Mistress A-0002

I t was never wise to anger the person who held the power. I’d told that to my father not long before I killed him. Back then it had been over a debate about my husband whom I’d been betrothed to from childhood. My father got what he wanted. Me as a LaRoe. I let him walk me down the aisle. I allowed him that time. I even calculated my own emotions to see if I had been overreacting. After all, I was used to having my father blame my behavior on disorders. I knew it was normal to lash out at injustices, and that’s what I saw the marriage as. But just like I knew when I made that threat during one of my episodes, I was right. My husband had been nothing but a weak pushover who was unaffected by my persuasion. He was unworthy of me, and I was doomed to a marriage I’d never escape. Not even with my gifts. It was hell. Time didn’t change the situation, and I found fulfillment in other ways.

But that could be ending now.

Elec knew we’d kissed. I wasn’t just ticked that my secret was out because of some stupid blank slate. With the mortification at getting caught and him possibly exposing me, came something deeper rooted. Something that was taking over every waking moment. Embarrassment. Insecurities. Ego. Mine was finding ways to destroy me. I couldn’t remember the last time I overcriticized myself. I wasn’t beautiful. For so long I lived in delusions, making everyone see me as something I wasn’t. I never did that with Elec. I hadn’t been trying to win him over with my looks. I just figured he’d never know about us. He knew me. He saw me for me, and there was something freeing in that when I’d been deep in my games. But now? No. The truth was out, and I suddenly couldn’t stomach that. The mortification drove me to Braddock’s. To banging on his door with no answer after he missed his appointment. Something told me it was bigger than him not wanting to see me. Had the Main Master seen the bigger picture? Was he suspicious? Or was this paranoia stemming from what I tried to hide? I almost didn’t care past my need for revenge over my embarrassment.

Elec… He knew what I’d done. Me. Ugly Melissa. That look he gave me when Allison had interrupted. Repulsion. Disgust.

“Soft but striking.” I met my slave, Muriel’s stare, finding myself looking down at the eyeshadow palette she held. “Make me beautiful. More beautiful than ever.”

“You’re already beautiful. Mistress…Melissa.” Her lips pressed together for the briefest moment. “You’ve barely left the apartment in the last three days. You won’t talk about what’s bothering you. Are you alright?”

A finger came to slide across the tear that slid down my cheek. She lowered to her knees, staring up at me from where I sat in my vanity’s chair. Muriel had been my companion since before the Gardens. My own personal servant from my household I’d stolen and brought here. She was my best friend. Sometimes my lover. She wasn’t but twenty-seven, much younger than me in my forties. I envied her beauty. I adored it.

Leaning forward, I cupped both sides of her head, sliding my palms over the soft dark color. We were opposites in almost every way possible. Where my hair was red, hers was nearly black. Where I had porcelain skin, hers was the most beautiful shade of golden tan, as if she’d been kissed by the sun itself. Even her eyes had yellow specks. If I loved anyone, it was her. She had more of my heart than my own kids. She was everything, and she worshipped me. Although I had her mind, there was no mind-bending with her feelings. She saw in me what others didn’t, and she stayed at my side for the last seven years by choice. At first, I thought it was the money but…she loved me, even if we never said the words.

“I don’t want to go out there today.” More tears fell as I closed my lids, brushing my lips into hers. “He knows. The Main Master.” My lids cracked, and I sobbed. It didn’t stop Muriel from moving into kiss me again.

“What does he know? Does he know everything?”

I sniffled, shaking my head.

“A stupid blank slate walked into my office and broke him from the trance. We were kissing.”

Muriel’s eyes scanned mine.

“Kissing? That’s it?”

“That’s enough. Elec.” My lids closed through the overwhelming truth. When I opened them, Muriel was patiently waiting. “You know him. I’ve told you all about him. He won’t rest until he’s blown this entire thing wide open. Right now, I can guarantee he’s reviewing footage of his every move.”

“But he won’t find anything, right? I mean, not of the two of you.”

My head shook. “Only three guards control the cameras and doors, and I’ve gotten to them all. Daniel Loxly, the leader, his sole mission is to serve me with whatever I need. He knows to cover my ass. Even if they did miss something,” I laughed, despite that the tears still came, “Elec won’t see us together like that. He can’t on film or even in mirrors. His mind will block us out. If we get too close, the video should distort. But only to him. His mind won’t accept it.”

“Really?” Muriel scanned my eyes.

“To him, I’m a ghost.”

“That’s…genius.”

“I couldn’t leave room for mistakes. But I did, and now...”

“No. Shh.” Muriel went back to pressing her lips to mine. “I’ll help you figure this out.”

“Elec won’t let this go. He trusted me. He’s going to dig and dig?—”

“Not if you tell him not to. Make him forget . You can do that.”

I could have argued. I could have explained how hard that would be now that I had altered that trust. I didn’t bother as I deepened the kiss. She wouldn’t understand how this worked.

“I have appointments.” I pulled back. “I’m a wreck. You have to fix me. Just…make me pretty. I need to be approachable. Trustworthy. But…”

“Sexy?”

I laughed at Muriel’s smile.

“Yes, sexy too. I want something different today.”

“What if we don’t do trustworthy?” Muriel bit her lip, grabbing my hands. “You’re the strongest person I know. Don’t cower behind this slip-up. Own it . Stare him down. Be unapologetic. Pretend you didn’t know he was even under. Act like he kissed you. He did this. Not you .”

“My guilt has already showed. I wanted to explain but…I sort of pulled the dismissive card when I collected my thoughts. It’ll be a mess, but I might be able to twist it in my favor. Just…work magic on me.”

“Magic? No magic. I’ll just be enhancing what is already beautiful. You are beautiful .” She kissed my cheek, standing to place down the palette. I quickly wiped the new tears that spilled.

Beautiful. If only everyone saw me like Muriel did. But they didn’t because it wasn’t the truth.

“It’s in the eyes.” Her voice lowered, and I tuned everything out but my thoughts as she began putting on my makeup. Elec would want an explanation. He’d want to know exactly what was happening. And then there was auction night. He wouldn’t miss that after asking whether or not he hurt me. He’d remember the dress and put two and two together. He’d wonder, and that was trouble. There had always been a risk, but I’d been careful. Pills. Shots. Condoms. I had always used some sort of protection with my victims over the years. After all, I’d learned from my mistakes so long ago.

But I wasn’t in the mindset I’d been in on the outside world. Six months of mostly being underground had screwed up my focus. After my body rejected the IUD I’d decided to get for birth control, I missed the last two shot appointments. Life underground was too hectic. Sessions. Masters. Games. Adrian…Elec. I didn’t think to grab a condom before I went to the lab. With Adrian it was all murder and making out. No sex. By the time Elec and I were in the room and I realized my mistake, it was too late. I hadn’t wanted to miss our time together. I thought I had it under control. With protection, we always finished with him coming in my mouth anyway. But not this time. Elec disobeyed and decided to become all caveman on me. Possessive bastard. It was my fault for turning our fucking into a semi love-making session. I only had myself to blame for that which wasn’t an issue until Elec found out about us. Now I had no choice…

“Are you almost done? I’m going to be late.”

“Finishing up now.”

I didn’t answer or nod. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt so nervous. I tuned into the sensations. To the racing heart. To the butterflies in my stomach. It was very similar to…a thrill. It really wasn’t so bad. After all, Muriel was right. This was Elec’s fault. He did this, not me. Maybe he even forced himself on me during our session on auction night. I smiled at the thought.

“There. Done. What do you think?”

Muriel stepped back giving view of the vanity’s mirror. My lips parted and I scooted closer, taking in her work. My eyes…I never wore eyeliner, and she’d put it on me, light enough to be visible but not bold enough to take the focus from my long lashes. The eyeshadows were in natural shades of brown, darkening around the end so to close off the eye. I stood, throwing my arms around her neck.

“You’re the best. Thank you.”

Her arms tightened. “Of course. Today is going to be amazing. You’re Mistress Two. You’re the most powerful, beautiful person in this place.” She pulled back. “I know the perfect outfit for you to wear. Come.”

I gave her the control. I even let her dress me. It wasn’t something I did often, but the more I watched her, the more I wanted to just hold her and disappear. At least for another day.

“Perfect. Black is a power color, and the dress hugs all the right places. It sets the stage. How do you feel?”

“Better. I’ll be back in a few hours. What are your plans?”

“I thought I might go shopping in the city. Will you be home for lunch? Dinner?”

I slid on my watch, grabbing my purse.

“I’m not sure. I have to make up my appointments from the last few days. Adrian will want to see me after my silence. He showered me with two slaves, literally, and I haven’t seen him since. I don’t even want to think about his mindset right now.”

“You’ll fix it. He adores you. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”

“You’ve seen that?”

I smiled, watching a slight blush tint her cheeks.

“I was getting coffee a week or so back and you were both talking in the lobby. He looks at you like he’s in love with you.”

“In a way, he is.”

“Mistress.” Her tone dropped as she stepped in. “Don’t let what happened with the Main Master get to you. It will pass. You’ll see.”

“I really hope so. If not…God, I don’t want to think how bad it will get. I don’t want to have to kill him. I’ve put in so much work. I made him. To throw that away would be catastrophic.”

“He’ll forget or think it’s his fault. Keep your head high. You’re wonderful and everyone knows it. Even him.”

“You’re right.”

“Go, get to work. I’ll be here when you get back.”

I nodded, grabbing my cell and heading for the door. I didn’t turn back to look at her. I couldn’t today. I had to focus. I had to find Elec and squash this once and for all.

Dialing, I shut the door behind me, walking towards the elevator. Ringing sounded in my ear, making me frown as voicemail eventually clicked on. I pushed the elevator button, cursing as I waited. As the door was opening, my phone rang. My pulse jumped.

“Main Master.”

“No, this is Nineteen.”

I pulled back my phone, taking in the number to our High Leader. Dammit.

“Nineteen.”

“The Main Master is busy with a developing situation. He wanted me to take a message.”

I stepped into the elevator, hitting my intended floor.

“Tell him we need to talk. It’s important. I’ll be in my office. I have a few sessions today, but I’m free when he can spare a few minutes.”

“I’ll be sure to tell him.”

“Thanks.” I hung up, breathing through the worry. Elec was busy. He wasn’t avoiding me; he was busy. Busy. Fuck.

The doors opened, and I dialed the extension of my guard, Loxly.

“Mistress Two, how can I help you?”

“I need you to dial me out of the Gardens. I need to contact my patient, Hale Rivers. Can you put me through?”

“Yes, Mistress. Give me a moment.”

The line went on hold, and I headed for the coffee cart, seeing the lobby busier than usual. The slave who worked the cart smiled as I approached, already starting my order.

“Hale Rivers.”

“Hale, it’s Melissa. I wanted to check in to see how you were doing after our meeting a few days ago.”

A pause. “Melissa, I was going to come see you today.”

“See me? I thought you were leaving the country.”

“I didn’t go. I…I think I’ll be returning to the Gardens soon. I have some things to tie up.”

I grabbed my coffee, throwing the slave a smile as I turned, heading towards my office.

“Coming back? Hale, in your session you told me that you believed Elec messed with your mind. That he offered you a position as a Master and that you believe he made you want to accept it. I put you under. I cleared your mind of anything he might have said. Do you think I failed or missed something?”

“I don’t know what to think. I was going to talk to Sebastian about it, but I changed my mind. He’s in Chicago and busy with work. I was going to come back to talk to you, but…I’m not sure I’m ready to be back yet.”

“Because you’ll want to stay.”

It wasn’t a question. I shoved my door open. Elec outsmarted me again. What was he doing that didn’t allow me to alter his own commands. It made no sense.

“Come back when you can. I’ll be here for you when you do. You can call me any time. I’m here for you.”

“Thanks, Melissa. Mistress,” he corrected.

“Absolutely. Take care, Hale.”

I hung up, spinning as my door flew open. Deep breaths had me studying my son.

“Jett, what’s going on?”

“I’ve done it. Well, not exactly as I had hoped. It was pure accident, but it happened.”

“What are you talking about?”

“It’s all so damn fascinating. The brain ,” he rushed out. “I killed the first two slaves. I mean, I’m not a medical student. Lobotomies aren’t taught in private school?—”

“Wait,” my hand rose, but I didn’t immediately speak. “The first two? …This isn’t just about the power to you. You’re truly serious about this path.”

“Mom.” He closed the distance between us, the biggest smile on his face. “I’ve never wanted anything more. For months I’ve been nonstop studying every paper and article I can find. I was almost afraid to try so soon, but I couldn’t resist. I didn’t kill this one . She’s alive. Drooling and sort of ‘out of it’, but she’s alive . The screaming stopped. She doesn’t even get afraid when I get close.”

I couldn’t help but mirror his smile.

“Great job. What you’ve done is no easy task for a beginner.”

“You’ve done it too?”

The pure captivation as Jett looked at me sent warmth into my chest. Perhaps he wasn’t so bad all the time.

“Countless times. I used to help your grandfather experiment when I was in high school. Not on his patients, but to…special cases.

“Please tell me he recorded it.”

“Of course he did. He’s recorded all of them. Documentation is important, after all.”

“Oh my God, Mom, you have to bring them here. I need to watch everything he’s ever recorded.”

I laughed at his enthusiasm. “You’re in for quite the journey if you’re going to watch them all. Luckily for you, I have them here at the Gardens. I’ll contact Dr. Milsap and have him retrieve you the first box. You can start at the beginning. You can see how far we came.”

“We? Are you in all of them?”

“Oh, no, although I did witness most. I’m talking about where your grandfather started and where me and Elec picked up. Jett…” A mix of emotions, nostalgia and sadness, twisted in my chest. “Elec and I did some amazing things. We took grandfather’s work so far. I mean…look at the blank slates we have. Elec really embraced that part of our work. It was never my passion, just fun. He, on the other hand, has a great love for it. He’s come far, and I hope you can take it the rest of the way.”

I could tell he didn’t like the mention of Elec, but his excitement was still intact. “Thank you, Mother. I hope so too. Do I just head down to the lab or…?”

“No, they won’t let you in. I’ll have Dr. Milsap have one of the guards drop it off at your apartment.”

“Excellent. I can’t wait. I’ll…just be in the city until then. Just tell them to call me when they’re headed up. I’ll meet them there.”

I nodded, watching Jett as he smiled over his shoulder. He shut the door behind him, and I frowned at the memories of me and Elec. We’d had such amazing moments back then. Hot sex. Savage, couldn’t-get-enough, sex. Or maybe it was me who couldn’t get enough, and he was the one grieving for something he’d never have again. Her. That part didn’t matter to me. It was life. But…I did miss how close we used to be. Dammit, I had to get him to talk to me again. I had to fix this.