Chapter 26

CHAPTER 26

Penn

I watched him leave and I just stood there.

Frozen, like an ice cube.

Mitchell said he loved me.

Granted, it was with my cock down his throat, but the admission itself struck me in the chest like Cupid’s arrow.

Time moved slowly and all at once as I tried to grasp onto those words, tried to keep them alive and in the air.

God, I fucking love you.

I’d never told anyone I loved them .

But at that moment, I wanted to say yes. Yes, I love you too.

But then I was distracted by Mitchell’s expert tongue and my impending orgasm, and the world around me disappeared.

Once again, I was at the mercy of Mitchell DeVille, and there was nothing I could do except ride out the bliss until I’d fallen back to earth.

I reached for him. I needed to touch him, to know he was real. I needed to tell him how I felt, but I was scared.

Everything was just happening so fast.

I could barely keep up with my own emotions, let alone the ones Mitchell had obviously buried.

I wanted to soothe him, to tell him it was okay.

I loved him too.

But the world around me slowed to a crawl as he dressed himself, kissed me, and left.

And I just let him.

Because I was afraid of chasing after him.

I was afraid he was running away from me .

I absentmindedly colorized my five bowls of frosting, numb to the world around me. I barely heard Archie when he spoke.

“What is with you today? Earth to Penn?” he said, waving a spatula in my face.

“This wouldn’t have anything to do with that photographer boy would it?” my mom’s voice cut through, bursting my bubble, as Archie screeched, “What?”

My Mom set down the tray of sugar cookies, which I needed to ice for the Pride Fundraiser we were working tonight.

She did not look at all phased.

“I mean, you two have been attached at the hip lately in a... non-friendly way.”

My cheeks heated immediately. “Mom!”

Archie laughed, but my mother only crossed her arms as I loaded the piping bags.

“What? A mother knows when her son is in love.”

I wasn’t sure how to proceed with her insinuation, but figured honesty was the best policy.

Even if it was uncomfortable .

“Yeah, well, it’s a bit more complicated than that.”

My mother grabbed the red piping bag to start working on a tray.

It reminded me of Mitchell, who’d just shoved his way into helping me just the other day, and I felt sick all over again.

What if I’d fucked up because I didn’t say anything?

Because I didn’t go after him?

What if he never wanted to see me again?

“Anything worthwhile isn’t easy.”

“Your mom is right, whatever happened, I’m sure it can be fixed,” Archie said.

I chewed my lips as I lined the cookies my mom passed down to me with blue lines.

“I just... should have told him the truth. But I didn’t.”

My mom settled her arm around me. “So tell him now. There’s no expiry on telling someone how you feel.”

I glanced up at her, feeling my heart catch in my throat as she rubbed my shoulders like she used to do when I was afraid. When I was a kid.

My voice shook as I fell apart under my mom’s gaze.

“Even if it’s a guy?”

My mom pulled me in close, wrapping me in a tight embrace and I hugged her, my shoulders loosening and my head buried in her apron.

“Baby, I wouldn’t care if he was an alien from Mars. As long as he makes you happy, that’s all that matters.”

I could feel Archie’s hand on my back as he softly spoke too. “When it’s right, it’s right, no matter who it’s with.”

Something inside me clicked, knowing that I had their support. That I wasn’t doing this alone, and as scary as it was, I had back up.

I had people who understood me and supported me.

And that included Mitchell.

The man I loved.

“Thanks, Mom,” I said as she broke our hug to return to her piping.

“You don’t have to thank me, sweetheart,” she said, and with that I knew exactly what I needed to do.