Chapter 24

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Ida Belle pulled up to the curb in front of a tidy cottage tucked at the end of a street in an older neighborhood and looked over at me. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“No. But I can’t come up with anything better.”

“I think it’s a great idea,” Gertie said.

“Of course you do,” Ida Belle said. “You’re not the one who’ll go to jail for it.”

“Fortune just pulled a rescue mission in a terrorist compound in Iran,” Gertie said. “How bad can jail in Houma be?”

“I’m not planning on going to jail,” I said. “I’m planning on scaring him so bad he does the right thing.”

“I’m all for it,” Ida Belle said, “but I wouldn’t be doing my job as backup if I didn’t ask.”

I grinned. “Well, Backup, let’s go threaten a medical examiner.”

We headed up the sidewalk and I knocked on the front door. Then I heard someone moving quietly inside, their footsteps stopping in front of the door. Most people wouldn’t have heard anything at all, but most people also weren’t former CIA assassins. I waited a couple seconds, but when no other movement was forthcoming, I assumed he’d looked out the peephole and known who I was, so therefore wasn’t about to answer the door.

“I know you’re standing on the other side of the door,” I said. “And I know you lied about Justin Barbet’s death because I’ve seen the autopsy. So you can either open this door and we can have a discussion like regular people, or I’ll take what I know to a federal prosecutor. Your choice.”

The door slowly opened and the medical examiner peered out, his eyes wide.

Five foot six. A hundred forty pounds. So little muscle tone that I wasn’t sure how he was standing without aid. Skin even whiter than Shadow Chaser’s—something I hadn’t thought was possible. Absolutely, positively no threat to anyone, anywhere, at any time, unless he was lying about an autopsy that left them on the hook for a death.

“I have to assume you know who I am,” I said.

“Bryce said you’re a meddling PI and that I wasn’t to speak to you.”

I raised an eyebrow. “I suppose he left out the part where I’m a former CIA agent.”

I didn’t think it was possible for him to get any whiter, but he still managed.

“He didn’t mention it,” he finally croaked.

“Of course he didn’t. Look, I don’t know what he’s promised you but trust me, it can’t be worse than going to prison for helping railroad a guy for manslaughter. I will buy Corndog and Petunia’s house for market price before I let Bryce and his disgusting friend get their hands on it.”

He blushed and I knew that he was well aware of what was going on.

“How much did he promise you?” I asked.

“Nothing. I swear. ”

“Then why would you do this to an old man and his wife? Why would you help kick them out of their home?”

“Because he said he’d fire me. This is probably the last place in Louisiana I can get a job. Trust me, I don’t like Bryce any more than anyone else does, but I have bills like everyone else.”

“But not a backbone. You know good and well Justin consumed food other than the fish, and you also know that mark on his back was a knee. This is murder. You’re deliberately hiding a murder so that Bryce can fleece seniors out of their home. No one on the planet will employ you when I blast that all over the country. So pick your poison.”

Sweat rolled down his forehead, and I wondered for a moment if we were going to have another death on our hands in his doorway. Finally, he swallowed and shook his head.

“To hell with Bryce,” he said. “He’s a horrible person. He planted drugs on the mayor’s son to get me this job and takes 25 percent of my pay for it. But I’m done. I don’t care if I have to be the receipt checker at Walmart. My hair has been falling out in handfuls, and I haven’t slept in three days. I’ll say I was sick and made a mistake and change it to a suspicious death. In fact, I’ll go down to the office and do it right now. Just please don’t kill me.”

“I’m not in the habit of killing people unless it’s government orders or to defend myself or others,” I said.

“But it happens,” Gertie said.

Simpson visibly swallowed. “You know what, I don’t even need to change my shoes. These Crocs will be fine. I’ll just grab my car keys.”

I smiled. “Cool. We’ll follow you to the office. We won’t come in, of course, but if things don’t go as we discussed, I’ll find you. Anywhere .”

He paled again and slammed the door. We headed back to the SUV and before we’d even climbed inside, his garage door opened, and his car backed out of the drive and took off. We followed him to the ME’s office and pulled over to the curb until he went inside.

“You want to wait for him to come out?” Ida Belle asked.

I shook my head. “He’s more scared of me than Bryce, and he looked to already be at heart attack level over this when we showed up. He can’t handle playing this out. He doesn’t have the backbone and likely has an ethic or two more than Bryce.”

“So are we headed back to the hotel?” Gertie asked.

I shrugged. “The friends are at the barbecue until probably midafternoon, so no point in going back there unless you want to sleep. I figured we could hit a couple of those antiques shops and maybe buy a few things, or at least take some pictures. It helps with the whole undercover thing.”

Gertie clapped her hands and bounced on the seat. Ida Belle sighed but started the SUV and headed off for the shops. I sent Carter a text that we’d gotten onto a line of inquiry and might be staying another night. I’d let him know later and to fill in all related parties. I got back a thumbs-up and figured we were covered in Sinful until further notice.

Then I rang Corndog.

“Has that guy contacted you again?” I asked.

“No. But the sheriff called and told us we still can’t rent the room and that he’s thinking about closing us down until his investigation is complete. He’s trying to ruin us.”

“He is,” I agreed. “But all of that is about to change. You can’t repeat any of this, but I found out that there was an autopsy, and Justin’s death was suspicious.”

“So it was murder?”

“Yes. So as soon as the ME revises his report, it will force an investigation. There is absolutely no way to pin this on you at that point. You have no motive for wanting a stranger dead, but his friends are full of them. And you didn’t serve chocolate, which was in his stomach contents. This might take some time to work its way out, but you’re going to be fine.”

“Oh Lord, that’s a relief,” he said, and I could hear Petunia laugh-crying in the background. “I’ve got about a million questions, but they can all wait until you’re allowed to talk. I hate to think that one of those young people is a murderer though. They all seemed nice—well, except the one who died. I know you’re not supposed to speak ill of the dead, but he seemed a bit of a butthead.”

“I think he was a lot worse than that, but you can’t just go around killing people, much to my dismay at times.”

Corndog chuckled.

“This will get handled,” I said. “Either Bryce will have to step up and do his job or I’ll figure out a way to get the state police involved. Regardless, it’s no longer on you and that’s what we needed.”

“I don’t know how we’ll ever thank you. Our nephew said you were absolute hell and if anyone could figure this out it would be you. I thought he was going on at first, but then you punched that gator and I knew if you couldn’t fix it, no one could. I owe you.”

“You don’t owe me anything. I’m happy to help. But maybe Carter and I could sneak away for a couple days and stay at your house. I think he would really enjoy it.”

“We’d love to have you. Just name the date.”

I disconnected and smiled. That was the best part of the job. When the good guys won.

The only thing that would have been better was seeing the look on Bryce’s face when he realized Simpson was no longer under his thumb.

We spent several hours out around Houma, first cruising some shops where Gertie picked up a couple of knickknacks and Ida Belle managed to find an antique reel that she wanted for her bookshelves. I balked at more stuff to dust, so I managed to get away with no shopping bags. But carrying them into the hotel was a good cover, and I was glad I’d suggested it because we ran into Morgan and Amanda in the lobby.

Morgan gave us a big smile. “Fancy meeting you here. I see you’ve gotten your shopping in.”

“Only a couple hours,” Gertie said. “But my feet need a rest.”

“Your wallet needs a rest,” Ida Belle said.

“Rose covered the hotel with points, remember? That gives me extra cash to spend.”

“Maybe you should spend it on better walking shoes or a cane.”

Amanda and Morgan both grinned and I could tell they enjoyed my ‘aunts’ antics. If they only knew.

“How was your dance last night?” I asked.

“Unfortunately, as bad as high school,” Amanda said. “I swear, if it wasn’t for Brittany, I wouldn’t have come. It’s like some of these people never progressed beyond senior year.”

Morgan nodded. “Sad but fairly accurate. I think that’s what happens when you stay in a small town and never branch out. Brittany and Daniel aren’t so bad, though.”

“Not as bad, but they still have their moments. Anyway, we just came in from the barbecue, which was even more exhausting because everyone had their kids. Good Lord, our class loves to have a bunch of babies. I think I’m skipping the dinner tonight. It’s a pizza party, and if I have to pretend that one more tiny, shriveled human is the second coming of Christ, I’m going to need a vacation to recover from my class reunion.”

I laughed. “I completely understand. I tend to stay away from children if possible and babies outright terrify me.”

Morgan laughed. “You really should go to Amanda’s girls’ night, Rose. You two have a lot in common. Anyway, we’re about to hit the pool and order drinks all afternoon. If you guys feel like a dip, maybe we’ll see you out there.”

“Oh!” Gertie perked up. “Is there a hot tub?”

“There is,” Amanda said. “Which would probably be good for those feet of yours.”

“Better than more shopping for sure,” Ida Belle said. “Wouldn’t mind sticking my own feet in, but I’m not putting on no bathing suit. Haven’t owned one in forty years and I’m darned well not going to start again now.”

“I think you’ll be fine rolling up your pants and sticking your feet in,” I said and gave Morgan and Amanda a smile. “Maybe we’ll see you out there. I could definitely use a drink and a pool lounger.”

Amanda gave me a knowing nod. “I’ll bet.”

They headed off for the pool and Ida Belle frowned.

“If Amanda committed a murder or knows who did,” she said, “she’s awfully relaxed about it.”

I shrugged. “The good ones always are.”

“Are we going to the pool?” Gertie asked, looking hopeful. “I brought my suit. I used it to wrap some dynamite sticks. You have to plan for everything.”

Ida Belle’s expression was priceless.

“I didn’t bring a suit, but I have shorts and a tank and wouldn’t mind stirring up some more conversation,” I said.

“You think we’ll hear from the ME?” Ida Belle asked as we headed for our room to change.

“Doubt it. He’s probably checking his passport and packing his valuables to move. But now that it’s going to be a homicide investigation, Bryce will be by to question the friends. Maybe we’ll get lucky and he’ll do it while they’re at the pool. He’ll want to catch them before they leave town.”

Ida Belle snorted. “Bryce working on the weekend?”

I shrugged. “He might if he’s afraid the state police will swoop in and take over. They might notice the gaps in his ‘work.’”

“We can only hope.”

Twenty minutes later, I was propped on a pool lounger next to Amanda and Morgan, drinking a cold beer. Gertie had staked her spot in the hot tub and seemed determined to remain there the rest of our stay. Ida Belle sat on the edge, her feet dangling in front of one of the jets. She occasionally gave an involuntary jump, claiming it tickled.

As soon as we got through the regular pleasantries and I’d gotten my drink, Morgan asked if I’d heard anything else from Corndog and Petunia. He tried to sound casual, but I easily picked up on the edge in his voice.

I shook my head. “But then, I don’t expect I will. I don’t know them really. We just overheard some things we weren’t supposed to hear. I can’t help but worry about them though. They were really nice, and that sheriff seemed like he was out to get them.”

They both nodded.

“The sheriff is an ass,” Amanda said. “My firm only deals with financial cases and even we’ve heard the stories.”

“I wish there was something we could do,” Morgan said. “I still think if one of us claimed to have brought in something with peanut butter, it would be enough to muddy the water. ”

“Sure,” Amanda agreed, “but the only two who have the backbone to pull it off are you and me, and we’re the only two with careers on the line if we get wound up in it with that idiot. I feel horribly for Corndog and Petunia, but I’m not sacrificing my career for them. Lying to cops about a death is a really bad look for an attorney, even one who’s not practicing criminal law. Besides, it’s not a surefire path to anything.”

Morgan frowned. “It’s not?”

Amanda shook her head. “Think about it—if one of us says we brought in a candy bar with peanut butter in it and we think that Justin might have eaten it, all it will accomplish is an autopsy. Then when they don’t find any of said candy bar in the stomach, we’re right back to square one but with our names on a suspect list.”

Morgan’s shoulders slumped. “I hadn’t thought it through that far, but I guess you’re right. I just have trouble believing Corndog made a mistake. I know he forgets things and I suspect he needs glasses, but his mother had a peanut allergy. I just can’t fathom him fouling up that big on something so important.”

Amanda shook her head. “But if his memory isn’t what it used to be, it only took a few seconds of lapse to pull the wrong container of oil off the shelf.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

He let out a sigh and I could see how troubled he was. In contrast, Amanda’s expression was completely blank and her tone neutral. I was absolutely certain she knew or suspected something, but she was giving zero indication. She’d have been hell as a criminal attorney. Or a CIA agent.

I was trying to figure out a way to prompt more out of them when the rest of the group turned up. Brittany and Daniel came out first and sat in chairs on the other side of Morgan and Amanda, and Nicole dropped into a chair next to me. Tyler, her ever-present shadow, dragged another chair over and positioned it next to Nicole.

“Let me move,” I said. “I don’t want to get in the middle of your reunion stuff.”

Nicole waved a hand at me. “Stay where you are. We’ve reunioned enough for the next ten years. I take it you’re still on a parish tour with the aunts?”

I waved a hand at the hot tub. “We’re currently letting feet recover from all the shopping earlier. Aunt Gertie bought bags full of stuff that she’ll have to dust. That’s Aunt Ida Belle’s official description.”

Nicole smiled. “Seniors are a law unto themselves, aren’t they?”

“Mine certainly are.”

Daniel had given me a curt nod when they approached but Brittany had remained silent, absorbed with something on her telephone. Then she dropped the phone and gave the pool a wistful look.

“You going in?” Nicole asked her.

“No,” she said. “My hair has been through enough this week, and you know how much chlorine they dump in these hotel pools, but I wish our pool was big enough for a diving board.”

“I have an extra swim cap in my bag,” Nicole said.

“We should order room service first and have it delivered out here,” Daniel said to Brittany. “You barely ate anything at the barbecue.”

Brittany’s mouth pursed in slight annoyance. “I had plenty. Just because I didn’t pile up my plate three times like others doesn’t mean I didn’t get enough.”

Daniel looked a bit frustrated at her response, which seemed a little odd, but since I couldn’t see how it had anything to do with Justin’s death, I dismissed it as typical husband/wife stuff. I was just about to ask Nicole about the chocolates, figuring I might get a reaction from Tyler, who had given me a half-hearted wave and remained silent, when my phone signaled a text from Ida Belle.

I looked up and realized she was no longer at the hot tub. In fact, she wasn’t in the pool area at all. I queued up the message.

Bryce is in the lobby asking for the suspects.