty predictable.’

‘I still don’t want you getting me anything,’ she told him quietly. ‘I can’t afford much, but I don’t need much, and I’ve already eaten you out of house and home.’

He’d watched as she’d turned away and chosen the cheapest jumper on show and the cheapest waterproof trousers, along with one pair of grey jogging bottoms. It was such a novel experience, not paying for whatever a woman wanted, that he wasn’t sure whether to feel terrible or oddly pleased.

Or deceitful, considering she was oblivious to how much he was worth. He ruled the last out because he wasn’t deceiving her. He was simply living in the moment with a woman who was likewise doing the same. Within this scenario, what he earned or didn’t earn was irrelevant.

‘In that case,’ he said, shopping concluded as they stood outside, both of them briefly admiring the quaint buildings and the pretty tree-lined streets, ‘I insist on buying lunch. Like you said, I have more than you.’

He’d wanted to do more. He’d wanted to take her into some more shops, buy stuff for her, but knew better than to go near that suggestion.

A couple of hours later, they were back at his lodge, and he smiled wolfishly at her. ‘Okay, you denied me the masculine pleasure of treating you to whatever you wanted...’

‘I’m very independent like that.’ Alice laughed, standing on tiptoe to kiss him.

‘Didn’t you let your fiancé buy things for you?’

Mateo stripped off, dumping outer garments on hooks and ski boots on the ground, watching her as he did so.

‘That’s different, and anyway, there wasn’t much money flying around for unnecessary purchases.’

‘So that’s “he didn’t treat me to little surprise gifts because he was thoughtless”...’

Alice burst out laughing, her eyes warm and alight. ‘You bought lunch. I’ll cook for you in return.’ She looked at him, her expression trusting and open, a smile still playing on her lips. ‘Or, at any rate, I’ll give it a go.’

Mateo stilled. He had never done domesticity. He and Bianca had gone out, socialising with the glamorous crew that tagged along in the wake of successful sportsmen, and he had been a very successful amateur boxer with his admiring followers. But cosy nights in had been few and far between. Bianca had loathed cooking. They’d eaten out most nights, or else had takeaways, and in fairness he’d been living with his father when he’d been dating her. And post marriage they’d rented a place, but somehow the business of cooking for one another, watching telly and discussing long term plans had never materialised. They hadn’t had that sort of relationship. She’d wanted to socialise, and had wanted the thrill of being admired. There had been no room for domesticity in that scenario and that was just the way he’d liked it.

Buried deep inside him were too many memories of what that domesticity had felt like once upon a time, when he’d been a kid and the house had smelled of cooking and rang to the sound of laughter and love. His parents had been so in love. Domesticity, he’d decided a long time ago, was the flashpoint where want became need, and need became the sort of vulnerability that could be your undoing.

Mateo had always made sure that women didn’t get their feet under the table. That was always going to be the safe route. He could handle the woman who wanted glamour and the thrill of being envied and admired by other men. He could handle the women who were like his ex, because they were a known quantity. He liked it that way and the women he dated liked it that way as well. They enjoyed being treated to the very best money could offer and, as someone accustomed to being a loner, he was content with that. Enjoyment without emotional involvement: standard procedure.

He’d done the cooking since Alice had arrived, which was fair enough: his house, his food, his responsibility. But now, just like that, he realised how much he had confided in her, how much of himself he had exposed.

Suddenly he was gripped by an uneasy claustrophobia. Alice was chatting, moving to the fridge and whipping out stuff to make a meal. In the space of only a few days, she knew the layout of this kitchen as well as he did. Hell, when had that happened?

‘Like I said, things were different with Simon,’ she was saying. ‘Although, in fairness, we pooled our finances. He wasn’t thoughtless, although... Hmm; where do you keep the chopping boards, Mateo? I’m not up to your standard but I can produce something edible from what we’ve got in the fridge.’

‘Alice...’

His voice was raw and he shifted uncomfortably, raking his fingers through his hair, not knowing what to do or what exactly to say, just knowing that he felt threatened, that somehow he had to escape.

She did things to him, stirred things inside him, and he didn’t want that. He didn’t need it. He wasn’t going to start flinging doors open that led to places he’d spent his life protecting.

Alice knew from the driven urgency of his voice that whatever was on the tip of his tongue was going to be something she didn’t want to hear.

‘You’d rather cook yourself.’ She laughed nervously. She knew what this was about; of course she did. She could see it on his face. He’d warned her off and she’d... She only gone and developed feelings for him; only forgotten that this was time-out and that he was a guy who didn’t want her around once they left this bubble.

She felt tears sting the back of her eyes. How could this have happened? She’d thought herself so sorted when it came to what kind of guys she wanted in her life. Had the very nature of her background played a part in what had happened in this hideaway? Had she been so sheltered and so cosseted that she had never developed the truly tough streak that could guide her when it came to men? Surely, if that were the case, then this wouldn’t feel so right ? If that were the case, then this would feel like lust, instead of which it felt like...

She lowered her eyes and breathed in deeply, then she looked at him without flinching.

‘This is beginning to bore you, isn’t it?’ she said quietly.

‘This is beginning to...become too complicated.’

‘Why?’

‘Do I need to have a reason?’

‘No.’ She could feel her heart hammering inside her and her limbs were turning to jelly.

‘You deserve a reason,’ he said roughly.

‘I guess by “complications” you mean you think I’m getting too attached.’

‘Aren’t you?’

‘Because I offered to cook a meal for us?’ Alice cried, hands on her hips as she glared at him.

Dismay and downright terror at the thought that she really had serious feelings— loved him, even —made her fight back. He didn’t want her. He might still desire her, but he no longer wanted her around. They were getting a little too comfortable with one another. Alice steadied her breath. What was wrong with getting comfortable with someone? Teetering on a tightrope of confusion and indecision, she took the plunge. Being open, honest and truthful was always the right way to be. She’d been taught that. It was embedded in her DNA.

‘We get along,’ she said with driving sincerity. ‘Don’t we? Or am imagining that?’

‘I never said we didn’t.’

‘And the sex is great, terrific...the best. At least for me, and you seemed to enjoy the times we spent in bed making love.’

‘Again, ditto.’

‘Then why are you so scared that this is complicated? It’s straightforward, Mateo.’

‘Alice, you don’t get it.’

‘What we have could be something really good, really special! Don’t you feel that as well? I mean, I’m not saying that we’re going to end up walking down the aisle together or anything...’ She laughed nervously again but actually, in her head, she was toying with the seductive notion of this beautiful man asking her to marry him. Her heart fluttered. ‘But we could do it justice by seeing where it leads, don’t you think?’

‘Alice, I was married once before.’

Alice opened her mouth, closed it and stared at him in utter shock. The thought that he might have been married hit her like a bolt from the blue. She shuffled over to one of the chairs by the table, flopped into it and continued staring at him, open-mouthed.

‘What happened?’

‘What happened was a divorce,’ Mateo ground out, ‘after a short, unfortunate time together.’

‘I... I’m so sorry. You never said.’

‘Is there any reason why I should have? Alice, I told you that I wasn’t interested in anything beyond what we have here and now.’

‘I know.’

‘I’m not looking for a relationship. I had one of those and I will never repeat the mistake.’

‘But what about love?’

‘Not for me. In time, when singledom becomes a place I no longer wish to inhabit, then I’ll consider settling down with a woman like me—a woman who sees the practical side to a relationship and isn’t looking for a fairy-tale romance. A companion, in other words, who is as practical as I am when it comes to the concept of marriage, or at least cohabitation.’

Their eyes met. What else was there to say? Alice was comfortable with what she’d done and, if inwardly he sneered at her for speaking what was on her mind, then so be it. Once she left here, she would never set eyes on him again, but at least she would leave with her conscience intact and no regrets about letting pride stand in the way of truth.

And at least she hadn’t made a complete fool of herself by going the distance and actually confessing just how deeply ran her feelings for him.

‘Well,’ she said with a tight smile, ‘just for the record, it’s been fun. My mistake for thinking we could have a little more fun when we got to London. I’ll go get my stuff together and I’ll be out of your hair.’

‘It’ll be dark in an hour. You know you’re welcome to stay here for the night.’

‘You’ve seen how experienced a skier I am and the snow is good. I can make it back to my side of the mountain. The girls have gone, but it’ll be easy to rent somewhere for the night, and I can change my ticket by paying a fee.’

She didn’t give him the chance to prolong the conversation. She spun round on her heels and walked away.

Mateo watched her leave the kitchen. His stomach was knotted. Of course, this was the right thing. He’d taken his eye off the ball and allowed things to get out of hand. She wasn’t like him. She lacked the experience to put things in perspective.

He thought about that soft, sexy body and sweet, sexy personality and tightened his jaw. The truth was that this was good for her. He didn’t want to hurt her and she’d be hurt if she stuck around, if they continued this when they returned to London.

Reality had no room for it—not his reality. He couldn’t love, wasn’t interested in it, and it was always going to be better this way. He was never going to go down rabbit holes, so it was sensible to back away from their dubious, treacherous allure. So yes, maybe he’d felt something for her, maybe he’d had a moment of weakness because she’d caught him by surprise, because she was so different from his ex and every single woman who had come after his ex. But happiness was an illusion and he was way too cynical to trade in illusions.

He headed back out, back to the town. He’d get the cable up later when he knew she was gone.