Chapter 11

11

A manda

“I’m going to send you these pictures, and I want you to tell me if there’s any man on here you like.”

My eyes rolled as I listened to Mama speak. I didn’t know why I continued to talk to her about what was going on between Elias and me when she always said something that made me mad or sad. A part of me hoped one day she’d say something that actually helped me. Well, that helped my heart. Her advice helped me make money and keep my guards up, but it never helped me feel soft and safe in my femininity when it came to men.

“Ma, that’s really not necessary.”

The low chuckle she released told me just how little she believed me. “It is. It’s clear you’re not going to get off that man’s peen until you have another one to hop on.”

“Ma!” I grabbed my throat and tried to keep from laughing.

“You know I’m telling the truth!” I didn’t bother arguing with her crazy ass, so she continued. “That man told you you’re his even if you ain’t his. Now I know y’all young people like that crazy stuff, but you deserve better than that, Amanda. You deserve better than a man simply wanting to possess you. That’s all this is. He doesn’t want you. Even if he loves you. He will never be with you. He just wants to possess you and make sure no one else has you.”

My phone buzzed, indicating a new text message. It was Elias letting me know he was outside. I heard the garage let up seconds later as I texted back and told him to let himself in. I’d returned my mama’s call while I waited for EJ to finish the last of his homework. My two deliveries from Elias had been delivered, and I was in a great mood until she and I talked.

“Alright, Ma. I have to go. Elias is here, and we’re about to watch a couple of movies with EJ.”

She sighed. “When will you learn?”

“Bye, Ma. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Alright. Look at that picture! All three of them are single. Let me know which one you want.”

I laughed. “You’re talking about these men like they’re a piece of meat.”

“The only piece of meat you need to be worried about is the one betwe—”

“Wassup?”

I hung up in Mama’s face and jumped at the sound of Elias’s voice. “Hi.” I cleared my throat as he eyed me skeptically before chuckling.

“Who you in here talking to that’s got you so jumpy?”

Pulling my hair behind my ears, I smiled. “That was Mama. She told me you being possessive of me is not a good thing, so she sent me a picture of some single men to choose from.”

“Hmm.” He loosened his tie, giving me the chance to take in how good he looked in his cream and white. “I don’t think I’m possessive of you. I think I am territorial, but that’s not a bad thing.”

“Yeah?” I asked, heading over to the refrigerator to grab the wine and some ginger ale for EJ. His grandparents had him drinking that shit like it was water. “How is being territorial not a bad thing?”

To my surprise, he wrapped his arms around me by the counter. After I set the drink and wine down, he turned me to face him. I held my breath unintentionally as he spoke.

“With me being territorial over you, it gives you priority in my life because you belong to me. I protect you. I take care of you. I value you. I look after you. I invest in you. I provide for you when you let me. What’s wrong with that?”

Before I could respond, EJ came into the kitchen. His eyes lit up at the sight of Elias, and I was glad I kept him joining us a secret. We grabbed our snacks and headed into the living room, where we watched two movies that fought to keep my attention. I kept thinking back on Elias’s words. If I allowed him to, I knew there would be so much more that he’d do for me. That meant a lot to me, regardless of how Mama downplayed it.

To test my theory, I sent him a picture of the Hermes couch I’d been looking at. It was damn near a hundred thousand dollars, and even though I could afford it, I’d been dragging my feet—or should I say wallet. I wanted the armchairs that matched too. After he looked at the picture, he looked over at me across EJ’s head.

“That shit is fly as hell. I love that color.”

“I know, right? It’s a tad darker than peanut butter and would look so good with the paintings in here that your brother did.”

“You want it?” he asked, looking back down at his phone.

“I think so.”

“What else? Does it come like a set?”

My cheeks lifted as I smiled. “Not technically but it does have matching chairs and some lamps and benches and stuff that goes with it.”

“How much you need?”

“Oh. No. I—”

His tongue rolled over his teeth as he looked over at me. “Half a mil? Is that enough?”

Blinking rapidly, I swallowed hard and nodded softly. “That’s probably too much.”

“I’ll wire you that in the morning and you can use it to get whatever you want.”

My shoulders slumped as my eyes watered. It wasn’t the money he was so willing to spend on me. It was the care and the fact that he would always go above and beyond for me. Elias wasn’t just talking shit when he said he took care of and provided for me. That had to count for something, right?

“Thank you, Elias.”

He laughed and I joined in when EJ shooshed us. “Are you actually letting me buy you something?” he asked quietly in disbelief.

“Yes, but you better hope I don’t change my mind in the morning.”

We mirrored each other’s smiles for a few seconds before returning our attention back to the TV. Once the last movie ended, he went and played a couple of games with EJ, while I talked shit in the background as if I knew what the hell they were doing. After that, EJ showered and got ready for bed, and I prepared to walk Elias out.

At the door, neither of us was in a rush for him to leave. Licking my lips, I looked at his. I’d been wanting to kiss him for weeks now. Things had been so up and down between us lately, but at that moment, I was open and yearning for the oneness and fullness I only felt with him.

“If you keep looking at my lips like that…” His words trailed off as he closed the distance between us.

“Like what?” I asked as my eyes bounced from his eyes to his lips.

“Like you want them on you.”

“I do.”

“When have I ever denied you?”

I wanted to remind him of how he denied me when I told him I didn’t want to have another baby, but I decided against it. My smile turned into a squeal when he picked me up and carried me over to the couch. As soon as he sat down, we began to remove each other’s clothing. Our bodies were so in sync with each other. My pussy was already wet, and he was already hard. There was no need for foreplay. Not tonight, at least.

The moment he squeezed my ass and sucked my nipple into his mouth, my body weakened against him. I reached between us and slid his head between my folds before sliding down on him. He released a moan that went straight to my pussy and made it throb.

“My drug,” he muttered against my neck before licking it and smacking my ass.

“Mm…Slide down and let me get you high.”

Elias lowered himself further on the couch, allowing me to ride him at an angle. Before I could reach a medium pace, he gripped my waist and slowed me down.

“Slow down, bae. I want you to feel every inch of this dick.”

A quiet curse escaped me as my left hand palmed the wall behind his head. Between him licking and sucking various parts of my body and fingering my asshole, I was cumming quicker than I ever had before. Each slow swirl of my hips made him moan, grunt, or groan.

I wrapped my hand around his neck. I’d never said it before, but I was addicted to him too. So addicted I couldn’t stop myself from kissing him. As much as I wanted to slide my tongue inside his mouth, I didn’t. I wanted to give him time to push me away, but he didn’t. Instead, his right arm wrapped around my neck and pulled me back down to his lips. Elias slipped his tongue inside my mouth while his left arm wrapped around my waist and hugged me close. Held me close. Close like he never wanted to let me go.

It was the most intimate embrace.

I came again, and this time he did too.

It had been a while since I’d felt his seeds inside of me…and a part of me hated I was on birth control because I wanted them to bloom. I knew that feeling would wear off when the sun came up though.

“Tell me again,” he commanded breathlessly before smacking my ass.

Completely sober, I knew instantly what he wanted to hear. What I wished I could show him…give him…for the rest of our lives.

“I love you, Elias.”

A small smile lifted his lips before he kissed mine. “I love you too.”

Still connected, Elias carried me to my bedroom, where he gave me the drugging strokes that had me hooked on his ass literally since the day we met.

The Next Morning

Me and my bright ideas. I just had to be cute and wake Elias up, so I decided to cut his phone alarm off. Imagine my surprise when I saw several text messages from some bitch named Fiona. I couldn’t help but open the text thread and damn near gagged at the sight of her in several dresses. She sent them with a caption about letting him choose which she’d wear for their date and that she couldn’t wait to see him at work today.

Ol’ girl was pretty as fuck, and she was the complete opposite of me. Short, skinny, bright hair, lighter skin—the literal opposite of me. A pang shot through my heart instantly. I knew she was the woman that was going to take him from me. It made sense for him to fall in love with the opposite of me. Everything that was wrong about me, he’d find right in her. Instead of replying like I wanted to, I marked the text messages as unread and turned the alarm off.

The sweet greeting was replaced with me shoving his ass until he woke up, then I went to wake up our son. By the time I made it back to my room, Elias was up and in the shower. I finished my morning routine and tried not to let what I’d seen faze me. It was different seeing proof that he was dating versus us just talking about it.

“You want me to take EJ to school since I gotta head out anyway?” Elias offered.

“That’s cool. Thanks.”

He lowered himself as I sat at my vanity and kissed my neck, but I casually pushed him away. “You’d better head out. You don’t want to keep Fiona waiting.”

“Fiona?” My eyes rolled as I turned to face him. After I finished telling him about my plan and what I saw in his phone, he released a nervous chuckle and squeezed the back of his neck. “Look, Mandy…”

“I don’t need an explanation. I know you’re dating, and I’m about to start as well. It’s fine.”

He eyed me as if he was looking for something. Whatever it was, I hoped he found it so he could leave me the hell alone.

“We had a good day yesterday, bae. I really don’t want us to fuck this up.”

Sighing, I ran my fingers through my hair. “We won’t. It is a reminder that we need to just…keep things how they’ve been. No extra shit. No sleepovers, no kissing. No doing anything to make us closer than we already are.”

Elias nodded and released a hard breath. “I can agree to that, though I did miss those soft, juicy lips.”

That made me smile. “Go take my baby to school, E. And…good luck on your date this weekend. She’s super pretty, and she seems to like you and want to please you.”

“She’s cool. It’s too early to say either way, but we’ll see.” He chuckled and hung his head. “It feels weird talking to you about this now.”

“It hasn’t before. I want us to get along like we used to. Seriously.”

His eyes returned to mine. “I can read you easily but sometimes…” His head shook as he took a step back.

“Sometimes what?”

“It doesn’t matter.” He gave me a kiss on the forehead, as usual. “I guess I’ll see you for family day.”

With a nod, I stood to say goodbye to my baby. “See you then.”