Chapter 11

The past two weeks have been nerve-wracking. Dr. Randall said I couldn"t postpone the surgery any longer. It"s nothing too serious – that"s me trying to minimize it so the universe agrees with me – just a lot of endometrial tissue that needs to be removed. I was having heavy periods but no other symptoms.

I stayed in a hotel in Miami Beach for a few days, then when I was okay to fly, I went to my friend Julie"s in New York. I still feel a little discomfort even though the incision is minimal. I"m hoping to get back to feeling myself as soon as possible. That"s half the issue. The other is Max, of course. He became such a large part of my life in very little time.

There are a lot of things I miss. I miss spending time with him. I miss the cuddles, and even the surprise presents he always had for me. This man thinks he can"t love, but he treated me with deep affection—with care and consideration. He can love. I"m not going to start analyzing him. I"ve already done that countless times this past week – I"m not a psychiatrist.

Today, however, I"m feeling much better. I think in one more week I can begin looking for somewhere to live and start sending out my resume to find some work. I"d like to work from home this time. No more workplace romances for me.

I shower and change and go find Julie so we can have breakfast together.

When I find her, she looks a bit alarmed.

"Are you okay, Julie?"

"Anne, I"m so sorry. Keith went behind my back."

Then I hear voices. Then I hear the voice I"ve been desperately trying to forget. He"s here. Max is here in New York. My feet propel me forward towards the balcony where breakfast is served, and I find Max there talking with Keith, Julie"s fiancé. Max still looks like a god, and I fight the urge to get on my knees and worship him. As soon as he sees me, he gets up and approaches me.

"Anne, you look well. I was worried when they called from the doctor"s office."

"Why are you here, Max?"

"Can we go somewhere private to talk?"

I want to hear what he has to say, but I don"t want to bring him to my room. The temptation is too great with a bed nearby.

"Keith, can we use your office, please?"

"Sure, Anne. Take your time."

I wave to Julie so that she knows it"s okay, and I lead the way to the office. It"s big and fancy, just like everything Keith owns. Sitting down on the couch, I wait patiently until Max joins me.

"Anne, are you okay?" He starts right in, looking concerned. "I know it"s none of my business, but if you"re sick, we can get some specialists."

"Max, stop. I"m not sick, I don"t think so. I"m waiting for the pathologist"s report. I need to talk to Dr. Randall."

"You know you can count on me, don"t you, Anne?"

"That"s not how it works when you break up with someone."

He grabs my hand and kisses it.

"Anne, I"m sorry. I…these past weeks…nightmare." His face says it all. He"s been hurting. "I don"t think I can live without you, Anne."

"Why did you come to New York?"

"To apologize. To beg you to take me back. To bring you back to Miami with me."

"You realize that it would require a commitment for me to go back, don"t you?"

"I do. And I want to give that to you. I might need some help, though—maybe see a doctor."

That makes me take notice. If he"s willing to work on his issues, then we might have a chance after all.

"I hope you are serious about that, Max."

"I am. I"m not a coward. Though Erik says I am."

"I wouldn"t call you a coward. You went through something traumatic, and that is not easy to overcome. You came out on top, though." I hesitate. "Do you think…do you think you could love me?"

"Oh, kitten, I already do. It"s hard to accept, though, because I don"t want to be disloyal to Lauren. But you make me so happy and fill my life with love and joy. How could I not love you? Also, I think she would want me to be happy."

I"m scared to accept this declaration. What if he takes it back once we"re home? He could change his mind and throw me out again like a piece of used paper. Am I ready to gamble with my future?

"I don"t know, Max. This change seems rather sudden after only two weeks."

"What do you feel for me, kitten? The truth. Unfiltered."

"You"re asking for a lot there, Mr. Lewis."

"That"s Growly Bear to you."

That earns a small smile from me. Dare I confess what"s in my heart? Didn"t I want to become a different, bolder person when I went to Miami? Where"s that girl that flirted like she was a femme fatale?

"I love you, Max. You made it way too easy for me to fall in love with you. The past couple of weeks have been unbearable. I wasn"t even trying to get you out of my heart. All I kept thinking about was how could I heal your heart enough for you to let me in."

Tears start falling from my eyes, and Max wipes them with his thumb.

"Kitten…"

"Don"t. Don"t look at me like that. Or we"ll end up having sex on Keith"s couch."

He smiles, and there"s a twinkle in his eye. He moves from the couch and surprises me by kneeling before me, holding a velvet box in his hand.

"Max…"

"You said you needed a commitment if you were to come back home with me. I was prepared for that. More than prepared, I"m ready for that. Which is why I asked my parents for my grandmother"s ring so I could ask you a very important question. Are you ready to hear it?"

Goosebumps cover my entire body at his words, and I"m a little tongue-tied.

"I am…ready, I mean."

"Anne, you came into my life like a whirlwind of joy and sunshine. Every day, your affection and care for me healed my heart a little bit until it was whole, and the only thing holding me back were my own limiting beliefs. Today, knowing that you love me as much as I do you, I have the strength to ask you. Will you marry me? Will you be my wife?"

"Max…"

"I know it"s fast. And I know just two weeks ago, I was saying I couldn"t be your future. But I realized I want this more than anything I"ve ever wanted in my life. Nothing matters if you"re not by my side, Anne. Please say yes."

I jump up from my seat and bring him up with me. He towers over me, and as I look up at him, I thank the universe for this man who has finally decided to open up to me and let me in. I put my arms around his neck and smile.

"Yes, Max, I will marry you."

He kisses me deeply—on the lips, without hesitation, just long, slow, adoring sweeps of his lips on mine. Then he takes the ring out of the box. Gently, he puts the ring on my finger, and I appreciate the simple band with a single solitaire. It"s beautiful, but the fact that it"s a family heirloom makes it priceless.

"I want to celebrate." He wiggles his brows.

I want to kiss you more.

"Not here!"

"You"re no fun."

"Let"s go to my room."

We sneak out of the office and go to my room. I"m not sure how thin the walls are but I hope they muffle some of our lovemaking. I can be loud. I let him inside and lock the door behind me. The room looks small with Max inside it. He"s always been larger than life to me. I stay stuck to the door and wait for him to take the lead.

He comes back to where I"m standing and gently starts to remove all of my clothes. Standing naked in front of him, I feel extremely vulnerable, but if I can"t be that way with the man I love, who can I be that with? Max undresses in front of me and as always, I"m amazed at his physique. I put my hand on his chest and trace the tattoos I find there. I love following the ink with my fingers, and the light touch makes him shiver.

I"m taking my normal path through his tattoos when I see a new one, a sunflower with my name on the stem.

"When did you get this?"

"Last week."

"You didn"t have to do that."

"I wanted to. I belong to you. I needed to have your mark on my body."

Tears threaten to come out of my eyes again, but I keep them at bay.

"Make love to me, Max."

"Your wish is my command, kitten."

For the next few hours, he makes love to me gently, telling me with each kiss and each caress how much he loves me. Those actions show me that he has truly opened his heart to me, and because of that, I belong to him now.