11. Gage

Chapter Eleven

GAGE

I knew it was coming, and I wanted it, but the shock of Wyatt’s kiss still hit me like a sledgehammer.I lost my breath on a gasp and couldn’t pull in a new one before he gripped my wet hair and sealed our mouths together.

This wasn’t the one-sided kiss I remembered from taking Wyatt by surprise that horrible night.His lips were firm and relentless, effortlessly parting mine and slipping his tongue between them.No build up, no easing into it.My eyes flew open, caught off guard by the sudden intensity.I’d been half-hard since he stripped down in front of me, but now I was throbbing, aching, and swollen.Nothing had ever turned me on so hard and so fast.It blew my mind. I couldn’t stifle the moan that escaped, but that was okay.He swallowed it and gave me his own right back.

Biggest mistake of my life, probably.

It was like I’d learned nothing from the last time I kissed him, even though sometimes it felt like I was still bleeding from it.This was a mess I didn’t need, but no matter how many times I told myself to back off, I couldn’t.Not now. Maybe I owed it to that humiliated kid I once was.

I slung one arm around his wet shoulders, wrapped a leg around his hips, and locked us together.The heat of his bare cock was trapped against my stomach, branding me despite the cool water.Our tongues tangled, and I fisted the back of his hair, angling his head just right.The taste of salt and chlorine lingered on his lips, but underneath it was the sweet taste of forbidden fruit I remembered in all my fantasies.

His fingers dug into my ass, but I didn’t care.I barely noticed the discomfort.If anything, I welcomed it. I wanted every mark and bruise he could leave on me, so that when it was all over and I was alone in my empty bed, I’d have proof it really happened.

My hand slid down Wyatt’s chest, tracing the hard ridges of a body perfected by what I knew was nearly religious devotion to the gym.With zero hesitation, I slipped my hand beneath the water and wrapped my fingers around his cock.He hissed, hips jerking at the touch, but I was the one who moaned in pure relief. Finally. I was finally touching him.It wasn’t the first cock I’d touched, not by a long shot, but it was the only one I’d ever wanted.

Wyatt tore his mouth from mine with a guttural, “Fuck.”

Listening to his ragged breathing was the biggest rush I’d ever felt.Better than the high after a fight or the buzz of Dom’s best whiskey.It was power like I’d never known: the realization that I could bring this fierce, steely man to his knees with a single touch.

“Come on,” I gasped, tilting my head and baring my throat.“Touch me back.”

He didn’t need to be told twice, just closed his mouth over my throat, growling and sucking hard enough to leave a mark.I shuddered. Then he grabbed me, lifting until the only thing I could do was wrap both legs around his waist.Our cocks aligned perfectly that way, slipping together beneath the water.We fell into a brutal rhythm, fast and merciless from the start.I clung to his wet shoulders, reveling in the way they flexed as he moved my hips exactly the way he wanted, working me like a tool to satisfy him.Water churned between our bodies.

“My God, Gage." His voice was so hoarse I barely recognized it.“I—I tried so hard—not to want you.Tried not to look, not to feel.I thought I could, but you’re so—so?—”

He cut himself off, like even saying it out loud would break whatever taboo he had left in his mind.Instead, he hitched an arm around my waist and lifted me full-body onto the tile ledge of the pool deck.

I leaned back, bracing myself on my elbows, watching as Wyatt’s mouth burned a trail down my naked body.He flicked the tip of his tongue across my nipples, then moved lower, tracing a path down my quivering stomach until he brushed against the head of my cock.He teased the tip with his tongue, licking it like a lollipop, before the warm, wet heat of his mouth engulfed me.

My eyes rolled back in my head, and my spine arched on reflex.I squirmed, shoving a knuckle in my mouth and biting down hard to keep from moaning.The house was empty, but the wild thrill of being here, out in the open of my childhood home, had me sweating.

I lifted my head to look down my body, desperate to watch him suck me off.Wyatt’s hair was dark against my groin, hiding most of it from me, but I could feel the way his mouth twisted like he was smiling.His tongue flicked the tip and then swirled, exploring every sensitive curve.My hips jolted up, and I spurted precum.

His fingers instantly circled the base of my shaft, squeezing hard enough to keep me right on the edge but not a step further.“Not so fast,” he gasped, pulling off with a soft, maddening pop.“I’ve waited too damn long to let you finish in seconds.”

But I wasn’t the patient type, and he knew it.

“Get back on it,” I growled, gripping his head and guiding him back down.

His dark eyes were gleaming, filled with laughter, before he parted his lips and sucked me down.I framed his head in both hands and arched my hips, urging him to take me deeper, and Wyatt cooperated by sliding his hands under my ass and pulling me further into his mouth.I could feel the moment my cock hit the back of his throat.Wyatt choked, then swallowed, and I slid just that little bit deeper, pushing me right to the brink.

“Fuck, yes,” I groaned. “So good.S-so fucking good, Wyatt…”

It was too much: everything he was giving me, everything he was forcing me to feel.I was losing my mind, drunk on a dozen sensations all at once: cool water lapping at my calves, air steaming out of my lungs, and Wyatt’s bruising hands spreading my legs wide open.

“Close,” I panted, barely able to push the word between my clenched teeth.“Wyatt, I’m gonna…”

His eyes flashed up to meet mine, and then he was all-in, cheeks hollowing as he sucked harder, tongue pressing against the thick vein beneath my cockhead.The tension that had been coiling my belly tighter and tighter finally exploded.A raw cry tore out of my chest, and I surged up onto my elbows to watch as I came, pumping helplessly down his throat.

Wyatt didn’t flinch. He swallowed every drop, milking me gently until he’d wrung out every last shiver.It was so sexy I swore I had another mini-orgasm right there, spurting weakly into that gorgeous, giving mouth until I had nothing left.

I came down slowly, staring up at the night sky while the world went strangely quiet.I was gutted. A wasteland trapped in human flesh.I didn’t know what I was feeling, or if I was feeling anything at all, and it was terrifying.

Wyatt hauled himself out of the water to sit beside me.His cock was huge and red and painful-looking, straining against his belly, but he ignored it.He placed his hand on my chest, right over my stumbling heartbeat, and frowned.

“You okay?” he asked in a voice that sounded absolutely ravaged.He grimaced, and a tendon in his neck flexed as he swallowed.

No. I didn’t think I’d ever be okay again.I’d wanted this so badly. Hell, I’d begged for it once.But as the rush faded, the sharp edges of reality had already begun to rip into the fantasy.Regret was starting to claw its way up my throat and choke me.

Wyatt’s hand was on my jaw. His thumb brushed over my lips.A few minutes ago, that touch would have felt amazing, but now it only felt too soft.Too tender. Whenever I’d imagined finally bagging him as a grown man, I’d figured on feeling a little smug and a lot victorious.

It wasn’t supposed to feel like this—like I mattered to him.

I shut my eyes and focused on my breathing, trying to ease the tightness in my chest, but it didn’t budge.

“Gage.” His voice was still rough from the exertion, but there was a gentleness underneath that I couldn’t deal with right now.“Talk to me, sweetheart.”

That set me off. I rolled away, untangling our limbs and peeling myself free of his touch.The sudden rush of night air hit me like a slap, but that only helped propel me across the pool deck to search out the clothes I’d piled on a lounge chair.

“I’m fine,” I bit out, shoving my legs into my jeans and buttoning them with less care than I should have taken.I just needed space. Room to breathe.

Wyatt stood up when I did, wary and alert as he watched me dress.I noticed with bitter regret that his arousal had begun to fade.Not that Wyatt seemed to notice; his focus was all on me.“What’s wrong?”

I busted out a harsh laugh. Not the good kind.The kind that leaves a bitter taste in your mouth long after it’s gone.“Nothing’s wrong. It felt good.You’ve got a hot mouth, Deputy.Never would’ve guessed.”

His eyes narrowed, and his expression shifted, slipping back into that hard, professional mask I used to hate when I was younger.But he didn’t walk away. He didn’t turn his back or grab his clothes like I’d half-hoped he would.No, he just stood there, confident in his nakedness, waiting for whatever I threw at him next.

It made me want to hit him with the worst I had.Anything to drive him away before he could figure out I hadn’t changed at all.Not like he thought. I was still the same messed-up kid he’d pushed aside all those years ago: older and tougher, but still twisted up on the inside.

Still broken in ways I didn’t know how to fix.

“Well?” I taunted, yanking my shirt over my head with so much force the seams popped.“We were both curious, right?Guess it just goes to show some things are better left as fantasy.Reality never matches the hype.”

Wyatt’s face tightened. Hardened.His hand twitched at his side like he wanted to grab me and shake me—maybe even clock me.Hell, I’d welcome it. It'd be a good distraction from whatever this terrible feeling was.

“Is that what this was?” His question was too calm.“Curiosity?”

I shrugged, shoving my hands in my pockets to disguise the shaking and hoping he didn't notice.“What else would it be?” I scoffed, rolling my eyes.“C’mon, Wyatt. I’m not the same lovesick kid you shot down years ago.It was just two guys scratching an itch, right?”

Something flashed in his eyes—hurt, maybe.Then his face went stony. But it was too late; I’d already seen it and felt a nasty, mean-spirited twist of satisfaction.For once, I wasn’t the one getting left in the dust.I was the one in control, the one throwing punches, the one who wouldn’t be left hurting this time.

“You’re lying,” Wyatt said. He kept his voice low, but there was a rumble of danger in it that warned me I was treading on thin ice.“You forget that I know you, Gage.I know how you felt about me.I know it was part of the reason you left.”

“Maybe you’re not as unforgettable as you think, Deputy," I sneered, latching onto my anger like a lifeline.

A muscle in his jaw ticked, and I braced myself, eager to see him finally lose it.But he didn’t take the bait. He wasn’t the type to handle problems the way I did.He just stood there, steady as stone, watching me as if he knew exactly what I was doing—and why.Then he turned and dressed without a word, stuffing his socks in his pocket and shoving his feet into his boots to get them on just a little faster.He watched me with an unreadable expression as he tucked his concealed carry holster into his belt.“I’ll keep Vanderhoff off your back as long as I can, but he’s not dropping this thing.He wants to find those guys you tangled with even more than you do—and when he does, he’ll come for you.”

“He knows where to find me,” I said coldly.

“Yeah.” Wyatt’s mouth was a flat, unsmiling line.“And you know where to find me.When you’re ready.”

I clamped my mouth shut. Nothing good would come out if I opened it again.Just something nasty that I couldn’t take back.

I watched him walkaway, shivering in my damp clothes, until the sound of his engine faded down the driveway.It was gone so quickly. I lashed out, kicking over a pool chair and sending it clattering across the cement.The sound that came out of me was a weird, hiccupy mess: half-growl, half-sob, and I jammed my fists against my eyes, breathing through the worst of thepain.

I’d hurt him. I’d meant to hurt him, but it didn’t make me feel anybetter.I felt like I was the one who’d lost.Because no matter how many times I told myself it was me pushing him away this time, I knew the truth.

I was still the one left standing alone.