Friday, July 15, 1994

Friday, July 15, 1994

8:05 p.m.

Ethan huddles in the tent alone, quaking with nerves after the most agonizing few hours of his young existence.

It began when he returned to the house after agreeing with the others not to tell anyone about Billy being caught at the Hawthorne Institute. His arrival startled his mother, who was still in the kitchen, staring at the wall. Ethan expected her to immediately ask him about the argument with Russ, Ashley, and Ragesh that she surely had witnessed from the kitchen window, but there was nothing. Nor did she mention how he'd seen her crying in the kitchen—an incident Ethan thought would definitely be acknowledged.

Instead, his mother simply stood and went about her day, cleaning the kitchen and prepping dinner. She did it all with an unspoken yet palpable sadness, her bad mood evident in every heavy footfall, every slam of a drawer. Even Barkley felt it, retreating to a corner of the living room and softly whining.

Ethan tried to escape it by going upstairs to his room while his father hauled his orange tent from the basement and set it up in the backyard. Ethan watched from his bedroom window, surprised by the reminder that he was supposed to camp out with Billy tonight. He'd forgotten all about it. He wondered if Billy had, too. That is, if Billy was even around. Ethan had had no contact from him since they were at the Hawthorne Institute, a fact that allowed all sorts of bad thoughts to march through his brain. That Billy was in trouble. Or still stuck in the gate of that horrible mausoleum. Maybe he was even dead. If so, it would be all Ethan's fault because he had left Billy instead of facing punishment together.

At dinner, Ethan barely ate, picking at his single slice of cheese pizza while staving off nausea.

"Aren't you hungry?" his mother asked, and not in a concerned way. It was annoyance Ethan heard in her voice, which made his stomach clench even tighter.

"Not really," he said, barely able to push out those two very simple words. Caught between the urge to confess everything and the fear of getting in trouble, he found it hard to speak at all.

"You're not sick, are you?" his father said, making it sound like an accusation.

"No."

"Because if you are, you should have told me and spared me from having to put up that stupid tent."

Now, as Ethan sits alone in said stupid tent, he realizes that would have been a perfect time to admit what happened. Because his parents will clearly know something is wrong when Billy fails to show up. And then Ethan, despite telling the others he'd remain silent, will have to admit what happened.

Maybe he should just do it now and get it over with.

Part of him wants to, if only to relieve some of the guilt he's feeling, while another part of him wants to because he knows it'll get Billy into trouble, too. If he isn't already. And Billy deserves it, Ethan thinks with a surprise flash of anger. Russ was right when he said it was all Billy's fault. None of this would have happened if he hadn't led them to the Hawthorne Institute.

Where he had gone yesterday.

Which he had failed to tell Ethan.

Because he was too busy buddying up with Russ.

Ethan starts trembling again, a by-product of all these clashing emotions. He feels sorry and guilty and scared and mad all at once. Humming through it all is a sense of wanting.

He wants to remain best friends with Billy, just as he wants Billy to be, well, different. When the Barringers first moved in next door, Ethan had been intrigued by Billy's eccentricities. It was refreshing to meet someone his age so utterly himself. Now Ethan worries what will happen if Billy remains quintessentially Billy.

Not that he'll ever find out. After today, he'll be shocked if Billy ever speaks to him again. Which is all the more reason to suck it up and tell his parents what happened.

Mind made up, Ethan starts to crawl out of the tent, only to be stopped when he notices something completely unexpected.

There, standing stock-still in the yard, is Billy.