Chapter 15

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

T he responsibility placed on my shoulders is immense. I wiggle to find a comfortable spot on the couch. Propped up by cloud-soft pillows, my eyes caress the lines of the books written by a distant relative.

The irony of the throwaway being the savior isn't lost on me. Keepers are meant to bring prosperity and defend us from the darkness encroaching on our race. We're a part of life's checks and balances.

"Find anything useful?" Kirk asks.

My current babysitter of the day is seated across from me on the couch, flipping through the other book I'd brought home. I don't mind Kirk. The soft-spoken man with the delicious tenor is content to exist without pushing for more. His presence is soothing.

"More informative," I say.

"Hmmm. The spell I'm looking at is complicated." I look up and find his dark brows drawn together.

"What does it do?" I ask, genuinely interested. My concern allows him burrow past my defenses.

There's something special about this man.

"That's the problem, it doesn't say. I know it's an initiation for Fenrir's children, but what that means exactly is vague," he says.

I frown.

"Wouldn't be very secretive if they spelled it out." He winks.

I snicker. "I suppose that's true. Makes me wary to use it."

"Let me see it." I set my book aside on the side table, and hold out my hand.

He stands and I admire the flex of his muscles under the black henley. The sun streaming through the window makes his mocha skin glow. Kirk has the build of a boxer.

I can't help but wonder what's under those layers of clothing. Even the jeans mold to his thick thighs.

A tingle in my belly has me rerouting my thoughts. I take the book and look down.

"Oh." The rainbow-colored aura enchants me.

"What?" Kirk studies me with a curious stare.

"There's latent power here." I run my finger over the glowing greenish-blue triangle in the cover.

"I think those are symbols meant for Fenrir's blood only. A way for us to determine if it's a legitimate copy, maybe?"

"Well, that's smart," Kirk says.

"I think we'd be safe to do this."

"Even if we don't know how it affects you." His brow furrows. "I'm not a fan of taking risks with precious things."

Memories of the dream of desolation the shinning sword aiming for my neck, flooded my senses.

"Yes. We don't have time for hesitation."

"Okay. I can get my hands on most of the ingredients for the ritual, but there are some I need to forage."

"Field trip?" I perk up eager to leave the house and rest my eyes after hours of intense research.

"Yes." He pauses. "But it's conditional."

"Why?"

"Because it affects more than just me."

I want to uncover his secrets and help him carry the burden weighing so heavily on him.

I arch an eyebrow, intrigued. What secrets is the quiet man holding on to? "I'm listening."

"I have my sources."

"What's that mean, Kirk?" I'm sick of being left in the dark about him.

"There are places I gather rare herbs. My silence is part of the trade."

"What are you trading them?" Is he about to shatter the straight-laced by the book view I hold of him?

"Services. I treat them and they help me acquire what I need."

"I thought you no longer practiced."

"Not for the Alpha or in an official capacity."

His bitter tone surprises me. There's bad blood here.

"But I'll always help those in need."

"Why stop at all then?" I press, fishing for more information.

He rubs the back of his neck, and shots me a knowing look. "Losing the Alpha's mate was a hard blow to everyone. I spent every spare moment I had trying to figure out the disease."

"And." I push for more information embarrassed at being caught digging, but afraid he'll stop talking if I back off.

"It didn't make any sense." He shakes his head. "I knew it wasn't a medical issue. There's nothing that links the victims other than the fact they're female. They hadn't come into contact with any one thing that could transfer it. They also didn't share any particular DNA markers. History often repeats itself, so I looked to our past." There's a vacancy in his eyes as he recalls.

Excitement rises in my chest. "You found something,"

"Maybe." He presses his lips together. "This isn't the first time something like this has occurred."

"What? I've never heard about it."

"And you won't. The book was buried deep in the medical archives. I think the previous pack Healer hid it to keep it from being destroyed. The healer who wrote about it was just as perplexed as we are now. He came up with the theory that this was a sign of the old gods' anger."

I blink several times, eyes widened as I take everything in. The words spill like water overtaking a broken damn. How long has he held on to this?

"We've gotten so far away from our origins that we forget that we are magical beings spiritually connected to things far greater than ourselves that we don't fully understand."

"How did he end the spread?"

"I don't know."

The torment in his voice rips at my soul.

"What?"

"The pages were missing." Kirk's eyes fill with anger, darkening to almost black. "I searched every inch of the library trying to find an answer."

"Shit," I whisper.

"I brought it to the Alpha's attention and he exploded. Words were said, and threats were made. I removed myself from the situation and refused to return to work for a man who could be blinded by his ego."

"What?" It clicks. "He knew and he did nothing?" A cold sick feeling settles in my gut.

"A mate is meant to balance us out. Especially in someone like Alpha. He has a lot of power, literally and politically. Without someone to challenge his decisions and smooth out his rough edges, I think he's spiraling."

"And no one notices?" I clench my fist.

"What would they say? Short of being prepared to challenge, there's not much to be done. No one matches him in power levels. I've checked."

"This isn't good." My stomach gurgles in protest. Nauseous, I choke down the abundance of saliva gathering in my mouth.

"No. That's why this is so important," He taps the book. "It gives us hope."

"What happens if nothing changes, Kirk?"

He grows quiet.

"Kirk." I place a hand on his knee. I squeeze and he looks up.

"We'll lose more women and eventually we'll fade into obscurity."

"How long do we have?" This is more dire than Alpha had let on. Hearing our leader has been lying and sketchy has me in a mental tailspin.

"Before it's irreversible?" he asks.

"Yes." I swallow, afraid to hear his answer.

"It depends on the rate the sickness spreads. But no more than fifty years. We need a new pack with members, born or acquired."

"Alpha has always been against bringing new people into the fold." Would he send us to extinction for his pride?

"And if he doesn't change his opinions, or find the cure it'll lead to our end."

"How can he have his head so far up his ass?" I ask, revulsion burning the back of my throat.

"You understand why I've withdrawn."

They shunned him and painted him out to be an abnormality. A man who fell under the heavy weight of caring for our people. I'm pissed off for him.

"He can't get away with this." My hand slams the cushion beside me, driven by the force of my anger.

"If we don't come up with something else, we'll have no choice."

I close the book and stand. "Then we should get to work on this ritual."

The corners of his lips curve upward and I see the weight on his shoulders lighten as something in him loosens. His face is less pinched.

Kirk's demeanor makes more sense. He'd been carrying the secret of our inevitable demise.

"I don't want to leave them." The desire to have them within reach at all times is intense.

"Bring them with us," Kirk says

"Agreed." I gather the books, and place them in a leather satchel.

"It's going to be a bit of a hike. I suggest you wear the proper shoes.

"Where the hell are you taking me, Doctor?"

He laughs. "Into the woods. Where else? I'm going to pack some things for us."

I finish getting ready while he stocks a backpack before joining me at the front door, and we head out.

An hour later, we pull onto an overgrown path and park.

"You realize this is the beginning of several horror movies, right?" Taking in the forest, I press against the car windows and doors, like the trees are trying to swallow us whole.

Kirk chuckles. "It's not a secret if it's easy to access."

"Are you going to tell me where we're headed?"

"Up the mountain."

Where does Fells' family live? Will I finally get a chance to see what he left town for? Because I'm not buying his data collection, history keeper bullshit.

"Why the cloak and dagger routine?" Learning more will help me better understand Fell's motivations. Fenrir knows I need the closure.

"These people have a different way of thinking. It's not always welcome in town, and they prefer to keep a low profile for safety reasons."

I narrow my eyes at his vagueness.

"I feel like there's a whole story behind that statement." He lifts his head and the sun kisses his golden brown skin, highlighting his strong jawline. He's a modern-day knight protecting the villagers.

"There is, but it's not mine to share." I admire his integrity.

It sets him apart. He pushes his door open. "The sooner we get going the better."

Stepping out, we gathering our things, he slips on his backpack, and we set out.

"Ready?" he asks.

To learn more about you, Healer? Yes.

I adjust the satchel. "Let's cut through this thicket."

He laughs and we set off. It's been a long time since I got outside like this. Senior year had been lot of projects, and cramming. I savor the rich aromas of the earth, the sharp tang of the pines, and the pungent scent of the turning leaves.

Mother Nature's artistic display soothes my soul. I find calm amidst the chaos as we continue our hike.

"How was life outside of the pack?"

I'm shocked he bothered to ask. Everyone acts like there's no life outside of our town.

"Refreshing. I made the choices I wanted to without thinking about anyone else, and I didn't stand out. In Tennessee, there was a place and person for every interest or activity. We lack that here and I think it's driving people away."

"I agree. The pack could stand for some serious revamping." He flashes me a bright toothy smile that makes my body tingle.

He continues to impress me. "That's not what I expected you to say."

"There are plenty more liberal-thinking people scattered among us. We just keep our thoughts to ourselves because the climate doesn't appreciate them."

"But you know we need change," I protest.

"Yes, but the Alpha isn't ready to hear that yet." The joy leaves his face. "And you wouldn't like his methods for showing his displeasure. I think after six hundred years he's lost some of his humanity."

"Do you think it's possible for him to set his prejudice aside to save us?"

"I don't know." He winces.

We drift into a comfortable silence. I step over a thick root. He holds a branch back for me and I smile, and we continue up the mountain. After an hour, the sounds of others begins.

The brush moves around us, and a man appears. He's wearing camo trying to blend into his surroundings. A dark scowl lines his thin lips. I tense. Is he a friend or foe?

"Doc?" Camo man's facial expressions morphs into something friendly.

"Hey, Taylor. I brought a friend with me."

I wave my fingers.

"Come on I'll lead you back." He releases a strange whistle.

The brush comes to life, leaves and branches separate to reveal a previously invisible village. What the hell? How had they managed to keep this place a secret?

I rub my eyes wondering if this is some sort of heat induced mirage. When the sight remains the same, I seek out the wards, trying to gather more information. They push back at my examination. Properly scolded, I turn my attention to the wood buildings are lined up on the left and right, and further back there are cabins.

"Wow," I whisper.

"We've come a long way in the past fifty years or so," Taylor grins. His chest swells, and he nods.

"You've been here that long?" I ask, amazed. This goes against everything preached to us growing up. Not only are they disconnected from the pack, they're thriving.

What has gone on under my nose? Had my feelings of rejection blinded me to things going on in the pack?

"When you demand change and it doesn't happen, it's up to you to make the life you want to live."

"I like that." I smile and Taylor winks.

"We've been trying to get Doc up here for ages. Maybe you can help us convince him." Taylor gestures at Kirk. "Are you here to see Maggie?"

"Yes, is she in her apothecary?"

"Should be. I have to ask why we should allow you to bring a stranger in. You know the rules." His eyes darken, and his spine straightens.

"She's my mate." Kirk steps in front of me. "We're bonded. What I know, she knows."

Taylor's eyes bulge. "When did this happen? Why didn't you send word?"

"Days ago, per Alpha's orders. It took us all by surprise."

Taylor's lips flatten into a thin line and he grunts. "We've warned you about him?—."

Kirk holds up a hand. "I know."

Taylor looks away. "You're responsible for her actions then. Think about what we've said." He focuses on me. "I'll see you around. Nice to meet you."

We head to a small building with the word Apothecary scrawled across it in black cursive.

We step inside, and the bell above the door rings. Greeted by the smell of fresh herbs, my eyes are assaulted by glass jars, books, and hand handmade goods.

A tall slender woman with ebony skin, and black hair peppered with gray that frames her round face stands behind a counter.

She greets us with a kind smile. "Doc what brings you here?"

"I need a few hard to come by ingredients. Dittany of Crete and Hellebore."

Maggie's eyes widen. "Those are powerful herbs."

"It's for a big spell."

"I didn't know you dabbled in magic, Doc," Maggie observes him intensely.

"Need, must, and all that." Kirk meets her stare.

"Hmmm." She looks at me. "You haven't introduced your friend."

"This is Ylva Eskildson, my mate."

Maggie's mouth forms an o. "The time must be nearing."

I turn to Kirk who shrugs.

Running her fingers over the bottles on the shelf behind her, Maggie hums. She chooses two, and places them on the counter in front of us.

"How much?" she asks.

"Eight ounces of both should do it."

Maggie measures the herbs out on the scales, and stores them in glass bottles.

"What did you mean earlier?" I pierce Kirk with a stare when he accepts the bag.

"Let's take a walk while your young man does his rounds."

I meet Kirk's gaze, and he nods his approval.

"Okay."

"It was time for my lunch break anyway." She slips her open sign to closed and leads us out of the shop.

"I usually check in to see if anyone needs treatment or advice."

"Go." I can see his conflict. I won't stand between him and those in need.

He pauses. "Are you sure?"

The nervousness is adorable. It doesn't fit his usual calm demeanor.

"Positive. I'll be fine."

"I assure you her safety," Maggie says.

"Alright. I'll go to the infirmary." He steps back, and pauses, hesitating.

Maggie smiles. "Well, that's a change of pace for the Doc. I can see you'll be good for him."

I snicker. "Are you a seer?"

"My family has a touch of the sight. I know who you are; one of Fenrir's children."

I'm not surprised she knows given the powerful aura surrounding her. "I'm glad someone did."

"It's a rumor most have forgotten about."

"But not you?" I study her.

"We've been waiting for change, you represent that."

"I wouldn't be so sure." We continue to walk through the town. She waves at others and exchanges greetings.

"You lost your family young, so a sense of community and belonging must be all new to you."

"Yes. I was brought home against my will and had this dumped into my lap." Unable to resist her maternal lure, I speak honestly.

Her salt and paper brows arch high. "Explain?" The indignation on my behalf feels good.

She listens as I relay my past week. The anger flashing in her dark brown eyes reassures, loosening the tight muscles in my neck.

"I'm sorry you had to experience that. Desperate people make poor, ignorant choices."

Stern, yet compassionate, she reminds me of my mother. We come to a stop at a small shed-like building.

"I want to show you something." She steps forward, unlatches the door and pulls it open. "Not all of us have forgotten the wolf king we believe we descended from."

Votive candles in red candle holders are placed to the left and right of him. The light illuminates the building. Inside I inhale the lingering scent of Palo Santo. I'm dazzled by a three-foot silver statue of the great wolf on an altar.

Offerings of herbs and berries rest in an offering basket on the floor.

"We've prayed for change and assistance for years," Maggie admits.

"This space feels like home."

"It might feel like you're alone, but you aren't. Alpha seeks to control you, but what you represent is far greater than him." Maggie places a hand on my shoulder. "That scares him. He's forgotten his job is to be the figurehead, not a dictator who bends us all to his will by any means necessary. He stopped listening to what the people wanted when his mate died."

I smell the truth in her words. Her heart beat remains steady and she meets my gaze head on.

"What do I do?"

"Answer the great wolf's call. Step into who you are and stand firm." A triangle etched into the tall wood of the altar. I trace a finger along the outline My body erupts into goosebumps.

"What's this?"

"That's a sign of Fenrir's blessing. You've seen it before."

A spiderweb light caress runs down my sternum. Nodding I pull off my flannel button-up and shove up the sleeve of my t-shirt to reveal my tattoo.

"It's a sign that you're one of his."

"Do you have more about him?"

"Yes, I'll send you home with one of our old books. Come, let's grab them from my cabin."

A gentle breeze tugs at my braid as we leave the sacred space. I'm on the right path. Navigating back through town, I freeze when I spot a familiar head of dark blonde hair and a heart-shaped face.

"Kar?" the young girl turns. She bears a strong resemblance to Fell. Fear fills her brown eyes and she bolts. I chase her for a few yards, and stop.

Who knows what Fell told her about me? My stomach churns. Once upon a time, Kar was like family. Am I seeing what I wanted to? Maybe it hadn't been her after all.

"Come. Your doctor will be finished soon."

"Right."

There are far more important things to worry about. Reluctantly, I allow her to lead me away.

What are you and your family hiding, Fell?