Chapter 11

CHAPTER 11

OCTOBER

My body is tense and rigid, my muscles squeezing under the strain of my powerful contractions. Eli’s hand rests gently on my back, offering reassurance and support, but I don’t really want that right now. I want this to be over, and I want my baby. I feel like I’ve waited so long for this. I’m ready to be a mommy. My mom is on my other side, holding my leg up. I am so tired. I’ve been in active labor for over five hours. I am so ready for this to be over. It hurts more than I thought it would. Why did I ever think I could do this without drugs?

“ARGH!” I screech as another powerful contraction rips through my middle.

“Come on, baby. You’ve got this. You’re doing do good,” Eli says. Usually, I love it when he praises me, but now is not the time. I know he’s not meaning to be driving me fucking crazy right now, so I’m trying my hardest not to yell at him, but I really, really want to, just like I see pregnant women do on TV. Then he wipes the sweat off my brow, and I only want to kiss him. These hormones are going to be the death of me.

“A few more pushes and she’ll be here,” Doctor Daria says.

“That’s easy for you to say,” I grumble.

“That’s it,” she coaxes instead of reacting to my bad attitude.

The doctor’s hands are gentle yet firm as she guides the baby's head, feeling for the perfect moment to ease it out. I know because I’m watching it from the mirror above us. I don’t know why I opted for this. I thought it would be beautiful instead; it’s gross. And painful. So painful. The sheets are indescribable and damp, my body slick with sweat as I grip Eli’s hand for support.

“Push, October,” the doctor says as my body contorts in pain, and my face twists in a grimace. Sweat beads on my forehead and my hair is wet and sticking to my skin. I can taste the tang of blood in my blood and the saltiness of my sweat as it drips down my face, yet my mouth is somehow dry, and my tongue is heavy. I bite my lips to stop myself from screaming, but who am I kidding?

The scream that rips out of my body scares me. I’m sure I look a mess, but none of that matters right now. The overwhelming scent of antiseptic is the room, and I hate that smell. I always have. I associate it with death, ever since my great-gran died in the hospital when I was fourteen, but I push past that. The doctor's hands are covered in blood, and God knows what else as she works her magic to guide the baby out. My huge belly is hard and tense beneath her touch, and the soft, downy head of my baby soon emerges, covered in a mixture of fluids and blood. And just like that, all the pain and grossness fades away and is replaced by love. So much love that I burst into tears. “Congratulations! It’s a girl.”

I look over at Eli, who also has tears in his eyes. I start to protest as the nurses take the baby away, but I know they are just cleaning her up. After what feels like forever they place her into my arms, wrapped in a receiving blanket. That fresh, newborn scent fills my lungs, and I fall in love all over again.

“You did it, baby,” Eli whispers, kissing my disgusting forehead.

“I love you, little Brielle,” I whisper to my brand-new daughter. “I love you, Eli.”

“I love you too, my beautiful girls.” He kisses me again and places a kiss on Brielle’s forehead. I melt like chocolate on a hot day.

We are his girls. Holy shit. This just got real.

Once we are released from the hospital, our little family heads home. I sit in the backseat with Brie as we drive the five miles home. I can tell something is on his mind, but he’s not saying anything. Once I’ve fed the baby and taken a long, hot shower, I sit down next to him on the couch. He’s holding our sleeping bundle of joy in his powerful arms.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“What do you mean?” I ask, the sound of his deep voice startling Brie. She settles back down without a fuss when he starts talking again, and my heart melts all over again.

“I’ve been thinking.”

“I know; I can tell when something is on your mind. Are you finally going to tell me what it is?” I ask him.

“I got a job offer from a college buddy. It would mean more money. Lots more money for us.”

“Will you like it? That’s the important part.”

“I do believe that I will. In-house counsel for a large capital investment firm for criminal and civil matters involving the company and anyone who works there. It’d never be a dull moment.”

“So what’s the problem?” I ask, knowing he’d never hesitate if it were as easy as that.

“It’s in New York.”

New York? As in New York, New York? I don’t know if I’m the kind of girl who can survive in a place like that, but I’m more than willing to find out for Eli and our family.

Smiling, decision made, I ask, “When do we leave?”

I’m already ready for our next adventure together.