12

One week, down.

And so was my face; down in the dirt, that is. My gloves were shredded from the number of times I had to catch myself from planting my nose in the ground. A bitter taste of grass lingered on my tongue.

“You’re really coming along, aren’t you, Jess?” Mallory taunted as she kept me under her heel. “You almost hit me that time.”

She flicked her white hair to the side before letting me up. We were about to start a new round of combat practice but be fore Mallory could call dibs again, Zak requested that I be his partner. I thanked the heavenly gods for that one.

The days flew by on a similar schedule. I’d shower late at night, eat in the cafeteria, and get my ass handed to me in training with my peers. Each of them welcomed a new method of pain. I did my part to avoid attention from the angry werewolf or vampire queen, but Mallory was always enthusiastic to “help” me practice.

It didn’t help that my physical abilities were on the decline. I had a guess it was due to my withdrawals. Everything felt heavier like I had stones strapped to my ankles. Zak gave me small doses of my aunt’s medicine until the other day, then we went cold turkey.

The headaches worsened, like a nail being pounded into the front of my skull. My skin and hair had faded in color. Instead of red tones, or even soft brown, I looked dry and ashen. The food at EXO was filling but left me feeling starved. I should have been healthier from all the exercise not falling apart.

The withdrawals had to end soon…

Before I began training with Zak, he cracked his neck and removed his sweater. I half expected him to glitter gold. “We only have seven more weeks to get you in top shape for the exam. Sounds like a lot, but it’ll blow by fast,” he said, “Hope you’re ready for me.”

Not really , I wanted to say. I knew I couldn’t rely on his favoritism forever. Eventually, EXO would task me with something more dangerous than Mallory.

“Okay, J-J-J-JESS.” Zak clapped his hands as he cheered. “We’re gonna go over some simple defensive tactics. Did your aunt ever teach you any cool tricks?”

The last thing I wanted to do was keep moving, but I attempted to mirror Zak’s energy.

“Only some,” I said.

He chuckled. “Okay, let’s have you face me first. We have a lot to go over before tapping into your special abilities. Let’s pretend I’m coming at you. No weapons. Just act like I’m some creep on the street or something.”

I almost laughed. Zak couldn’t look villainous if he tried.

He moved toward me and his expression changed. His eyes lost their light and his smile faded. I lost the strength in my stance. Nevermind. He could pull off the villainous type just fine.

“Keep your knees bent.” He instructed. “Eyes up, chin down. Hold up your fists for me.”

I scrambled to get in position before he reached me. When his arm came up my immediate action was to flinch and fall back.

Zak moved his pointer finger discouragingly. “Hey. If you’re going to defend yourself instead, don’t leave your head so ex posed. Any vampire, shifter, demon, angel , can hit like a truck and one swing to the head could be fatal or knock you out cold.”

Yeah. Mallory didn’t exactly hit like a fairy.

He did not hold back. Zak’s hits felt like blocking cannon fire. I knew if he held back it would only be a disservice, but damn . It was a tough call between embarrassment and frustration that I couldn’t improve, even after further instruction. Zak mentioned it wasn’t for lack of understanding the technique. I was just… slowing down.

That is, until our last round when I’d gotten daring and tried punching Zak’s chin. He grabbed my fist and used my momentum to pull me forward. His other arm curled around my neck in a chokehold.

“We’ll practice more tomorrow,” he said, “Nicely done.”

I tried to gulp but it got stuck in my throat. Despite us both perspiring, his breath on my neck gave me goosebumps. Our position was far from romantic, but his entire body pressed against mine kept me from thinking straight.

Zak released me and casually wiped his brow. “I was thinking we could stick around after training and practice that little magic trick you used against the Ghoul. We might need a lot of open space… Jess?”

A sharp pain struck the front of my skull, harder that time, and traveled to my toes. I gasped. My vision turned purple. I felt myself falling forward but caught myself on my knees.

“Jess?” Zak reached for me again. As soon as his arms lifted me up, I dug my fingers into his shoulders. I was going to black out. I just knew it. My head felt muddled and made me dizzy. Zak was the lighthouse keeping me from drifting toward the dark sea.

I needed him.

Zak’s fresh, citrusy scent helped calm my mind. To avoid the pain, I imagined an orange grove surrounded by wet soil, the woodsy aroma from the bark, and morning dew on the leaves. He was at the center of it all like a ball of sunshine keeping everything alive.

Finally, I felt my desperation dwindling. The pain in my head subsided. When I opened my eyes, I was looking directly into Zak’s chest.

No wonder his scent was so strong. I was literally sticking my face in it. Oh, gods . I wanted to die. It was nice, don’t get me wrong, but if it were possible to explode from embarrassment, I would’ve splattered all over the yard.

His chin rested on the top of my head while his arms secured me in place. I didn’t know why he was allowing it to happen but it went on for too long. I sprang back like a frightened cat. “I’m sorry! I-I don’t know why I did that,” I said.

“Careful. Don’t fall over.” Zak’s grin was crooked. I felt like I’d crossed a line. He was still a commander for EXO. An angel . What if I’d made him uncomfortable or put him in an awkward spot? Unfortunately, several faces had observed what went down between Zak and me. Max wiped his dripping scalp and scowled. His sparring partner, Barrett, was still distracted and didn’t quite catch Max’s next blow to the stomach.

Tori levitated off her toes to reach Guy’s ear. She whispered something behind her cupped hand. I could only imagine what. Pining for their acceptance felt icky, but I couldn’t help desiring it too. If I had to be there, I wanted to find my place in our group.

“Let’s get you to Clove,” Zak said, “We’re overdue for a visit, anyway.”

***

Zak’s first thought after hugging me was to see a doctor.

Clove was EXO’s supernatural medical specialist. I couldn’t remember the last time I went to see anyone about my health. Naomi had her natural remedies and with my elevated healing, a need never arose.

Inside of EXO tower was an entire floor dedicated to this Clove person. Luckily, we got to ride an elevator all the way up. Severe injuries must have been dealt with off-base seeing as the hike to the medical floor was inconveniently near the top.

As soon as we entered the hall, I was hit with an unpleasant, chemical scent. The sparkling white tile irritated my eyes. I felt another jolt through my body and leaned against the wall.

Zak made to assist me again. “Easy does it,” he said.

“I’m good.”

I tried being as polite as I could while pulling away. Leav ing his embrace earlier was worse than stepping out of a hot shower. I wasn’t sure I had the strength a second time. Besides, I didn’t want to get him in trouble with any more hugging. “Does Clove know that I’m…”

“A demon?” he asked, “Yeah. Don’t worry about that.”

I nodded. “You don’t seem surprised this is happening.”

“I’m not. You need energy to survive as a demon, half or not. I’m not just talking about human food.” When I staggered, Zak lifted me off of the wall and I didn’t protest that time. “Hang on. Almost there.”

The hallway felt like the boardwalk to eternity, or had that been my imagination stirring? What if it was like the mov ies, where they bring me to a friendly facility only to cut me up and divvy out my organs? It sounded bonkers but that shit was real.

We approached a pair of double doors with a security lock. All Zak had to do was knock and say, “Hey, Clove!” and someone buzzed us in.

“Come in.” A female voice said.

I chewed my bottom lip while gazing at the many diagrams of other supernaturals that hung on the walls. Machines hummed, warmed up, and ready to perform. I tried my best to ignore the test tube cabinets and shiny torture utensils lying in trays along the counters.

“Jessebel Winters. Have a seat.”

I hadn’t spotted the woman yet in the sea of shelves, but I did find the chair verbally offered to me. It came with restraints; straps and metal clamps for the ankles and wrists.

Cozy .

When I hesitated, Zak gave me a bump on the shoulder.

“Jess, this is Clove.” He introduced me to a stiff woman in a lab coat who skirted around a bookshelf. Behind her sheet of black hair were a pair of transparent wings. Equally glossy to match her black mane were antennae. They peered out from her scalp and bounced along with her movements.

Clove’s pointed nose stabbed in our direction, her cheek bones and chin just as sharp. All common traits among fairies. The adorable, silver freckles, like rhinestones under her eyes, didn’t suit her otherwise cold demeanor.

“Hello,” I said, but Clove gestured one tiny hand toward the chair again. She waited until I complied to move one of the straps across my chest.

“How are you feeling?” she asked, “Zakiel texted me that you’re blacking out.”

“Yeah…” Sitting helped even if the straps concerned me. “Are these really necessary?”

“Considering past experiences with patients like yourself, yes.” She lifted my eyelid and shone a small flashlight through my brain. “Has this been happening a lot or just recently?”

“Recently,” I said. A cabinet of needles and tubes taunted me from behind her. It was kept cool and left a layer of fog on the glass windows. Some of the tubes already contained varying shades of blood, labeled differently with letters and numbers that meant nothing to me.

Blood wasn’t just the liquid that kept our fleshy bodies func tioning. It was treated as currency, especially in the vampire market. The younger, fresher, and healthier, the better. But blood was also used for much crueler intentions like spells, curses, and other rituals. I got a lot of my horror stories from Naomi.

“Our samples never leave this room.” Clove’s slender finger pointed to the cabinet I’d been eyeballing. “I do all the testing myself. We won’t poke you today, though.”

I sighed, relieved. “You alone?”

“It would be easier if I were a vampire. I know.” She sounded tired like it was something she had to repeat often. “But I do just fine without having to sample my samples.”

I smacked my lips, imagining a taste-testing clinic run by vampires. I’d heard of such ideas but they hadn’t been popular with the public. With Roman Blaxill’s vampire involvement with the medical field, that could change.

Clove did a routine check of my vitals. I took a deep inhale and forced my neck to relax against my headrest. Zak’s eyes lin gered on me, but they had a faraway look about them. He was miles away.

“You’re staying?” I asked him.

“Would you prefer I didn’t?” he asked.

“No, but you probably have better things to do.”

“What could be more fun than this?” He grinned. “You’re kind of my responsibility, so I’m gonna make sure you’re okay. Besides, we don’t want to stress Jarmiel into an early grave.”

I could tell something else was weighing on Zak’s shoulders. His heavenly glow was decent camouflage, but even his obnoxious peppiness had gone down a notch to follow his slouching figure. “You seem tired,” I said, “I hope it’s not because of me.”

“Says the girl who almost passed out in the hallway,” he countered.

“ Neither of you looks well,” Clove stated. “Even angels need to take care of themselves. Work problems, Zakiel?”

He let out a breath that shrank his chest like a balloon. “Something like that. This guy’s slippery.”

“What guy?” I asked.

“We’ve been looking for someone. A criminal who tampers with the dead.” Zak paused. “We call him The Necromancer for obvious reasons. That creature you saw the other night was one of his Ghouls. He makes them from bodies he collects. Real nasty business.”

Anyone could guess that after taking one look at the Ghoul, but it was still disturbing to hear. “The Necromancer planned for that thing to be at Peter’s house?” I asked.

What business did a notorious necro-freak have in a place like Haverwick?

“The attacks seem to be random,” Zak said, “He doesn’t target anywhere more than once and takes new corpses every time.”

“So, he controls the dead and is slowly making an army?” I shivered, imagining a hoard of Ghouls. The Necromancer had to have a strong stomach and a gaping hole for a heart to create that level of patchwork.

“Seems that way,” Zak spoke so softly I could barely hear him. He ran his thumb over his chin, pinching the skin until it made a butt. I felt bad making him speak more about it but I was too invested now. “We’ve also run into individual puppets before. They’re silent, sometimes indistinguishable from the av erage person, depending on how recently they died. The longer they’re dead before reanimation, the more stumbly and drooly they are”

“Is he working alone?” I asked, “Can’t the reapers do anything about this?”

His laugh was strained. “Oh, they’re mad. It’s going to cause a war on the other side any day now. As far as we know, he is on his own aside from his creations . You’d think having Ghouls around that he’d be easy to find.”

He stopped and a smile spread across his face. “You handled the Ghoul, no problem.”

“I wouldn’t say it was no problem.” I cringed at my own humble brag. Another minute in that driveway and I would have been toast. “I didn’t know I could… What happened to me anyway?”

Clove wrapped up her examination and jotted some notes on a clipboard. The sound of her furious scribbles shocked me back into our current reality. “Something happened?” she asked.

“She has a connection to dark matter. And like any magic, it can be tricky,” he said, “It could have something to do with your blackouts.”

Clove clicked her tongue. “ Magic …What have you been eating Jessebel?”

For some reason, I drew a blank. Before EXO, I hadn’t been much of a breakfast person but that cafeteria changed my mind.

“Waffles?” I said.

Her beady eyes darted across my face.

“What do you do for actual nourishment, I mean? Are you at least eating red meat?”

“Jess has been on a homemade supplement most of her life,” Zak said, helping me with my brain fart, “We’ve been weaning her off. It’s only been a couple days without.”

“That’s something to tell me.” She raised one of her thin brows. “Do we know what’s in it?”

“Not really.” I felt a pool of dread in my stomach. The real question was, did we want to know?

Zak’s eyes softened but Clove wasn’t as tactful.

“Demons feed off humans. Souls,” she said, “Not a practice we normally encourage.This supplement you have may have been acting like synthetic blood for vampires. By the looks of things, it’s not enough to sustain your body anymore. You’re starving.”

I looked to Zak for a positive retort.

“It’s possible that when you used your demon magic to kill the Ghoul it screwed with your diet,” he said.

“Wait. Am I dying ?” I asked, shifting in my seat.

So, I was just going to wither away unless I hunted people like livestock? My stomach acids sizzled. How could it possibly be what my body wants when the idea made me physically ill? How was I so sure Naomi hadn’t ever.

No . She wouldn’t have fed me actual human beings in secret; disguised as filets or ground organs in my tea. No way in hell. When would she have had the time to visit the human meat market? Illegal, by the way, if that wasn’t obvious.

But I sure came up with those ideas fast…

“So we up the dosage, right?” I asked, “I mean, I can’t eat people.”

I gagged, and that was Zak’s cue to come to the rescue. He pushed off the wall behind him and took the other side of my chair. “Keep your breakfast down. We’re not jumping to cannibalism.”

Clove hurried off to a room in the back while I focused on not throwing up. Zak held up an open palm and wiggled his fingers. “Your touch,” he said, “Remember? What demons actually need is the soul, or life force, and your contact with others can help you do so. Weaker demons tend to eat flesh because they lack the magic or intelligence to extract it any other way.”

“How lovely,” I said, feeling my own spirit flattening, “Doesn’t that mean I still have to kill someone?”

Would there be a point to living if it meant I had to kill others to do it? That was how the food chain worked, but it was all wrong. Evil. If that was how demons worked, then how did angels survive? They weren’t human either.

“A vampire doesn’t have to kill to feed,” Zak said, “It’s a choice. The human body will replenish blood. The same goes for soul matter.”

When I could only pull off looking more confused he winced. “ Ah … sorry, let me explain. The soul’s core is separate from the surrounding soul matter. Think of it like eating an apple. You can chew the outside, just don’t bite the core.”

“Who bites the core?” I asked.

“It’s just an example.”

“That doesn’t seem scientifically sound.”

Zak raised a brow. “Peter is still alive, isn’t he?”

Clove made an abrupt return carrying an armful of wires that she dumped on the counter. She removed the awful straps from my arms. “We’re going to test something. Zakiel, over here.”

Once I was freed, Zak placed himself right in front of me while Clove taped the wires she brought to our bodies. I avert ed my eyes when she reached inside of Zak’s shirt.

Just kidding. I totally looked and discovered a new appreciation for collarbones.

But then, Clove said something like, “Just remove it.”

His caramel hair looked like straw blown by the wind after he pulled the shirt over his head. He could’ve been hiding a gut under there and he still be gorgeous, but the four-pack he nurtured was nice. I dropped my head to stare at his shoes instead. It felt like an even worse sin to ogle at an angel’s body. Even so, I couldn’t erase the image of his solid chest from my mind.

Once Clove had us all hooked up like bugs in a mangled spiderweb, a Chief Communications Strategist monitor beeped to life. I realized quickly that the tones were in tune with my pulse. Gods . I need help.

“What do you know about succubi?” Clove asked.

“Just that they’re trademarked as the demons of debauchery,” I said.

“Remove your gloves,” she instructed while scratching one of her long antennae. “Take Zakiel’s hand and we’ll see if anything changes.”

I didn’t move. Zak had to, gently, wrestle one of my stub bornly clenched fists and tried interlacing our fingers. “C’mon. I don’t have cooties,” he laughed, “We’re trying to help you.”

He was right. It shouldn’t have been a big deal, but I still felt awkward about it.

“I’m not going to hurt him, right?” I asked.

“Zakiel is a durable subject,” Clove answered.

Zak winked at me while she couldn’t see. “I don’t know how to take that compliment, Clove.”

After about a minute, Clove glanced at the machine a few times and mulled. “Try again, Jess. Picture the energy beneath the surface.”

Beneath the surface?

He’s already half-naked!

I closed my eyes just as the loud beeping started up again. That was my heart rate alright.

“Hey,” Zak’s calm humor entered my ears, “Everything’s fine.”

I could hear him stifling his chuckle and made the mistake of looking up again; enchanted by the brown crystals in the middle of his face. His thumb made circles in the back of my hand which, by some miracle, slowed my heart.

It was just like before with the sunshine and orange fields. The more I focused on Zak’s hand, the more warmth traveled up my arm. It flowed through my veins like liquid fire until all of me felt awakened by the internal sun. The aching I’d been feeling for days was gone.

“Feel anything yet, Zakiel?” Clove asked.

“Just a tickle,” he said.

Clove waited by the monitor with her eyes peeled. “Picking up some readings now. How do you feel, Jessebel?”

“Better,” I admitted.

Her lips curled. “Good. You’ll need to learn how to nourish yourself regularly and safely. The hardest part for you will be portion control. Not for you but for others.”

“How do I do that?”

“Practice and listen to your gut.”

Great.

Clove removed us from her machines and Zak threw his shirt back on. My heart could finally catch a break. How many people had been so lucky to see The Angel of Mercy like that. I might’ve been obsessing, just a little.

“I would avoid any intimate relationships until you’ve learned how to prevent absorbing someone’s vitality when you touch them,” Clove said, like she could read my impure thoughts.

“I… agree,” I said, “But how do I practice that without risk?”

Zak interjected. “You haven’t forgotten about me, right?”

“You want us to do this during training?” My voice cracked. If he wanted me to start holding hands with Mallory, I’d quit.

“Well, yeah. It’s not just going to keep you alive. It should make you stronger too. It may even be why you were able to use demon magic in the first place.” He drummed his fingers on my knuckles. “It’s only evil if you make it so. It saved your life. You get control of this, and you won’t have to worry about accidents again.”

Zak’s eyes burned with determination. I knew he wanted to use me. That was the whole reason I was there, but an angel wanting me to eat souls and use demon magic felt backwards. “We’ll practice everyday. Consider it extended training,” he said.

Clove already had the area looking organized during our conversation. She paused from her fluttering to rest her wings against the wall. “If anything new develops, or you lose consciousness again, come see me right away. I wouldn’t be surprised if your body experiences more sudden changes.”

What else ? Horns and a tail?

“Sounds good,” I said.

“I’d also like to get some bloodwork done, once you’re feeling up to it.”

“Do we have to?”

“If you want to be a peacekeeper, yes,” she said.

I swallowed. She said she did all the testing herself. No one else should’ve had access. If anything, they could use my blood to learn more about me. Maybe that was why I hesitated.

“Thanks for everything, Clove,” Zak said.

She gave him a nod and shortly after we were dismissed.