14. Indy

Chapter 14

Indy

“Night, Bwaker,” Tinny says, as he lays her down on her bed. I help as she pulls the cover around her. His fingers run along the side of her face so gently, it doesn’t seem possible.

“Night, Kiddo. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay,” she says with a big yawn. He then leans down and kisses her forehead before straightening and looking back at me. He smiles, then heads out.

“You need anything, baby?” I ask, while I turn on her nightlight.

“Love you, Mommy,” she mumbles, her eyes already closing. I’m not sure she even heard my question.

“Goodnight, my sweet baby,” I whisper, kissing her forehead while letting my fingers sift through her hair. I straighten back up and notice that Breaker is still standing at the door, staring at me.

I walk toward him and as I get to the door he puts his hand on the small of my back and lets me walk in front of him. Once he pulls Tinny’s door closed, my heart picks up speed as he leans down to whisper into my ear. “Tell me you want me in your bed tonight, Doc.”

“Breaker,” I breathe, unable to say another word.

“Nothing happens you aren’t ready for, honey. You’re in charge here. I’ll be happy holding you like last night. I just don’t want to leave you.”

“I don’t want you to go anywhere either, Breaker. I’m just …”

“Just what, Doc?”

“It’s just so fast. I’m scared. I don’t think I’d survive another mistake.”

He turns me around gently so that I’m facing him. I feel like I can’t catch my breath. I know there are probably unshed tears shining in my eyes. I’m terrified of making the wrong decision. My daughter is getting attached to Breaker. What if keeping him around opens her up to pain? Considering the man that I picked to be her father broke her heart and mine, I can’t afford to make another mistake.

“Doc, I know there’s a lot unknown about me, and I may not remember my past, but I know from the top of my head to the soles of my feet that whatever happens between the two of us, it will never be a mistake.”

“I can’t dry my daughter’s tears because another man hurt her heart, Breaker. I just can’t do it, especially when I’m so attached to that man that I can’t think of anything but him most days.”

“Fuck, Indy,” he groans, sliding his hand against the side of my neck. His fingers curl around, making his hold even firmer, refusing to let me go. “Woman, trust me, whatever you’re feeling, I’m right there with you. You may not trust that but give me a chance and I’ll prove it.”

“Let’s go to bed.”

“Doc—”

“To sleep,” I warn him. I’m just not ready to take it farther.

“Lead the way.”

We hold hands as we walk into my bedroom. With each step, a strange calmness moves over me—strange because I have a million reasons to be nervous. Yet, I only feel relieved that Breaker is here beside me. “Do you want the bathroom first?” I ask.

“You go ahead, I can after you. Besides, I’d like to take a shower. I brought some of my clothes back from the bunkhouse. I put them in your closet. I don’t want you to think I was being overconfident because I wasn’t. I just knew if you would give me the chance, I was going to be prepared. I promise it was only something to sleep in and two outfits. That’s it. The rest of my clothes that Cooper and I went out and bought are in the bunkhouse because I know you think this is moving too fast. I want you to understand that there’s no pressure from me, Doc. None .”

“We are moving too fast. Seriously, you have to admit that you feel that way too, Breaker.” In response, he grins down at me but doesn’t verbally respond. “What?” I prompt.

“Honey, if I had my way, all my shit would be in your closet. I would be buried deep inside you every night, and every man in this town and the surrounding ones would know that you belong to me.”

I listen to his words and I’m pretty sure I stop breathing. I don’t even know how to respond. My mouth goes completely dry.

“Indy?” he pushes.

“I’ll go first,” I squeak, my voice strained and squeaky because my throat is so dry.

“Okay, honey,” he says gently.

I stare up at him, drawn in by the tender smile resting on his face. I like the way it makes the corner of his eyes crinkle. “Okay,” I answer, unable to say anything else as I walk backward to the bathroom, so I can keep my eyes on his beautiful face. I don’t want to turn away from him. I need to memorize this moment because I suddenly realize that it’s too late to stop my fall. I don’t know how I’m going to protect my heart if Breaker hurts me.

Because I’m already gone for the man.