Chapter Nine

"How was the evening with your possessive friend?" Tommy asks me.

We're sitting in the cafeteria together at one of the four-person booths, waiting on Bethany and Louis to return with lunch. I took a few days' rest and my leg feels much better in the prosthetic, and the replacement is meant to arrive by courier any day now.

"It was fine," I say.

Tommy looks amused. "You didn't curse at him? Not even once? Or tell him ‘fuck a horse, you posh shit?'"

I redden, cringing hard at the memory. I said that to Mark once. We'd been playing basketball. I'd blocked him from behind and ended up in a full-contact manoeuvre with him. I'd gotten so overwhelmed I straight up shoved him on the ground and cursed at him. Mark had turned to me, bewildered, and the entire court had descended into madness as players picked sides and a huge fight broke out.

I glare at Tommy, who looks incredibly amused. "I didn't—" I hesitate. I did curse at him, actually.

Tommy snickers, "Knew it. A zebra can't change its stripes."

"Well, I," I begin, floundering for a defence. Tommy sips his water. "I also told him to come on my stomach."

Tommy chokes.

I pat his back as he tries to breathe. He's teary-eyed and red-faced when he stops coughing. "Now that I wasn't expecting. How did that come about, exactly?"

I've spent a lot of time thinking about it. In fact, I thought of little else all weekend and tired myself out entirely. I was happy for it. I've gone from not being able to orgasm for months, to managing it several times in one weekend. It's not something I'll ever be able to discuss with a doctor or a shrink, but I'm pretty sure it's a positive sign for my recovery.

"I guess I wasn't as shy once the pills kicked in."

"That makes—" Tommy's eyes narrow. "Wait. You two didn't hook up while you were high, did you?" There's an edge in his voice. "Because if Mark—"

"We didn't," I say.

"And he better not have—"

"He didn't."

"Just because you like him doesn't mean it's okay for him to—"

"Nothing happened, Tommy," I repeat, making him meet my eyes to interrupt his tangent.

"Okay." Tommy relaxes. "So what happened? How did he respond?"

"He said nothing's going to happen, so stop with the…" I trail off, sinking in my seat as my face warms.

"Go on," Tommy encourages. There's a glint in his eye; he's enjoying this. "It's just me. You don't need to be shy."

"…the verbal porn."

Tommy coughs, poorly disguising his laugh.

"He was really nice about it after, too," I add. I'm sure my face is bright red. "And…do you think, well, I don't know for sure, but I got the impression that maybe he's interested in me, too?"

Tommy looks amused by my suggestion.

I lick my lips, unsure. "Am I way off-base? I mean, I have been a dick to him for two whole years…"

"Do I think the guy who basically told me to fuck off so he could be alone with you, could possibly be interested in you?" Tommy asks, rephrasing the question. "The potential is there, Kyle. And another way of looking at your two years of being a dick to him, is that he has put up with you being a dick to him for two whole years and keeps coming back for more."

I mull that over. "At the very least I know he can like guys," I say.

"We knew that already."

"We did?" I glance at Tommy.

"Ah." Tommy winces, and from the way he glances at me and away, I can tell that was a slip of the tongue.

"Tell me," I demand.

"He uh…Louis and Mark have hooked up before."

I stare at Tommy, uncomprehending. Then I peer across the cafeteria to where Louis and Bethany are waiting for their food at the end of the counter. "Louis?"

"Yeah."

"And Mark?"

"Yeah."

I glance back at Tommy. "When was this?"

"It was a good while back." Tommy shrugs, and I can tell from his expression that he's uncomfortable. "Sorry, Kyle. I didn't mean to hide it. I worried that you'd be upset if you found out, and Louis had only just joined our friend group at the time, too."

"I wouldn't have treated him badly about that," I say with a frown.

"The same way you wouldn't push your crush on the ground and tell him to fuck a horse?"

" Stop bringing up that story; it's one of the worst ones."

"Oh, I have several more stories far worse than—"

"Lalala, shut up," I mutter. I glance across the hall once more to Louis's slim figure. He's always been bright and buoyant, and I've always really enjoyed talking to him, but there was something about his extroverted manner that also put me on edge. If Louis wanted to gossip, people would stop and listen, and that has always scared me a bit. "So he's safe?" I murmur to myself.

Tommy's head cocks to the side, his teasing grin slipping into a frown. "What do you mean?"

"Ah, no. Nothing. Nothing."

"Kyle—"

"I didn't mean anything."

"Okay. I got it. But, if anyone ever gives you a hard time, you have me, alright?" Tommy says seriously. "And Louis will have your back in a hot second, too."

I rub the back of my neck, heat prickling over my skin. "I got it," I say. And Tommy is merciful; he doesn't try to dig for more. I let out a long breath.

"So long as you know." Tommy shrugs, casually. "Do you remember during basketball when you went up to Mark and—"

"I'm going to ask him out," I say, before Tommy can bring up more terrible, terrible memories. Honestly, it's a miracle that Mark even looks at me after everything over the last few years. If someone told me the person driving that car had been Mark, getting revenge, I wouldn't be surprised. "Or I was thinking about it. Now that you've reminded me how awful I've been to him, I don't think it's a good idea anymore."

"Go for it," Tommy says without hesitation. "Even if he turns you down, it's worth it to put yourself out there. You'll wonder about it forever if you never ask, and years down the line, you'll regret holding back. I never asked my kindergarten crush out, and to this day I wonder if I would have been married had I done it." Tommy finishes with an encouraging smile.

Across the hall, Louis picks up his tray. The idea of him and Mark hooking up just doesn't fit. "Who came on to who?" I ask, unable to help myself. "Mark?"

"I didn't ask."

"I bet it was Mark. He's so bossy, and he's—"

I catch Tommy's don't make me discuss Mark's sex life look and shut my mouth. I return to the conversation. "You don't think I'm misreading it? I'm scared I'm seeing interest when really it's just pity. Nobody's a dick to the person who lost a leg."

I don't get to hear Tommy's answer. Louis and Bethany return together with trays packed for lunch. I'm staring hard at Louis, analysing his face as he sits down. He catches me looking and smiles. "I'm glad we're allowed to talk again," he says happily. "I was so bored in accounting without you. Were the audio files I sent you okay for the lectures? I sat up front to be closer to the professor."

"They were great, Louis. Thanks."

Bethany catches my eye next and smiles. "Glad I'm not having to draw straws to pick who I can invite to my parties on the weekend now."

"I still don't understand why you were fighting," Louis says honestly. He looks between me and Tommy, waiting for one of us to answer.

"Because I'm a dick," Tommy replies, scowling.

I turn to him, surprised at the upset note in his voice. He doesn't meet my eyes, and Bethany casts him a long, appraising look.

"O—kay." Louis blinks.

Someone steps up to the table, looming over us. I glance up and meet Eddie's eyes as he stares right at me. From his expression, I worry he's about to throw a punch. I haven't even done anything to deserve one. I think. Not recently, anyway.

He just stares at me.

"What?" I ask. My voice comes out as if I am about to hit him .

Eddie grimaces before he sighs, looking at me like I'm disgusting. "There's a house party at my place next weekend. You're invited." Absurdly, he's addressing me as he says it.

"Are you trying to lure me somewhere to murder me?" It's the first, and only, thing that comes to mind.

Eddie sighs again like his world is ending. "It's Mark's birthday."

Technically, Eddie's implication makes sense. Practically, I struggle with my interpretation. "You're inviting me?" Again, I'm mean about how I answer. As if I'd rather die than attend.

Eddie roughs up his hair with a scowl. "Yes! I'm inviting you, dickhead. You better turn up." He storms off, leaving me to stare after him in confusion. As Mark's closest friend, Eddie has seen first-hand my bad language and stupidity, and he hasn't taken kindly to it. Who would?

"Why would he invite you?" Louis asks, confused. "He knows you and Mark don't get along."

"Right," I say.

"If everyone would stop acting stupid for five minutes, all of you would be best friends," Bethany puts in. She continues eating her lunch, clearly not suspecting the invite is in any way malicious.

Tommy doesn't look worried either. I would guess he's thoughtful, based on his expression. He looks at me contemplatively. I don't get an answer out of him until we're walking to class.

"Eddie is Mark's closest friend, right? And he doesn't like you," Tommy says. "So if he's inviting you, then he must think that Mark wants you to be there. However , if it's Mark's birthday party, there will be a lot of guys there that don't like you."

That's probably true, but…I gnaw at my bottom lip. "I could go?"

"If you're going, I'm going."

"I don't need a babysitter."

"Uh-huh. And what about when you pick a fight with Mark, and his friends take it personally?"

"I won't pick a fight. We've had actual conversations, now."

"You were picking a fight with Eddie two seconds ago."

I hesitate. I've gotten much better around Mark. But Eddie is still…but…I want to go. Especially if I'm going to ask Mark out. Going to his birthday party seems like a good lead-in to that. If I can have a civil night with Mark and his friends, then I can try asking him out for…drinks? Dinner? A date of some description.

I've not been on a date ever, so I'll have to give it some thought.

My mind zings back to Eddie. "You can go?" I double check.

Tommy gives me a long look before nodding.