CHAPTER THIRTEEN

With their wedding done, there was no time for a honeymoon. Boxes were waiting to be dug into, and Elena wanted to be sure she had a preview of everything. Walking with Major toward the offices, she spotted Walker and Mags. He tried to hold her hand, but she pulled back, and Elena felt the stab of pain in her heart.

"Will they be okay?" she asked Major.

"I don't know, baby. Mags was raped multiple times by her captors. I think Ellie told you the whole story. She's been seeing our counseling team, but I know that she's struggling. I don't think she believes that Walker could still love her."

"It appears that he could love her no matter what," said Elena quietly. Walker turned and left Mags standing at the edge of the gardens, walking in the opposite direction. "I'll be with you shortly. I'd like to say hello to her."

"Okay, babe."

He watched as his new wife walked toward the woman and then spotted Walker seated on a bench near the maze. His head was down, his shoulders shaking uncontrollably. Major sped up, stopping directly in front of him and holding out his hand.

Walker looked up to see the big hand and knew who it was. He gripped it, standing to hug his friend.

"She doesn't want me," he sobbed. "She doesn't want to be with me."

"It's not you, Walker. You know that. She doesn't believe anyone will want her. This is going to take a lot of time."

"I told her I'd give her forever," he said, wiping his eyes. Hiro, Mac, Axel, and Tango walked toward them. Someone must have whispered to the birdies that help was needed. "Am I that pathetic that I need help?" He tried to laugh but just couldn't.

"You're not pathetic, brother," said Mac. "It's just that we've all been there. All of us. Hiro, Axel, Tango, and me. We know what it's like to have a woman we love that's been so fucking damaged, so battered and abused that she can't see a possibility of life for herself."

"I don't know what to do," he sobbed, heartbroken. "I don't know what to say."

"Nothing," said Axel. "You say nothing. You just have to be there for her. Touch her if she makes the first move. Speak if she wants to speak. Laugh if she's laughing. But let her control everything, Walker. You're used to controlling the shit. You can't control this shit."

"What they did to her," he said, shaking his head.

"We know," said Hiro. "It doesn't matter if it's a stranger or someone they know. Rape is fucking brutal and leaves so many scars it's incomprehensible. Some of them, we're just now peeling back from Winter. But I don't care. I'll keep peeling those fucking scars back for another hundred years if I have to."

"Walker, it's not just going to go away," said Tango. "Taylor was brutally attacked twice. It was so bad; she didn't think I'd want her. Truth was, she was all I wanted. There would have never been another had I let her go."

"Are you willing to let Mags go?" asked Axel.

"No! Fuck, no!" he yelled. People around the property stopped, staring in his direction. "I just want to make it better."

"Alright," said Mac. "You want to make it better? For her or for you?"

"Wh-what?"

"She's making it better, Walker. Every day, she's getting better by meeting with the therapy team, talking to you and her family, her friends. Each day is better. Some days are ugly, some are normal, others are perfect. But each day she walks this earth, it gets better.

"What you're saying is that you need it better for you, easier for you. Fuck that, brother. It's not going to be easier for you. It's always going to be fucking hard. The question you need to answer is whether or not you're willing to put in the work."

"I can't live without her," he whispered.

"Then tell her that," said Axel. He nodded toward the gardens where Elena and their own wives were seated with her. She looked down the tree-lined drive and stared directly at him. He slowly walked toward her as they watched.

"Comms call you guys?" asked Major.

"Nope," smirked Axel. "Matthew."

Magnolia sat on the stone bench sobbing uncontrollably. She felt someone take the seat beside her and thought it was Walker. When painted nails appeared on top of her hand, she knew it was a woman. She never expected Elena.

"Oh, Elena. I'm sorry I'm such a mess," she said, shaking her head. Elena handed her a few tissues and just continued to hold her hand.

"I can't get their faces out of my mind. I see them above me, and I just can't breathe. They should have killed me!"

"Is that what you wanted?" asked Elena. Magnolia stared at her for a moment. Cait, Winter, Rachelle, and Taylor walked toward them. "Would you have wanted them to kill you, leaving behind a grieving man who loves you more than life itself, parents who adore you, three sisters who share a piece of your soul? Is that what you really wanted?"

The other women waited for her to respond. Just watching her.

"N-no," she said, crying again. "No. I just don't know what to do!"

"You're doing it," said Cait. "You're grieving, you're healing, you're finding your way. It's not going to happen overnight, Mags. It's going to take time. The good news is you don't have to do it alone."

"She's right," said Rachelle. "I had my family, but more than anyone, Adele helped me to get through it all. My twin. Your sisters, three-fourths of your soul, are willing to do whatever is needed. You expected to go to therapy a few times and suddenly be healed, Mags. I told you that it doesn't work that way. I'm still speaking to Bree and Calla several times a month. I still have moments of absolute panic."

"Same," said Winter. "There's so much I didn't get to learn when I was held by my grandfather's club. I didn't know basic things about the world. The other day, I learned all about Egypt from Elena. I didn't know anything about her country. It was amazing."

Magnolia smiled at the other women, nodding her head. Taylor stared at her, wondering if she was truly understanding what had to take place for her to get well.

"We all had a different experience, Mags. Yet they were all the same. Violent. It wasn't about sex. You have to get that out of your mind. If you're worried that you won't be able to enjoy sex with Walker, I can assure you that you will. If. If you're willing to put in the work.

"Being raped by my stepbrother was not something I thought I would survive. Then, being taken again and beaten again, I thought that was the end of my life as I knew it. And in some ways, it was. My life got better after that because I married a man with the patience of Job." The other women laughed, nodding their heads.

"All he did was try to hold my hand, and I pulled away," she sniffed. "Why?"

"Because you're scared," said Rachelle. "It's real, and you know it, and you're scared."

"You're scared that he's going to wake up one day and say, ‘why in the hell am I with her.' Except he won't say that. Not now, not ever. It's not who he is," said Cait.

"Do you love him?" asked Elena, still clasping her hand.

"So much. I've loved him since the eighth grade. I've never stopped loving him."

"I think he feels the same way," said Elena, nodding toward the men as they walked toward them. Mags stood and looked at the others, then hugged each one.

"Thank you for talking to me. It helped more than you know," she smiled.

"Actually, we do know," laughed Cait. "Come to us any time, honey."

Mags took off, running toward Walker as he did the same. He stopped in front of her, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. He gently wrapped his around her body, pulling her slowly against him. When she kissed him, he fell to his knees, sobbing as she rocked back and forth with him.

"Will they be okay now?" asked Elena.

"They're on the right path," said Rachelle.

"How did you all know what to say?" she asked.

"We've all been victims of sexual violence and abuse," said Rachelle. "It's my specialty in our practice here. She wants to forget, but she can't. It won't be possible. What she can do is move on and see what she has. I hope she will. If she doesn't, it will kill Walker."

"Did the communications team send you over here? Did they hear me?" asked Elena.

"No," smiled Rachelle. "My mother heard everything."

As the women walked away, Elena looked around the gardens, not seeing anyone except a few bees and some hummingbirds. Frowning, she whispered to herself.

"How?"