Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Ashley

Settlingon the ranch wasn’t all that hard. My first full day working with the guys felt more like a reunion than anything. I wanted to tell them I knew bits and pieces of them, but I figured it would make things more awkward.

Corey and I still hadn’t said how we met. I could see the others giving us curious glances from time to time as we ate or worked together. Not one of them pressed the issue though.

I think it had more to do with all the other stuff happening than their lack of wanting to know. Gerald was still gone a week after being released and the men were getting desperate.

“We should put up a missing person’s report with the sheriff,” Travis said at breakfast after the first two days proved useless. “At least then they’ll be looking for him.”

“That’s not always the case. It’s a big area for the sheriff to cover. I doubt he’ll be on the hunt for just one person.” Harlan, who I’d learned was exactly as grumpy as I’d been told, spoke up to correct the young man.

Elton jumped in to explain further. “He’s not wrong. Unless the person is famous, the authorities tend to add it to their case files. It’s not like it’s murder or something.”

“Easy, baby. There’s no need to get so dark about it.” Bobby Allen’s use of my nickname didn’t send the same power of desire through me like when Corey used it. The two men were so wholly different that I didn’t feel as if I were in danger of answering the wrong Daddy, thank goodness.

We decided to give it until the end of the week before anyone went to the authorities. Since it was now the weekend again, I sat at the kitchen table patiently as I listened to who would call it in.

“I think it should be me,” Corey said when the room went quiet after finishing their food. Harlan’s food sank in my stomach at the fierce determination in his furrowed brow.

Was there something there? Had there been? I know he never mentioned it in the letters, but my own insecurities had a way of making me question it all.

Oblivious to my inner turmoil, the men kept up the discussion on what would happen next. Atticus spoke up to ask why Corey felt he was the right person to do so.

“It’s my ranch, and he technically works for me. I don’t understand your logic,” he’d said.

“That’s all good and true; however, I was the one who dropped him off. My name is on the paperwork showing he checked in.” Corey sighed as his shoulders fell. “I feel like I should have noticed something along the way. Maybe if I’d asked him about after, then he’d have shared his plan to run.”

“That’s not how it would have gone,” I said before thinking about it. All eyes turned to me with curious glances.

“Care to elaborate?” Atticus motioned for me to expand.

I took a deep breath before saying, “There aren’t a lot of guys who go AWOL or decide to end their lives while enlisted, but there are a few. Those men tend to keep their plans close to the vest. Anytime they’d interview friends and family, they’d all say the same thing — they never suspected. It wasn’t even a possibility in their minds. Gerald running after rehab wasn’t in the plan. You never suspected he’d do this. See how similar it seems?”

“Well yes. This is different, though.” Sean spoke up before Atticus could reply. The other man’s eyes were unfocused, like he was lost to his own line of thinking.

“It’s not all that different. At the root of it all, he kept part of himself hidden. He’ll either come back on his own, or you’ll have to search high and low to find him. It might be a mix of both before it’s all said and done.”

The group of men took my words at face value. Murmurs of agreement rang out, though I couldn’t really hear most. My left side could pick everything up fine. The right was less functional. I’d been adjusting to keep that part of me covered up since arriving on the ranch. So far I hadn’t had anyone mention anything.

Most surprising Daddy hadn’t pressed for details even though I was sure he knew something. I was thankful for that since I didn’t want to relive those memories quite yet.

Corey might have been keeping our past a secret from the others on the ranch, but he wasn’t the only one with things to hide. I had things he didn’t know as well. Memories that I wanted buried beneath my conscious mind.

“Why don’t you both go?” Griffin took the chance to say his piece in a moment of silence.

“Both of us?” Corey asked as Atticus’s brows rose.

Griffin nodded. “Yeah, both. You each have a different reason for being there and why that’s important. If you go together, then maybe they’ll even take it a bit more seriously. The Coleman name holds weight around here and with Corey’s charm, there’s no way they’ll ignore it.”

“You think I’m charming, doggie doc?” Corey teased.

“I’m a vet for large farm animals. It’s not often I take a look at dogs these days. And yes, you can be charming when you want to be. How else did Ashley wind up on the porch when none of us had ever even heard of him?”

“Shots fired!” Beau drummed his hands on the tabletop, then made shooting gun motions at me and Corey.

“Before this devolves into a teasing session, I’d like to steal Corey away for the day to get this handled. Is everyone else going to be fine?” He asked the room even as his gaze locked on me. I gave him a slight nod to let him know I’d be fine as everyone else tossed out their replies.

They left soon after, and I got paired with Bobby Allen to help with the horses. Apparently, it was a job Elton typically did, but with Corey gone, he and Travis were going to work together to tackle the cattle. I didn’t much mind either way so long as I had tasks to complete.

Bobby Allen put me to work right away mucking stalls and hosing down equipment. It was mindless work that only required me to flex my muscles. For others, it might have meant they’d go to a dangerous place in their minds. My situation was the opposite.

Now that I was a civilian, it was like my daytime hours were relaxing. Even if I did backbreaking work all day and sweated buckets, I still felt much better than I did in my prior life.

The nights were a different story. I was having nightmares at least once a night. Sometimes I woke Daddy up. Others he slept through my panic.

I was a work in progress.

I had a feeling we all were.

There was an air about the Coleman Ranch that spoke of men finding hope there. I’d noticed it the moment I’d met Harlan and Griffin at the market. From there, I saw it all around me. The animals, the land, it all created a space that was safe for these vastly different people to come together and heal.

I think that’s part of why I’m shocked Gerald didn’t return. The people here loved him so much, and they only wanted to see him get better. On the flip side of things, though, I considered the pain he must have felt by sticking around after the one man he loved was gone.

There wasn’t a cure for a heartache like that. Not even time could mend it completely.

I was so deep in my thoughts of what he must be going through, I almost missed the tugging on my pants. I turned around, thinking one of the horses must have wandered over to get my attention.

Instead of a large animal, I found a small human. An adorably small human I’d never met before.

Looking around the stables, I wondered who he could belong to. The boy watched me intently, as if he were waiting for me to introduce myself and not at all like he’d been the one to sneak up on me.

Bending down to one knee, I stuck out my hand. “I’m Ashley. Nice to meet you.”

He grinned as he took my hand. Tiny fingers disappeared into my palm as I closed my fingers over his hand.

“My name is Dakota. Ashley is a girl name.”

I barked out a laugh at his boldness. “I guess to some it is. My mama thought it was a lovely name though, and she wanted me to have it.”

“Dat’s nice. I don’t know who picked my name. Probably Dada did it.” His lip puckered, and he tapped his chin like he was in some comedic movie role.

“Where is your Dada?”

“I dunno. I want to see horses.” The boy tugged my hand as he pointed towards the pen. I knew Bobby Allen was out there working with some of the horses to make sure they were doing well. He occasionally rode them, but mostly he let them play and explore on their own.

As we made it to the opening of the door, the boy pointed to the fence at the side. “Lift me,” he said as he pointed from his chest to the railing.

I thought it over for a second, then thought why not. Grabbing him up, I sat him on the rail so he’d be chest height with me. I kept hold of him as we watched Bobby Allen work.

Should I have found out where Jackson had run off to without his son? Sure. I only knew who his father was because he’d told me his name. I’d completely forgotten about the boy being here at all since he wasn’t here when I arrived, and no one had mentioned him in the days since.

But now I remembered the stories Corey told me. The ones where Jackson fought to have his son stay with him and how the mother was a supreme problem for everyone not all that long ago.

“Dakota!! Where did you sneak off to?” Beau’s voice came from the other side of the stables where I’m sure the little boy had wandered through.

He didn’t move a muscle at the sound, even though I knew he’d heard his name. The tiny grin he wore said it all. He wanted to get caught. I just couldn’t figure out why.

Beau rushed through the stables, then came to an abrupt halt at the sight of me supporting Dakota on the post. “Oh, thank fu-udge you found him. I was so worried.”

“You shoulda stopped kissing Dada when I said to Beau. Then I wouldn’ta made it allll the way here.” Dakota batted his lashes at Beau from over his shoulders.

I had to hide my laugh at his sassy demeanor. Instead of getting angry like some people might have done, Beau grinned big.

“’Bout time you learned to act a little like me, munchkin. I’m just sorry your Dada wasn’t here to see it,” he said.

“I’m actually here, and I did catch that. Why don’t you tell me what you’re up to, bud?” Jackson stood off to the side of the pen with his arms crossed. His stern expression made the boy in my arms giggle.

Further proof that this was a safe space.

“Dada! Ashley helped me watch horses. He’s not a girl though. Don’t be confused about it like I was.” Dakota patted my cheek, then pointed to the horses.

Jackson and Beau met in the middle as they came to stand beside me. “I feel like he’s insulting me a little, but it’s so cute I don’t much care.”

The two men laughed at my words. “He’s blunt, that’s for sure. It’s only getting worse the more time he spends with his favorite person.”

Beau whoops softly. “Heck yes I am! Come on, Dakota. Let’s go con Harlan out of something sweet. I bet he won’t tell you no.”

He swept the young man away before either of us could say a word against him. Honestly, though, I wouldn’t say anything negative. I want something sweet myself.

“Thanks for keeping him in one place. If you hadn’t grabbed him, he’d likely be climbing a tree or a horse or something. That boy has more energy than I know what to do with most days.”

I nodded to Jackson. “Nothing to it. He demanded I pick him up once he pulled me away from work.”

“Shit. I need to tell him not to do that, I guess. He’s so curious these days. It’s hard keeping him busy. Plus, he really likes the horses. My parents had him for a few weeks, which means he didn’t get much time to explore. My mom prefers he stay safe inside with her.”

“He’s no problem, Jackson. I’ll still get the work done, and he got to see what he wanted. No need to explain it to me.”

The man shook with his laughter. “I don’t think I even told you about him being mine. How’d you know he wasn’t some random kid who wandered out here?”

I froze at the question. It wasn’t my choice whether or not we told the others about mine and Corey’s letters. If it had been, then they’d have known the second I showed up.

Since I was stuck in limbo, I did the best I could with my reply. “I doubt any kid wandering through the country would just happen upon me in the stables. He had to belong to someone, and I figure it was probably you.”

“Why me?” He seemed truly interested in how I deduced the answer.

I tilted my head and gave him a teasing smirk. “You give off dad energy. It’s a thing.”

He guffawed at my answer as his hand clamped on my shoulder. I fought not to tense at the friendly grip. He meant nothing by it. The hold wasn’t a threat.

“You’re fitting in just fine around these parts. Thanks again for keeping him company. I’m going to go find them before Harlan lets him eat an entire cake or something.”

I waved him away as I turned back to my work. Keeping busy was good for me. It was what I needed to do. Idle hands were always a bad thing according to my parents. Lucky for me, there was a big ranch around me and plenty of tasks to go around.