1. Auslin

Chapter 1

Auslin

A uslin tilted his head with a sigh as Kio sucked his dick. A sudden growl made Auslin arch with physical pleasure. His lover was a half-dragon shifter, which meant he looked like a human, except for his fangs and retractable claws. He lacked the distinctive markings and magic full shifters had.

Kio slapped Auslin's hand away with a grumble when the human caressed his hair. He glared with fierce annoyance in his yellow eyes.

Auslin frowned but kept his hands to himself. It was hard when he loved petting Kio's soft silver-black hair. He instead focused on the sensations to allow himself to come so they could finish the rest of their journey. It was a relief to almost be home after weeks on the road. Auslin was an auramancer mage who helped heal people and bring them comfort while he traveled.

Kio tightened his grip on Auslin's thighs, his claws digging in slightly. It was enough to make Auslin orgasm, giving him a momentary flash of bliss that was sure to desert him soon.

The half-shifter wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He looked expectantly at Auslin with impatient yellow eyes. "You're good now, yeah?"

There it was: the harsh crash down to reality. That could only mean one thing. He stretched out his senses to get confirmation. A half-wolf shifter named Maseo was right on the edge of his periphery. Kio claimed they were exes, but he was always quick to run off to be with Maseo whenever he was in the mood for something rougher than he felt Auslin could handle. It shattered Auslin's heart a little more each time it happened.

The one time Auslin had pushed about Kio's philandering ways, the anger it unleashed scared him enough to drop the matter. He told himself that being with his lover part of the time was better than none of the time. But he was tiring of making excuses for his heartbreak.

"I'm going for a quick hunt before the Day of Remembrance Festival gets started tonight," Kio said. "I'll meet up with you later, okay?"

Auslin tried to close his heart off from the hurt that never seemed to leave. "Yeah, sure. "

"See you later." Kio disappeared in the blink of an eye. Auslin could feel the half-dragon shifter already heading in the direction where Maseo was waiting.

Self-hatred burned within Auslin for not being strong enough to break up with Kio. How much longer would he condemn himself to suffering heartache? They had been together for years, but lately, it felt like Auslin's heart was only loyal to the relationship he used to have with Kio rather than the man himself.

Instead of wallowing in his self-pity, Auslin stood up and rearranged himself to be presentable. He shouldered his heavy pack, then headed toward Tiora, the capital of Valzerna, where the Day of Remembrance Festival was about to get started in earnest. It was an annual event dedicated to remembering ancestors and the heroic deeds of heroes from the past. Everyone celebrated with joyous passion as the whole town turned out for the events.

Auslin was expected to appear on behalf of the local temple he had lived at since his childhood, but he wasn't in a celebratory mood. Part of him wanted to skip it this year and head straight to his room to sleep away his long travels. However, his stubbornness reminded him he had promised Kio to meet at the festival, so he had to go.

Lost in his thoughts, it startled Auslin when he recognized the aura of who was approaching him from behind. He took a steadying breath as he prepared himself for the encounter with Kio's older half brother, the dragon shifter monarch of Valzerna. King Kitsuki Ariake was known throughout the region as the Ice King for his cold, detached aloofness, but he was also praised widely for being a fair and generous lord.

Kitsuki slowed as he approached Auslin. Despite being a deadly shifter, he was an ethereal beauty with long, silver-and-blue hair, icy-blue eyes, and pale skin. It gave him the appearance of being made of moonlight and magic. He was as handsome and regal as ever in his white breeches and midnight-blue jacket with ornate gold trim. The wide bell sleeves hid his missing arm.

Auslin bowed respectfully. "How are you on this beautiful evening, Your Majesty?" Despite the animosity between Kio and Kitsuki, Auslin had a soft spot for the ruler. It pissed off Kio, especially since Kitsuki had tried to kill Auslin the first time they met. But Auslin knew there was more to that incident, and he was a forgiving type.

Kitsuki hesitated for a moment. "I must confess, I am not fond of this day's festivities."

"It can be a hard day." Some of Auslin's misery leaked into his tone despite himself.

The ruler's gaze visibly darkened. "I suppose my foolish half brother is indulging in his own twisted version of the Day of Remembrance with things best left forgotten? "

Auslin looked down with a pained heart. "Something like that, yeah."

"You would be so much better off without his disgusting behavior dragging you down." It was a sentiment that Kitsuki had echoed on numerous occasions previously, but it never failed to surprise Auslin.

They naturally fell into step together as they walked in the general direction of the capital. Auslin knew it wasn't his place to say anything, but he couldn't help it. "You only say that because you hate him."

"No, I say that because you are a far better gift than that foul creature deserves." Kitsuki's venomous tone startled Auslin. "Your kindness is wasted on the likes of him."

"Maybe if more people had shown him such kindness, he wouldn't be this way." Auslin believed in his words. Kio had been treated horribly throughout his life because of being a half-shifter. Both humans and shifters alike rejected him for his mixed heritage. The experience had hardened Kio's heart over the centuries, but Auslin had always thought he could help heal that hurt through love. Somehow, Auslin was the only one who ended up being hurt, though.

Kitsuki scoffed. "That fool could have been granted every kindness in this world, and he would still be an ungrateful bastard, undeserving of one such as yourself."

"Considering your hatred of me, that almost sounds like a compliment." Auslin glanced up at the much taller shifter to find his expression perfectly blank, as always.

After a long pause, Kitsuki spoke again. "I have never hated you. I am incapable of it."

Auslin arched his eyebrows in shock. He had made similar comments in the past that Kitsuki had always disregarded instead of acknowledging. "Are you forgetting the part where you tried to kill me the first time you saw me?" Auslin playfully asked with a grin.

A flicker of disturbance passed through Kitsuki's blue eyes. "I deeply regret I attacked you that day. I was not myself in that moment."

It was the closest thing to an apology Auslin had ever received for that encounter. "You were in so much pain that day. It was understandable."

"Pain?" Kitsuki repeated with a sneer. "Kio could never come close to landing a blow that could hurt me."

"No, not from him. Because of me."

Kitsuki stiffened beside him. "Why would you think such a ridiculous thing?"

Auslin told the dragon monarch the truth. "Because I feel like I always end up hurting you just by being me, and I can't figure out why." Kitsuki was silent for many long moments, making Auslin regret his comment. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to?—"

The dragon king interrupted Auslin's apology. "Why would you say such a thing?"

"Am I wrong?"

"You are presumptuous," Kitsuki coldly replied. However, Auslin swore he could see flecks of hurt coming through those blue eyes despite the shifter's best efforts to hide his emotions.

It filled Auslin with the strength to be brave. He got in front of Kitsuki to stop him from walking. "But am I wrong?"

"What answer are you hoping to receive?"

"I don't honestly know." Auslin had already crossed a line, so he kept going. "But sometimes you look at me with so much hurt, and it breaks my heart. I don't know what I've done or how to fix it, but I want to help you."

Kitsuki walked around him. "You should not concern yourself with such things."

"Maybe I shouldn't." Auslin hurried to catch up with Kitsuki and fell into step beside him once more. "Perhaps I should be like everybody else and believe the stories that you are the cold, emotionless Ice King. But I can't do that when I think the truth is you feel things so deeply that you hide behind that fa?ade to protect yourself."

"You know nothing of what I have lived through." Rather than sounding angry, all Auslin could hear was the weariness brought on by centuries of hurt. "Why would you care? I am the hated half brother of your lover. I have also tried to kill you before. Yet, you continue to show me such sympathies. Perhaps you are a bigger fool than Kio."

"I probably am," Auslin told him with a wry grin that slid into sadness. "But I know beyond that, you also saved my life on two separate occasions when I wasn't with him. That counts for something. If you don't view me as your enemy, why should I treat you like one?"

Kitsuki shook his head. "You would be better off if you did."

"I wouldn't be me if I did."

The comment once again caused a flicker of emotions in Kitsuki's eyes, but it was gone as soon as it came.

It surprised Auslin when they entered the open field at the base of the temple. He hadn't realized they had walked so far already.

Kitsuki escorted him to the bottom of the long staircase that led up the large hill to the temple on the fringe of the capital. "The only thing I hate is that you debase yourself with the likes of my pathetic excuse for a half brother, who does not value the love you unwisely hold for him."

Auslin bit his lower lip for a moment as he debated the merits of pushing the conversation further. However, given Kitsuki's unusual chattiness, he pursued it further than he normally would dare. "Why do you seem to care about that so much?" It had always been a mystery to him why Kitsuki would make those kinds of statements.

"Because your love is a gift he will never be capable of understanding its true worth," Kitsuki said in a soft voice. "He is unworthy. You deserve someone who loves you with all his heart and treats you like the treasure you are."

The comment touched Auslin deeply. As Kitsuki had done the two times he had saved Auslin's life, he hesitantly reached out, his hand hovering mere inches from caressing the mage's face.

It disappointed Auslin when the dragon king pulled back before touching him. But he could already see Kitsuki walling himself off again. Auslin reflexively said, "I'm sorry."

"You do not need to apologize." His cold aloofness was already back in place. It made Auslin want to tear the bricks out of Kitsuki's emotional wall to get close to him. "I merely speak the truth."

Auslin felt the strangest urge to reach out and hold Kitsuki's hand, but he ignored it out of self-preservation. He instinctively knew that would take things too far. The last thing he wanted to do was lose the progress they had made tonight. "I never meant to?—"

"Think nothing of it." Kitsuki stepped back to put more distance between them. "I wish you a pleasant time at this evening's festival. Perhaps you will celebrate by finally finding the strength to leave my half brother in the past where he belongs. "

Auslin couldn't think of anything else to say to keep Kitsuki with him any longer. "Please take care of yourself, Your Majesty. I hope we can meet again soon."

Tilting his head in silent acknowledgment, Kitsuki turned and walked away.

Auslin waited until the dragon king disappeared into the forest. Only then did he start the long walk up the stairs to home.