NINETEEN

Ronan

I thought I could do it.

I thought I could make her come for me and not have her right there on the dusty bed in the tiny little shack on this godforsaken island.

Scrubbing a hand over my face, I half stumble over the garden bed I can't see properly in the dark.

God, I need to come.

My cock throbs with an insistent rhythm that's not letting up, even though I've removed myself from the sight of her laid out under me like tribute and the scent of her sweet little pussy.

I haven't really escaped it, though, have I? The scent of her coats my face, following me out of the cottage and tempting me every time I inhale.

Fuck!

I shouldn't have done that.

I shouldn't have let myself find out just how beautifully she comes apart on my face and my fingers. I'm willing to bet she's even more beautiful coming on a monster's cock. What a fucking travesty she didn't even know what she was capable of. Whoever fucked her in the past did a pitiful job of it, that's for sure.

What's worse, he clearly made her feel as if she couldn't even explore these things alone.

I definitely should not go back in there and show her how a real monster fucks. I've already done enough. I've done far too much for my own sanity.

What the hell do I do next week?

I can't keep her on as my assistant. Not now.

I'll set her up with a great severance package and make some calls. I have no doubt we'll find her an excellent position once this is all over.

It's a shame. The more I've gotten to know her, the more I can see she'd be a loyal and dedicated employee for the right boss. Unfortunately, it's also becoming obvious I'd have trouble keeping my hands off her. Best for everyone if I put temptation out of my way. The last thing I need right now is a scandal like that.

I make one more circuit of the garden, then steel myself to go back inside. When I do, I'm in no way prepared for what greets me.

Justine is huddled on the bed visibly shivering. She has retrieved her clothes, but they're clearly not doing enough, even with the fire I lit in the hearth. She sniffs. To top it all off she's crying.

I made her cry.

God, I'm an ass.

I shut the door quickly and go sit on the bed beside her. I have on only a light jacket, but I strip it off and tuck it around her for an extra layer of warmth. "Hey, what are the tears for, Traffic Lights?" I try to keep my tone gentle. It probably comes out gruffer than I intended, though.

She sniffs again, wiping at her face. "I'm sorry."

I sigh. "Now stop that. You're the one crying. Tell me what I did. If I hurt you or if I did something you didn't want you've got to tell me." For an awful moment I wait for her to answer.

Have I just sexually assaulted an employee?

"Was it that bad?" she whispers.

I blink. "I'm sorry?"

"Me. Was I that bad?"

"Bad?" I snort in astonishment. Then I realize what my walking out must have looked like. I curse myself. "No! No, Justine. You were perfect. I just couldn't..." I shake my head. "I couldn't stay here and not fuck you."

There. I've said it. It was rash, but what was I supposed to do?

She turns to stare at me. "You couldn't?"

"Lord knows I should have more self-control. I'm the one who just broke my own rules after all. Trampled them into the dust more like."

Justine stares at me a moment longer. "Really?"

I nod solemnly.

Her watery smile turns into a giggle. She wipes at her face. "That's not the first time."

"Huh?"

"It's not the first time you broke the rules."

I frown. "I seem to recall it was you kissing me in the spa, Traffic Lights. Not the other way around."

She shakes her head. "Not that. In bed. When you were having nightmares." There's that adorable flush on her cheeks. "You grabbed me and wouldn't let go. I didn't have the heart to wake you."

A twinge of pain in my chest. I'd pushed that worry down after it happened and refused to think about it again. Apparently, we need to talk about it now. "What do you mean I grabbed you?" God, maybe I did sexually assault an employee.

She nods. "You um... you cuddled me. It seemed to help. With the nightmares."

I groan. Not good. Not good at all.

Only, the smile on her face is almost worth the self-loathing I feel for showing such weakness in front of her.

I pat her leg. "Let me get more wood for the fire. You're cold. Not running away. Just taking care of you. OK?"

She nods.

I hurriedly collect more wood, chopping it roughly. If she says I was having nightmares I can guess what they're about: Dad.

I've not been able to shake them since the day he died twelve years ago.

I guess I never realized how badly they affect me.

Returning to the cabin, I toss a few pieces on the fire and go over to the bed. Justine has made herself comfortable, legs tucked up to her chest. But she still looks cold. She has my jacket wrapped tightly around her.

"It will get warmer soon," I tell her.

"Ronan?" Her teeth are chattering.

"Hmm?"

"Since we already broke the no touching rule, would it be OK if..." Her gaze darts away from mine. "Would it be OK if we spooned again? It's just... you're so warm."

That little stabbing pain in my side and chest is back. The only thing that relieves it is when I clamber onto the bed behind her. Fitting myself into the cramped space as best I can, I pile up the musty pillows beneath my neck to allow room for my horns and tuck myself against her.

It feels really fucking good to put my arm around her and haul her back against my chest. So good my cock twitches just when I've finally convinced it to behave.

I will it down again.

Not going there.

I have a feeling I'll never manage to keep my hands off her if we go there.

I really, really want to go there. Really want to bury myself in her tight wet pussy.

That's the first thing I think when I wake hours later with her still snuggled against me.

Of course, my cock is rock hard. It might be stuck that way. I don't know. I sure can't do anything about it.

Justine rolls toward me with an adorable little snort as she wakes, and I have to force the stupid grin from my face.

"Oh!" She lifts her head to look up at me and I stop her from scooting away.

"Where are you going?"

She flushes. "Oh. I just... did we really—" She buries her head against my side and I have to fight the urge to kiss the top of her adorably mussed hair.

"Did we fuck? No. Did I make you come better than anyone ever has? You'd better tell me." I shouldn't have said it. Somehow with her snuggled in my arms, I can't resist. In my defense she started it.

And yes, I can acknowledge that no court ever is going to uphold that.

She squeaks, apparently reading my mind. "I'm pleading the fifth."

I did make her come better than anyone has. I'm certain of it. But something about this doesn't sit right with me.

In one swift motion I roll on top of her, my hips naturally fitting inside hers. Her legs go around me. Then I realize my mistake. Being this close to fucking paradise fogs my brain a little. Who am I kidding? It's well and truly fogged already.

Nothing for it but to bluff my way through it. "Did I or didn't I make you come harder than you've ever come in your life, Justine?"

She won't look at me.

She won't fucking look at me. What's she hiding?

Rolling my hips, I grind my impossibly hard cock against the seam of her pussy.

Her eyelids flutter. Her mouth drops open.

I fucking love the way every single thing I do seems to have this effect on her.

"Tell me." My head drops until my mouth is inches from hers.

I grind against her pussy again.

"I—"

"Tell me, Justine."

"Y-you made me come harder than anyone. Myself included."

My chest swells with misplaced pride. Even now, I can recognize it's wrong. I don't care, though. Right now all I care about is the satisfaction of knowing that I was the one to give that to her. That and the lush scent blooming from her pussy and flooding my nostrils. My voice a low murmur, I ask, "Then do I need to do it again?"

Her eyes flick to mine. She licks her lips and I'm tempted to capture them in a kiss.

"Do I?" I press.

The hint of a nod. It's not enough. God, I've smashed down all the boundaries and made a bonfire on their wreckage. Too late to go back now. We'll just draw a line under whatever happens while we're on Rottager Island.

"Say it, Justine. Say what I need to hear and I'll make you scream my name. Or tell me to stop and it ends now."

Her chest heaves with a shaky breath. "Don't stop," she whispers.

Fuck me.

I prop up on one arm and reach between us, cupping her pussy over her tights. "Is that needy little pussy wet for me already?"

She nods again.

"Good. This time you're going to get yourself there. Show me that you were paying attention. I want to see you come for me again."

Her eyes go wide.

I could almost laugh at the way she freezes in the headlights like a frightened animal. Except the way she shies away from her own pleasure is enough to make me crazed.

I roll us again, taking her on top of me. Then I hold her hips, guiding her into motion as she rides me. "That's it. Use my cock. I want to see you own it." I meant her orgasm. I want to see her blossom. Only, she might as well own my fucking cock, too right now.

The second she gives in to it and rolls her hips I have to grit my teeth and will down the cum that threatens every second to spill before she's done.

This isn't about me.

It's like some sort of sick challenge I've set myself just to prove I can. That I'm still in control here.

Her motions get faster, more sure. Justine plants her hands on my chest and really lets go. It's a goddamn beautiful sight to see.

All that color in her cheeks, the sweat-damp hair clinging in tiny tendrils to her cheeks and neck. She's a fucking masterpiece.

Her chest heaves.

Her eyes are closed.

Another time, I'd tell her to look at me. Look me in the eye while she comes for me. But not yet. She's not ready for that yet.

It's an idle thought, since I'll never get another chance to watch her like this. Only, it's one I can't help entertaining as I struggle to hold back, struggle to keep myself in check while she rides me.

A series of tiny mewling noises escape her. Her brows furrow. She's close.

I cling tight to her rounded hips, pulling her backward and forward and lifting my hips. Letting myself feel the heat of her covering me.

God, the pleasure of it—even with all our clothes on—is excruciating.

Finally—finally, she shudders. She lets out a little cry.

Her eyes fly open and she looks down at me in wonder and fucked if I can't feel her sweet little pussy pulse where it rests right over my throbbing cock.

When it's done, I pull her down to relax on my chest. Because I feel her limbs trembling and I know that's what she needs.

Not because I want to hold her close. Or kiss the top of her head, or breathe in that musky, sweaty scent.

Eventually, she pushes away from me and I realize I've been stopping her from moving.

"I should ah... get myself together." She brushes her wild hair away from her face as she sits.

I grunt. "We'll have to meet the boat soon."

It's a little awkward as we gather our things to head back to the meeting point. Yet a lightness fills my chest I don't remember feeling for months. A spring in my step like I had the best sleep I've had in years.

All despite the fact my poor aching cock is still days away from any relief.