7. Aiden

Chapter 7

Aiden

T here was only so much a man could take before he lost it.

And I'd fucking lost it.

I had a good time on my date with Celeste. There was never an awkward moment or a lull in the conversation. It all went great, and when I dropped her off, I hadn't asked to kiss her. She'd told me to text her later, and then we both leaned in, and that was that.

A kiss.

A simple, chaste kiss.

Afterward, she got out of my car, walked into her apartment, and I texted Meredith.

Which is how I found myself here because despite all her protests, I did know her. I knew how Meredith liked to talk a big game about her so-called constitution and play up her don't-give-a-shit attitude part, but that's all it was. Playacting.

A girl didn't tell you she was getting drunk by herself to be left alone.

I wasn't a goddamn idiot. Of course, I went right to her.

Which I guess made it an idiot.

Because as soon as I saw her, I knew I wouldn't be able to leave her tonight with my sanity intact. Not with how the hem of her dark green dress rode up her thighs, those mile longs legs crossed and propped up on the rung of the stool. Not with how her fingers and those long nails scraped through her hair, toying with her delicate earlobe before tucking the honey strands behind her shoulder. The bored, slightly impatient expression on her face, as if waiting for something.

Waiting for me .

It was starting to feel that way over the last couple of weeks.

She was building me up to be this suave guy, when really she was making me into the guy for her.

And, hell, it was working.

I wanted to be the guy who picked her up, who made her smile, who listened while she talked about school and work and the exact right color of grey to wear, or whatever the hell she wanted.

I wanted inside of her pretty head.

I wanted her.

So, yes, I kissed her.

She wouldn't stop going on and on about the stupid kiss with Celeste, and it was the only way to shut her up. To finally get my mouth on hers, comb my hand into her hair, holding the back of her head at the angle I wanted so I could lick into her mouth. She tasted of grapefruit and vodka and felt like everything good in the world. Her soft hair in my fingers, her plush lips moving against mine, her lush breasts against my chest, and the gentle indent of her waist under my palm. Every single part of her was heaven.

Until she let out a low moan. Then it was hell.

My dick instantly hardened, and I dug my fingertips into her a little harder, pulling us even closer. I couldn't get enough. Especially when she laced her fingers into my hair, holding me to her, so I was forced to drop my both of my hands to her lower back. We were bound together, from chest to thighs, every glorious curve of her pressed against me, and my electrons reorganized. New cells created a new me.

This one only for Meredith.

Here she was, supposed to be making me over for some other girl. Yet, here I was, being remade for her .

I pulled away first, lungs burning and skin on fire. Meredith sagged against the car, her eyes dark and hooded, lips parted, breath coming fast. The sight of her mussed up and dazed from our kiss tightened a knot in my chest. I wasn't the only one being remade.

"Well," she started licking her lips, and I bent toward her again, needing another taste, but before I could, she stopped me with a hand to my chest, right over my collar. "That was…"

"Amazing," I finished for her, gripping her sides more firmly as I kissed the corner of her mouth, dragged the tip of my nose along her cheekbone, wisps of her hair, catching on my glasses, and she breathed out a laugh, reaching her fingers up to disentangle us.

"It was good, yeah," she said, quietly, almost…unimpressed.

But that couldn't be right.

She must have felt it, too. The way the entire world rotated on a new axis, terrifying and thrilling all at once.

But when I backed away a few inches, she refused to meet my gaze. Instead, she rolled the length of her hair over her fist a few times, focusing her attention to the side as she cleared her throat.

I fixed my glasses and plucked at my shirt. It was cool out. The sun had set, but I might as well have been on the surface of the sun for how my insides boiled.

"It was good?" I asked after a while, literally dying in her silence. "That's all you have to say?"

This woman was never quiet, but now she refused to speak?

She nodded and slowly turned to face me, her eyes lingering somewhere around my throat. "Yeah. It was good." At the shake of my head, she amended, " Really good."

"So, why won't you look at me?"

"I was… That was unexpected."

"Bad or good unexpected?"

She finally lifted her gaze to mine, hitting me with such a look of exasperation, I should've been knocked on my ass. I would've been if I wasn't already. "God, Aiden. You need me to spell it out for you? Write it on a sign?"

"Might be nice, yeah."

She folded her arms, and the sight of her in my jacket formed a lump in my throat. "You're awfully full of yourself right now, for somebody who isn't closing on their date."

And just like that, she brought me back down to earth.

I stepped away from her and rubbed my palm down my cheek and over my mouth before tugging at the ends of my hair at the nape of my neck. Where her fingernails had been scratching mere moments ago.

"That's where you should be right now," she said, then took a moment to breathe deeply, as if she needed it to get the rest out.

I sure as shit did.

"You should be with Celeste, kissing her like that."

I shoved my hands into the pockets of my pants, afraid to grab her and kiss her again. Knowing that I couldn't hear anymore of her lies about what she supposedly wanted or thought she needed.

"So, how was the date?" she asked, her voice back to normal. As if this was some stupid tutoring session.

"Good." When she raised her brow, I gave the answer she'd given me. " Really good."

"Yeah?" She nodded a few times. "That's great. Really great."

"Mm-hmm." I kicked at loose macadam. "She's exactly the type of girl everyone expects me to be with."

"Yeah. She's perfect for you," Meredith agreed, toying with her necklace.

"Yep."

We stared at each other, nodding, like two idiots who didn't just experience a like-altering kiss.

But I wasn't the one in denial.

She was.

"You and Celeste have a connection." She forced a smile so fake it made my molars grind. "Obviously."

"Obviously," I echoed.

"You should definitely explore that. See where it leads."

"Yeah. Of course." If for no other reason than to let this brilliant woman stew in her own dumb ideas.

"When you go out with her again, kiss her like…like you kissed me, and…" She licked her lips, gaze darting all over the place. "You'll definitely be out of the friend-zone. So far past it, you won't even be able to see it."

The very idea of kissing someone who wasn't Meredith made my stomach ache, but I wasn't going to push it. Not tonight. Not when my head was fogged up with the memory of her in my arms.

But she could give me all the direction she wanted. Didn't mean I had to follow it.

She'd been throwing up defenses to her heart for a long time, certainly longer than I'd known her. It wasn't possible to break them down in the few times we'd been together, let alone with one kiss.

But I was patient. I was willing.

She deserved that. Of the man who ultimately made it through, she deserved to have someone who wanted to do the heavy lifting, who broke down every brick she built up.

I was proud of her strength.

Even if I did find it maddening.

"Come on," I said, walking around to the passenger side of my car. "I'll take you home."

She followed silently and slid into the seat, keeping her face forward after I closed the door on her. But when I dropped behind the steering wheel, she immediately helped herself to tuning the Bluetooth to her cell phone, cueing up her music.

Like this was her car.

Like she owned it.

Hell.

She could if she wanted to.

She could own me, too.

We didn't speak on the ride back to her apartment, which was fine with me. She stewed while I kept my need to fix at bay. Meredith didn't need fixing or putting together like a puzzle. She needed time and space to figure out what I already did.

She was the person I wanted.

Maybe she had been for a long time.

It was hard to tell because whenever I'd ever been in her presence; she was all I had seen. Like an eclipse, she was greater than the sun. There was nothing else around her, and I never thought I could actually harness all that energy. Keep it for myself.

But now I knew better. She needed someone like me. Someone who may or may not be too dumb to take on all of her.

Sure, I was smart.

Smart enough to know when I was beat.

And she had me. Claws dug in deep.

At her condo, I walked her inside and up to her door, even though she fought me the whole way.

Because, of course.

I wouldn't want her any other way.

She unlocked her door, glancing over her shoulder at me, leaning against the jamb. "Thanks for taking me home. I could've found my own way."

"I know."

"You barged in on my solo date. Sort of ruined it."

"Sorry."

She clucked her tongue. "No, you're not."

"No, I'm not."

"Unit four: don't show your cards too early," she told me with an arched brow, then stalked into her place, not glancing back or inviting me in. Simply shut the door in my face.

I rubbed at my jaw, staring at the place she'd stood, waiting.

I knew she wouldn't backtrack. That's not something Meredith did. She made her decision and followed through. I admired that about her. She followed her gut.

Something I was learning by being with her lately. To follow my gut.

And mine told me not to give up so easily.