Chapter 11

CHAPTER 11

Penn

It was nearing nine thirty, and I knew I should go to sleep, but I’d been tossing and turning for at least an hour and couldn’t get comfortable.

Partially because I had gone over the past twenty-four hours in great detail. From my arrival at M’s Place, to that kiss , to Mitchell showing up today, to that weird, charged moment between us before he left.

Including Archie’s words.

Maybe you’re not as straight as you think, Penn .

I turned on my right side, my gaze falling on my laptop, its screensaver lighting up the darkness of my room like a salacious beacon.

It wasn’t that I had anything against porn, it just wasn’t something I ever experimented with. Mostly because I was afraid my parents would somehow find out and I’d get in trouble. Even when I went away to college, on my own, there was still that veil of taboo-ness that I couldn’t shake. I never considered myself a prude by any means, but suddenly, after that kiss, I was questioning a lot more than I ever thought I would.

Maybe I was overreacting.

Maybe I was just all keyed up because I was back home in Jasper Springs, Maybe, I was going through some early twenties crisis or something now that I had graduated or something.

Whatever it was, I felt this curious spark inside of me building, cresting with anxiety.

I was twenty-three years old. Surely, I could just watch a little porn. Prove Archie and his speculations wrong.

I crept over to my desk quietly, even though I knew both my parents were out like a light, and there was no way anyone would hear me. Anxiety swelled as I stuffed down the part of me who wanted to turn around and just say we did...

But I was an honest person, if anything, and maybe I was a little curious. Being someone who had no idea what the fuck they were doing, I fired up Google like any curious person would do, I’m sure, and googled “where to watch porn” like the complete idiot I was.

I randomly picked a link, hoping it would work.

Immediately, my vision was accosted with women on their knees, cum-stained mouths full of cock, and I shut the lid almost on contact.

Not because it turned me on, because I thought it was kind of gross, actually, but because I had started to wonder if it was a good idea.

“Jesus Christ, Penn, you’re a fucking adult, not some hornball teenager. It’s research, man, just skim a few videos and call it a night,” I said to myself, taking a deep breath before I opened the computer again.

I clicked on the first video again, letting it play as I leaned back in my chair. I didn’t dislike watching the big, beefy guy shove his cock down the woman’s throat, but I wasn’t really into her over-acting moans and her sticking her tongue out.

I watched intently as the man’s hands slid over his cock, his thumb brushing over the tip of his swollen head. God, the guy was enormous.

Was all porn like that?

Surely, there had to be some regular sized guys out there, right?

Noticing my thoughts were straying, I decided to try something else. A few seconds later, I was viewing a woman being bent over a countertop, with another large, muscled man fucking her from behind.

My cock twitched, as I watched him fist his hand in her hair, watched his slick, thick cock disappear into her ass. I licked my lips, sliding my own hand down beneath my boxers, feeling the smooth skin of my shaft against my palm.

See, Archie, totally straight .

I rubbed and tugged slowly, hardening as I continued to watch the man’s veins in his arms tighten with every grip of her hair, with every thrust of his cock against her ass. But then it was over in an instant as he pulled out, only to cum all over her, and...

And I was still no closer to coming myself than I had been when I started to watch.

This is ridiculous.

No one actually likes this stuff.

I had half a mind to just close it out, until I saw a gif on the side, something starring a bigger guy, with dark hair and deep eyes, who literally called to me and made me click.

I don’t know why or how, and I couldn’t even put it into words, but it was like I was just drawn to his aesthetic. He was hot, all tan muscles and wild hair, fiery eyes.

The video that came up on my computer showed him in the shower, the water running down his defined chest in rivulets and my cock sprang to attention.

There he was, standing there alone, running his large hands over his chest, through dark, chestnut hair, down his abdomen. The curve of his golden-skinned ass, the definition of his muscles... I watched as he tilted his head back, running his hand down to his...

I swallowed, hard, as I watched him grip his thick, pink cock, tugging at his length as he groaned.

It was like a train wreck. I literally could not pull my gaze away, and I didn’t want to.

I licked my lips again as I pulled at my own cock, feeling myself harden again with renewed vigor.

I watched him lean his hand against the tile, thrusting into his hand slowly.

Watched as his cock disappeared into his slippery, wet hand.

Then he looked up. The sound of the shower door opened, and I tensed. I don’t know what I was expecting, but an average sized, blond male, who looked to be about in his early twenties, stepped in. His body wasn’t as defined as the tall, dark, and handsome man pleasuring himself in the shower.

In fact, golden boy’s body kind of reminded me of my own. Soft around the edges, but trim enough that I had some shadow of a six pack.

Okay, well, technically, I had fallen off the work out train after I broke up with Amy, on account her friends were gym rats who practically lived at the university rec center.

I watched in curiosity as the smaller man came up behind the star of the show, who never broke character or turned around. I watched as golden boy lathered his hands up and down the man’s body, fingers splayed across muscles. Something in the way he touched him, smoothly, lazily, caused my cock to twitch as I watched him trail his lips over the other man’s neck, his fingers brushing along the other man’s hand.

My own hand built its rhythm as I felt my orgasm building deep in my balls, my cock stiff as a slab of marble. A fresh bead of precum dribbled from my slit and spread along my fingers. I let out a shaky breath as understanding dawned on me.

I liked what I saw.

For the first time in a long time, I felt connected to myself. I was enjoying something I often thought of as a nuisance or a chore.

My breathing hitched as I watched the golden boy drop to his knees, parting the man’s legs as he ran his tongue along the man’s ass, and then...

His fingernails dug into the man’s flesh as deep groans left his throat, and the man he was accosting—no, eating out —came without warning.

And so did I.

My breath shook as I cursed, my release coating the inside of my hand and my boxers. My cock pulsed, and my head fell back against the back of the chair, my eyes fluttering closed as I rode out the waves of the most intense orgasm I’d ever felt.

And when it was over, I opened my eyes, and the truth hit me like a ton of bricks.

Archie was right.

Maybe I wasn’t as straight as I thought.

And that changed everything.