23. Valentina

Chapter 23

Valentina

I don’t talk to Ronan on the car ride back to his place. He tries drawing me out a few times, but I don’t give him an inch. The whole time, my head’s spinning as I try to make sense of what just happened, and I’m trying not to explode as the implications become clear.

But unfortunately, I make it barely into his house, before whirling on him. My cheeks are red, and I can feel my pulse in my neck. “You had no right.”

“Okay, okay, easy there,” he says, holding his hands up. He inches past me and goes into the kitchen.

“You had no right,” I snarl as I follow.

He pours two glasses of wine and offers me one. I ignore it, afraid that my hands will shake if I try to pick it up. He drinks from his, giving me a calm and easy look.

“I understand I sprung that on you?—”

“You dumped a fucking job in my lap. A job I didn’t ask for.”

“You’re right. I did.”

“And you’re not even trying to deny it.” I start pacing across the kitchen, too mad to stand still. “Do you have any idea what it feels like to be in business with Rocco again? I thought we were going to rip him off and use the meth to extort him, not freaking become partners in his goddamn business.”

“We are extorting him,” Ronan points out. “Only in a way you didn’t intend.”

“My goal was to make him bleed then to take everything from him. Instead, you want me to supervise the asshole, and you’re going to make him rich. That man wanted me dead . Do you understand that?”

He nods slowly. It’s absolutely infuriating, how calm he is. “That was then. It was in the aftermath of a bloody and ugly implosion of a powerful mafia family. He was wrong to want it, and I promise, if you want revenge on him, I’ll happily make sure he ends up dead at his desk one evening. But I want you to think about this first.” He takes a step toward me. I take a step back, shaking with anger, and bump into the refrigerator. I slip away before he can trap me, staying close to the counters. “Don’t you want your family back?”

I stare at him. My mouth opens and my eyes go wide. “How fucking dare you?” I say, feeling like he kicked me in the guts. Doesn’t he know that’s everything to me? Why would he dangle that in front of me, knowing damn well it won’t ever happen?

My father is dead. The Santoro Famiglia died with him. Everything was taken away from me, and some business deal with a former Capo won’t bring it back. I’ve been mourning that loss for a long time now, and the wounds are still horribly fresh and starting to fester.

“You can’t have the old family ever again,” he says, and his eyes look sad and his smile fades away. “I’m sorry about that, love. If I could give it to you, I would. But this job with Rocco, it could be the start of something new. You could build something?—”

“You should’ve asked me first.” I stare into his eyes. I can see where he’s going, but I don’t want to follow the logic. “You can’t just dump something like this on a person.”

“I hear you, and you’re right, we should have talked. But I knew you would’ve been too afraid. Valentina, you can rebuild the Santoro Famiglia, or at least you can make something new for yourself. You have the revenue streams, and you’ll have the start of the manpower once you win over Rocco and his people, and from there?—”

“Stop it,” I snap, shaking my head. “Just stop it, okay? Those men are never going to follow me. I don’t know if you noticed, but I have tits and a pussy, and guys like Rocco only respect another swinging dick.”

“There have been female crime lords in the past. There will be more in the future. And I’ll help you.”

“You’re insane. Your own family wants to usurp you, and you think you can help me build something new?”

His face flinches, and I realize I shouldn’t have said that. “I’m going to fix that. We’re working on it together.”

“I know,” I say, feeling bad, but I can’t lose sight of what’s happening. He thrust me into a position I never asked for, and now he’s bringing up all my old wounds. I don’t want this, and I never did. “I understand you think you were doing something good here, but it’s too much. It’s just too much.”

He grunts and nods. “I hear you. But you need to think about it before you decide.”

“I should’ve thought about it before you cut that deal.”

He comes toward me. This time, I stand my ground, lifting my chin. He touches me, and I feel like I might crumble. I want comfort right now—I want him—but he’s also the source of all this hurt and anger.

“This could be good for you, love. And if it’s not and you really despise it, you can walk away. Nobody will force you to stick around.”

“You might.”

He tilts my chin until we’re staring into each other’s eyes. “No, not ever. You’ll be here because you want to be, not because I’m holding something over your head.”

I take a slow, deep breath, and lick my lips.

I want him, and I’m so mad at him.

I hate this asshole, but I also understand that he’s trying to give me a gift bigger than I probably deserve, and bigger than he probably realizes.

There’s a hole in me—a deep, horrible hole, like someone scooped out my insides and left me a body without organs. He wants to give me a chance to heal, to grow, to have a new place like I’ve always craved.

The job with Rocco could be the start of that. Or it could be nothing. I won’t know unless I try.

“You should’ve asked me first,” I whisper.

“And miss this? I don’t know. I’m enjoying myself.”

I try to pull away, but he holds me tight and kisses me. I struggle, but there’s no real fight in me, not the moment his lips press against mine. It’s pathetic, I’m keenly aware of how weak I feel, but I can’t help myself.

I want this man. I hate him, and I hate him so badly it’s like a second pulse in my core.

His tongue slips between my lips. I bite him and he snarls, his eyes flaring. I smirk back as he pushes me into the counter. I gasp, the edge biting into my back, but he’s crushing my mouth with his and dominating me with his tongue. I moan into that kiss, into the bitter, delicious pleasure radiating through me, and the pure, animalistic lust echoing out from him in waves.

I’ve never been wanted like this before. Not with such a raw intensity. He grabs my hair with one hand and pulls hard enough to make it hurt, and I gasp in anger as he kisses my neck and yanks down the front of my pants.

“I think you need a reminder, love,” he growls as I put my hands on his chest. His heart’s racing under my palms. “Maybe you’ve forgotten what it feels like.”

“It’s hard to forget,” I say back, and his hand moves down into my panties. I moan, biting my lip. He’s being aggressive and forward, and I fucking like it. His palm cups my pussy, and for a moment, he stares into my eyes.

“Tell me you’re not wet. Go ahead, love, tell me you’re not dripping into my hands right fucking now. Tell me you’re not a messy fucking girl for me. Tell me you don’t want me to fuck you deep and filthy until you’re so lost in orgasm, you’re willing to give me anything I want. Go ahead and say it, I fucking dare you. Go ahead and lie to my face.”

My head’s dizzy as his fingers begin to curl, sliding through my pubic hair and down along my slit. I shiver, eyes closing, as he teases my clit nice and slow. “You want the truth?” I ask him.

He glides two fingers inside of me so slowly I could scream. It feels incredible, and I’m moaning like an idiot.

“Yeah, give me truth, love.”

“You are an arrogant, selfish asshole. You hide who you really are with humor and jokes. You pretend like you’re unserious, when we both know that’s a whole lot of bullshit. And you know the worst fucking part?”

“Tell me,” he says, lips next to my ear, fingers buried in my pussy.

“I want you to fuck me until I’m blushing.”

He drops to his knees just like that.

I grab the edge of the counter with both hands as he pulls my pants off and throws them aside and slowly pulls off my panties. He looks up at me, eyes filled with lust, so gorgeous I can barely contain myself.

“Tell me you want me to make you come,” he says, the bastard, still teasing. “Tell me you want me to lick your messy little pussy until it’s nice and clean.”

“Please,” I say, vibrating and already on the edge.

“That’s my good girl,” he says then he buries my pussy with his mouth.

I grab his hair with one hand, eyes rolling back as his tongue does dangerous and lovely things to my clit, then slides inside of my pussy, before he rolls it up and down again. My back arches and whimpers escape my lips, and fuck, I don’t think I can take much more of this. I’m so angry, and I want him so badly, and all these emotions hit me at the perfect time as he sucks and licks and laps me up until I finally explode.

He grips my ass and I come against his mouth. I’m shaking and whispering his name over and over, and he growls like he can’t get enough of licking me. I nearly collapse, but he scoops me up and lifts me onto the island, sitting me down with my legs spread. I lean back on my hands, mouth parted, tongue licking my lips.

I kiss him and pull his shirt off. His mouth tastes like my pussy, and I still can’t get enough. We kiss like that and he undresses, and when he’s naked, he pulls off my top. My nipples are so stiff they’re almost painful as he licks them, slowly stroking a tongue in circles around each breast.

I take his cock in both hands as our eyes lock, and there’s a moment, a brief second, when I know everything is going to change. There’s a line, and we’re inches from crossing it. His thick crown is so close to my aching, soaking wet pussy, and all I want in the world is to feel him deep inside of me.

But if we do that, if he fucks me, I don’t think I can keep pretending anymore.

Up until right now, I could tell myself we were just two people fooling around. We got each other off, but so what? He called me love but that’s just an Irish thing, right? I could pretend and pretend and lie to myself all day long, but I knew that if he fucked me, I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror without knowing the truth.

And I sure as hell won’t be able to stop.

“Condom,” he says, mouth finding mine.

“Birth control,” I answer, breathing hard when he pulls back.

He licks his lips. “You’re sure?”

“Ronan,” I plead, and he must know what I’m thinking. He has to feel it too. He leans forward, stroking up and down, his shaft teasing along my swollen clit and I moan, pulling him closer with one hand, my weight on the other. I kiss him hard, and he shifts his hips until his cock is pressed against me?—

Then he slips inside, and fuck, it’s heaven.

I moan, pulling him into the kiss tighter, as he slides deeper and deeper into me, going so fucking slow. It hurts, because he’s huge, and it feels good, because he’s huge , and I arch my back and shift my hips slowly, letting him go as far as he can, until he’s absolutely buried in me.

“Fuck, love,” he whispers, staring at me with that blank lost-in-pleasure look, and it’s absolutely mind-breakingly seductive. I’m ringing all over for him, and I don’t want this to end.

“I know,” I moan.

“You’re so tight and goddamn perfect.” He dips down, licking one of my nipples as he pulls back. I’m stretched around him, and I don’t know if I can take him much longer before I come again.

“Ronan, please. I need you to fuck me.”

“Say that again.” A slow stroke, in and out. “Tell me that you’re a filthy, messy girl, and you need my big cock.”

“I’m messy,” I say as he strokes in and out again. “I’m filthy.” Another stroke, faster. “I need your big cock, baby, please .”

Then he’s fucking me and I’m lost, I’m finished, he’s filling me deep and driving into me the way I really, really need. It’s incredible, getting fucked raw and hard like a dirty girl, and my brain’s totally fried at this point. He fills me, licks my nipples, kisses me, and I’m dangling over the edge, ready to drop at any moment.

“You’re going to come for me,” he says, demanding and needy. “And when you do, you’ll get on your knees and swallow every drop of my cum, like the dirty, filthy, messy fucking girl you are.”

“Yes, Ronan,” I moan, and he slams into me, leans forward, and bites my shoulder.

Fuck. Fuck . The trigger pulls and I am so incredibly done.

I come hard for him, body flushing red, mind going black as the explosions tear into my core and travel up into my brain. I have to lean back on my elbows because I can barely support myself, but he’s not done with me, he rips into me as my spine turns to jelly. I’m panting hard, sweat rolling down between my breasts, and he finally pulls out, leaving me empty and twitching with bliss.

“Now, love,” he commands, stroking himself.

I drop down to my knees, open my mouth, and suck his tip as he strokes his shaft. Two circles of my tongue and he’s coming too, filling my throat. I swallow him as he groans, the most animalistic and beautiful sound I’ve heard in a long time.

He’s breathing hard and I’m panting too as he pulls me to my feet and kisses me. We stay there, touching, gently and slowly, his hands moving down to my ass and up along my spine. Tingles rush along my skin.

“I’m still pissed at you,” I whisper, but there’s no bite in it.

“That’s all right. I can handle pissed.”

“Also, it’s not fair. You can’t just fuck me every time I’m mad.”

“I don’t know, that seems like a pretty good way to make everyone happy.”

“Arrogant asshole.” I close my eyes, leaning my face against his chest.

“Yeah, love, I know.” But there’s only humor in his voice.