71. Olivia

Chapter seventy-one

Olivia

T he next month of planning is busy beyond anything I could have anticipated. As soon as Victor and I announced we were getting married, Ansley announced she was making my wedding dress. I was nervous that she wouldn’t be able to get it completed in time, but she worked on it day and night. I told her something simple was okay because anything extravagant would have been too much work.

Ansley being Ansley said she had to put my personality into it. So, all the girls are at her new boutique, so I can do my final try on. Ansley provided the champagne, and Caroline made a charcuterie board for all of us to snack on. Victor has been even more protective since we got engaged, so Ansley had to push him out of the boutique and lock the door.

“It’s bad luck to see the bride in her wedding dress. So, if you must stay, you’ll have to stay outside.” He shook his head, but heeded her warning. Because let’s face it, no one wants to piss off Ansley. Leo and Arden are now standing at the door like they’re guarding the freaking president. The guys came and got Victor along with Malachi and James to do guy things. At least, that’s what Connor said.

I told them as long as it didn’t involve naked women, that was fine with me. Every single one of the girls agreed. Loudly. Ansley threatened to remove Lincoln’s dick. Ansley stands behind me and zips up the dress. Her hands come to her mouth, her eyes shining with unshed tears.

“Liv, you look stunning.”

I stare at myself in the mirror in shock and awe. Running my finger along the lace covering my collarbone, I’ve never felt more beautiful.. “Ansley.” My voice is hushed. I look at her through the mirror. She walks closer and wraps her arms around my shoulders, placing her chin on my shoulder.

“I told you I would do my best to make everything perfect.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. Through all the fittings, she has become acquainted with the scars on my body. I began to open up and tell her the stories behind them. Some of the stories made her cry. Others made her angry. But she never made me feel less.

The dress is a three-quarter sleeve A-cut. The lace sleeves have what looks like leaves scattered up to my shoulder, then going down the fitted bodice. As the dress gets to where it flares out, there are flowers sewn onto the lace all the way down to the hem of the dress and down the train. Ansley puts her hands in the pockets of the dress, and I laugh.

“You did it!” I exclaim. That was the only thing I requested. I allowed her to have complete creativity, but all I wanted was pockets. Trying to turn to give her a hug, I get caught up in all the fabric. She laughs and comes around so I’m able to hug her. “This is more than I ever expected. It’s absolutely perfect.” We separate and I stare at her. “Ansley, I don’t like that I’m not paying you for this.”

She scowls at me. “Olivia.” She drops her voice and I scowl right back at her.

“Only Victor can pull that off.”

She laughs and I smirk at her. “Look, you know the money problems I was having. The fact I can do this and not be scared I won’t eat next week is exhilarating. So, please, let me do this.” She gives me a pleading look and I nod slowly. “Besides, the website looks amazing, and the app is coming along really nicely. Let’s just say we’re even.”

“Alright. Victor keeps telling me I need to let people take care of me, but it’s hard,” I tell her.

Betsy insisted on catering the reception and Caroline wants to do the snacks while people are waiting. Betsy is getting paid, but Caroline will only let us pay for what she needs to get. She won’t let us pay her. Bec is helping with the decorations and Bailey is doing anything that requires calligraphy or some kind of painting.

“We all love you, hon. More than I think you realize. We’re doing for you what you would do for any of us.” My eyes begin to burn.

“What is taking so long?!” Bailey yells.

“Yeah, we want to see!” Bec says.

“The calvary is calling,” Ansley says and rubs her hands together. “You scoot behind the door so they can’t see you when I open it, then you come out when I tell you.”

“Okay,” I whisper, and she arches an eyebrow at me.

“Don’t start crying. If you start crying, I’ll start crying and Caroline will definitely start crying.”

“Hey, I heard that!” Caroline says, but Bailey and Bec are loudly agreeing.

I laugh and shake my head as I move to where Ansley tells me. She walks out and I close my eyes, taking in this moment. I’ve never been happier in my life. I have an amazing fiancé and friends. Two things I never thought I’d have.

“Come on, they’re impatiently waiting,” Ansley says.

I chuckle and step from behind the door and walk out into the boutique. I’m greeted with oohs and aahs, then Caroline does start crying.

Bailey smiles at me. “Liv, you look breathtaking.”

Bec brings me a glass of champagne as Ansley fills up everyone’s empty glasses. “Cheers to you,” Bec says. We all clink our glasses and take a drink. The other girls sip theirs, but I drink all of mine. Caroline arches an eyebrow at me, but I shrug.

“I’m trying to catch up with all of you,” I tell her and she laughs. She walks over and hugs me tightly.

“You are going to be the most beautiful bride ever,” she whispers. I hug her back, my eyes burning again. It seems like since that wall has been torn down, I’m becoming more like Caroline.

“Alright, let’s get you out of this dress, then we can eat,” Ansley says. She helps me get out of the dress and leaves me so I can put my clothes back on. When I come out, Bec offers me a plate she made me.

“Thank you. I’m starving.” I dip a cracker in some cheese and hum. “Caroline, when you’re ready, I’ll help you create a website,” I tell her.

She gives me a small smile. “I’ll let you know.”

I study her for a few seconds. “Are you okay?”

With everything going on, we haven’t had any girl time in a while. I did talk to her earlier this week about mine and Victor’s relationship. She understood and accepted it a lot better than I expected.

“What? Of course!” The way she replies, I know she isn’t being honest. Bailey wraps her arm around Caroline and gives a slight shake of her head.

“Care?” Ansley asks.

Caroline waves her hand at us. “What I’m going through is nothing compared to what’s happening right now,” she says.

I step forward and put my hand on her forearm. “Hey, don’t do that. How you’re feeling is valid and what you’re going through is valid. It doesn’t matter if it looks smaller than what other people are going through. If it’s big to you, then it’s big to us.”

She blinks, and a tear falls down her cheek. “I've been having a hard time since Mia was born,” she says. “The doctor says it’s postpartum depression, so he prescribed me something to help. I started taking it earlier this week. It takes about a week or so for it to start working.”

When I was telling her about me and Victor’s relationship and what would be happening at the ceremony, she was going through this. “Care, you know you can talk to us.” I glance around the circle we’ve all formed at each person. “That goes for all of you. It doesn’t matter what any of us are going through, we’ll always be there for each other no matter what,” I say.

Caroline flicks at a tear and nods. “You’re right. Of course you are. If any one of you were going through this and didn’t talk to us about it, I would think the same thing.” She shrugs. “It’s just hard sometimes when it’s me.”

Ansley wraps her arm around Caroline’s waist and mine, so I wrap mine around Bec’s and she wraps her arm around Bailey. “Let’s all make a vow now that we’ll talk to each other. Life is changing very quickly, but you are my tribe and that is never going to change,” Ansley says.

By this point, we’re all crying. “I kept secrets for so long. I don’t want to do that anymore,” I tell them.

Caroline smiles at me and I know she’s about to change the subject before she does it. “Don’t you have something to tell us?” she asks.

Everyone’s eyes light up and I nod. We all take a seat. The boutique has a couch and several comfortable chairs. I sit in one of the chairs as we all begin eating again and Ansley refills our champagne glasses. I’m grateful Leo will be driving me home because, with how generous Ansley is being, I’m already beginning to feel tipsy.

“I’ve already told Caroline, and I did talk to Ansley about some of this a while ago, but I wanted to tell you all.” Everyone is looking at me with anticipation and grins. “Victor and I,” I swallow and take a deep breath. Talking about this one on one is easier than in a group. “We’re in a Dominant/submissive relationship. We have been for several months now. It’s helped me overcome a lot of trauma from living with Donovan. At the wedding, he’s going to give me a collar. In the BDSM community, it’s as important as a wedding ring. For some, it’s more important.”

I pause and look at everyone. They all have smiles. I exhale, realizing how nervous I was. “I wanted to tell you all because I want you to know how important it is. We won’t do anything other than after we exchange rings, the priest will say that Victor has a wedding gift for me and he’ll put it on me. There will be people there that are in the lifestyle, so they’ll understand. But there will be people there that will think it’s just a wedding gift.” Bec and Bailey exchange a look. “What?” I ask.

Bec leans forward and from the growing smile on her face, I have an idea of what she’s going to say. “You know Connor is going to insist on throwing you two a BDSM party.” I throw my head back and laugh.

“And I’m dressing up as a penis again,” Bailey says with a clap of her hands.

“Julian is going to love that.” Caroline rolls her eyes and we all start laughing.

“Lincoln was right; we are all a little kinky,” Ansley says and we all nod in agreement. As if on cue, there are knocks on the boutique door. Ansley stands, walks to the door to unlock it, and the guys all file in. Leo and Arden come in too and stand at the door. I smile at them, appreciative that because of them I felt safe tonight and was able to relax.

Victor walks over to me and wraps his arm around my shoulders, kissing me on the forehead. I can tell by the glazed look in his eyes that he’s had quite a bit to drink too. Malachi is also with them, so Victor introduces him to all the girls.

“Hey Bec, did you hear?” Connor asks loudly. I share a look with Victor already knowing where this is headed. “We’re hosting another BDSM party.” I throw my head back, laughing. Victor shakes his head, but he’s smiling. Julian rolls his eyes.

“And I get to wear the penis costume again,” Bailey says. Julian’s eyes snap to hers.

Leo walks over excitedly, standing on the other side of me. He bumps his shoulder into mine. “I am coming to this BDSM party. Arden will have to do security that day.”

“Hell yeah,” Connor says. “The more the merrier.”

“I’m scared to ask, but what’s a BDSM party?” Malachi asks.

“Burgers, Drinks, and Salsa Music, baby!” Connor exclaims.

Bass shakes his head. “I know you didn’t drink that much. I was watching.”

“You know he doesn’t need alcohol to make him like this,” Julian deadpans.

“Yeah, I wish I hadn’t asked,” Malachi says.

My cheeks hurt from smiling so much, but my heart has never been fuller.