Chapter 14

Rupert

Soft music plays in the background but is mostly drowned out by the chatter of hundreds of students just finishing their meals and getting ready for the next part of the evening. I look around the room, not really knowing who I'm searching for until my gaze lands on Erica. She's sitting at a table with people I don't recognise, laughing and seeming very much at ease.

"The arch came out great," Sami says.

"Huh?"

"The arch," he repeats, nodding towards where the ostentatious glittery white arch complete with streamers sits over the stage.

"It does look good," I agree. "The whole room does."

"Yes, we did a good job. I'm glad you and Erica were able to work together in the end."

"We were." At the mention of her name, I find her in the crowd again. She looks in my direction and raises a hand to wave.

I echo the gesture back to her, getting a groan from Sami in response.

"Seriously?"

"What?" I ask him. "You said you wanted time with D, so me and Erica spent time together."

"Yes, I know that. I'm more commenting on the fact you're so clearly into her."

"I'm not," I protest.

"Mmmhmm, of course you're not. And you said I was the one with an obvious crush. You can't stop looking at her, the two of you are seeking one another out when you can, and don't think I didn't notice that you took care of her when she was accidentally drunk."

"We're old friends," I insist.

"Other than the part where you weren't," Sami responds. "I'm not saying there's anything wrong with crushing on Erica. I like her, she's sweet even if she did do whatever it was to you."

"She lost my bouncy ball," I say. "But she got me a new one." Without intending to, I pull out the ball Erica gave me, running it between my fingers.

"And you just happened to bring it with you tonight?"

"It matches my bow tie." I hold it up to illustrate my point.

"A crush might be too weak of a word," Sami says. "You sound like you're way further gone than just a crush."

I'm about to reject what he's saying again, but pause and consider how I'm feeling instead. There's no doubt that I want to spend more time with Erica, and that I've been thinking of things that I haven't really thought of when it comes to her before, but that doesn't mean I want more. Does it?

"Oh."

Sami laughs. "Caught up, have you?"

"I do like Erica like that."

"Yep, very obviously so."

"Do you think she knows?" I ask.

"Yes and no," he responds cryptically.

I narrow my eyes at my friend. "Spill."

"Well, her body language says she's into it, but she's probably having some of the same thoughts you are about the fact that you're not friends because of some bouncy ball. So I'd say she's also probably in a bit of denial about it. On the other hand, D saw her chatting with that succubus from the cheer squad earlier, and if they're friends, then there's a chance she's told her."

"Which one is the succubus from the cheer squad?"

"Dark hair, deep purple dress, looks like she has an entire back tattoo," Sami says.

"I know who you mean," I say, recognition falling into place. "They're in a study group together, Erica said they're friends."

"In which case, I'd bet she already knows you're into her."

Conflicting feelings fill me. It's not that I don't want Erica to know, it's more that I'm not really sure what to do with the whole situation.

"What do I do?" I ask Sami.

"I guess that depends. If you want to go back to being mad at her all the time, then do nothing."

"And if I don't?" And I already know that I don't want that. It's been nice having her back in my life and I don't want to let her go again.

"Then you should stop talking about this with me and start talking about it with her."

"Right, yes, that makes sense." I look at the bouncy ball I'm still holding between my fingers and consider what he's saying and what the best way of approaching the conversation is going to be. I don't want Erica to feel pressured into anything.

Then again, maybe telling her how I feel now, when there's an entire summer where we definitely won't see one another if we don't want to, is the best course of action.

Sami leans in. "I'd suggest doing it now. Once the dancing starts, it'll be harder to talk."

"Right, yes." I stand up and slip the bouncy ball back into my pocket. I should have known this was going to happen the moment I decided to bring it with me tonight. There was really no reason for me to do that. "I'll see you in a bit."

"Good luck," Sami says.

I give my friend a nervous smile and head across the room to where Erica is sitting.

My stomach is all tied up in knots, but I can also feel that this is the right thing to do, and not just because Sami told me it was. The idea of not having Erica in my life has already been a difficult one to face, but now I'm thinking about whether we could be something more to one another, I'm finding it impossible to ignore that. And there's only one way that I'm going to be able to find out if I'm the only one feeling this way.

Erica looks up as I approach and smiles, causing my heart to constrict and everything to feel all kinds of different about the world.

"Hey," she says. "Everything all right?"

"Erm, yes. I was just wondering if we could talk."

"Sure. But it better not be about how you lost the bouncy ball," she jokes. "It's on you this time."

I let out an amused chuckle. "I still have it." I dig into my pocket and pull out the bouncy ball.

"You seriously brought it with you?"

Some of her friends are giving the two of us a strange look, but I ignore them. I'm sure she'll explain it all to them later.

"I wanted to show you that it matched my bow tie." I hold it up next to the material.

"I know, you sent me a photo."

"But I thought it would be better in person. Wow, that doesn't sound logical at all, does it?"

She laughs. "Not really, but I like it all the same. It matches your bow tie perfectly. What are the chances?"

"Probably low. I don't imagine that the bow tie and bouncy ball manufacturers talk to each other very much."

"Maybe they should," Erica responds. "There's probably an untapped market for people who want the two to match. I suspect the average age of those people is probably seven, but I can still see the appeal." Amusement dances on her face as she says it, lighting up her eyes and making her seem even more beautiful than normal.

"Or maybe not. It would be fun if everyone here was sporting a bouncy ball in their pocket. Fun never has an age limit."

"True, true."

"Erm, but I actually came over to ask if you had a minute. To talk." I expect the nerves to get worse after I've told her what I want, but they haven't. If anything, they've actually settled down a bit.

"Sure. I need a new drink anyway." She gets up and grabs her clutch from the table.

"Are you going to be okay, E?" one of her friends asks.

"I'm fine," she assures her. "I'll be back soon. Probably. If not, I'll message you."

"I'm sorry for taking you away from your friends," I say as we start to make our way over to the bar.

"You're my friend too." Her words send a painful stab through my heart even though I know she doesn't mean them precisely the way I've heard them.

And that's just one more reason why we need to have this conversation sooner rather than later.