50. Olivia

Chapter fifty

Olivia

O bviously I missed something while Victor and I were in the bathroom because it looks like Julian and Bass made a bet of some kind and Caroline is stealing the money Bass won from Julian. Ansley comes and stands next to me, crossing her arms over her chest and popping her hip out.

“So, Connor and Bec are officially a couple. Bass told Julian they would announce it today, and he won fifty bucks. Caroline stole it for the baby.” She fills me in real quick. I glance at her and she winks at me, glancing at Victor quickly, but doesn’t say anything. I mouth thank you to her for not asking questions and continue watching the chaos unfolding in front of me with a smile on my face.

Bass steals the money back from Caroline and holds it above his head. She tries to grab it but gives up quickly, a pained look crossing her face so quickly I’m not sure if I imagined it.

“I give up. I’m about to pop.” She walks over to the couch and plops down, then groans. “I’m never going to be able to get up.”

We all start laughing, and she grins as she settles back, but she grimaces again as she tries to get comfortable. Her hand rubs over her stomach and I look away, knowing I’ll never get to experience that. Victor’s large hand rests on the small of my back like he knows the emotions rolling through me right now.

“Just rest. I’ll make your plate,” Ansley says. When Caroline starts crying, I turn to look at her and can’t help but smile. “Oh, dear lord,” Ansley cries out as everyone starts laughing.

“I’m fine. I’m fine,” Caroline says through her tears.

I shake my head and have to walk away. Though I’m really happy for her, watching her experience all the things I’ll never get to has probably been one of the hardest things for me. I feel so selfish for feeling this way. Victor is right behind me and I don’t know if he’s going to start asking questions or not. As astute as he is, I’m surprised he hasn’t put it together yet.

I know I’m being unjustifiably angry at him for not putting it together, but that’s easier than having to tell him. Victor stands next to me in the hallway, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me close. He kisses the top of my head.

“How are you doing?” he asks.

I shrug. “I don’t know. It’s a relief the truth is finally coming out, but there’s still so much more to tell.” Sighing, I look up at him.

“You’re not alone. And every single one of these people loves you. Even those who have only known you for a short time. How could they not?” He leans down and kisses my nose, then gives me an encouraging smile. I lean my head on his bicep, having the urge to tell him again how much I love him.

When I see Bec head into the kitchen, I glance at Victor.

“Go on then,” he encourages.

I follow her and step up next to her before wrapping my arms around her.

“Thank you for keeping my secret,” I whisper.

She turns to me. “Of course. I um… I told him when he was in a coma. After I told him I felt like such a jerk. I told him a dumb dad’s joke when he was in a coma, too, and he told it back to me. I was so nervous he would remember me telling him that, but obviously, he didn’t.” She looks so remorseful.

I pat her arm. “It’s okay.”

She shakes her head. “It’s not. Even if he was in a coma, I should have kept it to myself.”

I hug her. “You two have a special bond. It’s understandable wanting to tell him something like that.” I didn’t understand that before, but I do get it now. Glancing back at Victor, suddenly feeling the need to tell him about why I can’t get pregnant.

“Thank you for not being pissed at me. I think you are one of the kindest souls I’ve ever met. I’m so sorry Donovan is your stepfather.”

I exhale, not sure if I should laugh or not. “Yeah. Me too, honestly.” Glancing around the room, taking in all the changes since the last time we were all here. The paint color is different and the furniture in the living room is updated. It doesn‘t look like a bachelor pad anymore.

“You really should consider going into interior design. This place is beautiful. So different from the last time we were all here,” I tell her.

She smiles, her cheeks turning pink. “I still have a ways to go, but I did have a lot of fun painting the living room.”

Connor walks up behind her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into this chest. “Yeah, she did.”

Her face turns a bright red, and she smacks his arm. “Connor!”

I smile at them both, forcing myself not to look at Victor. For some reason, I feel very insecure today. He’s here for me, but no one knows why he’s here.

Connor slaps Bec on the ass. “Go make yourself a plate.” Bec grabs my hand and pulls me toward the food. I stop thinking about Victor and focus on Bec.

“Did he mean what I think he meant?” I ask her.

She covers her face with her hands. “Yes. We had so much paint in many weird places after that.”

Ansley stops by us with a grin on her face. “Seems like you two are just as kinky as the rest of us.” Bec looks around the room, her face a bright red. I have to force myself not to look at Victor.

What is their definition of kinky? What would they say if they knew Victor picked out my clothes every day? Or if they knew I called him Sir? What would they say if they knew I signed a contract with him? What would they say if they knew he was my Dom, but not my boyfriend?

I have to swallow the lump of emotion that swells in my chest and force myself to pay attention to everyone’s banter. Victor cares about me, but I don’t know if it’s a forever thing. Everyone begins to talk about their sexual escapades and I really want to get as far away as possible. I can’t share mine because I’m unsure if I’m allowed to share mine.

Heat hits my back, and I know Victor is standing right behind me. But I don’t know if it’s because he can tell I’m on the verge of screaming, or if this is his way of staking ownership. I need to know; I have to know. I can’t keep trying to figure this part of our relationship out.

Stepping up next to Bec, I grab a paper plate, but Victor takes it from me and his fingers brush mine. My cheeks turn pink as my heart beats hard in my chest. This is probably his way of trying to get my attention. But I can’t look at him right now. If I do, he’ll be able to read me like he always does and I can’t deal with that right now.

Victor leans down, letting his mouth brush my ear. “I’ll hold the plates; you can fill them.” His voice has dropped an octave and I nearly melt into the floor. I give him a small smile and load our plates, allowing him to tell me what to put on each of them. Once everyone has settled around the table and finished eating the majority of their food, Connor turns to Victor.

“So, what are we going to do about Donovan?”