5. Maggie

MAGGIE

M any little girls dream of a wedding day. You know. The whole true love, marry the man of your dreams, live happily ever after thing.

I never did. Not really. I didn’t have other dreams, per say, I just didn’t think about it. My mom lived her life rather happily unmarried, and I just assumed that I would do the same.

Being a therapist, or a social worker, or both, mattered to me a whole lot more.

Well. Being productive and making myself part of the world.

I mean, being in love sounded nice , but it wasn’t something I dreamed of.

And I definitely did not think it would happen like this.

I thought that Russia was kind of a religious place, but the ceremony seemed pretty darn agnostic. I repeated a bunch of words, which Elena translated for me quietly and quickly behind my shoulder, and before I knew it Alexei and I were married.

Afterwards, Elena, the priest, Alexei and I were alone in the room where the ceremony had happened.

Alexei had a glass of vodka, and was doing his best to mainline it straight into his veins. Elena and the priest chatted softly in Russian, and she gently ushered him to the door.

She cast a meaningful glance at Alexei, and barked something at him, then left.

I looked away.

The room’s silence felt deafening.

“She told me not to move,” Alexei said softly.

I blinked, glancing over at him.

“The priest is worried about the storm. Elena agreed that he should get moving, or he’d have to spend the rest of the day at Orlov House until the storm lifted.”

“Oh,” I say softly.

Alexei pulls out his phone and looks at it, then snorts. “The weather doesn’t call for anything so dramatic. No one will be stranded anywhere.”

“Why were they worried?”

The very corner of his lips pulls into a smile. “Elena said her knees hurt, and the priest agreed that the storm was pulling on his back.”

“That happens to my mom too,” I murmur, my lips curling slightly.

Alexei looks at me.

I look down at my hands. “When the weather changes, or when there’s a big storm, she always says that her hip hurts.”

“I guess that’s one benefit of getting older. You can predict the weather,” he says.

“Yeah. Well. I guess we’ll find out.”

I meant it in the sense that we’d just said vows. Granted, they were in Russian, but they can’t be all that different than when they’re said in English. For better or for worse, as long as we both shall live, is kind of part of the whole thing.

Alexei, however, seems to interpret my attempt at a joke very poorly. He makes a snarly noise in his voice and downs the rest of the vodka in one gulp.

Great.

I’m married to a man I don’t know anything about, and I have pissed him off.

Again.

I tuck myself close, my hands wrapping around my elbows.

The silence is thick again.

“Your mother. Is she… she should be here,” Alexei says.

My head snaps up, and I stare.

He’s looking at me, his eyes studying me. He’s intense. I realize that I’ve been spending so much time not looking at Alexei, that I don’t actually know what my new husband looks like.

So I take the opportunity to look.

He’s beautiful. He really is. Sapphire-blue eyes in a face that’s sculpted from marble. Dark blonde hair that contains glimmers of lightness, which catch the faint glimmers of muted snowy light from the windows.

He’s tall. His shoulders are wide, and underneath his dress shirt, I can see the flex of his chest and shoulder muscles.

If I had to conjure myself a husband, I’d be happy with how this one looks, for sure.

One of his eyebrows twitches. “Or, are you happy to not have her here?”

“No. I mean. I’m not sure,” I say.

Alexei tilts his head again.

“I love my mom. She’s all I have in the world. She’s the reason I’m here,” I huff.

“She is?”

I narrow my eyes and look at him. “Why do you think I agreed to this?”

“I have no idea, Magdalena.”

The sound of my full name makes me sit up straight. “It’s Maggie.”

“I bet you let those familiar with you call you Maggie.”

“I do.”

“Then it seems appropriate for me to use Magdalena.”

“Wow. So this is it? Strangers, even though we just got married?”

He tilts his head. “You were telling me why you agreed to this.”

My heart breaks a little at the fact that he doesn’t insist that we aren’t strangers.

But I continue.

“The… mob. The ones who aren’t you. They came for us, six months ago after they found out that my… biological dad apparently did really care about us. Burned our house down. My mom, she almost died,” I whisper.

Alexei doesn’t move.

“My parents weren’t together. I was the product of a one-night stand. But evidently my bio dad, he was… helping. He sent us money. He helped get me into school. He cared about us enough that we could be used against him.”

“And so when he offered to marry you off…”

I shrug. “I agreed. Because you’re the bigger monster. Right?” I raise my eyebrow.

Alexei’s face darkens. “I am.”

“Well. I figured I could face a big monster if it meant my mom could be safe.”

“Are you safe?”

I look at him.

“I heard you speak of your mother. Your father. Your desire to make sure that she is safe. But what about you? Did you not think yourself safe?”

“Well, I kind of figured the man who spent my whole life watching over my mom and me from afar wouldn’t completely screw me over.”

“You trusted a man you barely knew?”

Well, I guess when he says it like that… “Yeah. I guess I did.”

“Magdalena.”

I look up.

Alexei moves. I’m sitting on an overly stiff couch, and before I realize it,he’s within about six inches of me. I lean back, keeping my eyes trained on his, as he looms over me.

“I am the bigger monster. Your father did not lead you astray.”

“Okay,” I whisper.

Something seems to flit across his face. He steps back, looking out the window to the snow falling outside.

“You are my wife now. You will live in Orlov House. If you’d like… we can send for your mother.”

I blink.

“I am a monster. You must remember this.”

“Alexei…”

He flinches.

I take a deep breath. “I know why I agreed to this. But why did you?”

He turns.

“If you’re the one people are afraid of, then why did you agree to marry me? What do you get out of it?”

I’m genuinely curious. He’s so hellbent on being seen as someone harsh, and cruel, but I’ve seen the way Elena frets over him.

I’ve seen how much she cares.

Elena is a nice person, and she wouldn’t invest so much into a man who was truly a monster.

Alexei looks at me.

“There’s no point in lying. I was honest with you. Might as well be honest with me too,” I point out.

Alexei’s perfect lips twitch again. “Fair point.”

He shifts, so that he’s sitting next to me. The couch is stiff as a board, and it doesn’t give at all as Alexei sinks into it.

“My family is old,” he begins.

I raise an eyebrow. “Elena called you a prince.”

He nods. “In the oldest sense. The land, this house, they have been part of it for generations. I cannot inherit the house without a family. Without a wife,” he says meaningfully.

Ah. “That’s old school.”

His lips tip again. “Old school,” he murmurs, like he’s never heard the phrase before. “Yes. Well. That is the case. I needed a wife, and I do not… this was a very easy way to get one.”

“Don’t date much?”

Alexei shakes his head. “No.”

Well. That’s interesting, at least.

Still, I had hoped that he was… I don’t know. Interested in me, somehow.

That it wasn’t quite as sanitized as it seems.

“I won’t hurt you, Magdalena. I will protect you. I will protect your mother. I will keep you safe. Orlov House, the land, the staff… they are yours. We can keep your mother here. Any… I can give you money, and clothes, and anything you want, it will be yours.”

“And if what I wanted was a loving family? A happy husband?”

Alexei looks away.

“Got it,” I murmur.

“I will not promise something I cannot give,” he says softly.

Well. At least he’s being honest.

I stand.

“Where are you going?” Alexei asks.

Turning, I look back at him.

“Does it matter?”

“Elena will return. She wished to bring us cake.”

That earns a little smile from me. “And you don’t want to disappoint Elena, do you?”

Alexei nods. “She is… hopeful.”

“For what?”

“That I am not the monster that I am.”

Interesting. “And you want to give her hope, but not me?”

Alexei frowns.

I sigh, and settle back onto the couch.

Alexei looks at me. “What are you doing?”

“I like Elena. I appreciate your honesty. So I’ll happily eat cake with her and pretend. What about you?”

Alexei takes a deep breath. I can smell his cologne, spicy and vaguely citrus against my senses.

“For Elena, we can pretend.”

The next morning, Alexei is gone.

I pretend it doesn’t bother me. Elena lets me know that he’s gone back to Novgorod for business.

He left me a black credit card, which I know from my general understanding of the world is the type without a limit.

Well, at least he wasn’t kidding about the money stuff.

I spend the morning making the best of my unlimited money. Elena gives me the shipping address for the house, and I type it in so many times, it’s basically memorized by the time I’m ready to talk to my mom.

When her face pops up on my screen, I do my best to smile.

However, she is still my mom, and the second she sees me her eyebrows pinch with worry.

“Oh, baby. What’s wrong?”

Tears pinch the corners of my eyes.

I could tell her. I could explain everything, and let her know that I’m sad and lonely and nothing really seems right.

But…

I don’t want her to worry.

“Oh, nothing. Just dusty in here and I’ve been sneezing a lot.”

“You sure?”

I nod.

“Ok. Well, tell me everything.”

I break a smile.

And then I lie through my teeth.

I tell my mom that we’re planning a wedding later, and that she can come. I say that Alexei is kind, and thoughtful, and that he took me shopping. I tell her about Elena (which is true) and that the house is fantastic (also true). By the end of my story, I’m out of breath and half in love with the life that I’ve been describing to her.

It sounds lovely.

“Oh sweetheart. That sounds amazing. I can’t wait to meet him!”

“I can’t wait either,” I say, my jaw clicking around the lie.

“So, what are you two doing for Christmas?”

I squeeze my eyes shut. “Oh, you know. Decorating soon, but since it’s the first holiday I’m in the house and in Russia, I want to do like… Russian things.”

“Well that sounds fun, sweetheart. I can’t wait to see what you come up with.”

“How’s… um… dad?” I stumble. It feels weird to call him that but… technically he is my dad.

A blush creeps across my mom’s cheeks. “Well, it turns out that I remembered your father to be a very nice man and… he’s still a very nice man.”

“Mom!” I say, genuinely smiling.

“It’s been nice to reconnect, that’s all.”

Gross. “I don’t know what you mean by that, and I don’t want to.”

My mom laughs. “I’m so happy you’re doing well, sweetie. You know, maybe there’s a silver lining to all this.”

“Like what?”

She smiles. “Like, maybe we were meant to find these very nice men.”

Oh god.

My heart crumples. “Hey mom, I gotta go.”

“Okay. Love you, sweetie. Send me pictures of your decorating.”

“I will.”

I hang up the call, then stand up. I trot down from my room, making the long trek to the kitchen.

Elena is humming to herself, and I knock softly.

“Yes?”

“Are there any Christmas decorations in this house?” I ask.

Elena’s eyes glint with something that’s a little mischievous. “Why do you ask?”

Resolve grips me. “I’m the lady of the house now, right?”

“Yes you are, dochka.”

I give her a nod. “Then I’d say, it’s time to get this house Christmas-ready.”