Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

Corey

I pressedthe start button on the GPS once we cleared the edge of town. I knew that there wouldn’t be too many turns before we reached the city, but I didn’t want to risk it.

Today was the day of my baby’s appointment. We were both nervous about what was ahead. Up to now, we had been making adjustments as best as possible for him under the premise that we didn’t speak about his hearing loss. After this appointment, though, we would have to come to grips with whatever news we were given.

I wanted to talk to him as I drove, but it was hard to do so when I knew he needed to read my lips to hear properly sometimes. It wasn’t all the time, though enough for me to always ensure he had a view of my mouth.

As I tried to think of a solution, he spoke up. “Daddy, I know you’re thinking about some stuff over there. I can face you and watch your lips if I stumble over a word or two. You don’t have to be quiet just because I am.”

I sent him a look that spoke of understanding. Not that I was struggling with my hearing. It was more that I understood his desire not to sit in the silence.

It was rare for us to not have something to talk about. Silence meant we were sleeping.

With all the guys we worked around, there was always some type of gossip going around. Gerald had been the topic for a while, of course. When that led to a dead end, we didn’t talk about him anymore. It was too hard.

But now…

“Do you really think that the guy Travis knew, the one Robin hired, is going to find them? What if they don’t want to be found?” He knew who ’them’ was without me asking.

It was an idea I had been pondering. When Gerald checked himself out of rehab, he dropped off the face of the Earth. And when we put out a report saying he was missing, he had the sheriff send back word he was fine and didn’t want to be bothered. Pushing him even further would only cause problems.

Which made me wonder who was person at fault here.

What if we were the problems? What if him being away from us was healing him? Would we be derailing the happiness he could have in the future by forcing ourselves upon him?

As if he could read my mind, my boy replied, “I think that he’ll find them. And I think that he’ll probably tell us whether or not we should get involved before he actually gives us any information. From the way Travis spoke about him, it seemed like he was the type that did what was best for everyone involved. Especially for someone who was basically on the run.”

I drove slowly as I thought about his words. It made sense. How many domestic violence situations were worsened at the hands of a private investigator just trying to do their job and unknowingly reconnecting the victim with their abuser?

“All I want is to know that he’s ok. At first, I really thought that bringing him back was the best option. The more time that’s passed though, I’ve really had to think and ask myself if we’re the best fit for him.”

“That’s a smart way to think, Daddy. It means you care about his happiness more than you care about your own. That’s what makes you so awesome!” He wiggled in his seat all happy like.

“Did I hear something about Ean coming to visit as well?” It had been a minute since he’d come through.

My boy drummed his fingers along the handle of the door. His body was turned towards mine, his eyes examining everything I did.

“The way Travis put it, yes. He said he would be out as soon as he could but that things have been kind of busy. Being a movie star kept him busy even without acting deals. I wouldn’t know since I don’t really watch that many movies anymore.”

“We need to rectify that soon. Ean is a phenomenal actor. More than that, I think you deserve a little more rest than you’ve had. Even coming to the ranch hasn’t been a vacation for you. You retired from the military, dammit. You’ve had an entire freaking career and yet you’re still working.”

As I said the words, anger surged through me. I wished I could provide more for him so that he didn’t have to work. We had everything we could ever want at the ranch. There was never a moment of being hungry or not having clothes or shelter.

But as his Daddy, I wanted to spoil him as well. It was just so damn hard. My boy didn’t want things like others did. He didn’t covet toys or long for bottles and diapers. He simply basked in the joy of having me support him. It was like my caring for him was a gift.

“I’m working because it’s boring not to. What kind of person would I be to sit around and watch everyone else work all day long while I did nothing? I’m able-bodied. I’m strong. I enjoy having the company of whoever I’m working with. And honestly, the animals kind of make it irresistible.”

I chuckled as I agreed with him. The animals were a lot of the charm of the ranch. The people were remarkable too; however, they didn’t have that same fluffy cuteness that our cows had.

“You’re sure? If there ever comes a time that you no longer want to work, then we’ll make the change. I’m with you to the end.”

Ashley reached over to grab my hand. We were on a long stretch of highway, and I knew there wouldn’t be any turn off soon, so I linked our fingers together.

“I’m sure, Daddy. The Coleman Ranch is where I was always meant to be. It’s home. It’s where my family is now.”

At the doctor’soffice that Sean recommended, I parked and went around to get my boy out of the truck. It was funny seeing the big rust bucket in the parking lot full of really nice model cars. You could tell from one glance it didn’t belong in the city, and neither did we.

No matter, though. We had a task to handle, and only the best would do. My boy needed to be cared for. I would not settle for anything less than excellence in his care.

That mindset, of course, is how we wound up in one of the nicest doctor’s offices in the state. Inside the building, there were crystal chandeliers and fancy furniture everywhere. It looks more like somewhere you would go to have a nice drink at the end of a workday than a medical office.

A young, pretty receptionist with curly lime green hair waved at us as we approached the counter. “Hi there. Do you have an appointment with us today?"

I gave her a nod. “This one does under the name Ashley Dunklin.”

She clicked away on her keyboard, then smiled.” Yes. I remember this appointment set up. You were very thorough in your questions. I’m glad you could make it. Just fill out these forms and initial where highlighted. The audiologist will be with you shortly.”

I took the forms from her, then motioned for my boy to take a spot on the comfy looking couch. He had gone quiet since we’d walked inside. I wasn’t sure if it was because of nerves or if he simply felt the need to let me be Daddy in this role. I had taken the liberty of making the appointment because I wanted there to be some type of progress in his journey. Now that we were here, I didn’t mind continuing to take the lead.

Together, we filled out the forms quickly. I was able to take them back up to the green-haired girl in less than five minutes. Felt like a record. There should’ve been streamers and balloons or something, especially considering that there were fourteen pages of paperwork to go through.

Once I gave her the information about the insurance, both his primary with the VA, and his secondary with the ranch, she told us it would only be another moment before we’re called back. I liked that she said we, since I had no intention of letting him out of my sight.

No sooner than I’d sat down did the door in the corner open. Another woman, this time with bright pink hair, with a clipboard in hand, called my boy’s name. She waved us both over once we stood.

“My name is Shonda. I’m happy to be assisting you today. You’ll just come in the room right here and have a seat.” She verified the information on the forms, then said, “Dr. Bev will see you soon.”

When the door closed, I turned to look at Ashley. He had a glazed over expression on his face. It was like he was here, but he wasn’t.

Cupping his cheeks, I pressed kisses along his jaw and nose and cheek. I moved slowly so he could feel the love radiating from me. I needed him to come back to himself or else this test would be pointless.

“Baby,” I whispered.

His eyes focused a bit as he looked at me. “Daddy?”

“All they’re doing is a test to see what you can and cannot hear. There’s no reason to be nervous or to worry. I will be here the entire time. And if they tell me I have to leave, then I will be standing right on the other side of that door until you’re finished. No matter what the outcome is, we’re going to take care of it together. Understand?”

“Yes, sir.”

I chuckled as the two words left his lips. “It’s been a while since you’ve had to say that. Does it feel weird now?”

“Not really. It’s strange saying it to you, though.” His little grin had relief moving through me. He was finally coming back to himself.

At that exact moment, the audiologist walked into the room. She was an older woman with gray hair and a white lab coat. Underneath, she wore a plain black dress. I realized quickly that she was more like a grandmother ready to sneak a child candy than a doctor. It would hopefully have a calming effect on my boy.

“Hello, you two handsome young men. My name is Dr. Beverly. I will be your audiologist today, and I’m here to determine what we need to do about this hearing. Which one of you is Ashley?”

The appointment continued with her asking questions about when he started to notice his hearing was changing and what the actual change sounded like. She then proceeded to give him a hearing test, which she allowed me to stay beside him for. I couldn’t hear anything because he wore headphones, but I could feel him struggling through it.

After she put away all her equipment, Dr. Beverly reviewed her information for a moment in silence before looking up. “I never enjoy telling someone bad news. The short version of it is that you do have severe hearing loss in one ear. I would highly recommend a hearing aid. It will need to be worn pretty much any time you would like to hear properly. The choice is entirely yours though.”

“What is the process for getting this started? I want him feeling his best as soon as possible.”

She smiled at me knowingly. “When you called and expressed your concerns, I had my appointment technician block off extra time at the end of this appointment in order to go ahead and get you fitted for the aids. I know that you had to travel a bit to get here, so let’s do as much as we can while you’re in the office. We can show you how to use them today with a test set and then have your permanent one sent to you. Technology has advanced so much that I can even help you get them sorted from here. I doubt they’ll be more than a few tweaks.”

“That’s great news! Isn’t it, baby?” My boy nodded absently as his gaze went to the window.

Dr. Beverly must have picked up on his frustration because she told us she would go get what was needed to finish things up and be right back with us.

There wasn’t enough time to do much but hold him close and whisper encouragement before she returned. The rest of the visit went by with her measuring him and taking molds. I barely understood half of what she said, but I knew a good evening spent online researching would bring me up to speed. I was also going to check on how we needed to care for everything to be prepared. If this was what my boy needed, then this was what he was going to get.