40. Olivia

Chapter forty

Olivia

I ’ve been avoiding Victor, which is hard when he has two security guards following me around and the fact he’s my Dom. I huff and swallow down the lump of emotion that has been present in my throat since Friday night. He’s sent me a good morning text every day and asked me to send him a picture of the outfit he chose for me. When he dropped me off at my house on Sunday afternoon, he chose all my outfits for the week.

Monday morning I was so hurt and mad I hung them all up, then pushed them to the back of my closet. I haven’t worn anything he picked out all week. It’s Friday, and he hasn’t said anything about me not sending him pictures, which pisses me off.

He’s my Dom. I’m his sub and I’m being disobedient. Isn’t he supposed to punish me or something?

There’s a knock on my office door. “Come in,” I reply. Forcing myself to get it together. Caroline opens the door and enters. I smile at her. She’s glowing.

“Hey,” she greets me and closes the door behind her. She sits in a chair across from my desk.

“Hi. How are you feeling?” I ask her.

She scrunches her nose. “Like a Beluga whale.”

I laugh and shake my head at her. “Well, you’re a very pretty Beluga whale.”

She smirks at me and takes a deep breath. “Are you busy? I can leave. I just needed a break, and I wanted to check on you.” She leans back in the chair and sighs.

“No, I’m not busy. I’m kind of waiting for five o’clock. And I’m fine. Why did you want to check on me?” I ask her.

Caroline stares at me and it actually makes me a little nervous, like she sees all my secrets. “Liv, you know I love you. Right?”

I open and close my mouth a few times, surprised. “Yes. I love you too.”

She bites her bottom lip and looks out my office window for a few seconds.

“When I first became friends with you and Ansley, I was self absorbed. I had been isolated for so long and I know that’s not an excuse, but it was a self defense tactic, I think. If I looked out for myself and didn’t care for others, I couldn’t get hurt. You know?”

She looks back at me. I nod, not sure what she’s getting at, but I do understand what she means more than she probably realizes.

“And now,” her voice cracks slightly. She cries easily these days. “Bailey and I are close again. She has Bec and I don’t think she’s ever had friends like she does now. Ansley is back from Atlanta.” She gives me a watery smile. “We’ve created this family, you know?”

Emotion wraps around my heart.

“Something is going on with you. I know you have secrets. It’s one of the reasons you don’t like to talk about yourself and it’s fine. I’m not here to push you to tell me anything you don’t want to. But I want you to know I’m your friend. Your sister by choice. I love you and if you ever need anything, I’m here. Okay?”

I nod, unable to speak right now. She caught me off guard and this week has been a rough one. I’ve been avoiding Victor, but it also feels like he’s avoiding me because he hasn’t eaten lunch with me like he normally does. For the first time since all of this started, I want to tell someone about this weird relationship we have, but don’t know how to explain it.

“I like Victor,” I finally say. “A lot.” I think I’m in love with him, but don’t say that.

Caroline tilts her head at me and smiles. “I’m pretty sure he likes you too.” I shrug one shoulder, not sure what to say. “He’ll come around. Just like Lincoln did.”

I nod. Part of me feels like this is the beginning of the end. I finally voiced to Victor that I wanted him to try, but he didn’t. Why didn’t he? For the first time in months, that ball of tension returns to my stomach.

It’s Friday. Does he want me to come over this weekend? Maybe it’s over and he’s trying to figure out a way to tell me. Caroline stands and walks around my desk to give me a hug before saying she has to go to the bathroom. The rest of the day, I replay every single moment that happened last weekend with Victor.

Walking out to the lobby at the end of the day, I have to hide my disappointment when I see Lane instead of Victor. “Hey, Liv. Victor had a slight hiccup at one of his construction sites. So, he had to go take care of it. He told me to take you home and he’ll let me know when he’s done so I can take you to the house.” I smile and nod.

Victor has his hand in so many pots it’s amazing he has time to do anything. He started out in construction. The guy he has running it now pretty much does it all, so Victor can focus on his restaurants. Occasionally he does have to go take care of things. As soon as we get to my house, I smile. I’ll go work in my garden while I wait. I still haven’t planted anything at Victor’s house.

He told me we’d go buy things for me to do it, but that was months ago and he still hasn’t done it. It’s one of the reasons I think all of this is probably temporary for him. Of course, I haven’t said anything. But he could have changed his mind. It is his house, after all. I change into jeans and a T-shirt. My phone vibrates right as I’m about to go outside. Connor’s name flashes on it. Why is he calling me?

“Hello?” I answer.

“Bailey has been attacked by some fucker that’s been stalking her,” he says in a way of greeting. My heart stops beating and I reach out to grab the counter so I don’t fall. I hear Caroline in the background crying. “Don’t go to her house, but I’m trying to call everyone to let them know.”

“W-what should I do?” I ask. My eyes dart around the kitchen. “I need to be there for Caroline.”

“Meet us at the hospital. I’m sure she’ll have to go there to get checked out.” He doesn’t wait for me to answer before hanging up. I lock the back door, grab my purse, and car keys, not thinking about Lane being in the car outside, then race to my car and back out of my driveway. My phone begins ringing.

“Hello?” I answer, not looking at the caller.

“Where the hell are you going?” Lane asks.

“My best friend’s sister was just attacked. I’m going to the hospital,” I tell him.

“Shit. I’ll follow you and let Victor know.”

Not responding, I hang up and force myself to do the speed limit on the way to the hospital.

Unlocking my front door, I motion for Bec to come in. She glances around and offers me a small smile. “You have a nice home,” she says.

“Thanks.” Tonight turned into something much worse than was expected. The guy that attacked Bailey was going to try to shoot her. Connor got there just as it was about to happen and jumped in front of her. He took the bullet. So, now they’re both in the hospital. Bailey woke up before we left. Connor, though, he’s in the ICU and hasn’t woken up yet.

Bec is not handling it well. Apparently, she’s loved him since she met him. They’re best friends, but nothing’s happened between the two of them. Not yet anyway. I’ve received a dozen texts from Victor, but haven’t answered any of them. I’m being a brat, but I’m so upset with him and hurt. Honestly, I just don’t want to talk to him right now. Maybe he’ll actually punish me for it.

Once I get Bec settled in the guest bedroom, I walk to my room and close the door, then lean against it. My phone vibrates again and I sigh. I lift it and swipe it open.

Victor: Call me. NOW.

I can hear his Dom voice through the text. He’s pissed, but for once I don’t care. Since we signed that damn contract, even before that, I have wanted to be so good for him. Eventually hoping more would happen. Was I scared? Yes. But I trust him. Looking at his text again, I can’t keep avoiding him. So, I press the green button next to his name. He answers before the first ring even finishes.

“Olivia,” he answers. He is not happy.

“Victor,” I reply back in the same tone.

“Why haven’t you been answering my texts?” His voice is a growl. He’s never sounded like that before talking to me.

“My friends were hurt, so I’ve been taking care of them,” I snap. “I’m sorry I didn’t come running.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

Swallowing down the turmoil that’s boiling inside of me. “I’ve had a bad week and an even worse day. So, if you don’t mind, I want to go take a shower and go to bed.” Before he can answer, I hang up. It’s the first time we’ve ever argued and I hate it. My phone buzzes in my hand again, but I hit ignore, then turn it off.

I try to roll over on my side, but can’t move. My eyes fly open and the small relief that I’m not blindfolded is stripped away when I see his dark shadow standing beside me. I swallow down the bile in my throat. He turns the lamp on next to my bed and I wish I were blindfolded. As I turn my head to look up at the ceiling, he grabs my face hard and turns me until I’m forced to look at him.

“Do you see what you do to me?” he asks like it’s my fault he can’t control himself.

I can’t take this anymore. It used to be once or twice a month, but it’s slowly becoming more and more. Now it’s almost every day. He climbs onto the bed and straddles me and I squeeze my eyes shut. His fingers tighten around my jaw.

“Open your fucking eyes,” he snarls.

When I don’t respond right away, he tightens his fingers so much my teeth cut into my cheek. I’m probably going to have bruises tomorrow, which will piss him off. He doesn’t like to leave bruises, but when he does, it’s always my fault. I finally open my eyes.

“I try to resist you, but…”

He looks down at himself. I refuse to look. He removes his hand from my face and moves so he can settle between my legs. He’s going to make it hurt this time.

“Please, don’t,” I whisper. Will this ever stop?

“No!” I sit up in bed, drenched in sweat, and pull my knees to my chest as I begin rocking back and forth. It’s been months since I’ve had one of those. Is it because of what’s going on with Victor? Or maybe because of what happened to Bailey? I put my head in my hands, my forehead slick with sweat.

“Liv?” My head pops up. I forgot Bec was here. “Are you okay?”

I suck in air and wipe at the sweat pouring from my brow. “I had a bad dream.” Bec walks to my bed. She sits down and reaches out her hand to touch me, but I scoot back. “Please don’t. I just need a minute.” Bec moves back to give me space, and she has no idea how much I appreciate it. Not just that she’s giving me space, but also that she’s not asking any questions.

After a few seconds, I raise my head and look at her. “I have bad dreams sometimes.” Not calling them what they really are unsure if she’ll understand or not. “They feel so real it takes me a little while to realize it was just a dream.”

She nods. “Do you have tea? I can make you some.”

“Yeah, that would be nice. Thank you.” She leaves and I grab my phone to turn it back on. It immediately begins buzzing with messages from Victor. Guilt seeps into my bones at how I acted earlier tonight. This was my punishment.

Victor: I don’t appreciate you hanging up on me Olivia.

Victor: Did you turn your phone off?

Victor: I’m sorry you had a bad week. And I’m sorry about what happened to your friends today, but you are in trouble and we will discuss this tomorrow. Lane will bring you to my house.

Reading each text, I feel worse and worse with each one. I fold my lips between my teeth.

Olivia: You hurt me. But I’m sorry for how I acted. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Or today, I guess, since it’s the middle of the night. I don’t wait to see if he responds. After I put on my purple silk robe that Victor bought me, I walk out to the kitchen and climb up onto the chair at the island. Bec sits a cup of tea in front of me.

“You’re probably wondering what that was about, huh?” I whisper.

I stare at my cup, not looking at her. The tears in my eyes may actually fall this time. Between what happened to Bailey, the dream, and the argument with Victor, my emotions are extremely heightened.

“Liv,” she says, and I finally look up at her.

Bec walks around the island and sits next to me. She slowly moves her hand toward me, reminding me of Victor. She places her hand on my forearm and her warmth comforts me.

“You don’t have to tell me about your dream unless you want to.”

I release a breath and relax. She leans toward me and hugs me. I hug her back, hard, needing the touch. She doesn’t move away until I do. Rubbing my hand down my face, I sigh.

“I’m sorry. I should be taking care of you. Not the other way around.”

She tilts her head at me. “But you are taking care of me. You let me stay at your house and have made sure I’ve eaten. You’ve been amazing. It’s okay to need other people and not just take care of them.”

I take a sip of my tea, giving me a moment to find my voice. Setting it down, I run my finger along the cup’s rim. “I learned a long time ago not to need anyone. Then Ansley came along and turned my world upside down.” I shake my head.

Bec takes a sip of her tea. “How did she do that?”

Running my hands down my robe, I sigh. Maybe it’s time to open up more. “I’ve never really had friends. Growing up, I was homeschooled; I even took online classes during college. When I finally left home and got a job, it was the first time I’d interacted with people my stepfather didn’t hire.” I take another sip of my tea. It’s the truth, even if I’m not telling her exactly what happened to me.

“Ansley found me crying in the bathroom at work and adopted me, so to speak.” That really didn’t happen, but it’s what Ansley tells people, and I don’t deny it. Besides, it makes me look less crazy if people think I do cry. “I tried my hardest to shake her, but she wasn’t having it. She became my first best friend, then Caroline came along. Now I have you and Bailey too. It’s wild to me how I went from a girl who couldn’t leave her house to someone who has all these friends with a great job and a house I love.”

“You couldn’t leave your house?” she asks. I take a shaky breath, realizing I revealed a little too much.

“Yeah, see, my stepfather was very controlling. I wasn’t allowed to do certain things that other girls my age were doing.” I swallow and play with the edge of my robe. Now that I’m talking, I feel like I can’t stop. “Ansley’s the only person I’ve told this to. I haven’t even told Caroline. It’s not something I like to talk about.” I’m not sure why I’m confiding in Bec, but ever since that day at the coffee shop I’ve felt a connection with her.

“You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.”

Lifting one shoulder. “I’ve kept parts of me hidden for so long, so I’m trying to learn to open up more, but I don’t want to talk about it anymore. It might give me another nightmare.” That might not happen, but it’s possible. In reality, I’m exhausted. This week has been draining.

“I have nightmares sometimes, too,” she says. I take another sip of my tea. “When I was seventeen, Connor saved my life.” Her voice cracks slightly, like she’s just now realizing he’s still in the hospital. I put my hand on hers, trying to offer her some comfort.

“How’d he do that?” I ask.

“He saved it more than once. The first time I met him and Bass, they were moving out of their college dorm. Connor said he left a box of snacks on the ramp to their U-Haul because he didn’t want to open the door and close it again. Well, I stole their snacks.” She chuckles.

I smile at the thought. “You stole their snacks?”

“Yeah. I was homeless and starving. My grandpa had been admitted to the hospital, and his house had foreclosed, so I had nowhere to stay. Not that I got along all that well with my grandpa. We fought like crazy, but he was the only family I had.” She sighs. “Anyway, two men were following me, and apparently, they were going to try to kidnap me and force me into human trafficking.”

I suck in a breath. “Do you know who the guys were?” I don’t like where this is going.

She shakes her head. “Connor said they were part of a crew, and they answered to someone higher on the totem pole. Since that night, Connor has worked his ass off trying to clean up this town by hiring people that could end up in that gang.”

Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. “So, what happened?” I ask.

“Well, I took their snacks and ran off. Connor threatened the guys and told them he’d kill them if anything happened to me. They got the couch they were moving loaded into the U-Haul, Bass drove it to their new apartment, and Connor searched the streets for me.” She smiles and shakes her head.

“He never found me because I was creeped out by the guys and wound up going to the address Bass gave me to their new apartment. When I arrived, Bass called Connor and told him I was sleeping on the couch. Of course, Connor refused. He took the couch, and I slept in his bed. I felt guilty as hell. I was awake and gone before they even woke up, though.”

Victor has wanted Connor’s help for so long because Connor has been responsible for cleaning up this town. Connor doesn’t like Victor because of his relationship with Donovan. “Do you happen to know who those guys answered to? Like, who was their boss?” I already know the answer. I know I do.

She narrows her eyes at me. “I found out later that their boss was Donovan Castiel, but Connor knew that all along.” I suck in a breath. “Why?”

I bring my hand up to my throat and look away from her. She almost became one of the women in Donovan’s clutches. Oh god. Now more than ever, I hope Connor pulls through this. “Please don’t hate me,” I whisper. Bec leans forward and gazes at me.

“I could never hate you, Liv.”

I finally look at her. Those are famous last words. “Donovan Castiel is my stepfather.”