Chapter 2 - Freya

Chapter 2

Freya

After Moonblessed escorted us back from the wildlands, I wasn’t sure what I’d expected, but this wasn’t it. Gage had gone off to debrief the Moonblessed alpha pair, and now he put more distance between us instead of sticking close.

Did he blame me for their scars?

I was still processing all that had happened only yesterday… and I felt desperate to learn more, to find out somehow if I’d lost my magic.

“You okay?” Flint asked as I watched the door of our den close behind Gage.

Was I okay? I felt overwhelmed by everything, angry that my only living relative had tried to use and discard me, and scared of the magic I’d unleashed without a thought.

Not to mention the fact that I had told none of them about my visions.

“No,” I answered honestly, but I began disrobing right there on the street. “Let’s go for a run.”

In the Moonblessed pack, shifters often traveled in various states of undress as they returned from a run in wolf form or left for one. The packlands within their walls had grown crowded, with new houses edging closer to the borders every day, so sometimes wolves ran outside the walls in the wildlands.

It felt good to spend one moment stuffing all my clothes in my sling bag — the one Flint had made for me — and turn into a wolf the next. At last, I felt like a true wolf shifter. Like I truly belonged with my pack. Soon I stood in the shadow of two large alpha wolves, with the moonmarked brownish wolf to my left and the even larger pitch-black wolf to my right.

“By the way…” Flint said as we started off at a trot. “Did you drink your contraceptive brew today?”

“Of course,” I answered.

We all knew my heat would arrive eventually, and the last thing I wanted to worry about was the chance of getting pregnant.

Rowan, of course, said nothing. He’d been quiet ever since the battle. I couldn’t blame him when he’d been hit by witchfire for the second time in his life. I’d heard that it still burned for ages, and even wolf shifter healing couldn’t completely heal the scars.

Witchfire from yesterday’s battle had singed Rowan’s tail, burning off the fur along the underside, leaving the skin painful and red. Flint’s paws and chest had been badly burned when he’d tried to leap over the witchfire they’d imprisoned him in, and his paws still looked naked and red without their fur.

I winced internally, thinking about how much pain they might still be in. At least my mates would heal faster in wolf form. Hopefully, their fur would eventually regrow.

As we took off for one of the wall’s gates, Flint warned, “We need to stick close to the walls, or only venture toward Brielle’s.”

Flint’s words took a moment to register.

“Yes! We should go to Brielle’s,” I said, surprised I hadn’t thought of it earlier. “She can tell me if my magic is gone or not.”

“Then let’s run to her place,” Flint suggested.

“First, let’s stop by and see if Shante wants to come with,” I said.

Shante answered the door to see three wolves on her doorstep. She smiled down at us and said, “Let me grab my sling bag.”

I didn’t even have to switch back to human form to ask if she wanted to come. She was game. I let my tongue loll out in a wolfish smile as soon as she stepped outside.

“I’m glad you’re feeling up for a run,” she added. “When the warriors came back and I heard what had happened…”

She shook her head and began stuffing her clothing into her sling bag. My heart warmed at my friendship with her, even though the sight of her naked body had my hackles rising.

Flint and Rowan wisely turned their backs as Shante chuckled and locked her door.

“Don’t mind me, jealous girl,” she scolded me. “I’m no mate thief.”

We didn’t fully understand why I was cursed to have a second heat right on the heels of the first. Since no one had ever heard of a wolf having two heats out of season, I assumed it had something to do with my Odinswolf nature.

As soon as Shante slipped the key into her sling bag, she shifted into wolf form and nipped at my side. I chuffed a laugh and danced away, then broke into an all-out run toward the wall.

“Run with us!” I called back to Shante.

Since Shante belonged to the Moonblessed pack, she didn’t share a pack bond with us, and since she wasn’t an alpha, she couldn’t project her thoughts to us. I wasn’t an alpha, either, but I could project my voice like one. Unfortunately, that meant our communication with her would be one-sided during our run, but we made do.

As we ran, my thoughts chased themselves. The ball of lightning that had absorbed my aunt’s spell and killed her hadn’t come from my witch side. From the first time my Odinswolf made her appearance known, lightning had always crackled through my fur, even before my aunt’s coven had broken the curse sealing my magic away.

Not anymore. The lightning had been gone ever since then, and it made me wonder if it was gone for good or… if it needed to recharge. Maybe Brielle would know, even though it wasn’t witch magic.

After everything that had happened, being able to run between two of my mates with my friend at my back soothed me. My wolf remained wary as we traveled, and my human side still worried about everything… my visions, my mates’ injuries, the way my magic had exploded like a bomb, killing my father’s sister. But for the first time since the battle, I felt hope that everything would eventually work out.

Once outside the wall, I led the way down a path that was becoming more familiar to me. Shante yipped and came up beside me, her head tilted and her ears turned toward me in a questioning way.

“Yes, we’re going to Brielle’s.”

Shante jumped in front of me, then shifted back. “Well, why didn’t you say so? Let me give her a heads up. It’s not good to sneak up on a mage, you know.”

My mates and I looked away as Shante stood naked in the middle of the forest without shame. She sent off a text, then patted me on the head.

“Okay, let’s go.”

As soon as Shante shifted back into wolf form, I nipped at her side and danced away before she could get me back. She took off down the path toward Brielle’s, and I gave a yip of excitement and followed. It felt good to feel so free after everything that had happened.

Even better to hear Flint’s laughter through the pack bond as he and Rowan trailed us. Their longer alpha gaits meant they could have caught up to us easily, but they stayed vigilant, their muzzles lifted as they searched the wildlands for any threatening scents.

“If you raise your muzzle while you run and slightly open your mouth, you’ll catch more scents,” Flint advised me privately through the pack bond.

I tried it, and my heart filled with joy as I discovered he was right. My mates wanted to help me catch up on what I’d missed out on for the past decade. Most wolf shifters experienced their first shift between the ages of thirteen and nineteen. Apparently Odinswolves didn’t shift until the full moon after their twenty-fifth birthdays. I didn’t know when my actual birthday was, but we’d decided to call it October 30, since my first shift occurred on the full moon after that.

“What else?” I asked through the pack bond. “Come on, Rowan, what do you have for me?”

The big, imposing wolf was staring at my backside when I turned to face him.

“Like what you see?” I flirted.

“Challenge him to another chase and find out,” Flint laughed when Rowan didn’t immediately answer.

“Sprinting is fast.” Rowan’s voice in the pack bond sounded much less scratchy and disused compared to his human form, but the low timbre always aroused me in any form. “But for covering long distances, trotting is better to conserve energy balanced against speed.”

“Good to know,” I answered, glad Rowan hadn’t shut me out completely.

I wasn’t exactly sure what was bothering him. Talking to Gage would surely resolve whatever awkwardness still remained between him and me — if our pack alpha ever made time to talk to me. But Rowan was like a wild animal. I felt like I needed to keep petting him if I hoped to tame him.

Rowan hated my witch half. As we ran toward Brielle’s, I wondered what would happen if it turned out all my magic was gone. Would that defeat his last remaining reason against being my mate? And if so, would it be worth it? My heart fell at the thought of spending the rest of my life knowing I’d been capable of magic, but never consciously able to use it, not even once.

I also hadn’t had any more visions — another thing I should probably ask Brielle about. Privately, of course.

As if the battle hadn’t been scary enough, the visions afterward shook me to my core. It felt like the fate of our pack rested on my shoulders — and I wasn’t ready. I had just learned to shift, and, if I had any magic left, I didn’t know how to use it.

One thing I knew for sure — I had to convince my mates to come away with me during my heat in order to prevent the terrible things I’d foreseen. Hundreds upon hundreds of wolf shifter bodies, both from Ironwood and Frost Fang.

From my visions, I knew that Ironwood must have attacked during my heat, when we were all distracted and unable to help. And I knew how to prevent that future. I felt certain of it. But if I mentioned the vision to my mates, would it destroy our chances for the less bloody outcome I sought?

This time when we approached Brielle’s wildlands cottage, I shifted back early. Shante shifted alongside me until I said quietly, “I’d like to go in alone this time.”

Shante’s expression fell, and I felt bad for denying my friend, but I also hoped she would understand. She searched my eyes for a moment, as if wondering how she’d let me down. Then she awkwardly patted me on the shoulder.

“Last time was wolf business. This time is mage business. I get it. I’ll give you your privacy.”

I smiled and got dressed. “Thanks for understanding.”

Shante smiled, her eyes sad and worried. She had known I was part witch after she’d met me, probably from noticing how similar my scent was to Brielle’s. Wolf shifters could smell magic, but I couldn’t be sure whether they confused my Odinswolf magic for my witchy magic. Brielle would know, though.

“Don’t keep me waiting!” Brielle called from inside the house.

I took one look at Shante staying behind with my mates, and I couldn’t help but bare my very human teeth.

Shante laughed. “I’ll be over there.” She pointed back down the trail. “When you’re done, come get me.”

Then she shifted back and bounded down the trail back the way we’d come. Meanwhile Flint took up a guard position outside the cottage. Rowan began circling it, presumably to check the perimeter. They always took my safety very seriously in the wildlands.

With a deep breath, I stepped across the threshold and into the mage’s den.

“Thanks for agreeing to see me on such short notice,” I said politely, but when I came into the kitchen, Brielle wasn’t there.

“Not like you gave me much of a choice!” she yelled from around the corner.

The mismatched kitchen appliances and overly ordinary wooden table and chairs might have lulled someone else into a sense of comfort, but not me. I didn’t dare step foot beyond where she’d previously allowed. Who knew what kind of protective spells Brielle might have put up around the place?

“Sorry… At least Shante remembered to give you a heads up.”

“I know you probably don’t think I have much of a life out here in the wildlands,” Brielle grumbled, still out of sight. “But living alone out here requires… effort.”

She grunted as she did something, and I heard a startling thump as a blast of power washed over me.

At last, Brielle came around the corner, dusting her hands off, though not a speck of dust dared cling to her. This time she wore jeans, and her tightly braided red hair showed a busy woman at work. I didn’t miss the way her green eyes lit up when she looked at me.

“My dear, you broke the curse!”

“Ah, well…”

I nervously twisted my hair around a finger as I recounted the story of how we’d been on a pack run in the wildlands when Pandora’s coven ambushed us.

Brielle’s bushy eyebrows rose in shock and fell in horror and anguish as I recounted watching my mates get injured while I stood by helplessly… until I had finally remembered that Pandora didn’t know I could shift.

Once or twice before, I thought I’d only imagined lightning sparking in Brielle’s eyes, but now I knew I wasn’t imagining it. Today, a full storm brewed in the mage’s gaze.

“Your father’s sister? The one you told me about before?”

I nodded my head.

“If I’d known they were here… so close…”

She growled, reminding me that although I always thought of her as more of a mage, she was every bit the hybrid I was.

“The good news is that I think they broke the curse. But I’m not sure about my magic…” I trailed off.

“They must have broken it, however…” Brielle drew a sigil in the air between us, and I flinched.

She paused, finger in the air. “Sorry, my dear. You’ve been through a lot. This won’t hurt a bit, I promise.”

I nodded, and she continued. Then she tilted her head.

“The curse is indeed gone…” she mused. “But your magic… looks… unnatural. Like it doesn’t exactly belong to you. Like it’s more powerful than it should be.”

I told her about how my aunt’s spell had refracted off of my Odinswolf magic. I described the way it seemed to devour her spell before slamming into my aunt and killing her, meanwhile throwing the rest of us back.

Brielle nodded as if that made sense. “Perhaps some of this magic swirling within you isn’t yours. You may have absorbed your aunt’s magic. Maybe even some of the coven’s magic.” She gave me a vicious grin. “They tried to steal your magic, and instead, they may have strengthened you.”

“Will you train me?” I asked, eyes wide.

“I will. But not today. I have,” she gestured over her shoulder as though I knew what she’d been doing back there, “things to do. And maybe we should let that,” she gestured vaguely to my… aura? “Ummm… settle. The curse has only been broken for a day?”

“Right…” I frowned. “Less than that.”

That wasn’t the answer I’d been hoping for, but at least Brielle hadn’t outright turned me down. It was great to know that my magic wasn’t gone, and that, in fact, it might even be stronger than expected. I was so new to all of this, I didn’t even know how to sense my own magic, or how to harness it. And after yesterday… magic seemed more terrifying than ever.

I remembered feeling something cracking inside of me. At the time, I’d feared it was magic being ripped away from me. Now I assumed it was the curse breaking.

“My Odinswolf lightning is gone,” I whispered, fear lodging in my throat. I swallowed it down. “Do you think…”

“That your wolf is tired after saving your asses yesterday?” Brielle nodded. “I don’t know how your Odinswolf magic works, but for us mages, magic isn’t endless, you know. There’s a cost to using it, and you may have overexerted yourself.”

I nodded, feeling reassured but mostly numb. So many conflicting worries hollowed me out, making me simultaneously tired and restless. I gathered my courage to ask the most important question of all.

“There’s one other thing…” I glanced at the table. “Do you have time?”

Brielle sighed, then motioned for me to sit down. “Only a few minutes. You can come back tomorrow afternoon if you’d like.”

“No, no, I think this will be fast… After the battle, I felt something move. Like… the world felt like it moved around me. And then I had a vision. Well, three visions, actually.”

“Visions?” Brielle’s bushy eyebrows shot up once more before her eyes narrowed. “Our magic deals with the physical, natural world. Some types of fae are clairvoyant, from what I’ve heard, but…” She shook her head.

“Hank of the Bloody Dawn pack told me it might be an Odinswolf power.”

Brielle nodded. “I would have to agree.”

“So… Do you think telling others about the visions might mess things up?”

Brielle shook her head. “I can’t be sure. But if you’re concerned about that… I’d suggest you trust your instincts. Your wolf is part of you. And if she’s an Odinswolf, then… she might instinctively know how best to use her power.”

I nodded, then got up from the table. “Thanks, Brielle, for everything. I’ll leave you to it.”

She nodded and smiled. “I’m looking forward to seeing you back here tomorrow, my young pupil.”

I laughed. “Don’t let it go to your head or anything.”

Brielle paused, then fixed her gaze on me. “Be careful not to try practicing magic on Moonblessed packlands. Some wolf shifters don’t take kindly to magic.”

“I wouldn’t dream of trying anything without your guidance,” I assured her.

Brielle made a scoffing sound and then shooed me outside. Flint’s ears flicked forward, his golden eyes on me.

“Brielle said if I come back tomorrow, she’ll teach me some magic!” I exclaimed, throwing my arms around the massive wolf’s neck.

Then I shifted back and told him that she was too busy to help me today as we trotted off toward Shante. I didn’t see Rowan anywhere, but I knew he would simply follow my scent when he was ready.

Still, my wolf wanted all her mates close by. She hated the distance to Heath. Gage’s kiss had pleased her, but she still longed for his presence. And now, Rowan’s disappearance rankled.

As for my magic, Brielle’s brush-off disappointed me, even though I tried not to let it bother me. I’d spent my entire life without magic, and now that I had it, I wanted to learn to use it. Waiting another day felt unbearable.

Though I supposed it was the same with my wolf.

“I should have had my wolf a decade ago,” I muttered through the pack bond. “I’ve got a lot of time to make up for.”

“Then it’s time for training,” Flint said softly through the pack bond.

He was right, but my other two mates had sensed my disappointment and sadness through the pack bond. Gage’s guilt came through in response, sharp and brittle. Somehow, he thought he was to blame for my sadness. And since we still had only a one-way mate bond, he couldn’t ask to be sure.

But Heath could.

“What’s happened?” he broke into my thoughts. “What’s got you down, my little warrior wolf?”

“Do you want the good news or the bad news first?” I asked, remembering when Heath broke the news to me about why he planned to stay behind in Elder Forest.

He sighed across our mental bond, a bond stronger than the pack bond. Through the mate bond, Heath could tell I was in no immediate danger, just as I could tell he was still in human form inside a vehicle.

“Bad news.”

I chuckled, because telling him the bad news would give away the good news. “Brielle doesn’t have time to train me today. I kind of sprang a visit on her. Luckily Shante thought to text ahead and give her a heads up, but she was busy anyway.”

“Brielle won’t…” Heath murmured. “Does this mean what I think it means?”

He could probably sense my grin, even though I was in wolf form. “Yes! That’s the good news… Brielle confirmed I have magic.”

I didn’t mention the part about how she couldn’t be sure it was my magic. Or what we’d discussed about my visions. For now, I needed to keep that confidential. I wasn’t sure why it mattered, but I planned to follow my instincts.

“That’s not good news,” Heath groaned.

“What? What do you mean?”

“It’s GREAT news!”

I laughed. “Now tell me… are you on your way here to Moonblessed?”

Heath’s wince was so strong, I could feel it through the bond. “Gage just called and told me to go ahead on to Frost Fang. I’ll meet you when you all come back.”

Part of me had known we wouldn’t stay in Moonblessed long, but that was before I knew I had magic… before I realized Brielle could help train me. Before I could protest, Heath continued.

“The plan is for me to surprise anyone else who might make a move while Gage is gone.” He pursed his lips as he added. “You’ll have the next few days to work things out with Gage on your own, little wolf.”

Heath couldn’t hide the undercurrent of worry beneath his words. I knew that was part of the reason he’d been okay with staying behind in Elder Forest.

He’d always loved Gage, but kept it to himself. After confessing it to me — the mate they both shared — Heath wasn’t sure what to do. He seemed scared to see Gage again, or maybe scared to see me and Gage interacting together, knowing that he could have my love but maybe not Gage’s.

“Do you want me to… bring this up to Gage? Feel him out for you? I could tell him if it would—”

“What?” Heath yelped. “NO. Freya, that’s honestly the last thing I want.”

“I know you’re worried he—”

“If anyone tells Gage, it’ll be me,” Heath growled. “And that’s a big if.”

I sighed.

“Heath, you know he cares—”

“Of course he cares about me. I’m his best friend. His childhood friend. He’s known me longer than anyone else alive. But he doesn’t see me that way.”

“How do you know unless—”

“Freya,” he growled again.

Heat flooded my wolf’s body. She liked it just as much as I did when her mates growled. But hearing him growl my name really did it for me.

“Don’t tease a girl who’s close to her second heat,” I warned with a chuckle. Then I got serious. “I won’t tell him anything. That’s on you. But I think you should.”

“He’s not interested in men, little wolf,” Heath’s broken voice made my wolf whimper.

“What is it, moonbeam?” Flint asked beside me.

“Sorry,” I murmured across the pack bond to both him and Rowan. “I’m talking to Heath and… I miss him.”

It was the truth, even if that wasn’t what had made me whimper.

“We’ll be reunited before you know it,” Flint swore.

“I know.”

“Heath?” I called out across the great distance, not wanting to let our connection fade.

“Yeah?”

“You’ll always have me,” I promised. “No matter what.”

The pure, unfiltered love that hit me across the mate bond threatened to knock me from my paws.

“I know.” The warmth of Heath’s love met me in the mate bond. “You’re all I need.”

I didn’t call him out on the lie.

Just as I needed all four of my mates, I sensed he needed Gage. Plus, I hated to feel Heath’s unhappiness when either of us brought up his name. Sooner or later, I wanted Heath to find out if his assumptions about Gage were correct. But it would have to wait.

I let the connection between us fade to its normal background level as I followed Shante back through a Moonblessed gate. She wove her way through the town, and I noticed her packmates raise their heads as we passed. From the way their wolves perked up and looked at one another, I knew they were communicating. I couldn’t hear their conversation over their pack bond, of course.

I took note of the physical tells and realized I’d need to do a better job hiding my mental conversation with Heath once we were reunited. We could stand in the same room and have a private conversation… in whichever form we chose. Today had proven I could be in wolf form and he could be in human form, and we could still talk over a great distance.

I looked forward to having the same with my other three mates. My wolf seized on my interest to push her own aims.

Yes, bite, claim , my wolf insisted, ever impatient.

Soon, I promised.

We spent the rest of the afternoon in a park inside the safety of Moonblessed walls after Rowan caught up to us. At first, Flint had me spar against Shante, who was more my size. From the sidelines, Flint called out suggestions to Shante on how to attack me. Rowan corrected my form, showing me how to be light on my feet to dodge an attack, how to dive and roll without getting hurt, and how to lunge in for the kill without leaving my neck too exposed.

Later, Shante switched back to human form and got dressed. Flint and I took up sparing, and I realized now why they’d had me start practicing with Shante first. Fighting off an alpha seemed impossible when they had a longer gait, longer reach, and more weight against my smaller form.

Shante stuck around a little while to call out suggestions to me, since this was the only way she could talk to me while I was in wolf form. Eventually, she called it a day, and I switched forms and got dressed as well so I could hug her and thank her.

“You’re the best friend I never knew I needed,” I whispered in Shante’s ear.

As I did so, a spike of sadness went through my heart. Willow had been my best friend until I was exiled. But, as the two lowest-ranked people in the pack, our friendship had been as much about survival as it had been about supporting each other. Rowan had gotten me out of there, and Gage had gotten Flint and Heath out… but my old friend remained trapped there, forced to do the bidding of any wolf of the pack, since she was still considered the omega, lowest ranked of all. I hoped someday Willow could escape Ironwood’s clutches as I had.

Shante squeezed me back. “Let me know if you want to do this again tomorrow.”

She walked off and waved, leaving me with a dizzying sense of belonging. Was this what it was supposed to feel like, being part of a larger pack? We could make plans for the next day and the next. We could run together whenever we wanted. Maybe tomorrow, I would invite her back to our den for dinner.

To my surprise, when I turned around, Flint was also back in human form. I hadn’t even heard him shift, and now he was putting on his moccasins.

When he straightened back up and saw the look on my face, Flint laughed. “I think that’s enough for your first official day of wolf training.”

“I am pretty tired,” I admitted.

Not just physically, but also emotionally. I felt beat up.

“How about a bath and a massage?” Flint asked, his gaze heating.

Behind him, I watched Rowan slink away, and my heart fell. Flint’s eyes followed his packmate, and then he took my hand. “Give him some time, love.”

I nodded, both to his question and his reassurance. Rowan had to come around in his own time. “Yes, I would love a bath and a massage.”

I let out a yelp of surprise as Flint scooped me up in his arms, cradling me against his chest. Moonblessed wolves stepped out of our way, and his powerful arms carried me all the way back to our den. As I gazed up into Flint’s face, I only fell deeper in love with him.

Heath was away, and things were strained with both Gage and Rowan, but Flint remained as steadfast as always. My heart expanded with love for him, and even though Flint and I didn’t share a mate bond yet, something gave me away. He smiled and put me down as soon as we crossed the threshold, but he didn’t let go. The alpha pulled me to him, and our lips crashed together in a kiss that felt like we’d been together for years, not months.

As our tongues chased one another, I reveled in the moment. Flint and I rarely had time alone together, and I wanted to enjoy every second.

“Let’s get you upstairs to your bath,” he growled, his impatience matching my own.

“Yes, alpha.”

I couldn’t wait to see what the evening might hold aside from a bath and a massage.