23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

Elias

Fifteen Years of Age

“ W here are you taking me, Jarman?” I asked from the back seat as Anne drove us to a surprise location. It was my fifteenth birthday and Shane had a whole day planned. Excitement made me vibrate in my seat. I was never good with surprises—how could I be excited if I didn’t know what I was excited for? It seemed silly.

“Patience, Mouse.”

I tapped the windowsill. “Can I have a clue?”

“Nope.” Jarman popped the P, finalizing his decision.

“I’ll be able to tell by your face—is it the ice rink?”

“We spend half our lives on the ice, why would I do that?”

“Because I love skating, I would be happy with skating.”

Shane shook his head and laughed “No, Mouse, we’re not going skating.”

I slumped, a little disappointed—Shane and I rarely got to skate on our own. “Okay, the movies?”

He rolled his eyes. “No, Mouse.”

“Mini golf?”

“No, Mouse.”

I tapped more on the windowsill trying to think of what he had planned. Then the car slowed, and I saw the sign. “The zoo!”

Shane laughed. “Yeah, you mentioned the new baby red panda—”

“Your remembered! Oh em Gee! Lets go, lets go!” I was bouncing in my seat. “There’s so much I want to see! It's been forever since I went to the zoo!” I jumped out of the car and Shane was quick to my side, smiling wide as we made our way into the mass of cute animals. There was something about knowing fun facts—especially animals—that made me happy. Winning trivia night at the Jarman’s wasn’t the only part of the fun. The more I knew, the more I had to talk about.

“Can we get the schedule? I don't want to miss any of the talks.”

Jarman’s grin widened, a piece of paper materializing from his backpack. “Already done—even if you’ve heard all the information before.”

The subtle dig made me roll my eyes. “Hey, I’m just saying you could probably do the job for these guys. I would prefer to hear you talk anyway.”

My chest warmed. “You say that like I won’t be echoing everything they say—you’ll regret bringing me here.”

Shane squeezed my shoulder. “Maybe, but it’s your birthday. Besides selfishly I like excited Eli. You make boring talks seem interesting.”

“I’ll excuse you calling it boring this time. Well let’s go!” I snatched the schedule from him, grabbing his hand and dragging him to our first destination.

By the time Anne came to pick us up, I think I may have killed Jarman. He was dragging his feet, but he looked at me with... affection made me just want to hug him as tight as I could. Anne asked us about our day and boy did she get an ear full from me. To her credit, she asked questions, keeping me engaged. Shane was quiet but somehow, he still looked at me like he hadn’t been listening to my voice all day. There was never a point even when I snuggled close to him in bed that I felt he was bored of me…And I was a lot to handle, I knew that. With my head on his chest, I finally took a breath.

“Thank you. Today was awesome.”

Shane squeezed me. “I'm glad you liked it. I especially liked the part where you told the zookeeper they were wrong.”

“Well, they can’t go around telling lies! Penguins are not monogamous. Statistically eighty five percent of Emperor Penguins switch partners each breeding season while around seventy percent of King penguins do the same. Don’t get me started on Gentoo penguins cheating. ”

Shane laughed. “I think you threw off her groove.”

“If she wanted to talk about monogamous relationships, she should have mentioned the Eurasian beaver; they’re particularly faithful.”

Shane just laughed and flattened my hair from where his breath mussed it. “Well I’d go back just so you can teach her the truth about the animal kingdom being filled with unfaithful animals.”

“Really?” I sat up, eager to know if he meant it, and he groaned.

“Yes but I need at least a month of recovery time.”

“You really are the best friend I could ever ask for.” I rested back on his chest, the exhaustion from my exciting day catching up to me.

But before I slipped under, I heard Jarman’s faded whisper, “You're the best friend I could ask for too.”

Present

The bliss from the night before washed away the moment I opened my eyes. I had to leave Shane sleeping in the bed, kissing his cheek softly and getting ready for work. I sat myself down on the dining table, stealing myself for work despite the urge to be reckless and ignore it all.The moment I checked my emails, I wish I had.

Subject: Unacceptable Loss of Client Account

Dear Eli,

I am absolutely livid, disappointed, and utterly infuriated by the news I received today. This is not just a minor setback; it's a catastrophic failure that reflects poorly not only on you but on the entire team and, ultimately, on me .

I entrusted you with responsibilities at our advertising company because I believed in your capabilities and your supposed commitment to excellence. However, your recent actions have demonstrated a severe lack of professionalism, competence, and regard for the hard work that our team has put into securing and maintaining client relationships.

Losing a client of such importance is not something that can be brushed aside or excused with feeble justifications. It represents a significant blow to our company's reputation, financial stability, and the livelihoods of everyone involved. Do you realize the consequences of your negligence?

Your failure reflects poorly on me as the head of this company. I have worked tirelessly to build and maintain this business, and I refuse to let this mishap tarnish everything we've achieved. It's not just about the loss of revenue; it's about the loss of trust, credibility, and integrity.

I demand an immediate and thorough explanation for your actions, as well as a comprehensive plan to rectify the situation and salvage whatever remains of our reputation. Furthermore, I expect you to take full responsibility for your failures and to make every effort to regain the trust of our remaining clients and stakeholders.

This is not a matter to be taken lightly, Eli. The future of our company and the livelihoods of everyone involved are at stake. I expect to see a drastic improvement in your performance and attitude moving forward, or else I will have no choice but to take decisive action.

Aiden Michaels

CEO

M Corp Marketing

My blood ran cold. I clicked the next email, which did nothing to appease the feeling in my gut.

Subject: Termination of Marketing Services Agreement Due to Unacceptable Conduct During Meeting at Inappropriate Venu e

Dear M Corp Marketing,

It is with deep disappointment and disbelief that I write to inform you of our decision to terminate our marketing services agreement with your agency, effective immediately. This decision has been necessitated by the wholly unacceptable conduct of Elias Michaels, our designated point of contact, during a recent meeting held at a completely inappropriate venue.

To our utter shock and dismay, Elias chose to host a crucial business meeting at a fraternity house, a setting wholly unsuitable for professional discourse and entirely disrespectful to the gravity of our agenda. Not only was this choice of venue profoundly unprofessional, but it also reflected a blatant disregard for the seriousness of our business relationship and the importance of the matters being discussed.

It is abundantly clear that Elias Michaels' actions were not only grossly inappropriate but also completely incompatible with the standards of professionalism and decorum that we expect from our business partners.

Asa company committed to upholding the highest standards of professionalism and integrity, we cannot, in good conscience, continue to maintain a business relationship with an agency that condones and facilitates such flagrant disregard for basic norms of conduct.

Please consider this email as formal notice of termination of our agreement. We expect all ongoing work related to our account to be immediately ceased, and we will not be held responsible for any further expenses incurred as a result of this termination.

Sincerely,

Titan Industries

Jiselle Fleur

Director.

Frat house? I didn’t have to imagine what my father thought; his disapproval was spelled out in black and white. Even if I spoke fluent French, Jiselle wasn’t impressed by my ideas—long before any inappropriate interruption. But that was something I couldn't exactly voice to my father. I knew things weren't good when he called me the day before, but I held onto the hope that I could smooth things over. However, I'd learned the hard way that in the corporate world, there was no such thing as a break. I absentmindedly tugged at the short strands of my hair, regretting ever cutting it.

The sound of the front door interrupted my thoughts and Tyler shuffled into the room, a tired smile on his lips. "Hey, Mouse." Despite the victory at his away game, he was exhausted. I knew he had another round in two days—it was a relentless schedule.

"Hey. No Hunter?" I asked, noticing the absence of our other roommate.

Tyler's smile faded slightly. "Nah, he has more away games. He's home just as I'm leaving. Two ships in the night, I'm afraid."

His words left a pang of sadness in my chest. Tyler's subdued demeanor was a stark contrast to the overly cheerful friend I'd seen just a few days ago. He gave my shoulder a small pat before retreating to his room.

Cal was next through the door, bouncing around in a blur of energy—a complete one-eighty from Tyler. He tossed his bag aside and made a beeline for the kitchen. "God, I just love New Year's Eve. The club was pumping!" His rambling about dances and men served as a welcome distraction from the doom of my morning.

Shane emerged from our room, clad only in low-hanging gray sweats, and headed straight for the coffee machine. I couldn't ignore the ache in my chest at the lack of any attention from him.

"Good God, I love living in this house,” Cal exclaimed, fanning himself dramatically. “The eye candy is real."

A bubble of anger rose in my throat, but I pushed it down, unwilling to let it surface. However, when Jarman strolled past Cal, his hand casually resting on his lower back as he inquired about his night, I felt my fists clench involuntarily. Their familiarity grated on my nerves; jealousy gnawed at my insides.

Shane, seeing that Cal was about to make breakfast, gently nudged Cal out of the kitchen and Cal responded by kissing his cheek—a gesture that felt like a slap in the face. It was the final straw. I grabbed my laptop and stormed out of the room. I knew I was being irrational but the sight of Shane's affectionate interaction with Cal only fueled my frustration at my father.

As I changed and packed my work bag, my intention was clear: I needed to find a coffee shop where I could focus and get some work done. Shane shot me a puzzled look as I reached the door, his brow furrowing in confusion. "I'm going out," I announced tersely, giving him no more detail than that—and definitely not giving him a kiss.

I closed the door behind me, leaving behind a drawn-out, "Okay..." from Shane that only added to the knot in my chest.

I drank my coffee in a daze, staring at my blank computer screen and trying to find any motivation to fix this mess. It was so much worse now that I was questioning my identity. It was almost impossible to do work while bigger problems were blaring in my mind like a news alert.

The sound of someone clearing their throat had me looking up, my eyes widening at the attractive man—the man I last saw at my parents’ holiday house.

“Hey,” Jordan said softly, giving me a timid smile.

“Uh…hey?” I felt my body go still, so many thoughts rushing through my mind like a freight train. Could he tell that I’d slept with Shane? Was this the type of guy Shane truly liked?

“Do you mind?” he gestured to the empty spot in front of me.

“Go ahead.” I worried my bottom lip as he slid into the seat.

“Look, I know this is weird—”

“Very.”

He laughed. “I just… I love Shane.”

My heart pounded. I didn’t like where this conversation was headed. “Jordan—”

“Let me finish, I love him, but I am not in love with him. We can both agree he is an easy man to love. He’s got such a good heart and if you let him, he’ll hand it over on a platter.”

He spun his to-go coffee in his hands, and I did my best to let him say what he needed to—even if I felt I would explode.

“And I presume by you being here, it means something is happening with you guys. And believe it or not, I’m happy for you. I knew he would always have a flame for you—he told me as much when we started dating. But he was so confident you didn't feel the same. But it only took me one glance at the two of you to see it—you’re made for each other.”

I nodded, staring into my own coffee so he didn't see the look in my eyes. A hand breached the distance and squeezed my wrist. I looked up into his sincere eyes and I was really struggling to dislike the guy, but then I remembered he’d had sex with Shane and my blood started to boil—and not in the fun way.

Jordan chuckled and retracted his hand. “Sorry, too soon. Where I am going with this is—Shane and I weren’t meant to be, and the hopeless romantic in me wants you two to work out. I know things have been rough for you, and from what Shane’s told me about you— this isn’t you. So, I need you to be okay for Shane’s sake.”

I was left shocked, of all the things for Shane's ex-boyfriend of a week to say, I wasn’t expecting that.

My slacked jaw must have said as much. Jordan looked amused, and he simply took a sip of his coffee, patiently waiting for me to say something.

“I, uh, wow. Okay. To be honest I don't know how to react to all of this”

Jordan shrugged. “When you and your girlfriend broke up, how long did it take for you to get over it?”

I thought it over. “I think I was more angry about the cheating than the breakup.”

“Fair. And how long did it take to get over not having Shane in your life?”

I winced, that question hitting me like a punch to the gut. “I never got over it.”

Jordan lips curled into a knowing smile. “Shane and I were just using each other to distract ourselves from what we were missing. I want Shane to be happy, which brings the topic of you.”

I cringed, but there was something about Jordan that had the words spilling out of my mouth.

“I'm just not happy.” The revelation shouldn't have been new to me, but saying the words out loud made my eyes burn.

“Not happy with…”

I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “My life… me.”

Jordan returned his hand to my wrist but that time, it was oddly comforting. “Are they one and the same? I mean— is it because of you, that you hate your life. Or is it your life that makes you hate you.”

I mulled over his words. “I didn't used to hate me. I had a couple insecurities, but I liked who I was. I was happy and bubbly. I thought people liked me, and it was just—easy. Now I feel like I got a reality check. My friends kept things from me and though I’m thrilled that they’ve found themselves, I wish they’d told me. I can't be happy and bubbly at work—they all look at me like I’m just some immature kid . So, I had to become this fancy corporate man like my dad and I didn't think it would take such a toll on me…”

I knew I was rambling, and I wasn't at all sure if Jordan was following what I was saying. Though when he didn’t protest, I continued.

“And now, with Shane… I didn’t know it but this is the life I want—with him . But you're right, I don't know if I can make him happy. All these feelings… they’re so new. He said I might be demisexual and I think he may be right. And I’m so confused as to what it means for my life, because I have a life in Boston—that I hate. I feel like all I do is disappoint people and it makes me lose who I am. And now I am out of college I am learning these things about me and—”

There was a squeeze on my forearm. “That's a lot, take a breath.”

I did as he asked, inhaling deeply.

“Good. Now forget Shane for a second. I know I said I want you to be together, and I do. But you need to be happy first. I think you need to figure out who you are again. You might be the same guy as before but a new and improved version. What happened sucks but think of it this way; you have to have a few bad games to learn from them, and then you can feel the high of a win.”

I felt the tug of a smile and knowing he was on the right track, he continued. “So, first things first, your job—you hate it. It turns you into someone you're not, so I think you may need to consider finding something else you love doing.”

“Shane said the same thing. But I only love two things: Shane and hockey.”

Jordan smiled broadly. “What about coaching? As far as I know there is no room on Shane's team, but you are in hockey country. Surely there’s something here for you.”

I worried my lip, considering what he was saying.

“I'm going to leave it here. I can see I’ve planted the seed. Stop living your life to please others. Find what you love, and maybe along the way you will find some happiness.”

With a pat on my forearm, he stood.

“Thanks ,Jordan.”

“No thanks needed. You have a good one in Shane. Hopefully one day we can all be friends.” With that, he left, and I had a whole lot more to think about.

I opened my computer, pulling up a blank browser window and getting to work.