Chapter 6

chapter

six

Damien

I head outside to sit on the patio and stare up at the inky night. The cabin is far enough out of town that the sky is peppered with twinkling stars.

I lean back in the Adirondack chair and squeeze my eyes shut. That had not gone as planned. More than likely all the buzzes were more texts from my sister. She likes to boss me around.

AURELIA: I'm going to need all the details immediately.

AURELIA: I'm serious, Damien, don't fuck with me.

AURELIA: What's happening? Dammit, why isn't this show live?

ME: Thank God it's not live. I don't need you spying that closely on my life.

AURELIA: How did it go?

ME: It could have gone better.

AURELIA: Couillion. What did you do?

ME: Why do you automatically assume it was me?

AURELIA: Now I know it was you. Spill or I'm going to video call you.

ME: She wasn't what I was expecting. In fact, she was kind of bitchy.

AURELIA: Are you kidding with me right now?

ME: No. Let's just say we didn't really click, and we'll leave it at that.

AURELIA: No, we will not!

AURELIA: Let me guess, she didn't take all her clothes off and drop to her knees begging to service you?

ME: Gross. Don't talk like that to me.

AURELIA: You're so sensitive. You know older sisters have sex too.

ME: No, I do not know that, nor do I want to know that.

AURELIA: You have nephews.

ME: Immaculate conception. I'm a good Catholic boy.

AURELIA: laughing with tears gif

AURELIA: You know it is not okay to call a woman a bitch just because she's not into you.

AURELIA: I thought I raised you better than that.

ME: You are my sister. You didn't raise me.

ME: And yes. As soon as I typed it, I realized it was a total dick move.

ME: You know I don't generally think that about women. I haven't said it to anyone but you and I won't.

AURELIA: Good. Don't make me come down there and kick your ass.

ME: Trust me, I'm kicking my own ass. I liked this woman from the moment I saw her, and she's clearly not interested in me.

ME: Worse than that, she finds my videos repulsive.

ME: Just got under my skin, I guess. And then I acted like a total dick.

AURELIA: You might have to break this down for me. I want to be on your side, but I need to know exactly what you did wrong when you say you acted like a total dick.

ME: I just came on too strong.

AURELIA: You didn't touch her, did you?

ME: God. No. Of course not.

AURELIA: Good. Remember consent is sexy.

ME: For fuck's sake, Aurelia.

AURELIA: I still need more details.

ME: I was just suggestive and flirty.

AURELIA: OMG tell me you didn't!

AURELIA: You did, didn't you?

AURELIA: You became Mr. Smexy Pants, didn't you?

ME: I hate that you know me this well.

AURELIA: laughing gif

AURELIA: another laughing gif

ME: Sure, laugh it up, Chuckles.

AURELIA: yet another laughing gif

ME: Yeah, I get it. You're amused. But could you take a moment to be helpful?

ME: How do I fix this?

AURELIA: You know exactly how to fix this.

ME: I really don't.

AURELIA: You start by apologizing. Sincerely. No Mr. Smexy pants involved.

AURELIA: And then you grovel.

ME: That's it? I apologize and ta-da, I'm forgiven?

AURELIA: No. There are no guarantees.

ME: Obviously.

AURELIA: But you have to apologize if you've been an ass. And, yes, there is a chance she'll forgive you.

AURELIA: Because honestly, it's really not that hard. Women want men who can admit when they're wrong.

ME: I can do that.

AURELIA: Fuck yeah you can. Now GEAUX get her, Tiger.

ME: Please don't.