Chapter 14

fourteen

E DITH HAD MADE a few mistakes—many mistakes—and it was time to pay for them, both materially and spiritually. She wanted to reimburse Perry for buying the Star Maiden, no matter what he said, and she wouldn’t allow Marianne to buy the painting. Also, she ought to apologise to Perry again and have a private conversation with him.

But first, she needed a word with Valentine. So even though she wanted nothing more than to see Perry again and lay all her lies out, she went to Bloomsbury.

Loud voices and laughter came from the other side of the door to Valentine’s flat. She knocked hard to be heard over the noise.

Valentine himself opened the door. “Dear Edith. What a pleasure. Please do come in.” He held the door open for her, shouting over his shoulder, “Beautiful Astrea is here.”

The cheek of him.

Daphne, Neville, and other people Edith didn’t know crammed into the sitting room. An empty bottle of wine lay in a corner, along with discarded jackets, ties, and ladies’ capelets. Plates with half-eaten sandwiches were scattered around. She twitched her nose at the smell of tobacco.

“Edith.” Daphne rushed to hug her. “So you changed your mind and came here.”

She removed Daphne’s arms from herself. “I’m not here to stay.”

Neville raked a long gaze over her, but it didn’t seem to show appreciation.

“Everyone.” Valentine filled a glass of wine and raised it. “Please, join me in a toast for Edith’s beauty and the outrageous amount of money I made.”

“Valentine, I need to talk to you.” Before he could answer, she grabbed his arm and dragged him to the next room.

“What is it, my dear?” He polished off his glass with one tilt of his head. “Listen, if it’s about the swimming pool, I’m sorry. I had no idea you hated swimming pools. Daphne said you’d be fine.”

“You promised me you wouldn’t sell my painting.” Anger rose to the fore. She shook with it. “I demand you give me the money you made out of it.” So she could pay Perry and take the darn painting, even though he didn’t want her money.

Valentine turned serious. “Oh, that. I’m sorry, but I thought you knew. Daphne was supposed to tell you before the sale.”

She let out an unladylike curse. “No, Daphne didn’t tell me anything.”

“I had a huge debt I needed to settle rather urgently. If I hadn’t, I’d be in serious trouble.”

“You broke our deal.”

He ran a hand through his hair. “Try to understand. There were people who would have hurt me if I hadn’t paid. I owed a large sum to Daphne’s father, and he isn’t a man you want to upset. Selling the goddesses was Daphne’s idea actually.”

Edith hitched a breath.

Valentine glanced at the door. “I told her the goddesses’ series wasn’t for sale, and it wasn’t complete, anyway. I needed one more model for Astrea. Professional models aren’t easy to find, and they’re expensive. Daphne said she would find a model.”

“She convinced me to pose, and I was cheap and foolish. You knew you were going to sell the Star Maiden before you started painting it, but you lied on my face. And you never wanted to paint me specifically. You merely needed a sacrificial lamb.”

“Oh, no.” He put a hand on her shoulder. “When I saw you, I understood immediately you would be perfect. If I hadn’t liked you, I wouldn’t have painted you.”

“Wonderful. Really. I feel so much better now.”

“I’m sorry for the deceit, but Daphne is like her father. You don’t want to go against her.”

She rubbed the aching spot between her eyebrows. “So you don’t have any money now, I gather.”

“Thirty pounds.”

“Good gracious.”

“I needed the whole set of goddesses before selling the paintings because all the goddesses together make an impression, and that raises the price, and I was right. Those paintings were a success. Your painting made hundreds of pounds. Will you pose for me again?”

The question shocked her. “Absolutely no. Never.”

“I hope you’ll change your mind.”

She didn’t need to hear more. She tried to leave the room, but Daphne and Neville blocked her path.

“What’s the matter?” Daphne asked.

“Edith is upset because I sold her painting,” Valentine said.

“I tried to warn you,” Daphne said. “But you didn’t let me talk.”

A sudden fatigue caught Edith off guard. “You lied to me. You and Valentine meant to sell my painting from the beginning.”

“Don’t be sad, Edith.” Neville caressed her cheek, and she recoiled away from him. “Sadness doesn’t suit you. I would’ve bought your painting hadn’t I woken up late the day of the exhibition. It’s so difficult to be up and about before eleven.”

“You’re famous now. Aren’t you happy?” Daphne asked.

“Ask me that again after I’ve slapped you.” Edith sidestepped Daphne, but Neville coiled an arm around her waist and stopped her again.

“Not so fast, Star Maiden.” He inched closer to her ear. “Who’s the lucky bastard who has your nude painting? And don’t think I forgot about our deal.”

She removed his arm from her waist. “What deal?”

Daphne gave her a pointed look. “What do you mean? The dare we all agreed upon at the Scarlet Room.”

“I didn’t agree to do anything.” Although she’d been in her cups, and she didn’t remember everything about that night.

Valentine raised his eyebrows. “Yes, you did. We heard it and saw it.”

“Whatever this matter is, I have a more urgent one.” She tried again to leave the room, but Neville blocked her.

“Not yet. We need to talk.” He held the door open. “I need a word with Edith. Alone.”

“I’m in a hurry,” she said.

“It won’t take long.”

The others filed out in silence. When he shut the door, the chatter from the sitting room died. “It’s Perry, isn’t it?”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

He leant against the door, effectively trapping her. “He has your painting, doesn’t he?”

She folded her arms over her chest, waiting for the moment he moved away from the door.

“Perry isn’t the good man you think he is. He’s a spoiled, entitled brat.”

She scoffed, outraged.

“When he was younger, it didn’t matter what atrocious act he did, his parents always forgave him. They found his irreverent manners charming, his lack of respect for others a sign of strength. They scolded him, yes, but never too seriously because he was precious Perry.”

“Let me go.” She didn’t understand what this family’s story had to do with her.

He didn’t let her reach the handle, taking her wrist. “Albert did everything by the book. The golden boy of the family. He never broke a rule. I used to be like him until he defended Perry when he charmed my intended, and she broke the engagement with me. He did it to spite me, to prove he could charm any woman. I’m so charming, every woman does what I say , he told me.”

Those were exactly the same words Perry had used years ago to describe himself. Perhaps he’d been wild when he was younger, but he would never be cruel.

She wriggled her arm free; getting free from Neville’s hands was becoming a habit. “I don’t care about your quarrel with Perry. It’s a matter between you two.”

“He’s doing it again. Now he’s turning you against me.”

“That’s nonsense.” She hadn’t liked Neville well before Perry had returned.

“It’s not if you think you can refuse to give me what’s mine. I won the card game. We had a bet. You owe me a tumble.” A hard glint shone in his eyes.

She shook her head. “I didn’t agree?—”

He took her by the shoulders, none too gently. “Not at first, but after the champagne, you did.”

It could be. Her memories of that night were confused. She took advantage of the fact that he’d moved from the door to make a dash for it. She slipped out of his grip and flung the door open. Breathing hard, she crossed the room towards the front door.

“Edith!” Daphne started to follow her. “What happened?”

She strode out of the flat and rushed down the stairs. Her pulse spiked. The bet was nonsense. Did he really expect her to have a tumble with him only because she’d lost a stupid card game while she’d been drunk? Well, good luck with that. She had more pressing matters to deal with.

She sped up along the pavement, fuelled by her frustration, to catch an omnibus to Belgravia. By the time it drove close to Belgrave Square, her breathing was normal again.

She didn’t have the money to pay back Perry. Knowing him, he wouldn’t want a penny, but that wasn’t the point. Paying for the painting was the first step towards owning back her life.

A bitter taste pitched up her throat as she climbed the short flight of stairs to his glossy black front door. A hint of fear, worry, and shame jumbled up together. But it was a necessary combination of feelings.

She rang the bell and waited, changing her mind a dozen times. Perhaps she should wear something else before talking to Perry, or write down what she meant to say, or she should stop being a coward.

“Madam?” The butler jolted her.

“Good afternoon. I wish to see His Lordship if he’s receiving visitors.”

The butler held the door for her, but his puzzled expression held disapproval. That was the second time that Edith had come unannounced to see Perry.

“Please wait here.” The butler left her in the entry hall. Bad sign? Perry might order him to kick her out.

She remained still, watching the comings and goings of the maids and footmen as they worked through the house.

“Where’s my stethoscope?” Dr. York said to no one in particular, coming out of a room. “I can’t find anything in this—ah!” He skidded to a stop upon seeing her, his glasses askew on his nose.

“Dr. York.” She gave him a quick nod. “Afternoon.”

He straightened his glasses, removed them, and put them back on again. “Miss Star… I mean Winkworth. I shall…” He flushed.

Oh, goodness. Edith sighed. He must have seen the Star Maiden.

“See, I’m searching for my telescope. No, what am I saying? I’m not an astronomer, but I was thinking about the… silly me. Ha-ha. Look at the time! Well, it was nice chatting with you.” He bowed and turned around in a hurry, only to hit the wall face first with a loud smack. A small painting hanging on the wall shook from the impact.

Edith cringed in sympathy as a phantom pain hurt her nose. “Are you all right, sir?”

“Yes, yes. Good day.” Without looking at her, he disappeared into a room.

Poor man. The Star Maiden must have shocked him.

She craned her neck to see if he came out again, but Perry thudding down the stairs distracted her.

“Edith.” He too came to an abrupt halt at the bottom of the stairs.

His sapphire eyes filled with surprise intimidated her; they lacked the usual sparkle.

“I’m sorry to trouble you, but I wondered if we could talk,” she said when he didn’t speak.

“Of course.” He went to the parlour on the ground floor. “I was thinking about you.”

Yes, she could easily believe that.

“Tea?” He put a hand on the knob. “I’ll ask Mason to bring a repast.”

“No, thank you.” A cold sensation set on the bottom of her stomach. “I…”

“Please take a seat.”

She did as told gladly because her legs quivered. “I’m really sorry to have lied to you.” She had to let those words out as soon as possible.

He sat in front of her, staring at her intently. “I’m sorry, too. I thought we were good friends and that you knew you could tell me anything.”

Oh, that hurt. But she understood him. “I didn’t want to disappoint you, but I realise I disappointed you more by lying. It’s that once I started lying, I couldn’t stop. It became an escape of sorts if it makes sense.”

“So what did you do in the past years?”

There was no reproach in his voice, only sadness, which pained her more.

“At first, I tried to get back to studying, but it didn’t have the same meaning. I wondered what kind of experiences I had missed while I was reading and studying. If I’d died that day in the Thames, my whole life would have been about studying and nothing else. The answer scared me because aside from my books, I didn’t have anything. No friends, no hobbies, no experiences. I thought of what you told me about enjoying life more. The near-death experience pushed me to try something new, and my life became worse from that moment on. I lost control of my life. It was so controlled before the incident, and it became the opposite afterwards. I didn’t want you to think of me as a silly, shallow girl.” She exhaled to take a breather. “I volunteer at St. Brigid Hospital in the dispensary, but aside from that, I don’t deal with medical science anymore.”

The whole speech sounded absurd to her own ears. Mostly, it sounded incredible that half a decade had passed between a party and a day in the dispensary.

She shivered when he gently took her hands and sat next to her on the sofa. For some silly reason, his concern for her sliced her chest open, and pain poured through the cracks.

A cold shiver slithered through her, leaving a trail of goosebumps over her skin. In the past years, she’d never cried. After the incident, she’d shed her share of tears.

But that day, sitting next to Perry and his compassion, the dam holding her tears back broke. A tear slid down her cheek. She bit down a sob because she didn’t want to fall to pieces.

“What about your parents?” he asked in a gentle tone.

“My father barely talks to me. He hates that I stopped studying. My mother tries to convince me to return to study or get married, but her disappointment is obvious. Marianne…I fear she might hate me.”

“No, your sister and your parents love you.” He rubbed her knuckles with his thumb. “You aren’t happy. That’s the problem.”

“No, I’m not. The parties and excesses give me a glimpse of happiness that lasts a second. Then I’m empty of emotions, as if I didn’t care about anything. A wraith until the whole circle starts again. And then there’s the darn painting.”

“Edith.” He touched her cheek gently. “What is it? What do you want?”

“I don’t know,” she whispered in a cracking voice. “I don’t know anymore. Even when I get something I want, satisfaction eludes me, and I start chasing a new thrill, an exciting new thing. It’s exhausting.”

“You know I won’t let anyone see the Star Maiden. Hell, I’ll destroy it if you want me to.” He drew soothing circles over the back of her hand.

“Too many times people have had to repair the damage I’ve caused. No, I want to pay for the painting.”

“There’s no need for that. I don’t want your money.”

“I want to do it. It’s only right. Somehow, some way, I’ll find the money to buy the painting from you.”

Perry reclined on the sofa. “I have a proposition. You’ll work for me for the next six months. After that period, you can consider me reimbursed for the purchase of the painting. No money required. Then we’ll discuss what you want to do with the Star Maiden.”

“Work for you? Doing what?”

He stared into her eyes as if he wanted to see her soul. “We’ll find something.”

“I’m not good at anything.”

“That’s not true, and your skills are the least of your problems. But I have to tell you, I love the Star Maiden.”

She tasted the saltiness of her desperation on her lips. “Do you really like the painting?” She had no idea why that comment intrigued her.

He looked surprised. “Of course I do. It’s exquisite. Mr. Carter has talent, and you’re stunning. I’d like to keep it, so it’s not for sale. But if you work for me, I’ll consider myself reimbursed.”

“All right.” She smiled, maybe for the first time in years. “I agree to work for you.”

“Fantastic.” He squeezed her hand. “You’ll start tomorrow morning. Nine o’clock. Don’t be late.”