Chapter Thirty-Eight

LUCA

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 17TH, 2023

F inley’s naked body is tangled in my bed sheets, the sun shining through the window, illuminating her porcelain skin as she snoozes softly. Her raven-colored hair is a wavy mess on my pillows since she went to bed with it still wet from our shower, and she has sleep lines on one of her round cheeks from her slumber.

I can’t believe she stayed.

I thought I’d fucked it all up for sure last night after I killed that fucker downstairs, but my anger just took over. I was blinded with rage that anyone would think they could take her from me, and he was so smug about it. The knife was going into his stomach repeatedly before I could even blink twice. When the cloud of red lifted from my eyes, I realized what I’d done.

It clicked, set in stone, when she looked at me and it wasn’t a look of horror. Or one of fear. It was none of those things I was so fucking scared I would see when I looked at her. She looked at me, and she didn’t see a monster. She saw… Fuck, I don’t know what she saw, but I’m really glad she did.

I have no idea what it means to love someone, but I do know I’ve never felt like this about any other person on this planet. My heart reacts to her every word, every reaction, every movement she makes. It swelled seeing her ride me last night like that, and not just because of the sex. It was in that moment, I knew I’d rip my heart out of my chest if she asked me to.

It’s hers.

I love her.

Although, she could wake up this morning and come to her senses. Having a night to sleep on it, maybe she’ll wake up screaming and run away. Even after telling me she loves me, I wouldn’t blame her if she wanted to go.

But I can’t dwell on it now, because there’s a decaying body downstairs that will start to stink up my house soon if I don’t get rid of it.

After detangling myself from Finley’s warm body, I sneak downstairs to get started on clean-up duty. All my supplies are in the basement, so I start there and haul everything back upstairs, grimacing at the blood that has now turned black after sitting all night. Unraveling the plastic wrap, I curse under my breath as I grab the fucker by the feet and drag him over. His dead weight is nothing to me, but his intestines spilling from his gut isn’t necessarily pleasant.

Blood is such a bitch.

It takes forever to clean up. It stains everything—which sucks, considering I have hardwood floors. Why did I do this here? Why did I have to snap like that? If I had kept my cool, I would’ve taken him to the basement and done it there, where I could easily clean it up.

After a few hours, I’ve cleaned it up as best as I can, but there are parts of the wood that are stained. Fuck .

I’m glaring down at the stains like they’ll just disappear suddenly when Finley emerges on the staircase, wrapped in the sheet from my bed. I hold my breath as I watch her descend the stairs toward me, clutching the blanket tightly to her chest as she looks from me to the body wrapped in plastic, swallowing thickly.

She’s so fucking beautiful. Her bedhead and sleepy eyes have my heart in a vicelike grip, and I realize this might be the last time I see her like this. She could leave right now. As she reaches me, I even close my eyes for a moment to soak this in.

“Do you need help?”

My eyes flash open as I gawk down at her. That’s not at all what I was expecting to come from her mouth.

“Finley,” I whisper, shaking my head. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything. I don’t want you to feel like you can’t…leave. If you want to.”

“Why would I leave?”

I would speak, but I don’t know what to say. My brows furrow as I study her softly, observing the way she looks at me just the same. Her green eyes are softer than they’ve been in a whole week. I didn’t know if she’d ever look at me so gently again.

Finley lifts her hand to cup my cheek. “I’m a part of this now. You had to do this because of me. I’m not just going to leave.”

“You don’t have to be a part of this .”

“I’ve seen you,” she murmurs. “The good parts. The scary parts. And I’ve decided I don’t want to leave. I want to stay, and I want to help you figure this out. I want this to end. I-I want you to be free .”

“You shouldn’t worry about me, Princesa .” I clear my throat, hoping I don’t sound as choked up as I feel. “You should worry about you.”

“You’re worrying about me enough, so I think I’m okay.” She smiles feebly up at me, and I can’t help but relax at seeing that again. “But someone needs to worry about you too.”

I’ve never really believed in fate, but I think she blew into my life for a reason. Maybe the only real way I would be able to be free myself from this life is because of her. I can’t imagine how things would’ve worked out otherwise.

“I thought for sure I ruined everything last night.”

She wraps one arm around my waist, pressing her face into my chest as she holds onto the sheet with the other.

“I thought you’d go running out of that door,” I continue. “But you didn’t.”

“Does that make me stupid?” she whispers.

“Maybe.”

Her shoulders shake faintly, and I worry I’ve just upset her, but as I grasp her face to make her look up at me, I realize she’s not crying. She’s laughing . Tiny snickers leave her lips that turn into full-blown guffaws as she clamps a hand over her mouth in an attempt to contain them. I chuckle softly as I frown curiously down at her, and my concerned expression only makes her laugh more. This continues for a few seconds before she shakes her head, as if that’ll make the giggles disappear, and sucks in a deep breath.

“So,” she exhales in a huff. “What can I do?”

I need to get this body down to the basement, where I have an…oven. I have an oven to burn any evidence, but I’m scared to tell her that. Then again, how much worse can it get? I already killed him in front of her.

“We need to get him to the basement.”

Nodding, she swallows. “Okay. And…what exactly is in the basement?”

She’s being so strong; I can see it in her eyes, mixed with the haze of uncertainty. I fear she’s trying to take on too much at once, that she might still break if she has to see it all in a matter of twenty-four hours.

“Everything we need to make him disappear,” I say lowly.

Her chest heaves in an unsteady manner. “Okay.”

“You don’t have to help me with this,” I urge, putting my hands on her shoulders like that’ll get my point across better. “I can do it. You can take a shower or make some coffee.”

“While you’re dealing with a dead guy?” She quirks a brow. “I’m sorry, but that’s not going to help me relax at all.”

“What you’ll see down there won’t help you relax either.”

It’s a messy process. The oven isn’t big enough to hold an entire person inside, so the body has to be dismembered in order to fit. I’ll have to remove his limbs and sever him in half completely just to get him in the damn thing. I’m not sure she could handle that, not with the way she could barely handle the sight of her own blood the first night I met her.

I don’t know how she didn’t pass out last night, but maybe she was in too much shock for it to really bother her.

Finley sighs anxiously, tilting her head up at me in a sympathetic manner before placing a hand on my face. “How do you do this? How are you okay after this? This is so heavy, Luca. Are you…okay?”

“Are you?” I rasp.

“ Luca ,” she pleads. “I’m serious.”

“This is what I know how to do. I disassociate. I compartmentalize. You don’t. I don’t care about me right now, Finn. I care about you. You’re being supportive, and I love you for it, but I’m scared you’re going to crumble any minute now.”

Her face softens. “Finn.”

I blink slowly as I frown.

“You called me Finn.”

“I did,” I say.

“I’m not going to crumble.” She sounds certain of it. “Whatever happens now, we’re in this together. You…murdered a man last night. A few weeks ago, I probably would’ve had a stroke or something, but now?”

I watch her carefully as she searches for the right words.

“You killed him for me. You’re doing all of this for me.”

Fuck , she’s trying so hard. She’s going against every fiber of who she is to try and prove to me she can handle this, but I’d never ask that of her. I’ve changed enough of her life as it is; I don’t want to push it any further. There’s no possible way I can let her into that basement on good conscience.

Leaning down, I press a chaste kiss to her lips. “I know you want to help in any way you can, Princesa , but this is me asking you to stay up here. If this is the one and only time you ever listen to me, that’s okay. Just, please ?”

She seems unsure at first, but as she studies my face for a few moments, whatever she sees is enough to convince her. Putting her hand on my chest, her thumb rubs back and forth.

“Okay, I’ll stay here.”

Thank fucking God .

I wait until she pads back up the stairs out of sight before I walk over toward the basement door, prop it open as wide as it’ll go, and grasp onto the fucker’s ankles to tug him down the concrete steps. The plastic wrap is loud as hell on the way down, and each step is a reminder that I’m so close to being done with this bullshit forever.

Two hundred and four .

So fucking close.