CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

Big Daddy watched Jenay try her best to eat some soup. They were in the cafeteria at the hospital in Jericho, Maine, and the sunlight for a change was shining through the tall windows. They'd had lunch in that cafeteria many times before. It had become a family tradition given the many times Jenay had been hospitalized there. They thought they had it figured out when a smart young doctor, Doc Martin, realized the medicine the hospital was giving Jenay was making her sick. But that was only a part of the story. Now they were claiming it was Lupus.

"Or it's not Lupus," Big Daddy said to his wife. "I can't keep up with all these experts and all their different diagnosis."

"It's Lupus-like, they said. And extremely rare," Jenay corrected her husband. "That's why it's so hard to diagnose. But that's the consensus now."

Big Daddy shook his head. "Having to have a consensus to tell you what's wrong with you rather than an ironclad diagnosis is infuriating."

"I agree," Jenay said as she spoon-sipped a little more soup. Then she smiled. "It'll be a shame to not know what you died of."

Big Daddy hated when she made light of her situation. "That's not funny."

"It's funny to me," Jenay said, still grinning.

But then she considered her husband. He was a man who knew how to handle stress better than any human being she'd ever known. But he was so worried about her that he could hardly function. And that was worrying her.

Her smile left, and her look turned sincere. She felt horrible. She always felt horrible lately. But she had to project strength around him or he'd never leave her side. "Charles, you have to promise me something," she said to him.

"Don't start that again, Jenay."

"Promise me, when I'm gone, you'll find somebody to love."

"Stop that talk," Big Daddy said angrily. "Now I mean it!"

But Jenay knew she had to give him permission or he'd be alone for the rest of his life. That was the kind of man he was. When his first wife walked out on him and left him with four young sons to raise alone, he did a great job raising his children. But he neglected his own wants and needs. She didn't want that to happen again.

But she knew it would if he wasn't mindful. Because he also happened to be so handsome and so damn sexy, she thought, she was certain women would start circling him like vultures as soon as she hit the grave. But she also knew that Charles was a big time womanizer before he met her, and she didn't want him to get sucked back into that women for sex only kind of behavior. He needed a good woman he could love, and that the children could respect. "I know you don't want to hear it, Charles. I don't want to have to say it. But it has to be said. I want you to fall in love again. Promise me you won't dismiss it like you're doing now. Please, Charles, promise me."

But Big Daddy frowned. "Are you nuts? You think I'm worried about some other dame at a time like this? I'm worried about you, and nobody else. So cut that shit out, Jenay, I mean it!"

But a drained look came over Jenay's face. "I'm tired, Charlie."

Charles looked at her.

"I've been sick so long, I'm tired. I need you to let me go."

Big Daddy's heart sunk. And he placed her hands in his hands. "You'll get better, Jenay. Fuck them doctors. You'll get better just watch and see. You can't give up."

Jenay knew she wasn't giving up. She was being realistic. "You've got to let me go, Charlie."

Big Daddy knew his wife didn't have long on this earth. The doctors had already told him so. And not just one or two, but every doctor they consulted. Her disease was extremely rare, extremely uncurable, and extremely progressive. Extreme. That was their diagnosis.

"Please let me go, Charlie," Jenay pleaded with him again.

But tears welled up in Big Daddy's hard, green eyes. "I can't, " he blurted out so painfully that it broke Jenay's heart.

But she knew she had to soldier on. "Please, Charlie. You have to let me go in order to be able to be there for Bonita and Carly and Ashley and the boys. They're going to need you."

Then she smiled. I'm going to be absolutely fine. Don't you worry about me. I've accepted Jesus Christ as my personal savior. I know where I'm going. And I'm glad to go."

Big Daddy looked at her. "You're going to get out of this hospital and you're going home with me. That's where you're going."

"I'm going home," Jenay said, "but not with you. You're still needed here. To take care of our children. And the rest of the family that so much depend on your wisdom and strength. And Mick needs you," she added with a smile.

Even a smile escaped Big Daddy's mouth when she threw Mick in the mix. But he wasn't trying to hear the rest of it. Not right now.

"Let's get you back to your room," he said, "before those nurses claim I kidnapped you."

Jenay smiled at that too. It wasn't as fruitful a lunch as she had hoped it would be, but she was going to keep working on him.

But as soon as he helped her out of her chair and they were about to leave, Big Daddy's phone began ringing. He pulled it out and looked at the Caller ID. "Speaking of the devil," he said. "It's Mick."

"Probably about Bella," Jenay said.

"Hey Mick, what's up?" Big Daddy said as he answered the call. "Bella okay?"

"It's not about Bella," Mick said over the phone. "They attacked Ursula too."

Big Daddy frowned, but he didn't want Jenay to hear any bad news. "Okay."

"They did a number on her, Charles. They did her worse than they did Bella."

"Damn. Did you catch the guy?"

"We caught him, but we had to turn him over to the cops because we had to call 911 for Ursula. But you won't believe what that clown said."

"What did he say?"

"He said you're the one that hired him to attack Ursula."

Big Daddy could not believe it. " Me ?"

"That's what he said."

"Who the fuck is he?"

As Big Daddy got more details from Mick, Jenay noticed a figure from out of the corner of her eyes. When she looked, she saw that he was pulling out a gun and hurrying straight for Charles, who was distracted on his phone.

"Charlie," Jenay said in a voice that amplified her terror, and in a voice so low that he didn't hear her.

When she saw the man lift his gun and aimed it at her husband, she screamed out Charlie! and did the only thing she knew to do. She jumped on Big Daddy with every ounce of strength she still had and knocked him down into the booth seat, with her body falling on top of him. But the gunman was already firing. He fired shot after shot as innocent bystanders began screaming and running. Then the gunman ran out too.

But Big Daddy was in a state of shock. He had his arms around Jenay when he realized she had fallen on top of him, but he wasn't just feeling her. He felt what seemed like thick liquid. When he lifted up his hands from her back and saw that his palms were covered with her blood, his heart nearly stopped.

Rallying, he eased his big body from beneath her small body and that was when he saw the bullet holes in her back. "No, God, no," he said as he got down on his knees and held his wife's lifeless body.

"Jenay," he cried out. "Jenay, please don't go! Jenay, come back. Just come on back. Jenay, come back!"

He was begging her hysterically, and Mick's hysterical voice could be heard calling his brother's name over the cellphone. "Charles, what's happening? Charles, what's wrong? Charlie ?"

But they both knew what time it was.

It was time to say goodbye.