Chapter 10

Lucas

Morning sunlight streamed in through the window, casting golden rays upon my bed, rousing me from slumber slowly. Stretching languidly, I yawned widely, blinking blearily against the brightness invading the room. Another day began, another routine ready to unfold.

Yet today felt... different. Off somehow. Not quite right. As if my body anticipated changes looming ahead. What kind of changes those were going to be, I had no idea.

Shrugging off the blankets, I swung my legs over the edge of the mattress, planting my bare feet onto the cool hardwood floor. A shiver ran down my spine, goosebumps prickling my flesh despite the warmth permeating the air. Weird. Never happened this early before.

Padding towards the en suite bathroom, I paused mid-step, frowning at the sudden wave of nausea crashing over me. What the hell? Grabbing onto the doorframe, I leaned heavily, panting through clenched teeth until the sensation passed. Jesus Christ, where did that come from?

Stumbling inside, I braced myself against the countertop, staring intently into the mirror above the sink. Dark circles hung heavy beneath my eyes, accentuating their usual size, which was weird because sleep wasn't a problem for me. Pale skin stretched taut across my cheekbones, emphasizing the sharp angles usually softened by my youthful fullness. I looked gaunt, almost sickly. When did that begin to happen? No idea, I thought.

Water splashed loudly as I cupped handfuls beneath the tap, bringing them up to splash against my face. Cold shocked my system for a moment, jolting my senses awake. Better. Now, maybe I could think straight again.

But instead of clarity, confusion reigned supreme. Because now, my stomach churned violently, threatening rebellion. Bile rose bitterly, burning my throat raw. Fuck! How could I possibly throw up without warning signs beforehand? It never happened like this!

Rushing back into the bedroom, I barely made it to the wastebasket beside my bed before emptying the contents. Violent retching racked my frame, tears streaming freely down my cheeks. Goddamn, what was happening here?

Once done, I collapsed weakly onto the floor, gasping for breath, wiping the sweat from my brow. My body felt alien suddenly, foreign, and unpredictable. Like someone else inhabited my skin, controlled my organs, and dictated my actions. Scary thought, really.

Minutes ticked by agonizingly slow, each second stretching interminably while I lay there, boneless, spent, and exhausted. Eventually, strength returned, allowing me to drag myself upright once more. Shaky limbs protested vehemently, muscles aching as if worked rigorously overnight. Strange. I hadn't exercised recently enough for soreness to set in so severely.

Dressing proved challenging, requiring effort far exceeding normal tasks. Clothes seemed heavier, bulkier, and unwieldy. Even simple acts like buttoning a shirt or tying a shoelace demanded concentration, patience, and perseverance. All things lacking currently.

Breakfast wafted up from downstairs, a normal morning's temptation turned to torment. One whiff sent nausea crashing through me, my knees buckling as my stomach revolted. Food was impossible—every scent a fresh wave of misery.

I retreated upstairs and curled up on the couch, clutching pillows against my chest, seeking refuge in familiar surroundings. But peace eluded me as anxiety gnawed at my core. Something fundamental had shifted overnight, but I couldn't grasp what had changed—or why.

Thoughts drifted towards my parents then, memories of childhood mornings spent together flooding my consciousness. Mom always prepared elaborate breakfasts, insisting everyone needed proper sustenance before starting the daily grind. Dad joined us occasionally, sharing stories from past adventures, and encouraging dreams for future endeavors. They were good times, filled with laughter, love, hope...

Hope. That word echoed hollowly within my chest cavity, mocking me cruelly. Hope for what exactly? Normalcy? Stability? Happiness? Things long abandoned, discarded, and forgotten. Or perhaps not entirely forgotten, but certainly misplaced, lost somewhere along the winding path leading here.

Desperation clawed at my insides then, urgency burning hotter than anger ever could. They fought me tooth and nail, argued relentlessly, and pleaded shamelessly. All to keep us apart, drive a wedge between us, sever ties binding our hearts.

Their reasons made sense logically, rationally even. Age gap, danger, reputation—valid concerns any parent would raise when faced with such circumstances. But they failed to grasp one crucial fact—we weren't just some fleeting fling, temporary tryst. No, ours ran deeper, stronger, fiercer. Ours defied explanation, logic, and reason. Ours transcended boundaries set by society, expectations imposed by others, rules dictated by convention.

I tried explaining, arguing, and pleading. Begged them to understand, accept, and support. To see beyond surface appearances, look past societal norms, and peer beneath masks worn for protection. To trust me, believe in me, stand beside me. But they refused stubbornly, as I knew they would.

College offered temporary escape, promising independence, freedom, and growth. Yet, even that illusion crumbled under the weight of expectations. Now, nothing remained except remnants of shattered dreams, and echoes of broken promises. And me—Lucas Chen, omega son of a prominent family, a student at a prestigious university, and lover of art history—trapped amidst the ruins of my former self, struggling to find footing anew.

Kessia's face flashed briefly behind my closed eyelids, her smile warm, comforting, and reassuring. She knew me better than anyone else and accepted me fully despite my flaws. With her around, life seemed bearable, manageable, and tolerable. Without her... well, who knows where I would be right now and what I would be doing?

And then, thoughts turned inevitably towards him—Marco Rossi. Alpha cartel leader and dangerous criminal. My lover. Protector. Savior. A confusing mix of contradictions wrapped neatly in one complex individual. One man capable of both destruction and creation, violence and tenderness, brutality and compassion. One man who challenged everything I believed about myself, my world, and my place within it.

His name alone sent shivers running down my spine, igniting nerves alight, and stirring emotions deep within my core. Love. Fear. Longing. Desire. Need. So many feelings tangled together, impossible to untangle, separate, and distinguish clearly. Yet all centered around him, revolved because of him, and which existed solely due to his presence.

He changed everything, yet left much unchanged too. Changed how I perceived myself, my worth, and my value. Left intact my beliefs about my family, friendship, and loyalty. Taught lessons about power, control, and dominance. Showed truths hidden beneath layers of deceit, lies, and illusions. Made me question everything previously taken for granted.

Yet still, he remained an enigma wrapped in riddles, secrets buried deep beneath layers of mystery. A puzzle I yearned desperately to solve, piece by piece. Until finally, the complete picture emerged clear, vivid, and undeniable.

But today, none of those thoughts mattered. Today, only physical discomfort held precedence, demanding attention, and commanding focus. My body rebelled against my usual routine, rejecting norms established over the years. As if preparing for something monumental, something life-altering, something irreversible.

Pregnancy. The word whispered softly through my mind, barely audible yet resonating loudly nonetheless. Impossible, surely. Unlikely, definitely. Yet, I couldn't shake off the lingering doubt, the persistent suspicion, the nagging uncertainty. What if? What if this weirdness stemmed from something more profound, more significant, more permanent?

No. I couldn't think straight anymore. Hormones played tricks on my brain, clouding my judgment, and muddling my thoughts. Better rest, relax, and recover first before attempting rationalization later. Maybe then clarity would return, revealing answers hidden within shadows cast by confusion.

For now, though, I'd simply lie here, basking in the warmth radiating from the sun-kissed cushions, letting time pass leisurely until my body settled naturally into rhythm again.

Days passed slowly, each one blurring into another as I struggled to maintain normalcy while grappling with suspicions growing in my mind. Symptoms persisted, intensifying every day, leaving no room for denial or dismissal. Something was happening within me; something fundamental, life-altering, irrevocable.

Finally, after days spent in turmoil, I caved, purchasing a pregnancy test online, arranging delivery far from prying eyes. Couldn't risk Kessia finding out, raising alarm bells prematurely. Not when I wasn't sure myself yet. She popped up here sometimes.

When the package arrived, tucked safely between textbooks and notebooks, I hurried upstairs, locking the bathroom door securely behind me. My hands trembled slightly as I tore open the box, pulling out the slender stick with trembling fingers. Ridiculous really, considering how calm I usually remained under pressure. But then again, nothing about this situation felt remotely familiar.

Following the instructions, I placed the tip against my stream, holding my breath as seconds ticked interminably. The positive result appeared quicker than I wanted, clear and unmistakable even under dim lighting. Shock ricocheted through me, stealing my breath. Pregnant. Me. An omega male. Carrying a child. Jesus Christ, how did this happen?

But I knew how it happened. It shouldn't be a surprise.

Emotions surged, crashing over me like waves upon a storm-tossed shore. Surprise, shock, fear, joy—they all collided, threatening to drown me. How could I possibly feel so many things without drowning under their collective weight?

Then came acceptance, slow but steady, seeping into every fiber of my being. This was real. No more hiding behind ignorance, denying truth staring plainly back at me. I was going to be a father. To someone else's child. Or rather, our child. Mine and Marco's.

News needed breaking gently. Especially since he lived such a volatile lifestyle, teetering on the edge of danger. Who knew how he'd react once informed? Would he accept the responsibility readily, and embrace parenthood with no doubts? Or crumble under pressure, retreat into darkness threatening his world already?

Fear gnawed at my insides, worry clawing at my resolve. Did I truly want to bring an innocent life into the chaos ruling our existence? Into violence, brutality, instability? Was it fair to impose such conditions on another living soul?

Before I could delve deeper into the doubts plaguing my mind, footsteps echoed heavily outside the bathroom door, pausing briefly before resuming pace. Shit! Someone approached, someone who wouldn't hesitate to knock down barriers separating us. Marco. Had to be him. Nobody else moved like that, commanded presence so effortlessly.

Panicking, I threw the test into the trash can hastily, covering it with wadded-up tissues just as a knock sounded sharply against the wood. My heart pounded violently against my ribcage, threatening to escape any moment now. Calm down, breathe deeply, and act normal. You've got this, I coached myself sternly, taking steadying breaths before calling out weakly,"Yes?"

The door creaked open tentatively, revealing Marco standing tall in the doorway, his gaze sweeping over the scene unfolding before him. His expression darkened, suspicion flaring hotter than anger ever could. Fuck. Caught red-handed. Literally.

"What were you doing?"He demanded, advancing further into the room, crowding my personal space. Goddammit, why did he have to tower over me like that? Intimidating, yes. Scary too. Yet also... thrilling somehow. Inappropriate reaction, definitely.

"Nothing,"I lied smoothly, turning away, pretending nonchalance."Just... cleaning up."

His brow furrowed, disbelief evident in those expressive features. Good. Let him doubt himself instead of me for once. Better than facing interrogation otherwise.

"You're lying,"he stated firmly, crossing his arms across his chest. The accusation hung heavy amidst the statement, weighing down each word until guilt crushed me entirely. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. Story of my life.

"No, I’m not," I shot back instantly, shaking my head. Too late, I recognized the crack in my armor—my defensiveness exposing my vulnerability. A rookie mistake, obvious and damning.

He stepped closer still, close enough for the heat radiating off him, wrapping around me protectively despite the tension stretching taut between us. Close enough for scent marking me, claiming me utterly despite the lack of physical contact. Close enough for fear to rise swiftly, choking off rational thought entirely.

"My Lucas..."he murmured softly, his voice dropping lower, resonating ominously within the confined space. My Lucas? He never said that before? When did ownership become implicit in tone, inherent in timbre?

"I'm fine,"I assured quickly, stepping back, escaping the proximity threatening my control. His hand reached out reflexively, grasping mine tightly, halting my retreat. Trapped.

"We need to talk,"he announced suddenly, releasing hold reluctantly, giving me space to breathe again. Thank god for small mercies.

"Yes,"I agreed, eyeing him. Talk meant questions, answers, and truths laid bare. All things I dreaded sharing right now. Not because I didn't trust him; quite the opposite, actually. Because I trusted him fully. And knowing him, knowing what he'd do once told...

But first, distractions. Anything to delay the inevitable confrontation looming ahead.

"Can we go downstairs first?"I suggested, gesturing vaguely towards the exit."I haven't had breakfast yet."Lie. I hadn't eaten anything substantial days ago. Fear had choked my appetite, leaving no room for sustenance.

He hesitated, considering the offer silently before nodding sharply."Fine. But later..."

Later. Yes, I heard him loud and clear. Later meant explanations, revelations, and confessions. Later meant truths spilling forth unrestrained, consequences following closely behind.

Yet, for now, later remained distant, undefined, and uncertain. Now focused solely on evading detection, concealing secrets, and maintaining the status quo. For however long possible, whatever cost necessary.