15. Olivia

Chapter fifteen

Olivia

A fter attending the opening night at Victor’s pub by myself, I decided to bring Caroline and Ansley, while Ansley’s in town visiting. I’m not sure what’s happening between me and Victor, if anything, but he will be in my life, so I thought it would be a good idea to intertwine these two parts of my life slowly. It didn’t go very well. Victor seems to still be having issues with his staff and Lincoln showed up. I pull my lip between my teeth. That was me and Caroline’s fault, though. We told him where we were going to be because we thought Ansley would want to see him too. Apparently not.

We did wind up having a great time, but I could tell Ansley wasn’t her normal self after Lincoln showed up. She won’t talk about it though, and I’m not sure how much she wants me to push. I walk out of the bathroom and to the living room where Ansley is waiting. She’s staying with me this weekend before she goes back to Atlanta.

I always open my house to my friends since I was never allowed to have sleepovers growing up. I get nervous at times about having a night terror, and having to explain it, but I don’t let that stop me.

“Are you okay?” I ask Ansley. She’s pulling at a loose string on the blanket covering her.

She gives me a sad smile. “I don’t want to go back to Atlanta.”

I squint at her as I sit down. “Really? Do you not like it like you thought you would?”

She shakes her head and looks up at the ceiling. “I hate the hours and I have a coworker that gets on my nerves.” She sighs. “It’s not how I thought it would be.”

“I’m sure Lincoln would let you come back.”

She’s shaking her head before I finish my sentence. “There is no way I’m working for Lincoln ever again.” Ansley groans and puts her head in her hands. “It took everything I had tonight to walk away from him. I’m so pissed at him, but I still want him.”

I scoot close to her and wrap my arm around her shoulders. “He obviously wants you too.”

Ansley scoffs, but doesn’t raise her head. “He wants to fuck me. That’s all it is.”

“That’s not all it is, Ans,” I whisper.

She turns her head and looks at me. “He won’t tell my brother, and I’m not going to keep being a secret. As much as I want him, I’m worth more than that.”

“You are,” I agree. “But I know his feelings for you outweigh whatever it is that’s making him hold back from telling your brother. He’s going to come begging for your forgiveness. I just know it.”

She smiles and bumps her shoulder against mine. “Thanks, Liv.” She takes a deep breath. “So, what’s going on with you and Victor?”

I open my mouth and close it a few times, each time her smile grows wider. “Um, I don’t know. I’ve known him since I was ten.”

Ansley sits up and turns to face me completely. “What? He’s not—”

“No.” Ansley knows my stepfather abused me in some way. She doesn’t know the details, and she doesn’t know his name. I’ve never told anyone his name because of the reputation he has in this town, although I’m not sure if she’d know his name or not. Ansley grew up in the rich neighborhood. So she may not know anything about what he’s done in this city, but I’d rather not take the chance.

“Victor was friends with my real dad. He’s my godfather.”

Ansley’s eyes widen. “Really?” There isn’t any judgment in her eyes which makes my racing heart slow down slightly.

“But I haven’t seen him in years and after my mom married my stepfather, it stopped feeling like he was my godfather. Now he’s back in my life and I don’t know what to think.” I fall quiet and Ansley studies me for a few moments.

“Well, you don’t have to figure it all out right away. I know you’ve never been in a relationship, so this could be scary if it might be heading in that direction. Just take it one day at a time and see what happens. And if you need to talk, I’m here.”

I wrap my arms around her and hug her tight. She hugs me back. “Thank you, Ans.”

“Love you, Liv.”

“Love you, too.”

The next several weeks are so busy at work all I want to do when I get off is crawl into bed and sleep. Ansley isn’t speaking to Lincoln. So, Lincoln is putting everything into this project. I haven’t seen Victor since I went to the pub with Caroline and Ansley, but we have talked a few times and he texts me every morning and night.

I still don’t know how to feel about him. Going to the opening night of his pub was a big step for me because I try my best to be home before dark. After having lunch with him, he was constantly on my mind, so I took a chance in an attempt to support him. He mattered more than my fears and deep down I knew he would protect me, then he proved it by following me home since I stayed until the pub closed.

It’s strange how he knows what I need without me having to ask him. I was perfectly fine with him telling me to only have one drink. When he ordered my food for me and told me I had to try everything, it eased my anxieties and made me feel cared for. When I was done, and it was obvious I wasn’t going to eat or drink anything else, he could tell I didn’t want to leave, but I felt bad for taking a seat another paying customer could have.

He offered for me to stay in his office until they closed and he’d follow me or drive me home. The thought of not having my car at my house made me anxious, so I asked him to follow me. It didn’t seem to bother him at all. Almost like he enjoyed taking care of me. I swallow, remembering how close he was to me, how his thumb stroked my neck, and how he kept looking at my lips. The same butterflies that took flight in my stomach that night take flight again. I’ve never had the urge to touch someone, but I wanted to rub the palm of hand over his beard and see how it felt.

I almost did it, but retracted my hand at the last moment. He didn’t say anything, though. He didn’t force the situation. Out of everything that happened that night, that’s what stands out to me the most. Donovan took. He took what I didn’t give willingly. Victor is nothing like him, not that I thought he was, but when I saw him at that restaurant all those months ago, I was scared he could be. I’m so thankful I was wrong.

The phone on my desk rings, bringing me out of my deep thoughts and reminding me where I am. Inhaling slowly, I try to calm my anxious thoughts. I miss him. I want to see him again, but I don't know how to ask. What if he doesn’t want to see me? My phone rings again and I shake my head. Sitting up, I grab the receiver.

“This is Liv.” I put my free hand on my mouse and move it around until my computer wakes up.

“Liv, this is James.”

I cradle the phone between my ear and shoulder as I type in my password to unlock my computer. “Hey, James. What can I do for you?”

“There’s someone here to see you,” he replies.

I sit up, my spine ramrod straight. My heart drops to my stomach and my throat constricts. “Who?” I whisper. I focus on breathing so I don’t have a panic attack at work. Please don’t be him. Please don’t be him.

“It’s a surprise.”

My eyes begin to burn and I clench the phone so hard my hand hurts. “I don’t like surprises.” My voice is high pitched, but I don’t care. Not right now.

“Hold on a moment,” James says.

Does he not know who the person is? I’m so stupid. How did I expect to hide from him forever? I knew he’d find me. Oh god, what am I going to do?

“Hello, Olivia.”