6

Mabel

I was not happy that I had to arrive to the palace without Ian, and the moment I was shown to a room with the king and almost two dozen men I did not know without Ian there, I swore I would never do it again… Especially since the queen was not there either, nor any other woman.

"Countess, welcome," the king greeted warmly.

I could not even hide my upset but tried to smile and greeted him with a curtsey. "Thank you, Your Majesty."

"There is much to discuss, but these healers are going to scan you first."

I let out a slow breath and glanced around the room and met his gaze, letting him see how disappointed I was in him. "No." I ignored when a few people gasped, but one man snorted, the man with a piercing gaze and who looked too amused.

He blinked at me. "I beg your pardon?"

"Your Majesty, the one thing I asked is you not make me look the fool with all the posturing," I said firmly before gesturing to all the men there. "And not to be surrounded by men I do not know."

He cleared his throat. "You said yelling men."

I sighed. "Fine, but do I not even deserve the respect of being introduced to these people? I refuse to be treated like a mare—" I shot a nasty look at the amused man when he snorted. "Tell me that you would allow your sister, daughter, or wife to be treated this way and I will feel sorry for them… I assume, Your Majesty, from the way you are dressed."

He lost his amusement fast and looked away.

"Shall I tell them that you were party to or demanded this of a woman who was—"

"Oh, he threatened war if it did not happen," one of the other men I assumed to be a leader from their attire said.

"For the love of sanity," I sighed, focusing back on the king. "Please find yours, Your Majesty. This is over the lines we discussed. If you do not understand that, please understand you will end up divorced if the queen finds out you did this when she was not in the room." He opened his mouth, but I was not done yet. "And Ian will do something you both regret."

He bristled at that and then frowned. "I truly do not understand. You are the most humble noble I have ever met. You do not cause problems. What does it matter if healers examine you?"

I saw that he truly did not understand, and more than that, he was exhausted. "My King, what would you do if strange men demanded your wife be examined by strange healers, and another man not only allowed it, but agreed, said it should be done. You would lose your mind." I felt better when he winced.

"Rightfully so," the nicer king muttered.

I nodded. "I am a citizen, I have rights. I am not a mare anyone can inspect. Nor land to evaluate. I understand how complicated it all becomes, especially when there is the insanity of war being thrown around so lightly over—it will not get better after that, and we both know it. You see this as a minor concession, but it's too much to ask. I am not anyone's but mine."

He swallowed loudly and glanced at the door and then back at me, realizing how badly he'd acted.

I nodded. I curtseyed to him again. "Greetings, Your Majesty. Thank you for inviting me, but I am uncomfortable in this meeting without the grand duke and queen given my situation."

The look of thanks he gave me healed me a bit. "Of course, Countess." He looked towards the door. "Find the queen and Ian immediately. Have a maid step in so the countess has another female presence until they arrive."

I nodded that would be fine. Then I turned to the nice king and smiled, hinting the king could at least be polite. Seriously, he could really be a dolt without the queen.

"Countess Mabel Phoenix, this is King Alkian of Canter," the king introduced.

I curtseyed. "It's my honor, Your Majesty."

"It's my honor to meet the saint," he replied, clearly seeing when I flinched. "Why does my referring to you as that upset you?"

I swallowed loudly and looked at the king, glad when he nodded before focusing back on King Alkian. "It's a bit hard to believe when it has not been… Confirmed? I am not sure that is the right word, but the temple is corrupt. It feels a bit self-important to accept that title?" I sighed and did not hide my frustration. "I do not know what I am."

"I appreciate your honesty," he said after a moment. "For the record, I said if Gerald's healers scanned you, I would accept their assessments."

Because they were friends. I could tell that. I slowly nodded, glancing around at the others. "But the word of your healers would go a long way since you would be considered more unbiased."

His eyes flashed shock. "Yes, probably."

I nodded. "Then once the queen and Ian are here, I am fine if your healers want to scan me, Your Majesty." I looked at the king as if to say "See, was that not easy?" I was glad when he accepted it. But then I frowned. "Why? I apologize, but why do they want to scan me?"

The man with the intense gaze held up a hand to the king of Canter. "You cannot think of a reason?"

I met his gaze head-on and raised an eyebrow. "I can think of many, but given it's my body, I believe I have a right to know. Would you not ask, Your Majesty?"

He gave a slight nod. "I would. It's your brain damage." He winced when I flinched and the two other kings gave him unfriendly looks. "I apologize, the injuries to your brain."

I swallowed loudly. "That the healers and doctor said if I injure my brain and am knocked unconscious one more time, I probably will not wake again. That is what you speak of, yes?" I sighed when he nodded. "I have to visit or there's war or something?" I felt better when the King of Canter snorted. "And if I do not want to visit? Do I get a vote?"

He studied me a minute. "Of course, you would want to visit. You would be treated and praised as—"

"As well as you have already treated me?" I pushed back, raising an eyebrow. "And I do not want praise and my name shouted, Your Majesty. That makes me uncomfortable."

He frowned. "I cannot understand that."

I shrugged. I opened my mouth but then closed it, looking at the king again. He introduced us, and this was the King of Telrai who we were enemies with, and the threat of war had loomed too often the past five years.

Goddess help us. I swallowed loudly and could not hide the fear I felt when the king told me that.

I tried to shake myself out of that and focused on the conversation. "I believe you are married, Your Majesty." I waited until he nodded. "Do you have any idea how uncomfortable these formal gowns are? How long they take to get into and prepare to wear? How long I have to sit still to make my hair look like this? Makeup applied? It's ghastly."

His eyes went wide and he burst out laughing, a few others chuckling with him. "Yes, my wife does say the same after every royal event."

"I hate it," I admitted. "I hate feeling like I am walking on eggshells. I hate being in this room and my stomach upset and the headache I feel coming. I would rather be mixing herbs and trying to put together something to help people. I hate posturing and saying one thing while meaning something else."

Relief filled me when Ian came bursting through the door with the queen hot on his trail. He shot Gerald a look that he would kill him, but then was at my side.

"I was surprised that you did not meet me when I arrived," I said quietly as if everyone could not hear me.

"I was excused because I was apparently being a pain and tried to intercept you," he bit out.

"Well, the king immediately called for you when I said I was uncomfortable and then admitted he overreacted," I lied through my teeth, realizing the mistake when Ian flinched. Whoops. I gave him a look that it was fine, pursing my lips at him.

He let out a slow breath and gave me a quick peck, ignoring who we were around. I looked at the queen and let her see it was okay, but clearly she was going to give the king an earful later.

Good, but their marriage shouldn't end over it.

"The countess was just telling me that she hates formal events," the King of Telrai said. He frowned when others flinched. "She said being called the saint made her uncomfortable."

"I did, thank you for adjusting for me," I accepted. "Now, if you could take back the threats of war, we could have a civilized and respectful evening maybe?"

The queen gave me a shocked look like she could not believe I'd said that.

I could not believe war was so easily being thrown around.

So we were all a bit crazy it seemed.

"Alright, I can admit I was a bit rash and over the top since Gerald did as well," he accepted.

"Thank you, Your Majesty." I smiled at Ian. "Now that you are here, I can be introduced to the rest of everyone."

I was, and it was hard not to lose my temper, understanding why Ian was so miffed.

I cut in before anything else could be said. "So you three are just messengers, not nobles or ministers or… Anything?" I glanced between them waiting for a response.

Ian slowly looked at me like he'd never seen me before and probably wanted to reach out and touch my forehead to see if I had a fever.

I let out a slow breath and met his gaze. "The pope wanted to force me to be his wife. The high priest tried to kill me. A king threatened war. Yes, I am ready to explode." I gestured to the three men. "They are nobody. Not nobles. Not ministers. Their leaders sent them to mean offense. I am not stupid. They sent nobody aides and demanded I be examined like a mare."

I felt much better when the queen gave an elegant snort, clearly agreeing with me. Good.

I focused back on the envoys. "Go back and tell your leaders that I am insulted. The saint is insulted. Apparently, there is only one of me, and people are willing to go to war over me and they have insulted me. Unbelievable. Not even the littlest bit of manners or decorum to send a relative or minister or…" I shook my head and moved over to the side where I could sit down.

"Mabel?" Ian whispered as he followed after me.

"I will yell all night. I have hit my limit, Ian," I admitted. "And now my head hurts." I glanced at the men standing near the other kings. "I assume two of you are the healers to scan me?" I waited until I saw two nod. "Fine, you can, but I know what that feels like. If you try anything else, I will tell the grand duke, and he will take your head. Just so we all understand."

"You yelled at me for threatening war," the King of Telrai reminded me.

"And if someone used power on you that you did not agree to or—"

"I would take their head," he sighed.

"Thank you for being honest, Your Majesty," I said.

"You will only check her for what we discussed," he ordered the man of his party. "You do anything else, and I will allow the grand duke to take your head."

"Yes, My King," the man agreed. He came over to me and bowed. "With your permission, Countess?"

I rubbed my head as I sat down. "Yes, please, let's just get this over with." I extended my arm to him. I felt his power move over me, it was stronger than I'd felt before and he did it longer, but it was what other healers had done.

"I am very, very sorry for what you have suffered, Countess Phoenix," he rasped when he was done, his eyes watery.

"That bad?" I whispered, worried at what he saw. "You are more powerful than the king's healer. I felt it."

He swallowed loudly. "I felt it as well when I shook hands with them. And yes, you need to be healed, Countess. Someone with holy power needs to heal you. Even with a low level to help your brain stabilize better. The cracks in your skull are not… They have healed but not settled. Even a hit to your head that does not knock you out could be your end."

"What?" the queen gasped, the king swearing under his breath.

"Oh boy," I whispered. "I guess I should have been a bit selfish and asked the goddess for more than how to heal my scars. Wow." I nodded. "Thank you for being honest."

"We have just as poor of a relationship with the temple as you do, Gerald," the king grumbled. "Bastards." He was quiet a moment. "You cannot help heal her if you are stronger than his healers?"

"It is not that kind of healing," the healer admitted. "It's more like scar tissue that needs to be healed so the last wound can have a chance to heal properly. I cannot heal that, no magic besides holy power can."

"Then I will fucking drag a priest here and make them do it!" Ian bellowed.

I looked at him and saw tears were running down his cheeks, completely destroyed. I reached out my hand to him. "We will figure something out. You cannot do to some priest what the pope wanted to do to me. You are not that man. I would not love that man."

"Healing you is not forcing you to marry and raping you," he argued before kneeling down and kissing my hand. "I need you, lovely. You cannot leave me. I know I should say the world needs you, but I do."

"I need you too," I whispered. "We know now, and your smart mind will think of something. You always bulldoze ahead and think of a plan." I raised our joined hands and kissed his this time. "You are my knight who rescued me that day and so many times since. You will this time too."

"I do not deserve your faith after I let the high priest take you."

I ran my hand over his hair and gave the king a worried look, but he was focused on Ian and looked just as worried. I glanced over at the King of Telrai. "So I cannot travel."

Pity was in his eyes. "No, certainly not."

The other healer checked me as well. He was not as powerful as the first but did confirm what was said. The envoys were shocked that I truly denied their healers. I gave them the looks they deserved and shot back that I allowed them in the room for the exams with the other healers, which was kinder than their leaders had been to me.

So to go back with that and make it clear that I was insulted, and I would pray to the goddess that night to tell her they insulted her saint. I felt stupid saying it, but it was time to start flexing my strength a little that way… Since apparently, I had to.

We finished up with that and then it was time for dinner, but I had a question first, trying to pull the queen to the side but failing at it. "When do I give gifts?"

"Gifts?" she asked.

I frowned at her. "Royalty came here to meet me. Am I not supposed to give gifts? I would think—I would have a spread laid out when you came to visit me. I—"

"I love gifts," King Alkian chuckled. "Normally, I have to bring them."

"Yes, of course, Your Majesty, but because you visited King Gerald. You came to meet me though, and I did not travel to you." I gave Ian a panicked look.

"You really are too sweet," he said gently. "No, you did not have to prepare gifts, lovely."

"Well, now we know about them," the King of Telrai chuckled.

I looked at my king and did not hide my embarrassment. Luckily, he waved it off. I asked the knights who'd come with me to bring them from the carriage. "I apologize for the packaging. I am not promoting my business, but—you understand the problems with distribution."

"The temple is corrupt and so are doctors," King Alkian said, his voice tight. "Half of the medicinal stores in our nation are a huge problem or con. Yes, I fully understand, and from what Gerald has said, you pay your employees above-average wages and are generous. I think that is worthy of the saint much more than the damn temples."

"I agree," the King of Telrai muttered. "And we have heard about the headache tubes and arthritis cream. My queen demanded we make peace so my mother will stop complaining in her ear all of the time so she could get it for her."

"If only things could ever be that simple," my king whispered.

"No, but this is the first decent conversation we have had in many, many years," he said after a moment. "I think we have been so busy yelling at each other through envoys and idiots that we were both prideful asses who needed a face-to-face. And we both let who came to whom and crazy, as the countess said, let take priority."

"It all compounds so fast, and I let it happen too," I said quickly. "I blink and I am underwater, and I do not have the lives of millions or a kingdom on my shoulders." I smiled at the king. "But I will always tell you to stop the crazy anytime you wish, Your Majesty."

"It's one of her best qualities," Ian promised.

I was glad when they were amused by that.

I gave out the gifts of products from my store. While we had the first course, I told them that there was more, but I was always worried about what they could be used for. King Alkian apologized but asked about how the goddess communicated with me and my other "qualifications" to be saint.

I told them. I had no reason not to, but I also admitted that it was hard for me to think I was a saint since the temple was not to be trusted.

They discussed it all and even the products. It was a fine conversation, and they praised me for how I handled it all. I listened as they talked about how fascinating it all was and how lucky I was to be so blessed.

I listened to it all and all the possibilities as laughter bubbled in my throat… And finally bubbled over.

I apologized and tried to stop, but the more I did the more I kept laughing. Finally, I got myself under control and realized Ian was rubbing my back and everyone was staring at me with a bit of fear.

"I apologize, profusely," I whispered, wiping under my eyes. "Truly, but it is so hard." I wiped my eyes again. "I have been receiving dreams of a flower. A damn flower and impending doom. Not the name of the flower, just the flower in nature and waking with a headache and dread like I might die."

"Mabel," Ian whispered.

A giggle slipped out as I looked at King Alkian. "Do you have any idea how difficult that is? Not only to think that you are crazy, but it comes from the goddess with a point? To call a sketch artist to help you draw your dream to find this flower. Then to get the plant, and the goddess tells you to grow them. A lot of them. Why?

"I have no idea. But it's important. Very important. Dire. And she keeps reminding me of this and where I can get more. Or showing me more in nature like I will drive there and pick them all. And last night, she showed me that I have to learn a very specific and bizarre way to distill these flowers to extract essence from them. For what? I have no idea. But I have to.

"And apparently, it is very easy to mess up. The heat has to be low. It cannot be for too long, and not much comes from each flower. So you cannot leave it. And I need a lot of this. For what? I have no idea. But it will be dire. And this is only the first step. And I cannot not listen to the goddess. So this is my life as a puppet. And it hurts my head that might kill me one day."

"It is a lot," the queen whispered. "It's very difficult some days."

I met her gaze and admitted what I'd been feeling lately. "Some days, I wish I had not survived my ex-husband's abuse." I hung my head in shame as tears burned in my eyes. "I apologize for laughing at your hope and positive words about my being a saint. I appreciate you speaking well of me, but I am struggling. It is very difficult."

"Yes, clearly, it is," King Alkian whispered. "You have no clue what… Plague. There is a plague coming."

"I do not know, but why else show me in dreams if she gives me the way to make medicine?" I rasped. "And what if I fail? What if I cannot save these people?"

"You never fail," Ian comforted. "We will figure it out, lovely. We found the plants now and we will grow the flowers. Now you know the next step and we will have chemists help."

The king cleared his throat. "I do not think the timing is a coincidence, Mabel. You sit before the man who has the flower in abundance all over his kingdom."

"Oh, that's convenient," the King of Telrai chuckled.

"Not you," the queen purred.

"Me?" King Alkian checked.

"It's the Canter bellflower," King Gerald confirmed. "The flower is too delicate to travel here, but if we have the way to extract whatever she needs from it—we can figure out a price or how to handle this. I will do whatever I have to so my people are saved from plague."

I flinched and raised my head, my face going pale. "I apologize, Your Majesty, I did not mean to imply…"

"What?" He studied me closely. "You said you were not sure. I know that. I understand that and will not blame you. It is a feeling."

"Yes, but it's not in Areca," I whispered. I nodded when they all gasped. "It will not be here. It feels far. I do not know. I am sorry, I thought I articulated that. But again, I have no idea. I was saying I was worried because plague travels, but I do not think the outbreak will be here."

"While better than being in Areca, it's still horrid," the queen whispered. "I wonder where it will be?"

I wondered the same.

And I was the one who was supposed to cure it.