chapter one

lux

A Toast To The Ghost - Diggy Graves

O ur bus rolls into Fergus like a storm on the horizon—silent but heavy with the promise of chaos. I step off first, my boots crunching against the gravel and filling my lungs with the thick air that seems to promise rain. The skies are heavy, the clouds swirling in a way that mirrors the storm brewing inside me. Indie and Johnny follow, their presence as familiar to me as the darkness that clings to the night. The sign in front of us, weathered and cracked, welcomes us with faded letters: "Fergus—Where the Spirits Linger."

A smile tugs at the corners of my mouth. This place feels right. The atmosphere of the town fits the spectacle we plan to unleash on the tiny town—a dark, twisted carnival of desires, where even your most depraved cravings can and will be satisfied. This event is going to be unlike anything Cirque Du Désir has ever done.

Fergus will be our canvas, and we'll paint it red.

Indie steps up beside me, her gaze sweeping over the town with curious eyes. Her presence is intoxicating, a blend of danger and allure that keeps me on edge. She's been with us for a few weeks now. Long enough that she knows how this shit works, but there's something different about her now. I can see it in the way she carries herself, in the way her eyes gleam with excitement before every show.

Indie isn't just along for the ride anymore—she's a part of this, just as much as Johnny and I.

"What do you think?" I ask, my voice low.

Indie's lips curl into a small, knowing smile. "I think it's perfect."

Johnny doesn't speak, but I can feel his excitement radiating from him. He's always been the quiet one, but his silence hides a mind as twisted as my own. Johnny thrives on the mayhem, the blood and the fear that we sow. With Dolly gone, he's become my second hand. The one who ensures that everything runs smoothly—or as smoothly as it can when you're orchestrating a fucked up night of madness.

We climb back on the bus, and drive further into town to explore and get a real feel of the place. Normally I don't lead Cirque Du Désir to new towns or cities. I tend to enjoy returning to the places we've already been. Watching the fear and resentment in the eyes of the townsfolk when they see us pull up knowing full well the mess we left behind on our last visit. The local law enforcement won't do anything about us or what happens under my big top. They can't. Not when they themselves are some of my biggest and most loyal customers.

We walk through the deserted streets, the town all sound asleep, completely unaware of the nightmare we're about to bring. Fergus looks like any other small town, with its quaint shops and neatly kept homes, but there's something underneath, something rotten. I can feel it in the air, in the way the buildings seem to loom over us, watching. This place is haunted, all right, but not by ghosts. It's haunted by the darkness that people try to hide, the urges they bury deep inside.

Urges we're here to set free.

"Let's head back and start setting shit up," I say, breaking the silence.

The others nod, and Indie's hand tightens around mine. A sheer sign of her excitement. We head to the clearing where the cirkies are already hard at work setting up all the different tents. This show, we did something a little bit different. While the big top is still the main focus, there are now tunnels off each corner that head off into a different tent. And each of those smaller tents, will be for a different side show. But they won't be like the others, no, these ones will be run by us.

By Johnny, Indie and me.

Tonight I won't be watching the depravity from my throne, but engaging, and fulfilling desires right along with the cirkies.

Tonight, I am the king, with Indie as my queen, and the customers, they are our loyal and willing servants. They are the peasants who come to us, and depend on us to give them everything they need, and like always under my big top, in my fucking kingdom, Cirque Du Désir will make all their deranged and twisted dreams a reality.

My eyes scan the empty field we picked out. The grass is overgrown, the ground uneven, but it doesn't matter, because by the time we're done, this place will be transformed into a living, breathing fucking nightmare.

As we work, my mind races with thoughts of what's to come. The main event—the Halloween Harvest of Chaos, Carnage, and Contentment—will be unlike anything we've ever done. A true night of purging, where everyone who steps under our big top will become fair game. The masks we've prepared will strip away their identities, turning them into nothing more than beasts driven by their own desires. No one will know who's standing beside them, and that's the beauty of it. Hidden behind the mask, there will be no punishment, no judgment—only the freedom to act on their darkest impulses.

This town will never be the same again.

As the tent begins to take shape, my thoughts find their way to my Indie. My eyes move to her as she ties down one of the ropes, her movements fluid and graceful despite the rough work. Indie has become a masterpiece—a perfect blend of beauty and danger unlike anything I've ever encountered. And she knows how to use both to her advantage. I've seen the way people look at her, the way their eyes linger, but never for too long. Because everyone knows who she is, and who she belongs to. She's a force of nature, wild and untamed. She's changed so much from that girl who first entered into my big top. So much so even I never expected her to become what she has. Not that I'm complaining. There is no sign of that once, pure and innocent girl anymore. Now, she is something else. Something more sinister and carefree.

The perfect fucking match for a monster like me.

Maybe somehow, I always knew she was meant to be this. To be mine. Maybe that's why despite everything, I couldn't stop myself from having her.

From tainting her.

The tent is almost complete now, towering above us like a dark cathedral of nightmares. The sides are black as ink, and the entrance is a gaping maw, ready to swallow anyone brave—or foolish—enough to step inside. Inside, it's even darker, the only light coming from the lanterns the cirkies have hung from the rafters. The shadows dance, flickering like the thoughts in my mind.

Johnny reaches my side and lights a cigarette, the glow from the tip casting his face in harsh relief. "This is gonna be one hell of a night," he says, his voice rough as he offers me a cigarette.

I nod, my own excitement building as I pull one from his pack, and place it between my lips. "It's going to be a goddamn shit show."

He grins, a feral look in his eyes as he hands me the lighter. "Fuck, you got that right. I'll make sure of it. But fuck if I'm not excited for all of it. My dick is hard just thinking about the fucked up shit that's going to go down."

I don't doubt him. Johnny's good at what he does—too good, sometimes. But that's why he's here, why he's been with me for as long as he has. We understand each other in a way that no one else ever could. We're both monsters, cut from the same fucking cloth, and we revel in the darkness. It's where we feel the most at home.

Indie joins us. Her dark hair swaying in the wind behind her as she wraps her arms around my neck before lifting herself on her toes and pressing a soft kiss to the scarred flesh on the side of my face. Normally, I'd shudder away from the touch. But not with her. Indie is the one fucking person who can touch me, whenever, wherever and my body's natural instinct isn't to kill.

"The tent's ready," she explains with a soft tone. She's tired, that much is clear. Setting up is no easy task, everyone has been hard at work all through the night ensuring we're ready to go for tonight.

"Good," I say, looking up at the towering structure. "Let's go over the details one more time."

We huddle together, discussing the plans for the night. It's all been carefully thought out, every detail meticulously planned. The sideshows will cater to every depraved desire imaginable —spider kinks, masks, and acts so twisted that even the most hardened among us would flinch. But that's what our customers want. They come to us because they crave the darkness, because we offer them a chance to be who they truly are without fear of judgment.

But tonight's show has a little twist to it.

The masks will go on at the door, and the lights will go down. Once you're inside the big top, you're no longer a person—you're a participant. The rules are simple: there are no rules. You can do whatever you want to whoever you want. Cirkie and customer alike. It's a game of survival, a test of how far you're willing to go to satisfy your desires. And when it's all over, when the sun rises and the masks come off, only the strongest will walk away.

Most of the cirkies are as excited as we are, though there are a few who are less willing to participate, but I know how to handle them. Johnny has already been given instructions on how much to dose them, and when. By the time the show starts, they'll be more than willing. They'll be begging for the anarchy that's to come.

And if I lose a couple of cirkies, so be it. There's no shortage of drug addicts and sewer rats living in the main cities that would be more than willing to join my crew if it provided them with a roof and a full stomach.

"This is going to make history," I say, my voice thick with anticipation. "Fergus will never forget us or Cirque Du Désir."

Indie's eyes lift to mine as she wraps her arms around my middle. Using my gloved hand, I cup her chin, and I trail my thumb across the raised flesh of her scar. The scar her drunk piece of shit father marred into her once perfect and pure skin. He's lucky she killed him. Because for what he did to her, the death he got was less than what he deserved. I would've made him suffer. I'd have made him regret every foul and disrespectful thing he said or did to her, and then when he cried, and begged for me to end it all, I'd leave him for dead with no way of escaping. Locked away where no one would hear him or find him.

Alone in the dark while he took his last pathetic breath.

I take a long drag of the cigarette, filling my lungs with the toxic nicotine as I pull Indie close against me. Her eyes shine with something dark and hungry as she holds my stare. "I can't fucking wait."

Neither can I. This night will be one for the books—a blood-soaked spectacle that will cement our place in Canadian history. I can already see the headlines: "Circus of Horrors Comes to Fergus," "Town in Shock After Night of Terror." But they won't understand. They'll think we're monsters, but they won't see the truth. We're giving people what they want, what they need. We're freeing them from the chains of society, from the expectations and rules that bind them. We're letting them be who they really are, even if only for one night.

It's well into the very early hours of the morning by the time we finish setting everything up and going over our plans. The town is still quiet, still enjoying a few hours rest before they'll be waking up. Heading out to go about their day, pretending they don't have a darkness lurking within them. Some will be drawn by tent and the signs posted around the town that offer the promise of something different, something forbidden. And tonight, we'll be waiting for them, ready to give them exactly what they asked for.

I step back, admiring the tent, my mind already racing with possibilities. This is going to be the best show we've ever put on, and nothing is going to stand in our way. Not the town, not the people, not even the ghosts that haunt these streets. We're here to leave our mark, to carve our names into the bones of this place. And when we're done, all that will be left is the blood and ashes of all the desires we fucking fulfilled.

Indie nuzzles her head into my chest. It's a small gesture, but it's enough to ground me, to remind me of why we're doing this. For her, for us, for the darkness that we share. Now that we're here, Fergus doesn't stand a chance.

The cirkies crowd around us, as we all take a moment to admire the sight of what we've accomplished.

"Let's get some rest everyone," I say, my voice a low growl. "Tonight will be here sooner than we know it, and we need to be ready."

The others nod, and head off to their buses with Johnny close behind them. Indie and I move as one, our steps echoing in the stillness. Tonight is ours, and by the time the sun rises tomorrow morning, Fergus will belong to us, too.