Chapter Eleven

For a while, all Tam could see was ash. He couldn’t hear what was happening around him, couldn’t feel anything but the solid weight of Idris’s hands tightly holding on.

And then he was falling.

He hit the ground, whole again, cleansed from the Queen’s magic by the water of the portal. His ears were still ringing, the sound of explosions in the distance sharp jolts of pain that seemed to echo in his mind, and yet through it all he heard the faint sound of Idris’s laughter.

He forced his eyes open: he could make out the blurry shape of Idris beside him, the silhouettes of Arlyn and Yuli soon joining him on the ground, their hands cool as they reached out to touch him.

“I can smell burning,” he said, feeling somewhat dazed.

“Yeah,” Idris choked out a laugh then sniffed, wiping his nose on the back of his sleeve. “It’s bonfire night.”

Tam vaguely recalled Idris telling about bonfire night, the one night of the year where he felt sorry for the insufferable firemen. The sky above him was full of light, flashes of red and gold and green that sparked through the night, just like the stars of Faerie, and Tam made no effort to move from his spot on the ground. He had Idris to his right and Yuli curled up to his left and Arlyn stood above them all, axe in hand, as they all let themselves breathe in the cool night air.

“Why are we on the ground?” he asked after a while. It hadn’t seemed important before; all he had cared about was that it was finally over, but now with the cold of the night seeping in through his clothes he began to wonder what exactly had happened.

“Idris dropped you,” Arlyn said wryly. “But thank goodness he managed to hold on long enough to get you through the portal.”

“You have been so brave,” Tam murmured, reaching a hand out to cup Idris’s face. Idris caught his hand, and turned his face to press a kiss to Tam’s palm, his beard gently scratching and reminding Tam that this was all real.

“I had help,” Idris said softly, nodding across at Yuli and Arlyn. Tam turned, rolling away from Idris in order to pull Yuli into his arms.

“I am beyond relieved that you are finally safe,” he told her. “You have witnessed far more than any child should and I will do my best to ensure you never suffer in such a way again.”

“I know,” Yuli said simply.

Tam squeezed her tightly, then remembered the duck he had stashed away in his jacket in the hope of tracking her with it. He pulled it out, and offered it to her.

“Is she not too old for toys?” Arlyn snorted, though there was a smile pulling on her lips as she watched.

“It is not a toy, it is a memory,” Tam said, warmth filling his heart as Yuli clutched the knitted duck to her chest the exact same way that she had when he had first given it to her. He had no idea if it would ever be safe for her to return to Faerie, but at least she had a tiny memento of her time there. At least she still had her family.

The weight of the future began to press down on him, so many questions and possibilities all spinning in his mind.

“What do we do now?” he wondered, directing his question to the world at large.

“I don’t know,” Idris admitted. “But we should start by leaving here. It’s a little ways to my house but it’s not far- we can regroup there, talk things through.”

“Do you have food?” Arlyn asked, as blunt as ever. “I am ravenous after that fight.”

Idris laughed, and stood up, offering his hand out to Tam to help him up. “We can order takeaway,” he said. “It’ll blow your minds.”

Both Grey and Velvet Night seemed discomforted by the trip through the portal, and as Idris had explained that horses were not such a common mode of transport in his world Tam dismissed them, letting them gallop away into the sky. They would return when needed, as they always did, but Tam felt a little on edge without them. He did his best to put it from his mind.

Tam took one of Yuli’s hands in his, her duck clasped tightly in her other, and followed Idris as he made his way through the shadows of the park. Arlyn followed them a few paces back, constantly turning around to check that they were not being followed.

The park grew lighter as they walked, strange man-made lights growing up from behind the trees to illuminate the path ahead. Tam could see the roofs of houses in the distance, lower and smaller than those of Genova. There was iron there, iron and steel and all manner of unnatural materials, but there was enough green to temper it.

“Idris?” a woman’s voice suddenly rang out in the night, full of disbelief. It was hard to make out her features, as she was standing in the shadow of a large hedge, but as she stepped forward into the light Tam recognised her as one of Idris’s friends. Addison, he thought.

“Idris!” she called again, this time running over towards them.

Arlyn shifted beside Tam, and he could tell she was reaching for her axe, unsure of whether Addison was friend or foe.

“Be still,” he said under his breath; she shot him a glance, but lifted her hands away from her axe.

“Addison,” Idris said, sounding confused, “what-”

“Yusuf al-Kaysani,” Addison growled, punctuating each syllable with a forceful punch to Idris’s shoulder. “How dare you ghost us like that? And what the hell was up with that letter you sent? It came down my chimney like freaking Harry Potter.”

“Oh, yeah, so funny story-”

“Jesus, is that a sword? Idris, why do you have a sword?”

“I have an axe,” Arlyn said, an undertone of warning in her voice.

“And I have a dagger,” Yuli added brightly, holding up a knife she’d taken from one of the goblins. Arlyn made an appreciative noise. Addison looked even more perplexed.

“Why does the kid have a knife?! Why do you have a kid?”

Idris exhaled loudly, his breath misting in the air. “It’s kind of a long story,” he said. “I don’t even know if I can explain.”

“Try,” Addison demanded, crossing her arms and jutting her chin out as she looked up at Idris.

“I don’t know where to begin but Addison, don’t get me wrong, I’m beyond thrilled to see you but why are you here?” As confused as Addison seemed to be about the whole situation, Idris seemed to be equally perplexed.

“Oh that was Owen.” Addison shrugged.

“Owen?”

“Yeah, he was late to mine last night, said he kept feeling an odd pull to walk through this park. I mean I thought he’d just been pre-drinking without us, but then your weird-ass letter arrived and this morning when I went for my run I found myself running laps around that pond over there. I mean what the fuck Idris, is there something addictive in this pond you managed to get on those letters?”

Idris looked startled, and Tam quickly stepped in.

“It is my fault entirely: I realise now there was some lingering compulsion to journey to Faerie on Idris that transferred to his letter to you. It should pass in a day or so.”

Addison’s eyes narrowed. “What the hell? Idris, have you been doing drugs? Is this your dealer? Am I high right now?”

“No! No, no drugs,” Idris quickly said. He cast a despairing glace at Tam, a glance Tam could only respond to by quirking his face into an expression that said “I do not have a single idea how to deal with this”. Luckily, Arlyn was far more prepared than either of them, pushing between them to stand in front of Addison.

“Is there somewhere to shelter from the cold nearby?” she asked smoothly. “I think there is much explaining to be done.”

◆◆◆

Addison led them to a nearby building, a place called a restaurant where they were provided with shelter and food. Addison had called Owen on her phone as Idris explained the food to the rest of them, and once Owen and the food had arrived it was time to explain.

Idris did most of the talking, doing his best to answer all of Addison’s and Owen’s questions as he ate and did his best to bandage both Tam and Arlyn up at the same time. Tam had joined in when needed, elaborating on the complex rules of Faerie that Idris struggled to explain.

Tam had eaten an entire plate of pasta as they talked, a food that seemed to take the place of either potatoes or bread and yet tasted so much better than either. It had been covered in something called pesto, which Idris had amusedly pointed out came from Genova, and Tam would have asked for a second plate were it not for the fact that Addison and Owen seemed to have an endless well of questions which required his attention.

They were both sceptical, as he had feared, but something about Idris’s earnestness seemed to have started to bring them round.

“If you wait until I’ve charged my phone I can show you,” Idris said, tying off the ends of the bandage around Arlyn’s arm. “I have so many pictures. And my bank account! There’ll be a transaction at an Italian ice cream parlour from this morning.”

Addison bit her lip. “If you were anyone else, Idris, I’d say you were mad.”

“But?” Idris prompted. “I feel like there’s a ‘but’ coming.”

Addison gave a wry smile. “I dunno, something about the last couple of days just didn’t seem right, and either there’s something in the water or you’re telling the truth.”

Owen nodded in agreement. “That letter you got before you left was weird: I’ve never willingly gone to a park on my own before. And then you showing up with these three? Sure. Believing you is easier than trying to figure out what the hell is happening on my own.”

“That’s not quite the vote of confidence that you think, Book,” Addison said lightly, and Idris laughed.

“I’ll take it.”

“I cannot lie,” Yuli piped up. “And everything Idris said is true.”

It was the first time Yuli had spoken since they’d arrived at the restaurant, the constraint of having to sit somewhere so foreign and so enclosed making her uncharacteristically shy.

“Sure, sweetie,” Addison said, giving her a smile. “It’s ok, I believe you.” Her eyes landed on the glass next to Yuli’s plate, and her smile quickly turned to a frown.

“Tam, please tell me your little sister isn’t drinking wine?”

Tam shot a glance over at Yuli, who took a large gulp from her glass and grinned.

“It has a little water in, it is fine,” Tam assured her. Owen spluttered. “If wine is not an appropriate drink for children here then she will be happy with small beer too. Or fruit juice.”

“Maybe fruit juice,” Idris suggested.

Tam nodded, and tugged at the collar of his shirt. The restaurant, was slowly beginning to suffocate him: it was too warm, too unnatural, the air too thick and stifling.

“Could we perhaps open a window?” he asked.

“A window?” Owen looked shocked. “It’s November.”

“Is it?” Tam asked politely, unsure of how that related to windows at all. Idris gave Owen a frown, then leant across to open the window by their table. It didn’t open much, but it was enough for a draft of fresh air to rush in, clearing Tam’s head.

“Finally, air,” Arlyn muttered, and Yuli crawled across Idris’s lap to stick her face to the window, gulping down lungs of the cool air with exaggerated breaths.

“Can we go back to the bit where Tam is apparently going to stay here,” Addison said, eying Yuli sideways. “Because that is not going to be easy. Like the legal side of things is going to be a bitch- it was hard enough me coming to this country let alone someone coming from a world that shouldn’t even exist. Where are we even going to say he came from?”

“I will say I from Genova,” Tam decided.

“But that’s a lie,” Idris pointed out. “Can you lie now?”

Tam shook his head. “It is a partial truth: I am from everywhere I have ever visited. I cannot be defined by my place of birth alone.”

“God, Idris, you’re dating a hippie.” Owen took a long drink from his glass. “Actually no, this is great, we’ll say that Tam here grew up on some new age commune. That’d explain, well, everything, even the horse.”

Tam narrowed his eyes at Owen. “I feel as though you are mocking me somehow.”

Owen paled a little, and Idris laughed.

“You shouldn’t take anything Owen says seriously,” he told Tam. “We don’t. And Owen, Tam has a sword.”

Owen took a nervous drink from his glass, and decided not to say anything else.

“What about you two?” Addison asked, quickly covering Owen’s silence by turning to Arlyn and Yuli.

“I want to stay with Tamriel,” Yuli said. “I don’t want to go back to Papa, and I want to try ice cream.”

“You can have as much ice cream as you wish,” Tam said fondly. He would do anything to try and help erase the trauma of the past few days for Yuli.

“Ice cream and uh, maybe child counselling?” Idris added. “I’ll explain later,” he said, when Tam opened his mouth to ask what that exactly was.

“Sure,” Addison threw her hands in the air. “If we’re going to have to go through the trouble of sorting Tam out we may as well get the kid some sort of legal status here too.”

“And I will remain illegal,” Arlyn said, sounding particularly happy about that. “Though I will take Yuli with me as and when she wishes. I would not have her bound to remain here if she does not come to like it.”

“But where will you go?” Tam asked her. “Surely you do not intend to return to the Seelie Court?”

Arlyn’s lips lifted on one side, and her eyes glinted as she looked at Tam. “When Venali bid me speak to him he suggested I may find a place for myself amongst the Valkyries. Their ranks are filled of women bound by nothing but sisterhood, so I would not be signing my life away. He said they would welcome a fighter such as myself, just as he would gladly take me for the Hunt were it not for Yuli. I am loath to not take Yuli with me, but if she would prefer to stay with you then I will gladly accept that.”

“That is heartening news,” Tam said, his heart beginning to swell with joy. The Valkyries would not expect Yuli to fight until she was much older, and would look after her well, and though she would grow up knowing a life of honour she would also witness violence and suffering that would make a permanent mark on her soul. That she wanted to stay with him was a relief he had not known he had needed.

“Venali also said that he would gladly take me for a night or two, no matter what I decide,” Arlyn added slyly. “That your foolishness has bought me the affection of the leader of the Wild Hunt is a welcome reward for the misfortune of being born your sister.”

Owen, caught off guard, laughed into his drink, but sobered when Tam gave him a cold look.

“Oh I’m going to love this,” Addison remarked, snorting a little as she looked between Tam and Owen.

“Oh, Addison, I almost forgot: I got this for you.” Idris searched through his jacket pockets before pulling out the bracelet he’d chosen for Addison at the market.

Addison smiled at that, one of the first true smiles Tam had seen from her.

“You could’ve started with this,” she teased as she slipped the bracelet onto her wrist. “If I thought you bailed on me ‘cos you were buying me jewellery I wouldn’t’ve been so mad.”

“You look beautiful adorned in gold,” Arlyn told Addison seriously, and though Addison looked a little taken aback Tam could tell she was pleased by the compliment.

“I got you all presents actually, but-“ Idris broke off and shrugged, giving the others an apologetic laugh.

“I can retrieve your presents from Tamriel’s home when I next pass it in the skies,” Arlyn promised Idris. “And we will of course bring anything you wish to take, Tamriel,” she added.

“Thank you,” Tam said, and Arlyn’s eyes widened slightly.

“How human,” she said, though not unkindly.

Talk was lighter after that, with Addison and Owen’s questions less about Idris’s time in Faerie and more about Tam’s life. They were trying to make him feel welcome, Tam realised, given that they had accepted that he would be staying. He appreciated it- in Faerie, Idris had been viewed as a curiosity of sorts, but here Tam was being treated as a person. Yet another subtle but welcome difference between the realm of his birth and the land of his choosing.

He countered each question with queries of his own, asking first for more of the pasta and then questioning everything around him. Arlyn seemed less outwardly interested in the human world, but Tam could tell she was eyeing the world around her with curiosity, listening intently as Idris and Addison and Owen explained everything from electricity to something called podcasts.

They talked until everyone else in the restaurant left, and would have continued talking had the owners of the restaurant not asked them to leave. Tam felt light in a way he had never expected, a steady wave of joy washing over him that he’d briefly felt during the revel with Idris and had spent all day thinking he would never feel again.

“We’ll figure it all out,” Addison promised Tam as they parted. “You’re here now, that’s all that matters.”

“Not all,” Tam admitted, casting a look over to where Idris and Owen were showing Arlyn a strange and sleek metallic contraption on wheels.

Addison followed his gaze, a small smile on her face. “You couldn’t have picked a better accidental husband,” she said. “You’re lucky to have him. And from what you’ve both said it sounds like he’s lucky to have you too.”

“I know,” Tam nodded. “I would not be here without Idris. I would say I owe him everything but I know he would not like that.”

“I reckon you’re right,” Addison laughed. She gave him a light punch on the arm, something Tam assumed was a sign of affection rather than a threat of further violence.

“Nicol ò!” Arlyn called over to them both, genuine enthusiasm on her face. “Come and look at this! It is the human version of a horse.”

“It’s called a motorbike,” Owen said, sounding very much like a man who had repeated the same words several times over already. “And it runs on petrol, not magic.”

Arlyn rolled her eyes. “And this petrol is the transformed bodies of long dead creatures. Of course it is not magic.”

“Much better than a horse either way,” Owen insisted.

Arlyn scoffed, and turned to Addison as she joined them. “My horse can fly,” she said. “You need only say the word and I will take you on a ride far above the troubles of this mortal world.”

“I think you should put Yuli to bed first,” Addison said with a laugh, pointing to where Yuli was beginning to drift off where she was standing, her eyelids fluttering closed before she forced them back open. “But, I’m not saying no.”

“I thought Arlyn said something about her and Venali?” Idris asked Tam, his voice low so as not to be overheard.

“To us Fae, affairs of the body and pursuits of the heart are separate,” Tam explained. “Though I could not rightly tell you which is which with Arlyn.”

“Huh.” Idris was wearing a now familiar expression, one that said he was trying to puzzle out his place amongst the rules and customs of Faerie.

“You have both my heart and my body,” Tam said, reaching out to take Idris’s hand in his. “You do not fear the loss of either to another.”

Idris smiled, and squeezed Tam’s hand. “You’re rather putting me to shame,” he said. “I’ve got used to being the one coming out with romantic words like that in a relationship.”

Tam smiled, and nestled in closer to Idris, their arms pressed together from shoulder to fingertip. “I look forward to hearing them one day.”

“ One day ?” Idris laughed, pretending to be affronted. “Just you wait.”

He held onto Tam’s hand as they waved their goodbye’s to Addison and Owen, and didn’t let go their whole journey back to his house. He was wearing the gloves Tam had given him days ago, and Tam felt a brief moment of hilarity that the only items to come with them on their escape from Faerie had been knitted by him. He wasn't even a good knitter.

Idris’s house was small and sturdy, made of red brick and covered with a steep roof of tiles, and it had a generous garden to the back with overgrown grass and a large oak in one corner.

“Here we are,” Idris said, finally letting go of Tam’s hand to gesture at his house. “I didn’t make it myself, like yours, but that’s for the best really.”

“I will sleep outside,” Arlyn announced, looking at Idris’s house with disdain. “The horses shall keep me warm.”

On cue, Grey and Velvet Night cantered down from the clouds above, lit from behind with the multicoloured explosions which were still sparking in the sky.

“My neighbours are going to hate me,” Idris said mournfully.

Tam laid his hand on Idris’s arm. “I do not wish to be rude, and I look forward to many nights in your bed, but I think perhaps I will also sleep outside. For tonight at least, before Arlyn departs.”

Idris’s mouth twisted in thought. “I think I still have a tent in my garage,” he said. “Wait there- we’ll need some sort of shelter.”

“We?” Tam asked, a smile creeping onto his face.

“We,” Idris replied, flashing him a grin as he jogged backwards towards a slightly smaller building adjoining his house. A minute later he reemerged, a bundle of canvas under his arms.

“If we put this up and stuff it with every blanket I have it might not be so bad,” he said. “I’ve got a couple of hot water bottles too if anyone wants.”

“You are wonderful,” Tam told them, leaning forward to give Idris a kiss just because he could .

Together they made short work of assembling the tent, the rods and sheets of fabric fitting together intuitively. Idris brought out cushions and pillows for them, along with two large blankets stuffed with feathers that were warmer than anything Tam had ever knitted.

“It’ll be a squeeze,” Idris apologised. “I only bought it for me and Owen, but we’ll probably appreciate the extra body heat.”

Arlyn rejected the offer of a hot water bottle, but Yuli took one to rest beneath her feet, and Idris nestled the other in the middle of the blanket pile to try and inject some warmth into the night.

Grey and Velvet Night stood proudly to attention on either side of the tent, unafraid by the loud explosions in the sky. Tam went to rest his head against Grey’s, silently trying to convey his love and appreciation to the horse. Grey bowed his head, as if understanding, and Tam pulled away.

It was cold inside the tent, for Idris had made sure to leave the front flap open, but the pile of blankets was warm and welcoming. Yuli was already curled on her side, her knitted duck clutched tightly in her hands, and Arlyn contorted herself around her, covering as much of her as possible. Tam lay down next to Arlyn, not close enough to embrace her, but close enough that he needed only to flex his fingers to bring him into contact with her. Idris settled in last, tucking himself behind Tam and snuggling into him, his arms warm and solid where they hugged his middle.

He could not stay like this forever, Tam knew. Arlyn would depart back to Faerie to seek out the Valkyries, and sooner or later he would have to learn to sleep in a room made of steel and bricks. He would have to find a way to make a living for himself in a strange new world, and try to fill the gap in Yuli’s life left behind by the loss of both parents.

Idris shifted behind him, the tip of his nose rubbing against the short hairs at the nape of Tam’s neck, and Tam smiled to himself. The problems of the future did not matter. He had his sisters, and he had a husband who he knew he would swiftly grow to love with all his heart. The memories of his pain in Faerie would soon dwindle to ash, and his new life would begin.

He was home.