17. Ellery

Ellery

After breakfast a few days later we decided to split off. The girls had planned a spa day while the rest of us played billiards in the lounge downstairs. It was a tradition we’d had since we were in high school. Each time one of us was old enough, we’d be allowed to go. When I was young, I thought it was fun and exciting—especially since it was one of the only times we were able to see our father for more than five seconds.

However, I quickly learned it was about giving him time to corner us and give one or all of us some lecture about life. I did like the hard cider they kept in the cellar here, however, so that was always nice.

Separating Samuel and Rachel was like pulling teeth, neither wanting to leave the other, and while it didn’t feel like that with Juniper, it wasn’t exactly easy. We’d spent every day together for the past week and a half, and thinking about spending this one without her felt strange.

But she would have a good time with my mother and Rachel, at least. I still reserved opinions on Tiffany, though Juniper seemed to see a different side to her than I did.

When we got there, the table was set up just as it always was. I ran my finger over the deep wood on the outside. There was a slight run in the wool from my first time here, when I tried knocking the ball too quickly and hit the cloth, causing it to ripple. It reminded me of all the times I’d gotten the “you’re a fuck up, get better” talk in here.

It started that first year. I was in ninth grade and not quite as much of a shit as I was now. I was still looking to impress my father. But we came here and he went after Arthur about his grades, went after Samuel for not being serious enough, then me for what felt like… everything.

The next few years I spent trying to do better, hoping each year he would change his mind and offer me a compliment.

That day was still yet to come. I realized it was better to try to be all the things he said I was. Incompetent, head in the clouds, only focused on what I wanted. I figured I would at least make all those things true, so when he said it, I really couldn’t fight him about it.

Though I was prepared for this year’s reaming, I wasn’t looking forward to it.

“Who’s ready to play?” my father asked as he came down the stairs.

“I call Ellery,” Samuel said before anyone got settled.

“That’s because you want me to carry you,” I said.

Though I’d been terrible that first year, and the year after that, almost every bar had a pool table so I got pretty good.

“We’re just a winning pair,” he said with a toothy grin.

“Fine, I can play with dad,” Arthur said, not truly caring either way.

Arthur queued up the balls and Samuel chalked his stick, waiting for them to be set. Once ready, Sam lined up for way longer than necessary and hit the balls on the right, not fully breaking the triangle but spreading some out a bit.

Then the game began, Arthur going next, then me, then Dad. We played a few rounds like that, and balls started sinking until we were down to three and they had four.

“How are you and Tiffany?” Dad asked Arthur.

Now it starts, I thought to myself.

“Fine,” he said, not elaborating further.

“That’s good,” Dad said. “Her father is a fine man. Just make sure your eye is on the ball. We all know the company needs to be your focus for your future.”

“I agree,” he said, missing his shot.

Arthur had always been better at doing this. Maybe it was because he’d been getting these talks for so long, he became numb to it. Or maybe they have similar talks all the time. Arthur and Dad worked so close together every day it must have come up at least some times.

We played another round, almost nothing changing. Dad managed a lucky shot that tied us up.

“And Samuel, how are you and Rachel?”

His eyes got all dreamy the way they did any time anyone said her name. “Amazing. We’re getting a puppy,” he said.

I rolled my eyes. Had he learned nothing by now.

Father’s brows rose. “A puppy is a lot of responsibility and you’re both so busy.”

“I know, but we have plans for a sitter while we work, and it will be nice to have company in the house.”

“You know, if you started having kids soon, things would get less lonely.”

The irony of not having time for a dog but having time to produce an entire child was lost on him, it seemed.

“We will when we’re ready,” Samuel said firmly.

“You should be ready soon. You’re not getting any younger.”

I was spinning my pool cue, watching the two of them go at it. Though Samuel didn’t just take it like Arthur normally did, he always ended up shrugging and changing the subject, usually to golf. My father loved golf and could talk about it forever.

So when Arthur asked how his favorite player was doing, he was off to the races, talking about that.

We finished the game victorious and switched the teams, me with Arthur and Samuel with dad.

They won the next game when Arthur sank the eight ball before our last ball went in. We then switched it again, me with Dad, and Arthur and Samuel together.

We were in the middle of the game when my father remembered he hadn’t given me my lecture yet. “How are things with Juniper?” he asked.

“Fine,” I said. Over the years I’d learned from Arthur that less is more when it came to him.

“Seems more than fine. You’ve started gifting her. So you’re serious?”

“Seems that way,” I said.

It was my turn and we were stripes. I lined up my shot with the fifteen and sunk it into the corner hole.

“Don’t be coy,” my father said, clapping me on the back as I was trying to line up my shot into the side pocket. “You obviously intend to marry her.”

I didn’t. But either way, it wasn’t his business. “We’ll see.”

Samuel scoffed. “Yeah, maybe she’ll say no.”

I flipped him off and watched as he winked at me.

I took my shot, barely missing, making it Samuel’s turn.

I stood back from the table, circling the pool cue between my hands, back and forth.

“Don’t fidget so much,” my father said, as if I could stop it. “Its a sign of an un-calm mind.”

He was interrogating me, what did he expect?

“Anyway,” he continued. “What do you think of her intentions?”

“Intentions?” I parroted.

“Well, we know she’s from a more… modest background. Do you think that’s what she cares about?”

“No,” I snapped. I instantly regretted it. Showing any kind of vulnerability gave him room to sink his claws in further.

“Are you sure? She said she worked at a coffee shop? Seems like you’re an easy ticket to a step up.”

My jaw clenched. I didn’t mind when he talked about me that way, but I wasn’t going to sit here and let him talk about her that way.

“Juniper has her own plans. She’s developing an app in her spare time, not that I need to explain any of that to you. She’s not just using me for my money, and any further insinuation about it is an insult to her and I would suggest you stop.”

The room turned silent, everyone looking at me. No one talked back to my father, at least not directly. We all just took it to the chin, sometimes making jokes along the way, but never actually saying anything. But this wasn’t about me, this was about her.

Arthur had his same blank glance. Samuel looked a bit nervous, and my father had the same hard stare I was used to.

I approached the table, lined up my shot, and sank the eight ball into the left pocket. The sound of the clinking balls rang through the room, echoing off the walls.

I set the cue on the table in the way I knew my father hated. “Looks like we lost,” I said before turning and heading up the stairs, taking them two at a time until I was walking through the lobby.

I didn’t need to stand there under my father’s scrutiny, questioning my girlfriend.

I stopped. She wasn’t my girlfriend, though. I didn’t like the insinuation my father tried to make about her, but she wasn’t my girlfriend to defend, at least not for real. And there was money in play. A lot of it in fact, but that was a mutual agreement, not some ploy on her end.

If anything, we were here because of me. Because I wanted my family off of my back. But now things felt wrong. It felt as if this very solid line we’d drawn in the beginning was being blurred by the minute, and I didn’t know what I wanted anymore. Or what she actually wanted.

“There you are,” Samuel said from behind me.

I turned on my heel to face him.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

I shrugged. “Fine.”

He scoffed. “Sure. Let’s get a drink.”

I followed him to the bar on the other side of the resort. It was the main one, with floor to ceiling windows that looked out over the ski slope. Thank god it’d just opened and was mostly empty.

I ordered a Negroni while Samuel stuck to a hard cider.

“Did you pull the small straw having to talk to me?” I asked once we got our drinks.

He barked a laugh. “No. Arthur had to stay with dad. And that’s way worse.”

I supposed that was true, but couldn’t muster up any amusement. My head was a mess.

“Are things really going well?” Samuel asked. He didn’t look at me while he did, always avoiding anyone’s gaze while talking about something hard.

“Yes,” I said.

Last night felt like it flipped everything on its head and made me see our situation differently. But I had no idea what was going on in her mind. Yes, we agreed on physical release, but last night felt more than physical. And I didn’t know how to cope with that.

“Then why are you worried about what dad thinks?”

“I’m not,” I said. “I just don’t like him talking about June that way.”

“I get that,” he said. “When I told him I was going to marry Rachel, he asked me if she was too similar to me.”

“Why?”

He sighed. “Because we’re both fun, and he felt like I needed someone to balance me. A.K.A. he wanted me to find someone more serious to make me serious.”

I had no idea he’d said that. Despite the fact that they were too in love for me, Rachel and him fit like a glove. “What did you say?”

“To be honest, I worried he was right.”

I blinked. “Why would you be worried about that?”

He raised his brow at me. “You’re not the only one he’s been reaming our entire lives. He’s always thought I wasn’t serious enough, and because I was the spare to the heir, he had to worry about me a little bit. I didn’t get it as bad as Arthur, and you got it way less harsh than either of us.”

“I don’t think that’s true.” Any time that man and I were in the same room he commented about something.

“That’s because you get to work in your office on the other side of the building. Everyday it’s ‘Samuel, the clients aren’t friends, stop being so nice.’ But I also get the most deals and that’s why.

“And the more I thought about what he said, the more I realized how wrong he really was. Rachel is perfect for me. Not his vision of me, but who I truly am. So I proposed to her anyway and it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

I leaned back in the barstool, considering his words. I assumed Arthur had it much worse than all of us, but Samuel had always seemed so… normal. He was always happy and Dad didn’t say much, at least not in front of me. But maybe that was part of the problem. Maybe this was more of an act that I thought. His own form of being the family fuck up.

“We should all probably go to therapy, huh?” I asked.

He laughed then. “I am.”

My brows rose. “Really?”

He nodded. “Rachel convinced me to go, and it’s really helped.”

That made sense. Rachel was good for him. And even if I was joking, it was probably true. Though I thought therapy was a good idea, I’d never gone because any time someone talked about it my father gave the very patriarchal answer of “men don’t need therapy,” which had probably stuck with me longer than it should.

I added that to the mental list of things I’d tell my therapist one day.

“That’s great.”

We fell into a brief silence. It was snowing outside and I watched the flakes come down, bathing the world in a sheen of white. The large hearth crackled in the corner, and the smell of burning wood was heavy around us.

“I do like her,” Samuel said.

“Yeah?”

He nodded. “You need someone willing to tell you you’re wrong. And she likes when I make fun of you, and Rachel loves her. Can’t get any better than that.”

Over the past week, I’d seen her get closer with my family and had felt she had fit well, but hearing him say that settled that into place.

“Thanks, Sam,” I said.

He shrugged. “Hey, we’re all in this trauma bond together now.”

I laughed. He was right, and while I felt better, my head was still a mess about Juniper.